I needed you there too wipe my first tear,
When I scraped my knee riding a bike for the first time.
I needed you there, too celebrate the day you brought me into the world, and granted me life.
I needed you there, to point out my mistakes, and teach me wrong from right.
I needed you there, the nights I would cry and wonder why I wasn’t enough, for you too stay by my side.
I needed you there, through my first heartbreak, when I couldn’t eat or sleep, to wipe the tears from my eyes.
I needed you there, when I got my period, too embarrass me and tell me I was going too be alright.
I needed you there, too tuck me in, and sing a sweet song or a short lullaby.
I needed you there, too send me off to school with a kiss, an I love you & goodbye
I needed you there, too remind me of the beauty I hold, cause somewhere in life I forgot .
I needed you there, when I sang for the first time, at my elementary talent show, I got nervous & stumbled a lot.
I needed you there, to hold me and play with my hair as we gossip about boy drama.
I needed you mom, more then ever, but you started a new life,
I needed you then, but I don’t need you now.
I’m 19 and a high school drop out.
Kicked out and left on the streets, stripping was my way of income.
When I lost it all, I asked for a home, you ignored me and again went ghost.
You told my sister too take care of me, and I always wondered why, why you didn’t love me enough while I loved you the most.
Why you would look at me, like you despised me everyday.
Why you took care of me for 2 years before sending me away.
Why I couldn’t get an I love you, not even once a week.
Why would you leave us , and start a new family.
Why weren’t you there when I got mobbed the first time,
No hugs no worries, “they wouldn’t have mobbed you if you didn’t do anything first” was her reply.
When I was losing myself, in depression and anxiety, why weren’t you there too remind me of my worth.
Am I not your daughter, your blood, the woman that you birthed.
Or am I a reminder of your past self, because I sure did go down the same road.
But I wouldn’t be who I am today, if you were there and if you would have known.
A washed up, deadbeat daughter is all you’ll ever see.
I accept the fact that I never needed you, but maybe, you needed me.
prguitarman
kianamaiart
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