Hi, I'm Ralph Campbell, and welcome to Jackass

The name's Ralph Campbell, or the province of Alberta. Ask me anything. (Ralph is from the I Am Matthiewian Project. This is an independent rp blog)

[zankiegrance]

"If I was gay…" and "I’m not gay but…." by Zachary Colin Rance

[neongenesisevangaylion-deactiva]

no homo level 1,000

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

no, I’m saying your face was priceless when all those bikini babes turned into Oliver.  I only wish I had brought a camera 

[notallalbertans]

dick

[onlymiddleground]

*laughs* alright, no more dream ruining.  *smirks* you know… since I can alter dreams I could probably give you some pretty good ones, just tell me what you want.  it’s the least I can do to make up for it

[notallalbertans]

I’ll keep that in mind, how much longer you got it?

[onlymiddleground]

until tomorrow

[notallalbertans]

Fuck, I can't think of anything.

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

no, I’m saying your face was priceless when all those bikini babes turned into Oliver.  I only wish I had brought a camera 

[notallalbertans]

dick

[onlymiddleground]

*laughs* alright, no more dream ruining.  *smirks* you know… since I can alter dreams I could probably give you some pretty good ones, just tell me what you want.  it’s the least I can do to make up for it

[notallalbertans]

I'll keep that in mind, how much longer you got it?

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

no, I’m saying your face was priceless when all those bikini babes turned into Oliver.  I only wish I had brought a camera 

[notallalbertans]

dick

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

really? ‘cause all I saw was blond~ and Lloyd declaring your superiority, maybe I should tell him that too?

[notallalbertans]

I”M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS! YOU FUCKING CAME IN THE WORST PART! THERE WERE BIKINI BABES EVERYWHERE AND IT WAS GREAT!

[onlymiddleground]

it was perfect you mean~ *cackles* 

[notallalbertans]

I’LL KICK YOUR ASS

[onlymiddleground]

come on bro, you love me

[notallalbertans]

Fuck off. Your timing is shit.

[onlymiddleground]

my timing is the best

[notallalbertans]

So you're saying you're more excited for Oliver than bikini babes?

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

really? ‘cause all I saw was blond~ and Lloyd declaring your superiority, maybe I should tell him that too?

[notallalbertans]

I”M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS! YOU FUCKING CAME IN THE WORST PART! THERE WERE BIKINI BABES EVERYWHERE AND IT WAS GREAT!

[onlymiddleground]

it was perfect you mean~ *cackles* 

[notallalbertans]

I’LL KICK YOUR ASS

[onlymiddleground]

come on bro, you love me

[notallalbertans]

Fuck off. Your timing is shit.

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

really? ‘cause all I saw was blond~ and Lloyd declaring your superiority, maybe I should tell him that too?

[notallalbertans]

I”M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS! YOU FUCKING CAME IN THE WORST PART! THERE WERE BIKINI BABES EVERYWHERE AND IT WAS GREAT!

[onlymiddleground]

it was perfect you mean~ *cackles* 

[notallalbertans]

I'LL KICK YOUR ASS

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

really? ‘cause all I saw was blond~ and Lloyd declaring your superiority, maybe I should tell him that too?

[notallalbertans]

I"M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS! YOU FUCKING CAME IN THE WORST PART! THERE WERE BIKINI BABES EVERYWHERE AND IT WAS GREAT!

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

  slip of the tongue, that’s all *innocent smile* 

[notallalbertans]

Bull fucking shit

[onlymiddleground]

*grins, he’s going to run in a second* I… mayhavegottendreamwalkingpowers *runs*

[notallalbertans]

YOU MOTHERFUCKER *Runs after him*

[onlymiddleground]

*cackling.  he’s running for his life*

[notallalbertans]

*The chase is on*

[onlymiddleground]

*grins* so you like blonds? should I tell you know who?

[notallalbertans]

I DO NOT! I'LL KICK YOUR ASS

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

  slip of the tongue, that’s all *innocent smile* 

[notallalbertans]

Bull fucking shit

[onlymiddleground]

*grins, he’s going to run in a second* I… mayhavegottendreamwalkingpowers *runs*

[notallalbertans]

YOU MOTHERFUCKER *Runs after him*

[onlymiddleground]

*cackling.  he’s running for his life*

[notallalbertans]

*The chase is on*

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

  slip of the tongue, that’s all *innocent smile* 

[notallalbertans]

Bull fucking shit

[onlymiddleground]

*grins, he’s going to run in a second* I… mayhavegottendreamwalkingpowers *runs*

[notallalbertans]

YOU MOTHERFUCKER *Runs after him*

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

*grins* you do! I heard you myself

[notallalbertans]

Well you heard wrong!

[onlymiddleground]

*grins* nope~ you were saying “oh Oliver~ you look so good in that bikini~”

[notallalbertans]

Was not!

[onlymiddleground]

was too

[notallalbertans]

was not!

[onlymiddleground]

was too, saw.. heard, the whole thing.  there had to at least be ten of them

[notallalbertans]

…saw? *raises an eye brow*

[onlymiddleground]

slip of the tongue, that’s all *innocent smile* 

[notallalbertans]

Bull fucking shit

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

*grins* you do! I heard you myself

[notallalbertans]

Well you heard wrong!

[onlymiddleground]

*grins* nope~ you were saying “oh Oliver~ you look so good in that bikini~”

[notallalbertans]

Was not!

[onlymiddleground]

was too

[notallalbertans]

was not!

[onlymiddleground]

was too, saw.. heard, the whole thing.  there had to at least be ten of them

[notallalbertans]

...saw? *raises an eye brow*

[notallalbertans]

"Hey Ralph" Tanner said "how things going between you and that boyfriend."

"Don’t say boyfriend so loud, dammit. Think he might be mad a me, but admitably, I do a lot of dumb shit."

[agatesilverandtopaz]

"Cool we can even make him some matching reins and bridle.

[notallalbertans]

"And we can make it less fucking boring than his current one."

[agatesilverandtopaz]

"So true I can show you how to do the leather work for it and everything."

[notallalbertans]

"But can we make it blue."

[notallalbertans]

Where do you keep going to?

I left a note on the fridge, I told you I had to go make sure those horses made it to the client.

[lonestar-rp]

*so much* Burning a hole in your pocket, then?

[notallalbertans]

Lets get fucking wasted.

[lonestar-rp]

Works for me. Let’s go.

[notallalbertans]

Hell yeah! *he grinned, grabbing the keys to his truck off the coffee table*

[notallalbertans]

"Hey Ralph" Tanner said "how things going between you and that boyfriend."

"Don’t say boyfriend so loud, dammit. Think he might be mad a me, but admitably, I do a lot of dumb shit."

[agatesilverandtopaz]

"Cool we can even make him some matching reins and bridle.

[notallalbertans]

"And we can make it less fucking boring than his current one."

[notallalbertans]

MB: *M!A dream walker* *spots his brother snoozing on the couch, grins and slips inside*

*He’s having a wonderful dream about kicking Lloyd’s ass in every rodeo event, there are also bikini babes on dinosaurs because fuck yeah dreams*

[onlymiddleground]

*grins* you do! I heard you myself

[notallalbertans]

Well you heard wrong!

[onlymiddleground]

*grins* nope~ you were saying “oh Oliver~ you look so good in that bikini~”

[notallalbertans]

Was not!

[onlymiddleground]

was too

[notallalbertans]

was not!