lines from 2021 that made me lose my mind
literally lines of dialogue from social media and movies and books and series that have made me laugh so hard i cried during this wild little year of ours!
" you are so intelligent. why do you do such stupid things? "
" we got the gouda governor over here! "
" you're my hoe. my heaven on earth. "
" well, here's another story about my kids roasting the SHIT out of me. "
" you beautiful savage. "
" cell phones on silent, and shut your fucking mouth. the show is about to begin. "
" you have the credit score of a homeless ghost. "
" 100% getting your dick sucked for that. "
" you were so close to a revolutionary thesis and then you betrayed me and every citizen of good standing. "
" every night i say good night to you, and every night you never say it back. what's the problem, NAME? do you not want me to have a good night? "
" that wasn't a cookie, man! that was a piece of his heart... "
" i'm just gonna say this; i find that arousing, and let's move on. "
" do you know how hard it is to be tough when you're holding a pink cupcake holder in your hand? "
" no, we can still salvage this. put on the mcdonalds uniform. "
" why don't you spend more time with bruce springsteen and find out how fucked up you are? "
" if his dick kills me, do NOT prosecute him! he caught ME slipping, that's on ME! "
" i feel uncomfortable around tall people, what if they try to lick my head? "
" there are at least three houses in new orleans. "
" WRONG! i'm right here, you fucking BRUSSEL sprout. "
" my heart was murdered by the word "from". nobody says "i from you". "
" i'd like to go on record as being opposed to the use of violence being used for purposes of conflict resolution, however-- "
" he may be a perv, but that's my dad. "
" hangers are for sunday school clothes. bring me a rock! "
" that goes in the buttbank. "
" i like you. you know how to laugh. "
" i'm pretty sure it's not supposed to do that. are your parents pelicans or something? "
" are you sure you're out of granddaughters? can you check in the back or something? "
" where's your fucking rage? where's your anger? RISE! RISE! RISE! "
" well, i don't know how to tell you this, but he went on a homoerotic voyage to the most dangerous place on earth. "
" the old heads do it right, you young bucks don't know. "
" you just called me a bitch? well bitch means dog, and dogs bark, and bark is from trees, and trees are part of nature, and nature is beautiful, so thank you for calling me beautiful! "
" no, no, no, no. i'm just drunk... aAHHHHHH! "
" i hope... that i do not live to see this. "
" no, don't embarrass yourself. i love you though. "
" you mean there's some kind of new pokemon called THERAPY?? "
" i'd kick a child in the face, for a piece of pizza like that, okay? "
" from the womb to the tomb, exhausted. "
" checkmate, boomers, we made it gay. "
" you want me to go to a meeting? the same thing that killed julius caesar? "
" this is the ass of a FAILURE! "
" it's officially none of your damn business, sir/ma'am! "
" it's under the sauce. "
" get off the bus, you ugly bastard. "
" i want someone to see in me the same possibilities that ocean spray saw in cranberries. "
" i have avoided explaining this for over 25 years. i am not going to start doing it now. "
" in home alone 2 the dad screams bloody murder because kevin spent $967 on room service but he also abandoned his son twice so maybe time to shut the fuck up? "
" get out of there, he's a priest. "
" oh my god they were loot mates. "
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