just like the white winged dove

she rings like a bell through the night and wouldn't you love to love her? she rules her life like a bird in flight and who will be her lover? all your life you've never seen a woman taken by the wind. would you stay if she promised you heaven? will you ever win? she is like a cat in the dark and then she is the darkness. she rules her life like a fine skylark and when the sky is starless.

[movie-gifs]

Sugar & Spice (2001), dir. Francine McDougall

[odettevalencia]

fknjessie​:

                   jessie  wasn’t  even  in  the  spotlight  ,  he  didn’t  have  hardly  any  pressures  on  himself  to  be  anything  other  than  the  complete  mess  he  was  .  but  he  could  imagine  how  much  pressure  it  was  to  be  in  the  spotlight  ,  how  insane  it  could  really  get  .  the  hunger  for  the  crowd  only  getting  hungrier  .             (            which  was  almost  impossible  to  imagine  being  that  he  felt  his  hunger  was  pretty  strong  .          )             either  way  ,  he  didn’t  read  too  much  into  her  laugh  .  instead  he  just  leaned  forward  ,  crossing  his  arms  on  the  table                (              something  his  mother  would’ve  scolded  him  for  as  a  child  ,  no  elbows  on  the  table  .            )             ⏤        ‟        &    here  i  thought  i  was  doing  the  right  thing  by  giving  your  publicist  a  break  .        „          he  smiled  ,           ‟        i  hear  there’s  a  party  happening  in  a  few  days  ,  what  do  you  say   ?   drop  a  little  lucy   &   see  where  the  night  takes  us    ?         „         jessie  offered  ,  the  idea  of  lsd  not  exactly  an  uncommon  idea  for  the  male  .         ‟        maybe  we  can  climb  up  a  billboard    &   write  some  profound  words    ?      a  protest  of  sorts  ,  we’d  be  doing  our  part  .        „        laughing  ,  he  shook  his  head  as  he  sat  back  in  his  chair  again  .          ‟         then  we  better  shake  on  it  before  you  gain  some  sense  of  clarity   &   change  your  mind  .        „            he  joked  ,  reaching  his  hand  out  to  shake  hers  .

odette laughed loudly at that. sure, in a perfect world, she’d be trying to clean up her act and be better. but this wasn’t that world. the drugs and parties and alcohol were frankly what made her able to cope with the insanity of this lifestyle. it was a full package deal. “what’s she getting paid for if you’re giving her a break?” she teased. “now you’ve got my attention. i’m very into that. as for the billboard, we’ll see. if i’m going to die, i’d rather go a different way than ‘fell off billboard while tripping on acid,’” she said with a small laugh. she reached out and shook his head, thought she gave him a look. “i’m not cruel, nor soulless, but if it makes you feel better,” she teased. 

[odettevalencia]

atelizabeth​:

“ah,” elizabeth breathed out in realization at her quick summary. while she was no saint, drugs weren’t exactly something she went for often – it all depended on her company that night. and when it came to parties, most of the time they were all work-related. you could say they lived rather different lives. “i see. that’s definitely something press would have a field day with, so it’s good to know.” she quickly jotted down ‘parties + drugs’ in her notebook as a reminder to her future self. or, if she ever wanted to try something new, there was one other person she could approach. “in terms of your career, do you have any goals to reach within the next… two years? ideally we’d like to place editorial coverage around major events to really create an impact with the promotion. it’s always good to think ahead.” 

truly, odette hoped that didn’t make her look too bad. she also hoped it didn’t fare badly on her chances. while none of her bandmates were clean of their issues, she’d hate to be the downfall of them as a whole. she nodded. “i figured it would be,” she said honestly. she let out a sigh, running a hand through her hair. “i’d like to have a headlining tour. i’d like to get out another album. working with anyone that i can would be nice.”

[odettevalencia]

star-eyed-souls​:

“Yeah, actually,” he said, pulling his hand back. “I’m meeting up with some friends at a diner. After that, work.” He’s not immediately saying that he works on set, fetching coffees and actors that fell asleep in some corner. And he couldn’t quite pin down what Odette did. He’d let her talk first. “And you? Are you off somewhere too?”

“in that case, i won’t keep you!” she said, not wanting to be the reason he didn’t get to see his friends, especially if he had to work after that. she walked with him for the moment, though, to keep up the conversation. “i’m supposed to be meeting my bandmate, but she’ll wait,” odette explained with a laugh. 

[thecoldestbrew]

[odettevalencia]

star-eyed-souls​:

“Everybody thinks we’re supposed to think about our appearance,” Rose said, like they knew what they were talking about. “You’d think singers have more permission to look like themselves, but no. There’s still just as much to worry about performing live. And on T.V.” Rose put their head in their right hand. “Still, I’m thinking I wanna be on T.V. some day. And not in background roles either. I’m thinking a part where I get to speak. At the very least.”

they were right about that. and everyone had different ideas about what their appearances were supposed to look like. odette listened to a lot of what she was told, but there were some things she didn’t want to budge on. “you’d think. and if they want me to look a certain way, why don’t they just give me the clothes they want me to wear? no, i would hate that, too,” she said, shaking her head. “oh? like as a star of a television show?” she asked.

[odettevalencia]

fknjessie​:

                   ‟      living  for  applause  ,  it’s  a  wicked  mistress  we  endure  out  here  .        „        he  joked  ,  although  ,  it  wasn’t  all  that  far  off  .  at  times  it  was  hard  being  passionate  about  the  things  they  were  passionate  about  .  it  was  hard  being  in  the  business  they  were  in  .  hollywood  was  hard  ,  it  was  no  wonder  everyone  was  high  off  their  asses  .  it  was  the  only  way  to  get  through  the  day  .  either  because  you  weren’t  were  you  wanted  to  be  or  because  you  were   &   you  realized  it  was  a  lot  more  pressure  than  expected  .  either  way  ,  it  was  a  dog  eat  dog  world  .        ‟       please  ,  i’m  the  most  interesting  guy  you  know  .  you  know  i  could  spice  it  up  a  little  if  i  wanted  to  .        „       jessie  retorted  ,  seeing  it  more  as  a  challenge  than  anything  else  .           ‟        a  sick  joke  but  a  joke  nonetheless  .         „          taking  another  sip  of  his  minosa  ,  jessie  was  surprised  .  even  if  he           (             at  times  ,        )           put  off  the  vibe  that  nothing  phased  him  all  that  much  .  this  was  something  that  always  would  .  being  given  the  opportunity  to  play  his  music  in  front  of  a  new  crowd  ,  a  bigger  crowd  .          ‟         by  the  way  ,  the  answer  is  yes  .  my  band  would  love  to  open  for  yours  .       „

odette laughed, though it came out more bitter than it did joyful. it was odd, as she hadn’t intended for it to, but sometimes emotions took over like that. some days she wondered why she bothered with all of this in the first place, and she thought it was safe to say she wasn’t alone in those thoughts. “spice it up then! why would you hold out on me?” she teased, a slight smirk on her lips at the proposition. she nudged him under the table, shaking her head. “i’m not nearly that cruel. i resent that,” she teased. another laugh, this one lighter. “i figured your answer was yes, based on your reaction. we’ll have to get together and plan it out better, you know, when we aren’t drinking mimosas and enjoying a hedonistic morning.” 

[odettevalencia]

lydsparker​:

lydia appreciated the pick me up, it was nice to have a subtle push, not somebody hanging a deadline in front of her face or the condescending comments that came from the heads of the production companies. in all honesty nobody pushed lydia like she pushed herself, she wanted to be at the top or no where else. she made a promise to herself as a little girl to never let her past define her. anything was possible. “thank you” the woman said kindly, pressing her lips together in a soft smile. as odette began to recite the lines lydia listened carefully and took notes on where edits needed to be made. after one run through of the lines lydia excused herself to grab a bottle of wine that was inside “this is the only way we are going to get through this.” she said as she appeared again, pouring them both a glass before she sat back down. 

her words had an impact on lydia, odette could tell. that was part of why she enjoyed helping her. she realized that not everyone would be willing to offer any sorts of services for nothing in return, especially not in this business, but she was happy to help others. perhaps that was naive of her, but she wasn’t going to let this industry crush her spirit if it was the last thing she did. “you’re welcome,” she returned. she went on with lines, stopping when lydia excused herself. “you don’t have to ask me twice,” she said, picking up her glass and taking a drink. she set it down, running through the words again.

[odettevalencia]

star-eyed-souls​:

“There is?” As best he could, he reached behind his back to get something that must have been stuck on the middle of his shirt.

“That’s…” he brushed it off, finally. “… not dust. I don’t know what it was. Anyway…” he paused, giving himself a minute to breath. “I’m Joseph,” he said, sticking out his hand. “Nice to meet you.”

odette tentatively reached out a hand to help, but he seemed to have it handled. touching strangers wasn’t always bright, and this felt like a moment to keep her hands to herself. “well, then i’m extra glad you got it off!” she said, smiling at him. odette reached her hand out, shaking his. “nice to meet you, too! were you headed somewhere important?”

[ledger-heath]

[odettevalencia]

starletmades​:

             𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐄𝐍   𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐄   𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐒   𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐒𝐄   around   bare   shoulders   &&   the   beating   californian   sun   washes   over   freckled   features   .   ❛   ———    while   𝐈   𝐀𝐌   enjoying   this   frolic   in   the   sun   ,    ❜   hues   hidden   behind   designer   sunglasses   ,   she   offers   a   tilt   of   the   head   .   ❛   i   imagine   it’s   not   solely   because   you   revere   my   wit   .   ❜   hollywood   ,   is   if   nothing   else   ,   a   game   of   gentleman’s   agreements   and   favours   .   ❛   what   do   you   want   ,   &&   what   do   i   get   in   return   ?   ❜  

 ╰   ✩    𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐍   𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑   /   anyone   .

a stroll through the sun was one of odette’s favorite past times, that is when she was sober enough to enjoy it. a stroll with friends? why, she could only think of a few things that beat that. she didn’t know maria particularly well, but she considered her a friend of sorts, that was the truth. “is it a crime to appreciate some good company?” she asked with a laugh, turning her head to the other. “in return, you also get good company,” she added, winking at her.

[lunathesnake-deactivated2020110]

“Am I being stalked?” Joseph asked, joking. He loved catching people off their guard. It was a fun way to see how people reacted to the unexpected. In this case, the unexpected was a guy expecting to be stalked in broad daylight. Usually, only famous actresses dealt with that, or so he’d been told. “If you want a conversation, you can always just say ‘hello.’ I’m always open for business.”

[odettevalencia]

odette had decided to take a walk this morning, as she’d woken up in an incredible mood, and felt it’d be a waste not to. in fact, she was hoping she’d even run into a dog with an owner willing to spare a moment. but at some point during he walk, she’d noticed someone had a bit of something on the back of their shirt, and she wanted to let them know. she hadn’t quite found the right moment, until suddenly she was being spoken to. “oh! me? no, sorry,” she said with a laugh. “i was, uh. i just wanted you to know, i think you brushed up against something. your shirt is covered in, dust? i’m not sure,” she stumbled. “odette. my name is odette,” she introduced herself.

[ofminnie]

ah   ,   the  bustle  of  a  hollywood  bar  past  midnight   .   there  was  simply  nothing  like  it   .   for  minnie   ,   it  was  another  odd  job   .   she  just  finished  playing    ’   i’ve  never  been  in  love  before   ’   from  guys  &  dolls  for  what  seemed  to  be  the  fifth  time   .   she  gave  an  apologetic  glance  at  her  crooning  counterpart  before  turning  her  attention  to  the  person  who’d  been  against  her  piano  for  the  past  three  songs   .   “   ehem   .   ”   minnie  cleared  her  throat  and  looked  up  at  them   ,   feigning  concern   .   “   look   ,   baby   ,   it’s  either  you  request  a  song  and  leave  a  tip  if  you’re  feelin’  generous  or  you  pluck  up  the  courage  to  go  over  and  talk  to  that  little  cutie  at  the  bar  you’ve  been  eyein’  the  past  fifteen  minutes  for   .   ”

[odettevalencia]

hitting hollywood bars and not getting wasted was a real trick, but odette enjoyed the atmosphere and the music, and most of all, the people watching. she hadn’t realized how long she’d been in the pianist’s space until she spoke to her. she straightened up a bit and brushed herself off. “sorry! i get a bit caught up in it all. your playing was lovely. really. i could listen all day. do you ever step away, or is that not really allowed?” she asked curiously.

[odettevalencia]

lydsparker​:

lydia smiled softly to herself as odette complimented her work so far. it wasn’t that she always needed reassurance, but it was nice when it came from somebody who didn’t create movies for a living. “well then somebody else would step up and make the next big then. while i’m all for that, i can’t let myself not at least try.” the woman shrugged as she turned to face her friend more “i’m always working on a couple different things, whichever one i feel the most inspiration for at the time is usually how i decide which one is next.” she exhaled as she thought for a moment, the next words coming out quietly “i just can’t give them a reason to say i’m washed up and cut me out. as long as i continue to write quality content, they have to keep inviting me to the table.” 

that was fair. odette certainly wasn’t going to stand back and let someone else perform in her place. not if she had anything to say about it. “in that case, we better get to work,” she grinned. she nodded. that made sense. honestly, it wasn’t all too different than her own writing. different subject material, different formatting, but writing happened when writing happened. “sounds familiar,” she said. as the next words stumbled from lydia’s mouth, she stepped forward, putting her finger square in her chest. “none of that talk. washed up? no. i will accept none of that. you are far from washed out, and you will be invited to the table as long as you live,” she said, pulling the script in front of her face and beginning to recite the lines lydia had written. 

[odettevalencia]

fknjessie​:

                     ‟       i  feed  off  applause   ,  i  can’t  help  it  .  it’s  in  my  nature  .        „        &   in  a  way  that  was  actually  completely  false  but  always  completely   &   utterly  ,  true  .  but  he  was  a  musician  ,  a  performer  ,  it  came  with  the  position  .        ⏤      nevertheless  ,  he  was  enjoying  this  ,  it  was  rare  you  meet  someone  like  odette  that  was  as  down  to  earth  as  she  was  ,  as  free  as  she  seemed  to  be  ,  as  lively  .  she  didn’t  shy  away  from  what  she  wanted  ,  it  was  admirable  .   plus  ,  he  liked  that  their  high  energies  worked  off  each  other  .  they  were  able  to  get  along  well  because  of  it  .  they  were  able  to  feed  off  each  other   &   encourage  the  things  some  might  think  were  questionable  .  it  made  for  more  exciting  twists   &   turns  .         ‟        i’ll  make  you  a  deal  ,       „         he  began  ,  leaning  his  arms  against  the  table  as  he  leaned  forward  .         ‟         i’ll  sneak  you  out  if  you  supply  the  booze  .       „          smiling  ,  he  leaned  back  in  his  chair  once  again  .  pulling  his  sunglasses  up    &   resting  them  on  the  top  of  his  head  .          ‟        wait  ,  are  you  serious   ?   you  want  me  to  open  for  you   ?        „          jessie  didn’t  ask  for  much  from  odette  because  he  genuinely  respected  their  friendship  but  he’d  be  a  liar  if  he  said  her  offer  didn’t  get  him  excited  .         ‟        are  you  fucking  kidding   ?   of  course  i’d  want  to  open  for  this  future  gig  you’re  talking  about   .         „

odette scoffed, rolling her eyes playfully. “join the club, jessie,” she teased. was there a single performer in the world who didn’t thrive off of positive feedback, or any feedback, for that matter? she’d yet to meet one. odette mimicked him, leaning in, her arm on the table. “oh, here i thought your deal would be a bit more interesting than that. i’m pretty sure i supply the booze most times anyway,” she teased, leaning back again. she looked up, amazed at how surprised he was. “yeah, m’serious. what kinda sick fucking joke would that be?” she said with a laugh. she nodded again. “great! i think you’ll be perfect for it. and i’d love to have you there.”

[odettevalencia]

star-eyed-souls​:.

“I mean, I think you look fine.” Odette can see right through you, Rosie. In this case, Odette could likely see that Rose was settling back into their meek habits. That is, appeasement. “But, if your manager really thinks so, then… what did your manager say, anyway?”

a single eyebrow cocked at the tone coming from rosie’s voice. “oh, thank you. i’m so glad i look fine,” she repeated. she let out a sigh, running her hand through her hair. “just that, i focus too little on my appearance. funny that, because i didn’t know my clothes and hair affected how my music sounded, but i guess my opinion means shit,” she explained to them, turning, her hands on her hips. “this isn’t what i envisioned,” she added, a bit dejected.

[odettevalencia]

jameswt​:

             “  mhm ,  ”   he  hums  unsatisfied  by  the  answer  she  gave.    “  that’s  what  they  always  say .  ”    he  hoped  she  didn’t  take  it  personally.  he meant no offence with the way he was acting  ,  ever  since  the  image  of  his  first  wife  had  haunted  him  in  the  form  of  an  uprising  starlet  ,  he’d  been  in  a  dreary  mood  .

“on the contrary,” she began, “i don’t really watch films. the whole focusing thing? not really my thing. but this one,” she said, putting her hand down on the script. “this one is good. run with it, i’d say. not that you seem to care for what i have to say. which begs the question, why are you bothering to ask?”