My muse’s life is now a jukebox musical, send me 🎤 for a song they’d sing!
RMH
Misplaced Lens Cap
trying on a metaphor

izzy's playlists!
NASA
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JBB: An Artblog!
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Andulka
hello vonnie
Show & Tell

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YOU ARE THE REASON

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

⁂
noise dept.
Sade Olutola

Discoholic 🪩
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@oddoriginalaskmemes
My muse’s life is now a jukebox musical, send me 🎤 for a song they’d sing!
Our muses are getting married! Send 💒 for my muse’s vows to yours
Send me 👕 and I’ll pick a festive sweater for your muse
Send me 👫 and I’ll make our muses as sims
Optional bonus ideas:
Add 👕 for them to swap clothing styles
Add 💋 for them to kiss
Add 🌈 for an AU (feel free to specify)
Add 👈 for them to be aged down
Add 👉 for them to be aged up
Send me “♪♫” and I’ll tell you four songs by four different artists that I associate with my muse
Oglaf Tag Lines (NSFW)
"I remember now why we fell in love. It was for tax purposes."
"I'm not happy that it's all our fault, but at least it's not all my fault."
"I love shower sex. IKEA are less keen."
"All I ever wanted was somebody to blame."
"Sorry, I'm not a firefighter - I dress like this to do burglaries."
"If I meet the man of my dreams I hope he doesn't know about my dreams."
"I'm trying to crowdsource a really good fuck."
"If 'garage sale' was an innuendo for anal sex I would snicker more on weekends."
"I am a generous lover but for selfish reasons."
"A fairy tale ending is really bad for about half the characters."
"Ooh yeah baby, I bet I'd get on well with your parents."
"I never stopped loving you... or started, to be honest."
"How much more pathetic do I need to be before I start getting pity sex?"
"I've got a medical condition. Actually, I guess it's more a fetish."
"I got hit by an ambulance but it was already full."
"I would never fuck an animal unless it was a really good kisser. Like, really, really good."
"I literally nailed a plank once."
"Yours is a finer ass than I will ever touch for free."
"My imaginary girlfriend has real breasts."
"I have travelled to the realm of death and brought back novelty pencils."
"I think I might be great at oral sex, but can you trust the opinion of someone you've blown?"
"True love's okay, but a series of false loves gives you more variety."
"You can stop saying 'fuck', I know what we're doing."
"Expect disappointment and you won't be disappointed."
"Your cock seems sort of bland. I did learn fellatio on sausages, though."
"Wow! I like your temporary tattoos! Temporary in that one day you'll die."
"You're a Jehovah's witness? What's Jehovah accused of?"
"Articlefucker Magazine. I just read it for the articles."
"Just because you're sitting on an octopus doesn't make you king of the sea."
"As my wedding gift to you, I'm not coming."
"If I were any more attractive I'd be totally incompetent."
"I shall eat the hearts of my enemies to gain their strength, then I'll eat broccoli so kids will hate me."
"Sexual innuendo? I can keep it up all night."
"I'm so bad at shoplifting, it's technically looting."
"Please express your sexual desire as an infographic. I understand little else."
"You can't call it 'figure skating' and then expect me not to masturbate."
"God can't see you when it's cloudy."
"Pulling knobs opens doors."
"Sometimes, to find yourself, you have to get lost. So, uh..."
"You can't fuck all the hot guys, logistically, unless your standards are very high indeed."
"I want my funeral to be a sex funeral. How do I make sure that happens?"
"I think you might be on fire but I'm not an expert."
"Love is a game to you, but to me it's a sport. Put on the padding."
"I'm looking for the kind of problems you can solve with sex."
'Shit My Brother Says' Ask Meme
"I went to space and saw God!"
"I didn't even know you liked Star Wars."
"Well, tickle my anus and call me Samantha!"
"You can pass maths and still wear trackies."
"I figured it out! It's call Christianity cause it was started by Christ!"
"Just remember; somewhere in the universe, an alien is taking a shit."
"My grandad just died - SELFIIIEEE!"
"What does it mean if I say "I like sea men"- Oh. SHUT UP!"
"No! [A] is ugly! You should like... erm... [B]! Yes! Imagine [B] in tight leather trousers and no shirt on!"
What would your muse put into a flower crown for mine?
Apple Blossom: A promise
Pink carnation: Gratitude
Red carnation: Flashy
Striped carnation: Refusal
White carnation: Remembrance
Yellow carnation: Cheerful
Bronze chrysanthemum: Excitement
White chrysanthemum: Truth
Red chrysanthemum: Sharing
Yellow chrysanthemum: Secret admirer
Crocus: Foresight
Daffodil: Chivalry
Daisy: Innocence
Forget-Me-Not: Remember me forever
Geranium : Comfort
Heather: Solitude
Hibiscus: Delicate beauty
Holly: Domestic happiness
Hyacinth: Sincerity
Iris: Inspiration
Ivy: Fidelity
Jasmine: Grace and elegance
Lavender: Distrust
Lilac: First love
Magnolia: Dignity
Marigold: Desire for riches
Orchid: Delicate beauty
Pansy: Loving thoughts
Peony: Healing
Poppy: Consolation
Rhododendron: Beware
Pink rose: Admiration/appreciation
Red rose: Passionate love
Red & white rose: Unity
White rose: Purity
Yellow rose: Friendship
Snapdragon: Presumptuous
Sunflower: Adoration
Sweetpea: Shyness
Pink tulip: Caring
Purple tulip: Royalty
Red tulip: Declaration of love
White tulip: Forgiveness
Yellow tulip: Hopelessly in love
Violet: Faithfulness
Wisteria: Steadfast
Illegal Danish: Super Snacks Sentence Starters
“It’s not easy being a diabolical genius, when you have to pay the bills!”
“What hill? We’re standing in the middle of [PLACE].”
“There’s an imposter amongst us… and he touched my ass!”
“Hey, that doesn’t look like your wife!”
“This is not the time for riverdancing.”
“Can I get FIVE MINUTES of sanity in this ZOO?!”
“Uhh… am I late?”
“Oi! Are you gonna pay for that?”
“Well, that doesn’t look right… RUN FOR IT!”
“That’s what I said! But my girlfriend said ‘You need to stop wasting money on stupid crap!’ And I was like 'Stop judging me! They were on sale!’”
“Why would anybody think [NAME]’s an imposter?”
“Take [NAME], he could use the experience.”
“Shouldn’t you be wearing a dress?”
“I only wore it once. And it was sexy.”
“A cross-dressing holy man; brilliant!”
“Ooh, that’s kinda nice. What else you got?”
“So how long does this last?”
“That’s long enough to get the job done… for me, anyway.”
“Please tell me we’re still talking about the same thing.”
“You know you want it!”
“Ew! Get away from me you freak!”
“Urgh, this ain’t gonna look good on the insurance claim…”
“Woah! This isn’t [PLACE]! …Who the hell’re you?”
“Sorry about the whole running-you-over thing and, uh, making you into a hood ornament.”
“I should probably do something to make it up to you.”
“As long as you don’t expect no 'man-loving’ afterwards.”
“It’s more of an adult thing. Nevermind.”
“Well, these are the co-ordinates he gave us…”
“Why do I feel dumber for even coming out here?”
“This is the worst set-up ever.”
“Maybe I’m missing something here.”
“We’re going to find out what’s really going on. Follow me.”
“I am not leaving. Until every one of these cakes. IS IN MY MOUTH.”
“You know, I really need a new dagger.”
“I don’t really get the whole beard thing. I mean I tried to grow a beard but I ended up taking off my pants too much.”
“Could you stop with the constant chattering for a few minutes? It’s making me wanna kill myself.”
“Trust me, there’s something about the sound of your voice… well, some would consider it to be the last thread on a very thin rope.”
“Well, maybe you’re taking the wrong approach?”
“Let’s say I were interested; how would you start the conversation?”
“So, how many people you got?”
“Well, there’s me!”
“Uh, you don’t wanna tell them that… ever…”
“Well, what am I supposed to say?”
“You need to approach 'em like a man!”
“I don’t really do good at small talk…”
“Well, this was pointless.”
“Stop! We know you’re an imposter!”
“You want some of this?!”
“We’re getting our asses kicked! We need help!”
“I’m outta here!”
“…I should’ve worn a dress.”
“Well, it’s been fun.”
'Things I Say Under My Selfies' Ask Memes
"I looked damn good today if I do say so myself"
"I think there’s been a misunderstanding. You see i’m super cute, and yet there is no hoard of people lining up outside my house to smooch my face?"
"Guess which dickhead broke a mug and then sliced his thumb open on it whilst washing pots last night. Did you guess me? Because it was me."
"I’ve gone from pastel goth to comfy goth."
"I got the most wonderfully hideous shirt yesterday and I had to show it off."
"I’m here, I’m queer, I can’t afford any of the food."
"Today is a pink kinda day."
"I am using makeup and sunglasses to cover up the fact I didn’t sleep last night and am about to eat my stress in the form of hash browns."
"I quite possibly achieved the perfect eyeliner wing today and I’m pretty sure I’ll never manage it again."
"In other news, I am - once again - cute as hell."
"Plot twist; I have been Batman this whole time."
"I definitely needed more plaid in my wardrobe."
"Sausage roll crumbs are this month’s hottest accessory."
"So who’s gonna take one for the team and be my valentine?"
"Liquid eyeliner can suck my entire ass."
"You think you can out-festive ME? Bring it the fuck on, I’ll deck you right in the halls!"
"Somebody call Vogue."
"WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME I LOOKED LIKE A TWAT?"
"My necklace is cooler than yours."
"I feel like shit so I went for a walk."
"I’m a scruffbag but I’m a very cute scruffbag."
"Bedhead central, population; me."
"Alas, I’m single as fuck."
"All dressed up with nowhere to go."
"Nothing feels cooler than wearing sunglasses."
"The butterflies have officially taken control of my tummy."
"How’s that one pickup line about space pants go again?"
"Sweet jesus, is that even a smile? What is that? It’s scary."
"What… what is this? What the fuck am I doing? What is with that face?"
"This top is more low-cut than I thought."