All the thoughts that float in my head

Observations that most the time I go what is wrong with this picture.

[observingisfun]

It's been along time....

Lots have been going on and stuff. At times I find myself overly stressed and being an insomniac. I'll return full force later....being up late can mAke you think about things....

[observingisfun]

Who's going to be your maid of honor?

That seems to be the million dollar question right now. 

Personally I have no idea. In the span of a week i've lost my friends. Been replaced by my bestie and have no idea how it all happened. 

Right now if we had the money I would jump a plane with my fiancé and elope in vegas or something. I also don't want to be killed by our parents. 

I'm seriously considering asking my cat, Harri. I think she'd make a good one. 

Sometime I think I'm like Amy Farrah Fowler from the Big Bang Theory. 

"You're not the first girls I thought were friends with me who ended up shunning me." -Amy Farrah Fowler 

Why does this have to be so hard?!?!?

[observingisfun]

The pissing contest continues....

This time it's over my birthday. My parents are gone this week, which also happens to be my birthday week. We've already celebrated. Gifts given to my brother and I. No were not twins just have birthdays two days apart. Now it comes down to my fiance and my "friends". 

They have had an outright pissing contest over my bday. I'm to the point "I don't care. I'm just going to stay in bed under the covers." I really could care less at this point if anything is done for my birthday. It's my favorite time of the year. I've had a really really rough start to this year and it doesn't see to want to get better other than the fact that I got ENGAGED!!! 

At this point maybe i'll just runaway and then nobody would have to worry about my birthday. It seems as it's always an after thought to everyone anyways. 

Enough pity partying and venting....

Until next time. 

~GC 

[observingisfun]

This is just so hard.

I've heard that come out of one of my "friends" mouths. That phrase was used after her mom had outpatient surgery. my mom has had heart surgery after heart surgery since I was about 10 years old. I have been taking care of my mom and the rest of my family since I was 10. That's 17 years of my life, I've been doing things that my "friend" has complained about doing for only a week. 

I do laundry, clean the house, make sure my mom takes the right amounts of medicine, cook meals, check blood sugar levels and anything else imaginable. 

If they want to know what hard is they should come be in my shoes for about 5 minutes and they'll understand what hard is. 

Don't complain to me how hard it is until you know what it's like to be basically your parents maid. 

Until next time.... 

~GC

[observingisfun]

What has happened to my friends....

Next week is my birthday!!! I always get excited when it's my birthday because hey that means i get my birthday money and get to go to my favorite restaurant and pig out...::Happy Dance:: Although I almost share a birthday with my brother and my parents until I went to college made us celebrate it together for our birthdays together. Now we celebrate them apart meaning. They go with him for his birthday dinner and then they go with me to my birthday dinner two nights later. My dad grumbles because he's complaining about having two kids with so close birthdays that still live in the area. My mom is just excited to go out. Then the celebrating continues with my friends and we go out to eat and just have fun. 

This year is a bit depressing for my birthday week. My parents are going on separate vacations. My dad's is a business trip/vacation to Las Vegas and my mom is going to see my aunt in Ohio for the week. My brother and I will most likely have to celebrate our birthdays together this year. The first time in 9 years. I haven't heard any plans from any of my friends about if they are planning something for me. They are probably leaving that up to my fiance but he's a guy. ;) (no offense baby) 

Of course my birthday is one of the most forgettable. Trust me if it wasn't for me reminding my parents they'd probably forget it. It's in that awkward transition into March from February. 

I get it. I'm getting married and stuff and friends may become a thing of the past but it's a hard transition for my friends just to not care anymore. 

It feels like my fiance is my only friend and that my sister is not far behind. Guess that makes it easy when thinking about who to ask as stand ups. Good thing i have eight nieces ;) 

Until next time....

-GC 

[observingisfun]

Pissing Contest

I have male tom cats who like to have a pissing contest every time they see each other. Mostly because they want to impress the girl cats or because they want to prove that they are the alpha and that nobody is better than them. My siamese mostly does it because he gets mad when he doesn't get his way. 

On valentine's day my boyfriend became my fiancé. :D I know it's very cliche but hey at least he asked me. I love him for that and i love him for my ring and how special it is and how he makes me feel very special. You would think that my "friends" would be excited for me and plan a girls night to hear all the details and to see how they could help with the wedding and other things. All I got was a cold shoulder and some mixed signals. 

My coworkers and a select few other people have been excited for me and congratulating me and asking details. Of course we are waiting a little while and don't want to rush things. My boss was literally giggling she was so happy for me. 

My "friends" not feeling the love. I feel rather isolated from my "friends". This is suppose to be a happy time, a time to celebrate. All I get is crickets and one friend who is trying to be sincere but you can tell that she is searching and digging/fishing for information about whether or not they'll be in the wedding. 

Now also instead of getting congratulation responses from my "friends" on Facebook. The pissing contest on Facebook has begun. I get that they love their boyfriends..well they seem out of desperation and that they have no other options sort of thing. I see these "friends" playing anything you can do i can do better and it's like be happy for me! I'm fricking getting married and all you want to do is try and out do me. Sure I love my fiancé and want the whole world to know but when you are purposely making posts about how you love your boyfriend and everything and you don't usually do that. I can tell that you are jealous and I don't know what to say to that because if you are so miserable and you have to prove it than I don't know what to tell you. 

My best friend copies my fiancé and i all the time with our relationship. I just have to think about how miserable you have to be to live through our relationship and try and make it like your own. how is that healthy. It's not.

i sometimes say that my fiancé feels like my only friend. I mean it whole heartedly.

Bitches will be Bitches but they don't need to be bitches to me.

I'm so excited that I'm getting married to my best friend and the love of my life but every time i think about the whole situation with my "friends" I get get depressed. In my head, my "friends" should have been the ones to gather around me, step out of their offices or whatever just to congratulate me and ask me the details of how it happened, not my coworkers. I love my coworkers and they are proving to be more of my friends than my "real" friends. They even had a bet going of when i was going to get engaged. I'm truly loved by my coworkers. I know that their next bet is when is guessing my wedding date. ;) 

With all that has come about with my "friends" it's the last straw with my fiancé so starting this weekend. we're starting a whole new adventure in finding a new church, a new group of people to hang out with and grow together with. 

Is it scary? yes 

does it need to happen? yes 

would i have been able to do it by myself? no 

I'm just starting to see that it's a change that needs to happen but it's one of those really scary changes. I know that with my fiancé by my side i can do anything. 

It just makes me think about also how i treated and thought about some people that i knew that got engaged and everyone gave them the cold shoulder. i'm seeing a pattern here. People with miserable lives trying to make people who have happy lives miserable also. 

Until next time… 

~GC 

[observingisfun]

The copy cat strikes again !!!

I was right my friend did come back with a Tiffany's necklace. Ugh!!!! I know it could just be a regular thing maybe. I am happy to report mine is bigger. Hers is the initials of her and her boytoy. She says that they are engraved & it's like no they're stamped. ;) Just stop stop....this feels like a competition anymore. Until next time -GC

[observingisfun]

[observingisfun]

Doppelgänger

Let's first define doppelgänger: : someone who looks like someone else : a ghost that looks like a living person From m-w.com So I once pointed out to my boyfriend that my besties boyfriend is almost a carbon copy of him. They both like cars, play the same instrument (a guitar), country boys, a sense of style that needs help (I fixed my boyfriend so not so much anymore. Love you baby!) and other settle differences. That only makes me wonder if my bestie searched for her bf just so he'd be like mine. I've often wondered if my bestie was living through our relationship now I think maybe so. I mentioned in my last post a pastor at my church pointed out that she was copying me and my boyfriend and all I have to say if yeah it sure seems like it. She would say that I copied her but now I believe it's the other way around. It often makes me wonder about her. My boyfriend and I actually have a bet going on when they get engaged and if they copy a former friends of ours. That's all to he determined... Until next time. -GC

[observingisfun]

9 Signs You've Met The One

9 Signs You've Met The One, Signs You've Met Your Soul Mate

[observingisfun]

Copycats

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NLT)

I can't sleep as usual. I did get some but that was with my boyfriend cuddling with me and knowing that i'm safe in his arms and knowing that everything will be okay. 

Personal….

I'm gonna get personal here for a minute and get to the nitty gritty. my boyfriend and I have been on a journey the past couple years. He'd been waiting for me for quite awhile. I've been damaged and left to the point where i needed months to get over things. It took him talking about leaving to make me realize that the guy i want to marry is right in front of me. I'm really serious about that part. When I was a junior in high school a pastor from my youth group (1 of 2 or 3) talked to us about relationships and what would be the perfect person you would want to marry and to look for everything on that list. It took two assholes and one guy waiting for me in the wing to look at my list again. The original list resides in my Bible at the beginning of Ruth a great place because every girl wants her Boaz. The most crazy part of this whole thing is my boyfriend fits every single thing on my list. I've been carrying that list around and reading tons of relationship books, thinking something was wrong with me, thinking that i was worthless and that no guy really cared about me. I would cry myself to sleep at night because i thought i would die along never move out of my parents house. I was even told that by a guy who I dated once. I just never realized that my boyfriend would still be waiting for me. 

We had our rough spots. I actually turned him down once. We went our separate ways. He entered into a relationship with a "hot mess" (his words not mine). I called him an asshole, bastard and every possible name I could think of (behind his back rather than to his face) because I know that I not only hurt him but he hurt me as well. We didn't talk for a good couple of months. It took the boy a long time to get back in my good graces. Now he's my boyfriend, the love of my life, my best friend, and my someday. 

Every day now i get a good morning text telling me that I'm beautiful. I know I'm loved and that I'm wanted. :) 

Now to get to what the title of this blog is about… 

the past week, I've encountered two pastors out of thirteen from our church. One who claims to be Facebook stalking our relationship and the other who wonders if we're gonna get married. This was a very surprising encounters with these pastors and it's crazy because who knew that people where watching and observing us so closely. I guess that goes with the "it's about time" scenario. 

The surprising thing that one of the pastors said was I see that your friend is currently copying you about how she acts about her boyfriend on Facebook. 

I was like woah. My boyfriend and I see it a lot in interacting with my friend and her boyfriend. I just didn't realize that other people were also seeing it too. 

My boyfriend and I have our ups and downs and we're not perfect in our relationships but it only makes us stronger. 

My friend and her boyfriend are so awkward. their relationship is forced. they don't know each other. It's almost a relationship of desperation because everyone around my friend is coupled up. I feel like she is trying to live through our relationship with her new boyfriend. 

I heard her even make a comment about if they get married. I'm taking bets about when they'll get engaged. 

Every time i look at my relationship with my boyfriend, I see my friend's relationship not far behind. 

It's not good to copy others. Have your own relationship. I even over heard her boyfriend tonight thinking about looking for things filming in Chicago when they go sometime. After I mentioned seeing something being filmed with my boyfriend. 

I'm just waiting for when she comes to me and she has a Tiffany and Co. necklace. Very much like the one that my boyfriend bought for me. 

Until next time…. 

-GC 

[observingisfun]

Frozen

There is no secret. I love Disney movies! I'm that dork that wants to work in their archives. 

My boyfriend and I recently went and watched Frozen on my request. I couldn't help making some observations with my best friend and her boyfriend to Anna and Hans. I know, I know I lament a lot about them but there is so much wrong with the whole situation. 

The song "Love is an Open Door" really makes fun of that OMG we are so awesome together lets do this thing. My boyfriend and I took two years before he was like "do you want to do this thing" No joke. I love him for that because seriously if was a long time in the making. People were telling us that it was about time when we started dating. My friend not so much when she started dating her current boyfriend. 

The responds I've heard haven't been pretty. Most people are dumbfounded. She says it's a "God thing". I think it's more like Anna and Hans out of convenience. 

Love shouldn't be a convenience. It should be something beautiful. I found my Kristoff. It's really something beautiful. I don't want him around when it's just convenient. I want him around all the time. I know the past couple of weeks I haven't seen him as much as I would have like to but I don't want to put him on a shelf and play with him when I want.  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXGaPNJZCDk 

Until next time. 

-GC

[observingisfun]

He may not be the one but lets plan shit together 6 months in advance

Sorry for the profanity. no..not really 

My bestie told me once that she didn't know if her new boyfriend was the one but she had fallen hard for him. 

I know I know. Facepalm to the forehead. 

From this comes the new topic. I was even leery planning things ahead with my boyfriend until we were really serious. I sometime am still leery about planning things far in advance with my boyfriend. He may laugh at me but you never know what can go wrong or what can happen especially if it's a big financial commitment to something.

I guess you could say I always knew my boyfriend was the one. I was pretty smitten from the beginning. Making trips to Chicago, going camping, taking trips to places far and wide, going to concerts. 

I guess I just don't understand my friend. Really if i didn't think he was the one I would not being making plans with him 4-6 months in advance. It's almost a waste of relationship and time. Why string him along?

In another awkward double date, I watch that boyfriend of my bestie take a good hard look at one of her rings because she liked the cut. I don't think he realizes if he's not making 80,000 or more a year he doesn't have a shot with my friend. It's sad to say but it's true.

It's all just really weird. I really don't want my friend to get hurt or hurt that poor boy. There romance just seems forced.

Until next time.

-GC  

[observingisfun]

Well sorry about not live blogging

It was a little awkward

[observingisfun]

Wait for it....

Live blogging starts right.....NOW!

[observingisfun]

The awkward meeting and subway

My bestie is a cougar well put it simple as that. She’s dating a really younger guy than her. Of course she wants us to meet him. One Wednesday night we did just that at a subway.

It was awkward. Of course my boyfriend grilled him relentlessly and threatened him. I just sat there trying to take it all in. It was awkward. I know it’s in the puppy love stage but I honestly think my friend is seriously desperate.

Their affection seemed pushed and that they were faking it.

I’m sure my boyfriend and I were just sitting there with our mouths open. We weren’t even being affection towards each other because we were dumbfounded by the whole situation.

My friend made a comment about us not touching and holding hands and we played it off like we were just this old couple who didn’t need to do it that anymore. We couldn’t really tell her why we really weren’t doing it.

My boyfriend did most of the talking because I like to observe a person before I start taking to them.

I learned the boy (I can’t call him a man unless he’s over the age of 25) acts really full of himself. He really tries to pass off that holy roller persona. Sorry sweetie my boyfriend trumps that since he’s a pk. If u worked on getting a degree actually use it. I have two degrees and I use them every since day. He’s trying too hard to impress us. When your girlfriend introduces you to her bestie and one of her best guy friends just be yourself don’t try too hard. You lose points in the best friend test.

As for the best friend test he really is failing. Of course he’s got half pluses and a lot of minuses. He really hasn’t done anything to impress me.

Well tonight is the night. My boyfriend and I are going on a double date with my bestie and her “boy toy”. That means a night if live blogging! My boyfriend @spykingar will be also putting in his two cents worth too

Until next time.

-GC

[observingisfun]

Chapstick

I have a few short minutes left on my lunch break so this will be a rather short blog.

A few days after my friend started this relationship with her “boy toy” she text me asking me what Chapstick I use for kissing. I was like huh?

I’m a Chapstick junkie just ask my family and boyfriend. I easily have 20 things of Chapstick. At least 5 or more in my purse at the same time.

So I played a little game on my friend and told her every single brand that I had. Then I thought I’d get a little naughty with what I told her next. I told her to invest in different flavors & put one on before you kiss. Very innocent. I added so you can play a game of what flavor is this one. I don’t do that with my boyfriend, I just grab one and put it one. He has his favorites and I have mine. She text me back"oh good idea! I've been so out of the dating scene I didn't think of that." ::face palm::

Sometimes when u ask me stupid & easily remedied questions you’re gonna either get a smart ass comment from me or I’m gonna be mischievous & naughty. Take your pick.

Until next time….

-GC