"I am no longer the winter soldier."
"I'm James Buchanan Barnes, and you, are a part of my efforts to make amends."
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@official-james-b
"I am no longer the winter soldier."
"I'm James Buchanan Barnes, and you, are a part of my efforts to make amends."
- Check out my Variants.
- Family.
dad . . I ' m 16 now . It ' s been a rough time . I met someone , dad . I loved them like no one else for six months , and then they broke it off . Three weeks ago , i think . and fuck , i miss them so much . . my birthday was kinda shit . . i got an rifle though ! mama ' s gonna show me how to shoot . that ' s pretty awesome .
Smiles, pulling the kid into a gentle hug.
"That's right, can't wait to see you handle it like a champ..."
He chuckles, then rocks them in the hug.
"How's your health been, hmm?"
Deyanira sniffled as she walked into the house.
Collapsing onto the couch she grabbed a blanket and passed out. Waking up in the evening.
She slowly got up, walking towards the kitchen for something to eat or drink only to see Bucky.
"hi" she said her voice hoarse.
Yup she was definitely sick. She thought it was just a few sneezes and sleep deprivation but nope. She was sick.
She hated being sick. Her brain felt like mush. Her projects sat untouched. And the fact that before, when she couldn't afford basic healthcare, being sick -even a simple cold- meant worse than what it meant for most.
Also it was just plain annoying.
She groaned, taking some water, she had dragged the blanket with her and she looked at Bucky, "don't look at me like that. I'm not sick"
She was definitely sick.
"I could run a marathon"
She could barely stand.
"The shivering is part of an experiment"
Hell even she knew that didn't make sense.
"Also is that dinner?"
Her mind flew off course easily at the sight of Bucky's cooking.
@cursed-with-knowledge
He sighed, tossing wagyu around in the pan, sounds of gentle sizzling and a scent of rosemary, then snapping his fingers, starting to point around.
"Paracetamol."
He said, pointing to the pills that sat by the water flask. Then again, towards the heating pad.
"Place it on your head."
Then....paused.
"...Do you feel like having dinner yet... or do you feel the need to rest some more...?"
The statement was flat. Should've been. Should've landed like a commercial inquiry but it didn't. It wasn't stern. How could it be? Not when...he cared much more.
She took the medicine, drinking some water. She then took the cool pack and placed it on her head keeping it there with one hand and using the other to keep the blanket around her.
She no longer wanted to lay down, instead her eyes were on Bucky's cooking, "I'm starving but my throat hurts so I dont want to eat but I also really wanna eat whatever you're making because it smells so good" she says, watching over his shoulder.
"Why is life so hard? Why do choices exist? Why do we feeble humans have to be punished by this sickness" she complained.
Apparently being sick made her dramatic.
"I've broken bones and I'd rather do that again than be sick any longer. You understand how annoying this is? At least with a broken keg I could still work. I can't even think right now everything hurts" she whined.
And apparently being sick also made her a lot more talkative.
He sighed, as he began plating her food, speaking as he did.
"....Well, doll, part of reason why we're all human is because, first, well...sensory identification. This throat ache...and all of it...it's going to dissolve and now that I know, I think the pills are going to help, just...lay down some more..."
He said, continued to plate it.
"I'm putting it so that it stays warmer for long."
Then, exhaled, rotating his arm around for a gentle settling. It was a little habit that grew on him, now.
He exhaled, sitting down by her, after a quite, contemplating glance down at his hands.
"...Like is hard because that's what gives it meaning, choices...exist to make us known of the value of knowing what we want, and sickness exists because that's what makes us value our times of well-being, kid...we often take a lot of that for granted...exhaust ourselves as if it works like a machine..."
He answered, patient. When did he grow into patience?
"....We want none of that bone breaking shit, you hear me, kid? And this...dying victorian child syndrome is acting up...it'll pass, alright...? You..."
He exhaled, swallowed thickly, then,
"....You have me, you know."
She felt her throat tighten. Damn it the sickness was going to make her cry.
It definitely wasn't what Bucky just said. Definitely wasn't the fact that it was the first time she heard those words. That she could hear the truth behind them. All the while she could smell the warm food made with love and care.
Damn it. Don't cry.
She quickly wiped one tear, "I'm not crying I'm just sick" she sniffles, before he can say anything.
She looked at her plate, "thank you for the food" she says.
She pauses. No. She wanted to say more. She wanted him to know. She takes a deep breath and turns to Bucky
"And also thank you for everything and so much more" she got out, "I'm not really good at putting it into words but thank you because that's all I can say to express how grateful I am"
She watched his expression carefully, any sign that she should stop. When she didn't find it she continued.
"I'm really happy. And I mean the room here is great, the food is amazing and having a place to come to is comforting but it's more than that. It's you. I don't know how to describe it but for the first time I feel so full" she admitted.
So full of all the things she never experienced or thought would know. It was a feeling so new.
Having someone care for her. Having a place that was safe. And maybe she wouldn't be admitting this if she was in the right state of mind and thinking clearly but it was the truth.
"...Alright, come,"
He exhales, putting his arm around her shoulders and rubbing down it slowly. She was warm with a fever, it seemed.
"...You don't have to talk, don't force it, it's all...okay..."
He said, letting her lay against his chest for a long few minutes, the only sound around being the quite ticking of the grandfather clock by the showcase, quiet breathing, hers and his own.
Then, quietly,
"...Close your eyes...have no fear, the monster's gone...he's on the run, and your daddy's here...beautiful, beautiful, beautiful...beautiful girl..."
Deyanira sniffled as she walked into the house.
Collapsing onto the couch she grabbed a blanket and passed out. Waking up in the evening.
She slowly got up, walking towards the kitchen for something to eat or drink only to see Bucky.
"hi" she said her voice hoarse.
Yup she was definitely sick. She thought it was just a few sneezes and sleep deprivation but nope. She was sick.
She hated being sick. Her brain felt like mush. Her projects sat untouched. And the fact that before, when she couldn't afford basic healthcare, being sick -even a simple cold- meant worse than what it meant for most.
Also it was just plain annoying.
She groaned, taking some water, she had dragged the blanket with her and she looked at Bucky, "don't look at me like that. I'm not sick"
She was definitely sick.
"I could run a marathon"
She could barely stand.
"The shivering is part of an experiment"
Hell even she knew that didn't make sense.
"Also is that dinner?"
Her mind flew off course easily at the sight of Bucky's cooking.
@cursed-with-knowledge
He sighed, tossing wagyu around in the pan, sounds of gentle sizzling and a scent of rosemary, then snapping his fingers, starting to point around.
"Paracetamol."
He said, pointing to the pills that sat by the water flask. Then again, towards the heating pad.
"Place it on your head."
Then....paused.
"...Do you feel like having dinner yet... or do you feel the need to rest some more...?"
The statement was flat. Should've been. Should've landed like a commercial inquiry but it didn't. It wasn't stern. How could it be? Not when...he cared much more.
She took the medicine, drinking some water. She then took the cool pack and placed it on her head keeping it there with one hand and using the other to keep the blanket around her.
She no longer wanted to lay down, instead her eyes were on Bucky's cooking, "I'm starving but my throat hurts so I dont want to eat but I also really wanna eat whatever you're making because it smells so good" she says, watching over his shoulder.
"Why is life so hard? Why do choices exist? Why do we feeble humans have to be punished by this sickness" she complained.
Apparently being sick made her dramatic.
"I've broken bones and I'd rather do that again than be sick any longer. You understand how annoying this is? At least with a broken keg I could still work. I can't even think right now everything hurts" she whined.
And apparently being sick also made her a lot more talkative.
He sighed, as he began plating her food, speaking as he did.
"....Well, doll, part of reason why we're all human is because, first, well...sensory identification. This throat ache...and all of it...it's going to dissolve and now that I know, I think the pills are going to help, just...lay down some more..."
He said, continued to plate it.
"I'm putting it so that it stays warmer for long."
Then, exhaled, rotating his arm around for a gentle settling. It was a little habit that grew on him, now.
He exhaled, sitting down by her, after a quite, contemplating glance down at his hands.
"...Like is hard because that's what gives it meaning, choices...exist to make us known of the value of knowing what we want, and sickness exists because that's what makes us value our times of well-being, kid...we often take a lot of that for granted...exhaust ourselves as if it works like a machine..."
He answered, patient. When did he grow into patience?
"....We want none of that bone breaking shit, you hear me, kid? And this...dying victorian child syndrome is acting up...it'll pass, alright...? You..."
He exhaled, swallowed thickly, then,
"....You have me, you know."
Deyanira sniffled as she walked into the house.
Collapsing onto the couch she grabbed a blanket and passed out. Waking up in the evening.
She slowly got up, walking towards the kitchen for something to eat or drink only to see Bucky.
"hi" she said her voice hoarse.
Yup she was definitely sick. She thought it was just a few sneezes and sleep deprivation but nope. She was sick.
She hated being sick. Her brain felt like mush. Her projects sat untouched. And the fact that before, when she couldn't afford basic healthcare, being sick -even a simple cold- meant worse than what it meant for most.
Also it was just plain annoying.
She groaned, taking some water, she had dragged the blanket with her and she looked at Bucky, "don't look at me like that. I'm not sick"
She was definitely sick.
"I could run a marathon"
She could barely stand.
"The shivering is part of an experiment"
Hell even she knew that didn't make sense.
"Also is that dinner?"
Her mind flew off course easily at the sight of Bucky's cooking.
@cursed-with-knowledge
He sighed, tossing wagyu around in the pan, sounds of gentle sizzling and a scent of rosemary, then snapping his fingers, starting to point around.
"Paracetamol."
He said, pointing to the pills that sat by the water flask. Then again, towards the heating pad.
"Place it on your head."
Then....paused.
"...Do you feel like having dinner yet... or do you feel the need to rest some more...?"
The statement was flat. Should've been. Should've landed like a commercial inquiry but it didn't. It wasn't stern. How could it be? Not when...he cared much more.
Hello, me..... God, this universe thing is confusing...
@jamesbarnesss
"...Oh man."
Sighs, turns, then reluctantly lets the gauge fall from his hand and clatter to the floor.
"There's...another one?"
Hey dad !!!! I'm on day 20 of NNB today, which means I'm gonna be on three weeks tomorrow!! Half way through my goal <33
I'm going open evening for the year sixes at my high school tomorrow!! I'm gonna help out with forest club, where we get to make smores !!!! and wear our own clothes. !!! 😱😱 I'm really really excited !! I'm also going for my braces fixed again,, cause school shuts at 1;20 instead of three !!! :33
I hope . . know you're proud of me. And I think the fact that I'm so confident of it is really beautiful<3
Lots of love,
- Icarus / Nate <3
ps. I'm in year 11 now, with prelim exams and mocks right around the corner. . I'm a little nervous, but I'm confident I can do it. As long as when it comes time for my exams, I don't run up and down the hall and slap everyone, I'm calling it a win.
Hey, Icarus.
Twenty days, huh? That’s huge, kid. You’re doing real good, and I am proud of you. Proud enough to shout it from a rooftop if I didn’t think the neighbors would call someone.
Open evening sounds fun, forest club, s’mores, your own clothes? You’re gonna be the coolest one there, no question. Don’t burn the marshmallows too much, though, that’s rookie stuff.
Braces’ll be over before you know it. Trust me, metal in your mouth’s a lot better than metal in your arm.
As for the exams, nerves just mean you care. You’ll do great. And if you do end up slapping people in the hall… just make sure it’s for motivational purposes.
I am proud of you, Nate. Always have been. Always will be.
— Dad.
Hey, dad. I just want you to know that whenever I listen to Mac DeMacro (specifically Heart to Heart + For the first time) I think about the Barnes kids roleplay and that shit warms my soul up so good
I love you so much, and I miss you <3
"I miss you too, bub. And I'm right here, now. I love you."
Dad, ! Hii <3
Guess what? :3
I'm three weeks clean from biting my nails !!! :DD
I'm really proud of myself, it's took a lot of self restraint to get this far <3
"I love you too, bub. You know that. And I'm so proud of you too. I really home those numbers will rise and who knows, maybe we could actually start celebrating the weeks?"
DAD!!!
IM SO HAPPY THEY'RE SO LONG AND I CAN FEEL THWJ WHEN I SCRATCH MYSELF IN THE SHOWER WHEN KY HANDS ARE WET WHERE I USUALLY WOILD JUST BE LEFT SITH AN ITCH :33
Pancake flips and it gently sizzles inside the pan, he places the pan down and wipes at his apron.
"And, I am indeed proud of that too. Tell me, maple syrup or strawberry and whipped cream?"
You are dad material. *latches on to you*
"Oh- okay- I have...yes, three children, I think. I might just be-"
Blinks, holds them, and slowly presses cheek into their head.
Father, I hath consumed a tide pod
"Nana, you ate what, now-"
Deyanira smiled nervously when she saw Bucky on the couch.
She walked over placing the box of cookies on the table, "hey" she said, taking a seat.
This time though she seemed more open. Whether it was the clothes that were newer and no longer chosen deliberately to hide her arm or if it was the way she sat facing Bucky, legs crossed and no longer did she sir at the farthest edge of the couch.
"I brought cookies" she smiled, "I didn't make them because I doubt getting poisoned halfway through our conversation would be ideal" she joked.
"I wanted to talk" she finally says, "not about anything specific. We just haven't gotten to talk alone and I know that's mostly because of me but if you're free...."
"I'd love to get to know my adoptive guardian more" " she smiled, tapping her leg nervously.
Was hoping for fluff with jokes and hugs if you're up to it
- @cursed-with-knowledge
He hadn’t expected company. Hell, he hadn’t expected her. Not like this, shoulders not as tightly wound, no hoodie sleeves pulled long to cover trembling hands, no seat taken like she was always on the verge of flight.
When Deyanira walked in, Bucky’s first instinct was to brace, old habits, but instead, he just blinked, watching her set the box down like it was some sort of peace offering.
“Hey…”
He sat up straighter. His eyes flicked down to the cookies, then to her, really looking. The newer clothes, the missing weight in her posture, the nervous but deliberate way she faced him. It knocked something loose in his chest. The kind of thing he didn’t have a name for, but it ached in the best way.
He let out a quiet laugh at her poison joke, short, surprised, real.
“Guess that’s a smart move. Would’ve made things real awkward halfway through me complimenting the chocolate chips.”
The words landed soft, but the impact was seismic. It caught him mid-breath. For a second, Bucky just looked at her. Not with pity. Not with worry. But with this stunned, quiet warmth, like someone who’d just been handed a fragile gift they didn’t think they deserved.
He shook his head a little, the corner of his mouth twitching into something half smile, half disbelief. His voice came lower now, softer.
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m free.”
He gestured loosely at the empty space beside him.
“I’d love that too. Getting to know each other... sounds better than most things I do in a day.”
“And for the record? You showing up like this… it means more than you probably think.”
She smiled, "hey I'm not that bad" she huffed.
She felt like her heart was going to jump out of her chest. For no reason she felt nervous, not because she thought
She plots down, "good. Because I will admit I did a load worth of research on you when we first met. In the least creepy way, if there is one"
"But I doubt that counts as "getting to know each other" at least not how someone is supposed to know the person whose house they live in" she smiles, "or whose food they can't get enough of"
It was true. Jeez she loved his cooking. She had a metal chart of what bucky was most likely to make for dinner. And she visited accordingly.
She listens and slowly nods, "I'm glad. Honestly I was worried, even though technically I knew it won't be a problem"
"I mean you've been great, amazing in every aspect and I've just kinda been me" she shrugged, giving him a knowing look.
She hadn't really been the most accepting or even welcoming.
"But I'm happy you're open to this. And since I suck at socializing you start" she said, crossing her legs and looking at him.
"Whatever you wanna tell or ask or think we should do"
He leaned back in his chair, watching her with that quiet, steady gaze of his, the kind that made you feel like he could see more than you were saying. One corner of his mouth twitched up into something between a smirk and a smile.
“Alright,” he said, voice low, almost amused. “Guess I can work with that.”
His fingers drummed idly on the armrest before he tilted his head, considering her. “But fair warning, when I start, I don’t half-ass it.”
There was a glint in his eyes, not exactly a challenge, but something close enough to make her heartbeat stutter again. He shifted forward, forearms resting on his knees now, like he was about to close the distance.
Hey, dad.
I bit my nails :(
But it's all okay, y'know? Cause they'll grow back, and I'll get older, and I'll find new coping mechanisms. It'll all work out.
I love you, dad.
And I really appreciate (both) you (and mun. Hi Raani. I appreciate you so much, and I'm really proud of you <3).
I hope you know that <3
- Your favourite kiddo, @3thereality
"...Exactly, baby. See? You're learning. And I'm proud of you. I hope you ate, yeah? Love you too."
(both of us love you, nate.)
Mrow!
- @meow-central
"...Well, hello there?"
SAM! Use this against Bucky... I wasn't here!
@ancient-siren
*sam smiles slowly*
@the-winter-stoner-blog @white-wolf-actually @iwasmadetobeasoldier @official-james-b @officialwinterssoldier @white-wolf-winter-soldier @jamesbbuchnanb @that-metal-arm-soldier @buchnanbarnes @armed-and-dangerousx @brooklyn-bucky @therealbuckybarnes @ifucksteverogers @that-metal-arm-soldier @buckyofficialbarnes @buckybuck-barnes @official-buckybarnes
OH BUCKYYYYYYYYYYYY
Sighs.
Digital footprint is something I despise about this era of technology.
meow~
BUCKY??!! /silly @'s below cut
@official-buckybarnes @the-revolution-is-here @revolt-against-control @justawhitewolf @justjamesbarnes @official-james-b
Oh, what is this...a catboy fantasy of me?