Tamlin

High lord of the Spring Court | Avid gardener | shapeshifter | 512 | currently residing in my court manor | parody account, stans dni

[huntathalarofficial]

So, @officialtamlin … 

I hear you were Fae Boy’s first employer. I hear you are Fae Boy’s very good friend. 

[officialtamlin]

And so?

[huntathalarofficial]

Nothing. But I think I may genuinely like Fae Boy very much, and so I should probably get in good with his friends. 

Also, since my last employer is dead and because Bryce and I broke up so I can’t squat in her apartment, I kind of need a new place to stay.

What do you say to us becoming roomies? 

[officialtamlin]

I will allow it if you can convince me. I finally have a functioning court, why should I let strangers in?

[huntathalarofficial]

Because isolationism is a bad strategy in the long run. The only way any country can truly prosper is by letting outsiders in. Many people, including yourself, have offered shelter to strangers and it pays great dividends for them. 

The queen and king in Terrasen let Fae Boy into the country, and from what I hear he’s proven to be an excellent administrator. And according to Fae Boy himself, when you let FEYRE in she saved your entire damned court from an evil witch. 

And of course, Fae Boy himself was from a different court originally. And I imagine he must have been pretty damn useful to you too. 

I myself have many assets a High Lord like yourself might be in need of. I can fight pretty damn well if I do say so myself, and before I was a slave I was a GENERAL. The lead general of all Shahar’s armies. 

And since Prythian finds itself at war so often it never hurts to have extra officers around, does it?  Not that YOU plan on going to war, but there is always the possibility that war might get declared…

Think about that for a while. 

[officialbrycequinlan]

Stop pretending you care about anything except your dick hunt. Run along now.

[officialqueenaelinashryver]

🙄

[huntathalarofficial]

Well, I CERTAINLY don’t care about YOU, @officialbrycequinlan . 

And I would think you’d have better things to do than stalk your ex on tumblr like this. Like, mind your own business, please.  This has fuck-all to do with you, Bryce Quinlan.

[officialbrycequinlan]

No, lol, you were featured in that dating program on tv. Idgaf about u

‘Ex’ - you’re flattering yourself, you worthless pig! We never dated and you were never my ex.

[huntathalarofficial]

“We never dated”

True. Very true. You were more of a dumb annoyance that Micah Domitus forced me to bodyguard. An annoyance which I also decided to have sex with for some strange reason. Maybe I was desperate. Or lonely. Or experiencing a temporary fit of insanity. 

[officialbrycequinlan]

pfft sex? in your dreams, a-hole. 

stop whining already, this is pathetic. 

[officialqueenaelinashryver]

#athlarstopembarrasingyourselfchallenge

🙄 

[huntathalarofficial]

I am not the one who crawled into her private business, Your Majesty. She is the one who interrupted my private conversation with Tamlin to trash me. 

I have not so much as been within five miles of her since I left her apartment. I have been doing my damn best to leave Bryce alone and move on with my life. 

She is the one who started this, NOT me. 

But of course you’re going to take her side. Never mind that if I was interrupting her private conversations with potential landlords just to trash her in front of them, y’all would rip me a new one. 

You’d call me an abusive piece of shit and a stalker if I did that. You’d tell me to get a fucking life. You’d ask me why the fuck I can’t leave Bryce alone. 

 But since Bryce is female, I guess her behavior is just “cute LOL” . That her mocking me for finding a new place to stay and attempts to sabotage me as I find a new home are just “LOL! Bryce is a savage!” 

No, Bryce is female, so it can’t be harmful in the slightest for her to do that! 

It can’t feel invasive, or creepy, or irritating, or anything bad, because Bryce is a girl! Girls can’t do anything bad!  

I have done EVERYTHING in my power to move on. I moved out without so much as a WORD of protest; gathered my things and left. I have let them have their space because that’s what you DO after a relationship ends. I’m not saying this to make you feel sympathetic. You’re supposed to do those things. 

Whereas Bryce on the other hand walks into my private life and tries to sabotage my attempts to find a home. She showed up, uninvited, not wanted, to wreck my business, Your Majesty. 

[officialtamlin]

I see you might not have seen my response, but it is no, unfortunately. I wish you the best for your search of a place to live. 

Also mod: Please remember that this is just a game not to be taken too seriously, and most of us are not really active in the parody game anymore as we have other commitments now. Also, nothing is meant to be an insult to any mods, we’re all just making fun of the characters. 

[officialtamlin]

do you and elain have a yt channel for gardening tips?

Elain and I are not in contact at the moment, so no.

[officialtamlin]

what are your plans for autumn when flower growth is the worst?

Spring court. Spring court.

[officialtamlin]

i like your flowers, pretty

Thank you, anonymous.

[huntathalarofficial]

So, @officialtamlin … 

I hear you were Fae Boy’s first employer. I hear you are Fae Boy’s very good friend. 

[officialtamlin]

And so?

[huntathalarofficial]

Nothing. But I think I may genuinely like Fae Boy very much, and so I should probably get in good with his friends. 

Also, since my last employer is dead and because Bryce and I broke up so I can’t squat in her apartment, I kind of need a new place to stay.

What do you say to us becoming roomies? 

[officialtamlin]

I will allow it if you can convince me. I finally have a functioning court, why should I let strangers in?

[huntathalarofficial]

Because isolationism is a bad strategy in the long run. The only way any country can truly prosper is by letting outsiders in. Many people, including yourself, have offered shelter to strangers and it pays great dividends for them. 

The queen and king in Terrasen let Fae Boy into the country, and from what I hear he’s proven to be an excellent administrator. And according to Fae Boy himself, when you let FEYRE in she saved your entire damned court from an evil witch. 

And of course, Fae Boy himself was from a different court originally. And I imagine he must have been pretty damn useful to you too. 

I myself have many assets a High Lord like yourself might be in need of. I can fight pretty damn well if I do say so myself, and before I was a slave I was a GENERAL. The lead general of all Shahar’s armies. 

And since Prythian finds itself at war so often it never hurts to have extra officers around, does it?  Not that YOU plan on going to war, but there is always the possibility that war might get declared…

Think about that for a while. 

[officialtamlin]

Thank you, next.

[huntathalarofficial]

So, @officialtamlin … 

I hear you were Fae Boy’s first employer. I hear you are Fae Boy’s very good friend. 

[officialtamlin]

And so?

[huntathalarofficial]

Nothing. But I think I may genuinely like Fae Boy very much, and so I should probably get in good with his friends. 

Also, since my last employer is dead and because Bryce and I broke up so I can’t squat in her apartment, I kind of need a new place to stay.

What do you say to us becoming roomies? 

[officialtamlin]

I will allow it if you can convince me. I finally have a functioning court, why should I let strangers in?

[huntathalarofficial]

So, @officialtamlin … 

I hear you were Fae Boy’s first employer. I hear you are Fae Boy’s very good friend. 

[officialtamlin]

And so?

[officialtamlin]

Did you hear that @officiallucienvanserra and @huntathalarofficial are on a date?

Yes i did, good for them 😌😌.

[officialtamlin]

Anon I would strongly discourage you from attempting to start any drama, we are all very tired 😔

[officialtamlin]

Did you hear that @officiallucienvanserra and @huntathalarofficial are on a date?

Yes i did, good for them 😌😌.

But what @officiallucienvanserra wishes to do in his spare time has nothing to with me.

[amrenofficial]

Today has been an eventful day. Now, as things stand:

@lucienvanserraofficial has been located , and is now safe.

@lysandraashryverofficial and @miryamofficial successfully defeated the demon.

@spymasterazrielofficial and I make a good team.

However, the night court as a whole and especially Velaris is in disarray, houses have been destroyed, the “Palace of Bone and Salt” is destroyed, Rhysand and Feyre’s Sidra Estate has been destroyed, the Rainbow is in ruins, citizens are displaced and injured, some are in the Hewn City, and as of now @officialhighlordrhys and @officialfeyredarling are nowhere to be found.

[officialhighlordrhys]

For we are in the Cabin, Amren darling. 

[officialqueenaelinashryver]

WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS IN THE CABIN IF YOU OWN MORE THAN 3 HOUSES? WHY DO YOU IDIOTS NOT FUCK IN THE COMFORT OF THOSE THREE MANSIONS?

[amrenofficial]

Well.. I do think those three houses have been destroyed by now. The cabin too, actually. I’m not sure what the state of Velaris is anymore, after the last attack I have gone on on a much needed holiday.

[officialqueenaelinashryver]

So … They are back to fucking in the sky 😒

[officiallucienvanserra]

Wait WHAT?!!!!  👀

HOW?!!! WHEN?!!!

[officiallucienvanserra]

Your Majesty please explain this to me!!! 

WHY are they making love in the sky? 

[officialtamlin]

I have no idea.

[officiallucienvanserra]

so @officialtamlin​ it occurs to me that I have yet to show you pictures from when I went to California. 

So this is a mug of hot chocolate I ordered. 

And here are those beetle-shaped horseless carriages I was telling Jurian about. A whole fleet of them, actually. 

And HERE is a wonder known to the mortals of California as a “movie theater”. It has these screens which depict stories told via an endless cycle of pictures that move and talk. 

[officialtamlin]

Seems like a most interesting land. Glad you had fun, Lucien.

[officialtamlin]

Tamlin Returns

Dear all,

I have taken a break off tumblr.com to try to put my court to rights. I am now pleased to inform you all that all any civilians that previously found themselves without homes have now had houses rebuilt for them. There are no longer any food shortages; the fields that were destroyed have now been replanted and reinforced. I have abolished the tithe, there is no need for such things. There is absolute trust and harmony within my court, and the sun shines on us all.

I hope you have all been well, especially you, @lucienvanserraofficial , I heard you’ve been through a lot lately. I do hope that you are happy where you are now. I hope we can all be friends now, since I have returned a sincere and changed person.

Thank you,

High Lord Tamlin.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*hearts beats wildly*

I...am fine, Tamlin. I...was recently captured and imprisoned by a demon while on vacation, but that demon is now dead, thanks to Queen Miryam of Cretea. 

The Night Court is, unfortunately, rather in disarray.  The...demon that captured me also decided to set much of the city of Velaris on fire. 

Would you...like to come to tea with me, perhaps? In Orynth? 

[officialtamlin]

Lucien! I am so sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better soon.

That’s a shame, about the night court. I’m sure Rhysand has it all under his control, right?

Tea with you sounds delightful, name the date and time and I shall be there.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Tommorrow. At two.

And as to your question about Rhysand...😂😂🤣 

No. No he does not. What he was doing while Velaris burned...do you want to know what he was doing while Velaris burned?!!!

[officialtamlin]

Tomorrow at two it is.

And why yes, I am curious. What was he doing while Velaris burnt? 🤔

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Having sex. With Feyre. 

[officialtamlin]

Ah. I would say I’m surprised but I am not. Nevertheless, I wish them all the best.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*gasps* Sorry I’m late, Tamlin. Come-right this way-into my quarters. Tea has already been poured. 

[officialtamlin]

Why thank you, Lucien. This tea smells delicious. How have things been lately, are you recovered?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*sighs* Yes and no. 

I am feeling better since the days of Fienerei. However, just thinking about all that we have to do now makes my head hurt!

Plus, the queen and queen consort almost left me believing that NOW, after TWO demon attacks, one of which has caused a nascent revolution in the Night Court, is the best time to leave and hope that democracy is implemented! 

I BARELY managed to convince the royal couple to stay, and now Her Majesty is pissed at me. Which is understandable, considering all they’ve been through, but still. 

And of all things, that horrid @officialbrycequinlan​ woman tried to offer them drugs. AGAIN. Even though Her Majesty taking drugs was THE REASON the queen consort left and got kidnapped by Fienerei, STARTING this whole mess. 

And the other court members don’t do much work, so thus everything is the responsibility of me and the royal couple. 

[officialtamlin]

Oh dear. That sounds like too much work for you, Lucien, you seem rather overworked. Have you considered taking a break, and staying safe during it too?

Unfortunate about the drug situation, I have no suggestions as to how to proceed there. I really have no idea how to assist in any of this, but be assured I will do whatever I can to ease your burden. 

Would you ever consider visiting the Spring Court? 

[lucienvanserraofficial]

I would love to, but...all this was caused in part thanks to the LAST time I took a vacation. 

[officialtamlin]

I can promise you would be safe here, but it is up to you.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*beams* You are in luck, Tamlin. I have been instructed to keep an eye on the rulers of Prythian for now. 

I suspect this is Her Majesty getting me out of the way, but-who cares? 

As soon as I have reported on the damage in the Night Court to my queen, I am coming straight over to the Spring Court for a visit. 

[officialtamlin]

I look forward to receiving you! As you shall see, the Spring Court has been much improved in your absence.

But oh dear, what is going on in the Night Court??

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*pours Tamlin some more tea*

Nothing short of a full revolution. The people of Velaris are...not pleased with the way their rulers handled the demon.  They are, in fact, attempting to storm the Cabin as we speak. 

Amren tried to fix the crisis somewhat, but that only allowed the revolutionaries to focus solely on Rhysand. Given their....anger at Rhysand, Amren saw which way the wind was blowing and thus officially left the Night Court for good, it seems. Which... seems to mean that the Inner Circle is dismantled for good. 

Now, normally, deposing Rhysand could only be a good thing, bu  I worry that some opportunists in the Hewn City might try and take advantage of the revolution for their own gain. 

I do long to see what you have done with the Spring Court in my absence. Mother knows I could stand to see a court that functions properly. Not to speak ill of my King and Queen-they do a MUCH better job than Rhysand even on their worst days-but two demons in one go are not an easy task to deal with for any ruler-especially ones still in recovery from demonic possession. 

[lysandraashryverofficial]

Not to crash your date, but bro do you want to fucking go? Do you wanna fight dude because let’s fight. Also get your facts straight. Your irresponsibility when selected where to have your vacation and your own disregard for the safety policy you put in place is why there was note/record of a second demon attack in the first place! Which we took care of without any damages to Terrasen! As for the first attack, nobody knew the demons were even here until Fienerei showed up!

I am speechless.

[officialtamlin]

Now now, please no fighting on my post.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

There will be no fighting, Tamlin.  As you know, my mother did not raise me to be such a crass, crude individual as to engage in fisticuffs at the drop of a hat.  Let alone engage in fisticuffs with my superiors. 

Now, hurry back to the Spring Court. I have already arrived, and I do not see why you should sit there and have one of my sovereigns vent her anger on you. 

[officialtamlin]

I am here Lucien.

Perhaps you should indeed “quit while you’re ahead”, as they say. Come work for me, I dare say you’ll be much happier here. Now, a tour?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Oh, I already HAVE, believe me. If Their Majesties The King and Queen cannot take criticism from their loyal servants, they do not deserve to HAVE loyal servants. 

And yes. A tour sounds lovely. 

[officiallucienvanserra]

Sorry about that. I am back now, Tamlin. So how about that tour of the Spring Court? 

[officialtamlin]

Sure thing, Lucien. Follow me, we’ll start with the rose gardens...

[officiallucienvanserra]

There are MULTIPLE rose gardens now?!

[officialtamlin]

Why yes. Did I forget to mention? Gardening is a hobby of mine, now. 😊

[officiallucienvanserra]

Oh, I think you have mentioned your new hobby before, but I am impressed with how you’ve extended the rose gardens, truly. 

[officialtamlin]

Why thank you, Lucien. I am glad you approve. What would you like to see next?

[officiallucienvanserra]

The Great Hall. 

[officialtamlin]

Yes of course. Follow me...

The hall has been rebuilt in a more modern style, see? It is also safer now, and has improved from a strategic point of view.

[officialtamlin]

Tamlin Returns

Dear all,

I have taken a break off tumblr.com to try to put my court to rights. I am now pleased to inform you all that all any civilians that previously found themselves without homes have now had houses rebuilt for them. There are no longer any food shortages; the fields that were destroyed have now been replanted and reinforced. I have abolished the tithe, there is no need for such things. There is absolute trust and harmony within my court, and the sun shines on us all.

I hope you have all been well, especially you, @lucienvanserraofficial , I heard you’ve been through a lot lately. I do hope that you are happy where you are now. I hope we can all be friends now, since I have returned a sincere and changed person.

Thank you,

High Lord Tamlin.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*hearts beats wildly*

I...am fine, Tamlin. I...was recently captured and imprisoned by a demon while on vacation, but that demon is now dead, thanks to Queen Miryam of Cretea. 

The Night Court is, unfortunately, rather in disarray.  The...demon that captured me also decided to set much of the city of Velaris on fire. 

Would you...like to come to tea with me, perhaps? In Orynth? 

[officialtamlin]

Lucien! I am so sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better soon.

That’s a shame, about the night court. I’m sure Rhysand has it all under his control, right?

Tea with you sounds delightful, name the date and time and I shall be there.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Tommorrow. At two.

And as to your question about Rhysand...😂😂🤣 

No. No he does not. What he was doing while Velaris burned...do you want to know what he was doing while Velaris burned?!!!

[officialtamlin]

Tomorrow at two it is.

And why yes, I am curious. What was he doing while Velaris burnt? 🤔

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Having sex. With Feyre. 

[officialtamlin]

Ah. I would say I’m surprised but I am not. Nevertheless, I wish them all the best.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*gasps* Sorry I’m late, Tamlin. Come-right this way-into my quarters. Tea has already been poured. 

[officialtamlin]

Why thank you, Lucien. This tea smells delicious. How have things been lately, are you recovered?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*sighs* Yes and no. 

I am feeling better since the days of Fienerei. However, just thinking about all that we have to do now makes my head hurt!

Plus, the queen and queen consort almost left me believing that NOW, after TWO demon attacks, one of which has caused a nascent revolution in the Night Court, is the best time to leave and hope that democracy is implemented! 

I BARELY managed to convince the royal couple to stay, and now Her Majesty is pissed at me. Which is understandable, considering all they’ve been through, but still. 

And of all things, that horrid @officialbrycequinlan​ woman tried to offer them drugs. AGAIN. Even though Her Majesty taking drugs was THE REASON the queen consort left and got kidnapped by Fienerei, STARTING this whole mess. 

And the other court members don’t do much work, so thus everything is the responsibility of me and the royal couple. 

[officialtamlin]

Oh dear. That sounds like too much work for you, Lucien, you seem rather overworked. Have you considered taking a break, and staying safe during it too?

Unfortunate about the drug situation, I have no suggestions as to how to proceed there. I really have no idea how to assist in any of this, but be assured I will do whatever I can to ease your burden. 

Would you ever consider visiting the Spring Court? 

[lucienvanserraofficial]

I would love to, but...all this was caused in part thanks to the LAST time I took a vacation. 

[officialtamlin]

I can promise you would be safe here, but it is up to you.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*beams* You are in luck, Tamlin. I have been instructed to keep an eye on the rulers of Prythian for now. 

I suspect this is Her Majesty getting me out of the way, but-who cares? 

As soon as I have reported on the damage in the Night Court to my queen, I am coming straight over to the Spring Court for a visit. 

[officialtamlin]

I look forward to receiving you! As you shall see, the Spring Court has been much improved in your absence.

But oh dear, what is going on in the Night Court??

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*pours Tamlin some more tea*

Nothing short of a full revolution. The people of Velaris are...not pleased with the way their rulers handled the demon.  They are, in fact, attempting to storm the Cabin as we speak. 

Amren tried to fix the crisis somewhat, but that only allowed the revolutionaries to focus solely on Rhysand. Given their....anger at Rhysand, Amren saw which way the wind was blowing and thus officially left the Night Court for good, it seems. Which... seems to mean that the Inner Circle is dismantled for good. 

Now, normally, deposing Rhysand could only be a good thing, bu  I worry that some opportunists in the Hewn City might try and take advantage of the revolution for their own gain. 

I do long to see what you have done with the Spring Court in my absence. Mother knows I could stand to see a court that functions properly. Not to speak ill of my King and Queen-they do a MUCH better job than Rhysand even on their worst days-but two demons in one go are not an easy task to deal with for any ruler-especially ones still in recovery from demonic possession. 

[lysandraashryverofficial]

Not to crash your date, but bro do you want to fucking go? Do you wanna fight dude because let’s fight. Also get your facts straight. Your irresponsibility when selected where to have your vacation and your own disregard for the safety policy you put in place is why there was note/record of a second demon attack in the first place! Which we took care of without any damages to Terrasen! As for the first attack, nobody knew the demons were even here until Fienerei showed up!

I am speechless.

[officialtamlin]

Now now, please no fighting on my post.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

There will be no fighting, Tamlin.  As you know, my mother did not raise me to be such a crass, crude individual as to engage in fisticuffs at the drop of a hat.  Let alone engage in fisticuffs with my superiors. 

Now, hurry back to the Spring Court. I have already arrived, and I do not see why you should sit there and have one of my sovereigns vent her anger on you. 

[officialtamlin]

I am here Lucien.

Perhaps you should indeed “quit while you’re ahead”, as they say. Come work for me, I dare say you’ll be much happier here. Now, a tour?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Oh, I already HAVE, believe me. If Their Majesties The King and Queen cannot take criticism from their loyal servants, they do not deserve to HAVE loyal servants. 

And yes. A tour sounds lovely. 

[officiallucienvanserra]

Sorry about that. I am back now, Tamlin. So how about that tour of the Spring Court? 

[officialtamlin]

Sure thing, Lucien. Follow me, we’ll start with the rose gardens...

[officiallucienvanserra]

There are MULTIPLE rose gardens now?!

[officialtamlin]

Why yes. Did I forget to mention? Gardening is a hobby of mine, now. 😊

[officiallucienvanserra]

Oh, I think you have mentioned your new hobby before, but I am impressed with how you’ve extended the rose gardens, truly. 

[officialtamlin]

Why thank you, Lucien. I am glad you approve. What would you like to see next?

[officialtamlin]

Tamlin Returns

Dear all,

I have taken a break off tumblr.com to try to put my court to rights. I am now pleased to inform you all that all any civilians that previously found themselves without homes have now had houses rebuilt for them. There are no longer any food shortages; the fields that were destroyed have now been replanted and reinforced. I have abolished the tithe, there is no need for such things. There is absolute trust and harmony within my court, and the sun shines on us all.

I hope you have all been well, especially you, @lucienvanserraofficial , I heard you’ve been through a lot lately. I do hope that you are happy where you are now. I hope we can all be friends now, since I have returned a sincere and changed person.

Thank you,

High Lord Tamlin.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*hearts beats wildly*

I...am fine, Tamlin. I...was recently captured and imprisoned by a demon while on vacation, but that demon is now dead, thanks to Queen Miryam of Cretea. 

The Night Court is, unfortunately, rather in disarray.  The...demon that captured me also decided to set much of the city of Velaris on fire. 

Would you...like to come to tea with me, perhaps? In Orynth? 

[officialtamlin]

Lucien! I am so sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better soon.

That’s a shame, about the night court. I’m sure Rhysand has it all under his control, right?

Tea with you sounds delightful, name the date and time and I shall be there.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Tommorrow. At two.

And as to your question about Rhysand...😂😂🤣 

No. No he does not. What he was doing while Velaris burned...do you want to know what he was doing while Velaris burned?!!!

[officialtamlin]

Tomorrow at two it is.

And why yes, I am curious. What was he doing while Velaris burnt? 🤔

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Having sex. With Feyre. 

[officialtamlin]

Ah. I would say I’m surprised but I am not. Nevertheless, I wish them all the best.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*gasps* Sorry I’m late, Tamlin. Come-right this way-into my quarters. Tea has already been poured. 

[officialtamlin]

Why thank you, Lucien. This tea smells delicious. How have things been lately, are you recovered?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*sighs* Yes and no. 

I am feeling better since the days of Fienerei. However, just thinking about all that we have to do now makes my head hurt!

Plus, the queen and queen consort almost left me believing that NOW, after TWO demon attacks, one of which has caused a nascent revolution in the Night Court, is the best time to leave and hope that democracy is implemented! 

I BARELY managed to convince the royal couple to stay, and now Her Majesty is pissed at me. Which is understandable, considering all they’ve been through, but still. 

And of all things, that horrid @officialbrycequinlan​ woman tried to offer them drugs. AGAIN. Even though Her Majesty taking drugs was THE REASON the queen consort left and got kidnapped by Fienerei, STARTING this whole mess. 

And the other court members don’t do much work, so thus everything is the responsibility of me and the royal couple. 

[officialtamlin]

Oh dear. That sounds like too much work for you, Lucien, you seem rather overworked. Have you considered taking a break, and staying safe during it too?

Unfortunate about the drug situation, I have no suggestions as to how to proceed there. I really have no idea how to assist in any of this, but be assured I will do whatever I can to ease your burden. 

Would you ever consider visiting the Spring Court? 

[lucienvanserraofficial]

I would love to, but...all this was caused in part thanks to the LAST time I took a vacation. 

[officialtamlin]

I can promise you would be safe here, but it is up to you.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*beams* You are in luck, Tamlin. I have been instructed to keep an eye on the rulers of Prythian for now. 

I suspect this is Her Majesty getting me out of the way, but-who cares? 

As soon as I have reported on the damage in the Night Court to my queen, I am coming straight over to the Spring Court for a visit. 

[officialtamlin]

I look forward to receiving you! As you shall see, the Spring Court has been much improved in your absence.

But oh dear, what is going on in the Night Court??

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*pours Tamlin some more tea*

Nothing short of a full revolution. The people of Velaris are...not pleased with the way their rulers handled the demon.  They are, in fact, attempting to storm the Cabin as we speak. 

Amren tried to fix the crisis somewhat, but that only allowed the revolutionaries to focus solely on Rhysand. Given their....anger at Rhysand, Amren saw which way the wind was blowing and thus officially left the Night Court for good, it seems. Which... seems to mean that the Inner Circle is dismantled for good. 

Now, normally, deposing Rhysand could only be a good thing, bu  I worry that some opportunists in the Hewn City might try and take advantage of the revolution for their own gain. 

I do long to see what you have done with the Spring Court in my absence. Mother knows I could stand to see a court that functions properly. Not to speak ill of my King and Queen-they do a MUCH better job than Rhysand even on their worst days-but two demons in one go are not an easy task to deal with for any ruler-especially ones still in recovery from demonic possession. 

[lysandraashryverofficial]

Not to crash your date, but bro do you want to fucking go? Do you wanna fight dude because let’s fight. Also get your facts straight. Your irresponsibility when selected where to have your vacation and your own disregard for the safety policy you put in place is why there was note/record of a second demon attack in the first place! Which we took care of without any damages to Terrasen! As for the first attack, nobody knew the demons were even here until Fienerei showed up!

I am speechless.

[officialtamlin]

Now now, please no fighting on my post.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

There will be no fighting, Tamlin.  As you know, my mother did not raise me to be such a crass, crude individual as to engage in fisticuffs at the drop of a hat.  Let alone engage in fisticuffs with my superiors. 

Now, hurry back to the Spring Court. I have already arrived, and I do not see why you should sit there and have one of my sovereigns vent her anger on you. 

[officialtamlin]

I am here Lucien.

Perhaps you should indeed “quit while you’re ahead”, as they say. Come work for me, I dare say you’ll be much happier here. Now, a tour?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Oh, I already HAVE, believe me. If Their Majesties The King and Queen cannot take criticism from their loyal servants, they do not deserve to HAVE loyal servants. 

And yes. A tour sounds lovely. 

[officiallucienvanserra]

Sorry about that. I am back now, Tamlin. So how about that tour of the Spring Court? 

[officialtamlin]

Sure thing, Lucien. Follow me, we’ll start with the rose gardens...

[officiallucienvanserra]

There are MULTIPLE rose gardens now?!

[officialtamlin]

Why yes. Did I forget to mention? Gardening is a hobby of mine, now. 😊

[officialtamlin]

Tamlin Returns

Dear all,

I have taken a break off tumblr.com to try to put my court to rights. I am now pleased to inform you all that all any civilians that previously found themselves without homes have now had houses rebuilt for them. There are no longer any food shortages; the fields that were destroyed have now been replanted and reinforced. I have abolished the tithe, there is no need for such things. There is absolute trust and harmony within my court, and the sun shines on us all.

I hope you have all been well, especially you, @lucienvanserraofficial , I heard you’ve been through a lot lately. I do hope that you are happy where you are now. I hope we can all be friends now, since I have returned a sincere and changed person.

Thank you,

High Lord Tamlin.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*hearts beats wildly*

I...am fine, Tamlin. I...was recently captured and imprisoned by a demon while on vacation, but that demon is now dead, thanks to Queen Miryam of Cretea. 

The Night Court is, unfortunately, rather in disarray.  The...demon that captured me also decided to set much of the city of Velaris on fire. 

Would you...like to come to tea with me, perhaps? In Orynth? 

[officialtamlin]

Lucien! I am so sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better soon.

That’s a shame, about the night court. I’m sure Rhysand has it all under his control, right?

Tea with you sounds delightful, name the date and time and I shall be there.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Tommorrow. At two.

And as to your question about Rhysand...😂😂🤣 

No. No he does not. What he was doing while Velaris burned...do you want to know what he was doing while Velaris burned?!!!

[officialtamlin]

Tomorrow at two it is.

And why yes, I am curious. What was he doing while Velaris burnt? 🤔

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Having sex. With Feyre. 

[officialtamlin]

Ah. I would say I’m surprised but I am not. Nevertheless, I wish them all the best.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*gasps* Sorry I’m late, Tamlin. Come-right this way-into my quarters. Tea has already been poured. 

[officialtamlin]

Why thank you, Lucien. This tea smells delicious. How have things been lately, are you recovered?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*sighs* Yes and no. 

I am feeling better since the days of Fienerei. However, just thinking about all that we have to do now makes my head hurt!

Plus, the queen and queen consort almost left me believing that NOW, after TWO demon attacks, one of which has caused a nascent revolution in the Night Court, is the best time to leave and hope that democracy is implemented! 

I BARELY managed to convince the royal couple to stay, and now Her Majesty is pissed at me. Which is understandable, considering all they’ve been through, but still. 

And of all things, that horrid @officialbrycequinlan​ woman tried to offer them drugs. AGAIN. Even though Her Majesty taking drugs was THE REASON the queen consort left and got kidnapped by Fienerei, STARTING this whole mess. 

And the other court members don’t do much work, so thus everything is the responsibility of me and the royal couple. 

[officialtamlin]

Oh dear. That sounds like too much work for you, Lucien, you seem rather overworked. Have you considered taking a break, and staying safe during it too?

Unfortunate about the drug situation, I have no suggestions as to how to proceed there. I really have no idea how to assist in any of this, but be assured I will do whatever I can to ease your burden. 

Would you ever consider visiting the Spring Court? 

[lucienvanserraofficial]

I would love to, but...all this was caused in part thanks to the LAST time I took a vacation. 

[officialtamlin]

I can promise you would be safe here, but it is up to you.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*beams* You are in luck, Tamlin. I have been instructed to keep an eye on the rulers of Prythian for now. 

I suspect this is Her Majesty getting me out of the way, but-who cares? 

As soon as I have reported on the damage in the Night Court to my queen, I am coming straight over to the Spring Court for a visit. 

[officialtamlin]

I look forward to receiving you! As you shall see, the Spring Court has been much improved in your absence.

But oh dear, what is going on in the Night Court??

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*pours Tamlin some more tea*

Nothing short of a full revolution. The people of Velaris are...not pleased with the way their rulers handled the demon.  They are, in fact, attempting to storm the Cabin as we speak. 

Amren tried to fix the crisis somewhat, but that only allowed the revolutionaries to focus solely on Rhysand. Given their....anger at Rhysand, Amren saw which way the wind was blowing and thus officially left the Night Court for good, it seems. Which... seems to mean that the Inner Circle is dismantled for good. 

Now, normally, deposing Rhysand could only be a good thing, bu  I worry that some opportunists in the Hewn City might try and take advantage of the revolution for their own gain. 

I do long to see what you have done with the Spring Court in my absence. Mother knows I could stand to see a court that functions properly. Not to speak ill of my King and Queen-they do a MUCH better job than Rhysand even on their worst days-but two demons in one go are not an easy task to deal with for any ruler-especially ones still in recovery from demonic possession. 

[lysandraashryverofficial]

Not to crash your date, but bro do you want to fucking go? Do you wanna fight dude because let’s fight. Also get your facts straight. Your irresponsibility when selected where to have your vacation and your own disregard for the safety policy you put in place is why there was note/record of a second demon attack in the first place! Which we took care of without any damages to Terrasen! As for the first attack, nobody knew the demons were even here until Fienerei showed up!

I am speechless.

[officialtamlin]

Now now, please no fighting on my post.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

There will be no fighting, Tamlin.  As you know, my mother did not raise me to be such a crass, crude individual as to engage in fisticuffs at the drop of a hat.  Let alone engage in fisticuffs with my superiors. 

Now, hurry back to the Spring Court. I have already arrived, and I do not see why you should sit there and have one of my sovereigns vent her anger on you. 

[officialtamlin]

I am here Lucien.

Perhaps you should indeed “quit while you’re ahead”, as they say. Come work for me, I dare say you’ll be much happier here. Now, a tour?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Oh, I already HAVE, believe me. If Their Majesties The King and Queen cannot take criticism from their loyal servants, they do not deserve to HAVE loyal servants. 

And yes. A tour sounds lovely. 

[officiallucienvanserra]

Sorry about that. I am back now, Tamlin. So how about that tour of the Spring Court? 

[officialtamlin]

Sure thing, Lucien. Follow me, we’ll start with the rose gardens...

[bleeding-star-heart]

The parody blogs, as encapsulated by memes today:

Amren, Azriel, and the citizens of Velaris: 

@officialqueenaelinashryver​ and @lysandraashryverofficial​ @ Lucien: 

@officialtamlin​, preparing to ensnare Lucien: 

@officialhighlordrhys​ and @officialfeyredarling​, still having sex after all this: 

[officialtamlin]

Excuse me, I am preparing to do no such thing!

[bleeding-star-heart]

You may not need to- with Lysandra threatening to fight him, I think it might be the last straw for him. 

After all, a sovereign ruler threatening violence on her underlings? That’s an abuse of power right there!  Because Lysandra, at the end of the day, IS Lucien’s boss- not the other way around. 

And keep in mind, Lucien HAS been the victim of violence at a ruler’s hands before- re: Amarantha clawing his eye out. 

And Aelin DID promise Lucien she would listen to his advice before doing things. Plus, Lysandra’s post didn’t exactly make clear that it was a constitutional monarchy she had in mind-to any reader, it could sound eerily similar to what Rhysand and Feyre were doing in the cabin- minus the sex, of course, and with “democracy” thrown in as a PC buzzword.  You and I know that’s not what she means, but Lucien’s not psychic-how is he supposed to know? 

This, of course, isn’t an excuse for Lucien’s actions-he shouldn’t have tried to interrupt their vacation OR call them by the wrong titles, no matter how accidental. And he DEFINITELY shouldn’t have trusted a random servant he hadn’t personally vetted to take him to the beach. 

But also, the safety policy he put in place only affected FOREST roads. Not ALL roads. Not that that’s an excuse for Lucien’s actions either. 

[officialtamlin]

Interesting. You seem to know much about Lucien’s life, and our world, despite no one seeming to know who you are. Who are you?

[officialtamlin]

Tamlin Returns

Dear all,

I have taken a break off tumblr.com to try to put my court to rights. I am now pleased to inform you all that all any civilians that previously found themselves without homes have now had houses rebuilt for them. There are no longer any food shortages; the fields that were destroyed have now been replanted and reinforced. I have abolished the tithe, there is no need for such things. There is absolute trust and harmony within my court, and the sun shines on us all.

I hope you have all been well, especially you, @lucienvanserraofficial , I heard you’ve been through a lot lately. I do hope that you are happy where you are now. I hope we can all be friends now, since I have returned a sincere and changed person.

Thank you,

High Lord Tamlin.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*hearts beats wildly*

I...am fine, Tamlin. I...was recently captured and imprisoned by a demon while on vacation, but that demon is now dead, thanks to Queen Miryam of Cretea. 

The Night Court is, unfortunately, rather in disarray.  The...demon that captured me also decided to set much of the city of Velaris on fire. 

Would you...like to come to tea with me, perhaps? In Orynth? 

[officialtamlin]

Lucien! I am so sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better soon.

That’s a shame, about the night court. I’m sure Rhysand has it all under his control, right?

Tea with you sounds delightful, name the date and time and I shall be there.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Tommorrow. At two.

And as to your question about Rhysand...😂😂🤣 

No. No he does not. What he was doing while Velaris burned...do you want to know what he was doing while Velaris burned?!!!

[officialtamlin]

Tomorrow at two it is.

And why yes, I am curious. What was he doing while Velaris burnt? 🤔

[lucienvanserraofficial]

Having sex. With Feyre. 

[officialtamlin]

Ah. I would say I’m surprised but I am not. Nevertheless, I wish them all the best.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*gasps* Sorry I’m late, Tamlin. Come-right this way-into my quarters. Tea has already been poured. 

[officialtamlin]

Why thank you, Lucien. This tea smells delicious. How have things been lately, are you recovered?

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*sighs* Yes and no. 

I am feeling better since the days of Fienerei. However, just thinking about all that we have to do now makes my head hurt!

Plus, the queen and queen consort almost left me believing that NOW, after TWO demon attacks, one of which has caused a nascent revolution in the Night Court, is the best time to leave and hope that democracy is implemented! 

I BARELY managed to convince the royal couple to stay, and now Her Majesty is pissed at me. Which is understandable, considering all they’ve been through, but still. 

And of all things, that horrid @officialbrycequinlan​ woman tried to offer them drugs. AGAIN. Even though Her Majesty taking drugs was THE REASON the queen consort left and got kidnapped by Fienerei, STARTING this whole mess. 

And the other court members don’t do much work, so thus everything is the responsibility of me and the royal couple. 

[officialtamlin]

Oh dear. That sounds like too much work for you, Lucien, you seem rather overworked. Have you considered taking a break, and staying safe during it too?

Unfortunate about the drug situation, I have no suggestions as to how to proceed there. I really have no idea how to assist in any of this, but be assured I will do whatever I can to ease your burden. 

Would you ever consider visiting the Spring Court? 

[lucienvanserraofficial]

I would love to, but...all this was caused in part thanks to the LAST time I took a vacation. 

[officialtamlin]

I can promise you would be safe here, but it is up to you.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*beams* You are in luck, Tamlin. I have been instructed to keep an eye on the rulers of Prythian for now. 

I suspect this is Her Majesty getting me out of the way, but-who cares? 

As soon as I have reported on the damage in the Night Court to my queen, I am coming straight over to the Spring Court for a visit. 

[officialtamlin]

I look forward to receiving you! As you shall see, the Spring Court has been much improved in your absence.

But oh dear, what is going on in the Night Court??

[lucienvanserraofficial]

*pours Tamlin some more tea*

Nothing short of a full revolution. The people of Velaris are...not pleased with the way their rulers handled the demon.  They are, in fact, attempting to storm the Cabin as we speak. 

Amren tried to fix the crisis somewhat, but that only allowed the revolutionaries to focus solely on Rhysand. Given their....anger at Rhysand, Amren saw which way the wind was blowing and thus officially left the Night Court for good, it seems. Which... seems to mean that the Inner Circle is dismantled for good. 

Now, normally, deposing Rhysand could only be a good thing, bu  I worry that some opportunists in the Hewn City might try and take advantage of the revolution for their own gain. 

I do long to see what you have done with the Spring Court in my absence. Mother knows I could stand to see a court that functions properly. Not to speak ill of my King and Queen-they do a MUCH better job than Rhysand even on their worst days-but two demons in one go are not an easy task to deal with for any ruler-especially ones still in recovery from demonic possession. 

[lysandraashryverofficial]

Not to crash your date, but bro do you want to fucking go? Do you wanna fight dude because let’s fight. Also get your facts straight. Your irresponsibility when selected where to have your vacation and your own disregard for the safety policy you put in place is why there was note/record of a second demon attack in the first place! Which we took care of without any damages to Terrasen! As for the first attack, nobody knew the demons were even here until Fienerei showed up!

I am speechless.

[officialtamlin]

Now now, please no fighting on my post.

[lucienvanserraofficial]

There will be no fighting, Tamlin.  As you know, my mother did not raise me to be such a crass, crude individual as to engage in fisticuffs at the drop of a hat.  Let alone engage in fisticuffs with my superiors. 

Now, hurry back to the Spring Court. I have already arrived, and I do not see why you should sit there and have one of my sovereigns vent her anger on you. 

[officialtamlin]

I am here Lucien.

Perhaps you should indeed “quit while you’re ahead”, as they say. Come work for me, I dare say you’ll be much happier here. Now, a tour?