Just imagine, Steve: Superhuman Registration Act!
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@not-angsty-human
Just imagine, Steve: Superhuman Registration Act!
The most important writing lesson I ever learned was not in a screenwriting class, but a fiction class.
This was senior year of college. Most of us had already been accepted into grad school of some sort. We felt powerful, we felt talented, and most of all, we felt artistic.
It was the advanced fiction workshop, and we did an entire round of workshops with everyoneâs best stories, their most advanced work, their most polished pieces. It was very technical and, most of all, very artistic.
IE: They were boring pieces of pretentious crap.
Now the teacher was either a genius OR was tired of our shit, and decided to give us a challenge. Flash fiction, he said. Write something as quickly as possible. Make it stupid. Make it not mean a thing, just be a quick little blast of words.Â
And, of course, we all got stupid. Little one and two pages of prose without the barriers that it must be good. Little flashes of characters, little bits of scenarios.
And they were electric. All of them. So interesting, so vivid, not held back by the need to write important things or artistic things.Â
One sticks in my mind even today. The guys original piece was a thinky, thoughtful piece relating the breaking up of threesomes to volcanoes and uncontrolled eruptions that was just annoying to read. But his flash fiction was this three page bit about a homeless man who stole a truck full of coca cola and had to bribe people to drink the soda so he could return the cans to recycling so he could afford one night with the prostitute he loved.
It was funny, it was heartfelt, and it was so, so, so well written.
And just that one little bit of advice, the write something short and stupid, changed a ton of peopleâs writing styles for the better.
It was amazing. So go. Go write something small. Go write something thatâs not artistic. Go write something stupid. Go have fun.
The most useful piece of advice I got from my college profs when we were making our 4th year films was âPeople remember you if you make them laughâ.
The similarities between Captain America and Austin Powers
(I donât know why I did this)
DELETE!
Weâre all proud
what the fuck are half of the urls on this website.
i just saw someone with âcumleakâ as an url
what the fuck
i guess howard couldnât have predicted how hard the 2008 economic crysis would hit hydra
imagine your otp
âwhy do u ship thatâ honey these assholes ship themselves i am only a vessel
itâs too bad that the fact that harry is quite literally the jesus christ of the wizarding world really damages his ability to follow his promising career as a professional seeker. viktor krum, best seeker in the world, genuinely compliments harry on how well he flies and harry starts to have an intelligent conversation with him about their techniques⌠ludo bagman ANOTHER professional athlete IMMEDIATELY comments upon harryâs incredible flying ability like⌠auror who???? like, relax. take a few years off and just go be the best seeker alive, why not? you are literally going to become minister of magic anyway at some point and you are literally swimming in ancestral peverell gold⌠go. go be a seeker. have a gay experience. travel the world in a kind-spirited and incredibly laid back atmosphere. youâve seen death harry. itâs time
As a student, the most comforting words youâll ever hear are âi havenât started eitherâ
Tips That Can Save Your Kidâs Life.
THIS IS IMPORTANTÂ
When I was a child, from the time I was about four and could understand things, my mom told me and my brother that we should have a secret word. That way, if we were ever in trouble or felt unsafe and we didnât want the people around us to know we needed her to come get us, we could let her know. So she let us pick the word and my brother and I chose the phrase âpeanut butter cups.â (Iâm happy to share the phrase now since both my brother and I are adults now).Â
I used the phrase twice in my life. Once, I was at a friends house when I eight years old. Her dad got really drunk and was throwing things against the wall. I was really scared and I didnât want to draw attention to myself on the phone when I called my mom to come get me because I didnât know if he would get more violent if I asked her to come get me. So I called her and was calm and after a couple minutes I asked âHey mommy, did you get me those peanut butter cups from the store?â And she said âIâll be right there.â And she came and got me within minutes.Â
Second, I was a teenager spending the night at a friends house. Her brother and dad were drinking and they started talking about things that made me uncomfortable - ie: what they liked to do to women. My friend didnât seem perturbed and said that was normal for them and that I shouldnât worry. But I was worried because they were really drunk and I was 15 and the only âwomanâ around that wasnât related to them. I went in my friends room, told her I needed to call my mom and say goodnight. Before I hung up with her I asked âNext time we go to the store, can we get some peanut butters cups? Iâve been craving them.â And she came and got me, just like that.Â
Two incidents, one as a young child, one years later as a teen. Donât discredit this stuff, it fucking works. My brother used it a few times too. Let your child pick the word and no never, ever, ever, ever get mad at them for using it no matter what it is.Â
DO NOT SCROLL PAST THAT.
john: youâre a drama queen
sherlock, refusing to let john phone the police about a bomb beneath parliament because he sees a perfect opportunity to get john alone for an elaborately-staged apology, complete with a perfectly-timed reveal of himself as the hero: how dare you
john: youâre a drama queen
sherlock, literally jumping over a table in the middle of his best man speech: how dare you
john: youâre a drama queen
sherlock, escaping from hospital, buying a brand new bottle of perfume, rearranging the furniture, buying a phone and bluetooth earpiece, stealing a wheelchair, recruiting wigginsâ help, and hiding in the dark with john in a fake house: how DARE you
I usually have two or more sets of headcanons with characters Headcanon A: what I think realistically Headcanon B: what I think is fucking hilarious
you forgot C: what is heart-crushing and awful but fun to inflict on friends
option E: what is unrealistic but self-indulgent and fun and all of this is fake anyway
option F: fuck canon, weâre all going over to this happy place together. come join us, there is cake.
@elinorx Iâm tagging you C.
pots and kettles @francesca-wayland. but i regret nothing >=). I suspect you are the same.Â
Vampire writers really are not tapping into true potential. Why whine for eternity about their lost humanity or fall in love with a mortal teenager when vampires could like walk to space or some shit
Vampires who finally get all the dead bodies off Mount Everest so they can be buried.
Vampire policemen who can easily walk into danger and rescue others, wearing bullet and stab wounds as badges of honor. Some kid they saved started giving them corks to âplugâ the holes, and itâs become a trend, kids decorating plugs to give to their local policemen for the vampire department.
Vampire scientists who can work 24/7 when a new epidemic shows up, or when working in forensics, and then just take a few years off.Â
Vampire scientists who can research radiation and just get a laptop with internet and wait the few hundred years until theyâre safe to be around again, watching tv shows and reading all the books they want to, because yeah, it gets lonely, but theyâll have centuries after to make up for it.
Or maybe theyâd be doing it in groups so they donât end up lonely. Earning their money for the downtime by making it a realityshow. Who needs Big Brother? We got a pile of vampires who have to live together for decades, thatâs gonna be drama! If you donate blood this month, you get to choose a challenge for them!Â
Vampires, guys, Vampires.