northerntrash

they/Brit/old // fandom cryptid // turns out I'm not dead yet who knew

[theartofangirling]

I’ve been waiting a year to post this

[thetimeidonthave]

waking up today and opening tumblr like

[nerdexpress]

damn no wonder i used this place to cope in 2013 i forgot how fun this shit was

[vampyrska-azhdaya-deactivated20]

[cuttingchai-deactivated20260528]

an accurate representation of my tumblr dashboard

[vir-ignotus]

As much as I dislike Pippin, it occurs to me that the moment in Moria when he knocks the dwarf skeleton down the well was the moment he transformed into the saviour of Middle-earth.

He knocks the skeleton down the well, alerting the orcs. The ensuing battle alerts the Balrog. Gandalf dies fighting the Balrog, which allows him to return as Gandalf the White. That allows Gandalf the power to rid Theoden of Saruman’s spell. That ensures that the Rohirrim march to help Gondor, including going past the Paths of the Dead so Aragorn can summon the uber-useful Dead Men of Dunharrow. That ensures ultimate victory at Pelennor Fields. That allows the army to live to march to Mordor and distract Sauron at the Battle of the Black Gate long enough that Frodo and Sam can destroy the Ring. In other words, total prat though he undoubtedly is, Pippin is the actual hero of LOTR. Or did I miss something?

Also, his corpse-in-the-well antics are responsible for a bunch of other useful stuff, e.g.: the death of the Witch-king (back to normal Theoden —> Rohirrim at Pelennor —> Eowyn at Pelennor = one dead Nazgul); the survival of Gondor and Aragorn taking the crown (Gandalf vs. Balrog —> revived Gandalf —> Gandalf at Minas Tirith —> Gandalf taking charge of the defences —> Gandalf knocking Denethor into funeral pyre = obstacle to accession of Aragorn removed). So yeah. That’s a thing.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

JUNE? what's next, July??? Heaven forbid, August??? When does the nonsense end!!!

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i have received some ATROCIOUS news 

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Please STFU about September that's not a real word

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i have a terrible announcement to make

[northerntrash]

certain dark things

luthien x thuringwethil // teen+ // canon-typical violence // 9.5k

There is a song, there is always a song, where the princess is rescued from the monster, where good triumphs over evil, where the stars shine brighter at the end of all things. In which Luthien seeks a monster, but finds something else. 

our contribution to @tolkienrsb: art here! / artist: @meredithsdardenne / author: @northerntrash

[aredhels]

certain dark things » luthien x thuringwethil for @tolkienrsb, collaboration with @northerntrash

I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

[northerntrash]

GREEK MYTHOLOGY 13/100

Demeter ||| Δημήτηρ ||| The goddess of grain and the earth’s bounty

“For every seed of godliness, kindness and justice sowed, there will be surely be a harvest of goodness, significance and greatness” – Sunday Adelaja

[mymythologyphasedidntend]

“Would You Fuck A Clone Of Yourself” but make it Greek Gods

Hephaestus: I don’t want to fuck a clone of myself because that would be gay sex and I am not gay.

Ares: I’m not gay, but I would actually totally fuck a clone of myself.

Artemis: I’m gay, but I still don’t want to fuck a clone of myself, that’s gross and weird.

Hermes: I don’t want to fuck my clone because my self-loathing is THAT strong.

Apollo: I’d totally fuck my clone because I want to know if I’m good in bed.

Aphrodite: I would totally fuck my clone because who would no better how to fuck ME than ME.

Hera: I’d totally do all sorts of weird things with my clone that I’d be too embarrassed to do with anyone else.

Zeus: To be honsent, fucking my clone has always been my fantasy.

Poseidon: It’s basically the same as masturbating right? So no big deal.

Hades: It’s not the same as masturbating, it’d be like having sex with your twin. Wrong and bad!

Demeter: I would not have sex with my clone because what if my clone is evil?

Dionysus: Not only would I have sex with my clone, I’d probably make a bunch of clones and just get it on with them because that’s how pro clone-fucking I am.

[northerntrash]

MODERN AESTHETICS: The Witch King of Angmar

“Time takes it all whether you want it to or not, time takes it all. Time bares it away, and in the end there is only darkness. Sometimes we find others in that darkness, and sometimes we lose them there again” ― Stephen King

[thatsbelievable]

[assiraphales]

aziraphale is the type of person to water a plant everyday and go on about how lovely it is only to be told by crowley that it’s a fake plant

[anareola]

FILI IS MY FAVORITE DWARF

[nerdbirdsworld]

HE IS THE BEST! I’m not crying @legolaslovely @dreams-of-wander @patchworkideas

[nadiea]

but that is how a tragedy like ours or king lear breaks your heart—by making you believe that the ending might still be happy, until the very last minute.

[kiandra-layne]

GIF MAKER POSITIVITY MEME ↻ day three → pastel | ineffable husbands

“I like to think none of this would have worked out if you weren’t, at heart, just a little bit a good person.”

“And if you weren’t, deep down, just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing.”