Unbetitelt

[what-even-is-thiss]

It’s amazing sometimes what a singular glass of Gatorade can do for you

[matthgeek]

agreed. But glass? Pouring Gatorade into a glass is a level of classiness I had not previously perceived

[what-even-is-thiss]

I use the powder and I’ve gotta mix it in something

[undercover-catty]

what kind of freak drinks sodas in powder form

yeah sure it's mixed in water but powder ???

[what-even-is-thiss]

Gatorade isn’t a soda lady time I checked

[undercover-catty]

this is not the question at hand and you know it

[what-even-is-thiss]

Gatorade mix is a super common household item idk what to tell you

[not-serious-dude]

meanwhile Im sitting here, reading this with my jar of basically Gatorade made from powder (different brand from my country)

[malcolm-f-tucker]

I wish people would stop saying “It’s July. Well done for wasting half a year.” Did you make someone smile in the past six months? Did you stroke a cat or throw a stick for a dog? Did you learn a new fact or teach someone a new joke? Did you laugh, cry, scream or sing in the past six months? Because if so, congratulations for not wasting your time at all.

[malcolm-f-tucker]

Happy 10th birthday to this, my post of all time. Glad to have spent the last 10+ years wasting my time on tumblr with you all 💖

[woman-becomer]

imagine a goat with a hat

STOP-

what hat did you give the goat what is the instinctual hat you gave to this goat

[not-serious-dude]

what hat did you give the goat?

Party Hat

Top Hat

Fedora

Newsboy Hat/Cap

Cowboy Hat

Wizard/Witch Hat

Bowler Hat

Peter Pans Hat

Bucket Hat

Straw Hat

Hat with Flaps on the side

other

Remaining time: 4 days 21 hours

[what-even-is-thiss]

I’ve been attempting to make a slightly upgraded version of a dirt house.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Somebody wanted to see the inside of the house

Just a pretty standard Minecraft base if I’m being honest

Here’s some other angles of the outside. I haven’t gotten around to putting vines all over it or making the staircase to the roof look better so the other sides look a little plain.

I like the view from the roof and the windows though.

The broken portal nearby looks cool at night in my opinion.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Most normal response to a Minecraft dirt house

[not-serious-dude]

Some people get so pissed at others not playing "the correct way".

Which is especially weird for a Game with so many possibilities like Minecraft

[what-even-is-thiss]

My dad read me stuff like the lord of the rings and the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy and Sherlock Holmes as bedtime stories when I was a kid and I dunno what sort of effect that had on my development but whatever it did I think I’m making it everyone else’s problem

[cringyfuckassbitch]

do parents actually read their kids bedtime stories?

I always thought that was like a cheesy trope in a tv show or smth

[what-even-is-thiss]

Yeah and reading to kids helps them build language skills

[not-serious-dude]

I second that it helps kids build language skills,

reading to us was really important to my parents, despite them not having much free time at all

Im probably off for the better because of that and also a big book lover

[pangur-and-grim]

btw I was in a voice call with my friends last night and they shouted at me for like 10 minutes straight about the sharpened bananas. some very hurtful things were said, such as "it sucks so bad", "it really really sucks", and "stop saying it doesn't suck."

and you know what? I learned something from that call. sometimes, you have to ignore all your friends and your loved ones. sometimes, it is you against the world, and that's alright. because the sharpened bananas sentence is good.

[pangur-and-grim]

maybe takeout will soothe me

[hellenhighwater]

No Bones Jones, nobody does it like you.

[hellenhighwater]

Some bones, for comparison

[buggyhuman]

I love how the German people all come together against our common enemy: Friedrich Merz

[the-rat12]

objectifying women: ❌ womanifying objects: ✅

[translatingpostsintolithuanian]

moterų objektifikavimas: ❌ objektų moterifikavimas: ✅

[not-serious-dude]

[forestlion]

kms actually

[not-serious-dude]

[egberts]

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Voting ended onJun 27

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[curioscurio]

[not-serious-dude]

[transcarcinization]

eating toast w cheese and honey and fresh raspberries you WISH you were me!!!

[not-serious-dude]

[what-even-is-thiss]

Gosh I hate the sun. It’s stolen everything from me, including my electrolytes. I needed those.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Helios give me back my water you bastard

[what-even-is-thiss]

I’m currently recovering from heat exhaustion and everyone who’s ever tried to convince me that summer heat is good actually owes me five dollars.

[not-serious-dude]

Im totally on your side

I wish you a very "Get better soon" :)

[pangur-and-grim]

my humours have balanced. I have become mentally normal again

[pangur-and-grim]

no, mentally normal people can still write spider sex books

[teaboot]

YOU

[not-serious-dude]

wait youre both:

cat owners with a lil boy

living in Canada

creative

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.

[stavarosthearcane]

Good Job.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#this post gets me every time 

It’s from two days ago fam how many times could there have been

[heroofthreefaces]

do you think no one else has time travel

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Happy one month anniversary to this post that has not allowed me a single day of fucking peace since I made it.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#surprise reblog!! 

STOP IT’S BEEN MONTHS. MONTHS!

YOU CAN STOP.

[roach-works]

wow if only you had a time machine

[transdaughterofthesun]

Honestly having reached a billion notes I think it’s safe to say that in the Year of our lord 2041, this is the most popular tumblr post out there.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I’m killing your parents before you’re born

[dogpuppy]

[notbecauseofvictories]

SUPER TOP SECRET WORK HACK!!! If you explicitly tell people, "You are an adult and a professional, I trust you to do your job; just keep me in the loop and let me know if there are questions," then thank and/or praise them when they accomplish your mutual goals? they will keep doing things for and with you. Sometimes they will even side with you over other people in the organization, because you've taken the time to establish that baseline respect and trust! hashtag winning or whatever

[sonneillonv]

I just want to say this can work with kids too, mostly because of the 'respect' thing.

This past month, Parks & Rec has been doing a lot of work on the field adjacent to my school. They have trucks with flatbeds, mowing/tree-cutting/postholing machinery, etc. And when they arrived, I (campus monitor) was told I would need to herd the kids away from the trucks/machinery and basically prevent them from creating a dangerous situation.

So when recess came around and the kids stampeded out the door I held them up and I said (being funny but at the same time serious, you know how it is, kids listen better if you're funny)

"Okay, I know that you're all smart AND mature, right? And talented and good looking? Definitely the smartest and most talented class in this school? (I say this to every class, they're all 'my favorites'.) And because you're SO intelligent and mature, I don't need to actually TELL you that these guys have vehicles and machinery that you need to stay clear of, right? Because I know you figured that out already, and I also know that YOU know how sad I would be if any of you were run over, or squashed, or had a pole fall on you. I would be SO SAD, like, I would probably have to lie down on the floor and cry. So you're not going to make me cry, right? I can trust you to stay away from the trucks and machines no matter where they are on the field? Because you're wonderful and amazing? My favorites? My inspiration?"

And they're laughing at me of course, because I'm being so dramatic. Some of them are "Yes, and-"ing my dramatics and inventing more involved mourning processes I should undertake if any of them get run over. Some of them are yelling at me that they are NOT mature yet and they are VERY STUPID and I should know this.

It's been three weeks. We had one conversation about it. None of them have gone anywhere near the trucks. This is actually in excess of the typical elementary-schooler's working memory and I'm very proud of them. I haven't had to blow the whistle at ONE person for getting too close even when the trucks were literally 40 feet from the actual playground.

"I know I can trust you to do this", even when phrased with humor, is like a magic key that unlocks teamwork+cooperation.

[onbearfeet]

I usually phrased it to middle-schoolers as, "I was a weird artist before I was a teacher, so I don't understand how children work, really. So I am going to treat you guys like adults unless and until you give me a reason not to." It's amazing how far they'll go to keep that adult status.