ｓｅｃｏｎｄａｒｙ

" You’re not special. You’re not a beautiful or unique snowflake; you’re the same decaying organic matter as everything else." Rabastan Lestrange Twenty-two Hit Wizard Slytherin Alumni Death Eater

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

I don’t care. I have all the power I want now. I don’t need anymore, I am not going to be his puppet so he can send me to do his dirty work. I belong to no one. (She laughs, bitterly) I didn’t have a choice! You know that. There was no one to protect me, not from anyone but especially not from him. (She glares at him once he drops her wand) You are a coward. You were capable of killing so many people before, you just get the job done. Then why don’t you do it? You talk about me as if I’ve ruined you. So come on, kill your demons, be free of me. Isn’t that what you want? Isn’t that the reason you came to see my face? For your own sanity? 

[ofinferiority]

What else are you going to do? he clenches his teeth. You always had a choice, you never needed anyone to protect you Sophia. There’s no point in time where you haven’t been able to perfectly protect yourself. he’s unable to stop glaring at her now, his mouth falling shut. I haven’t ever wanted to be free of you.

[benpaulson]

Because they’re useful; when they’re not overstepping their boundaries that is. I doubt they’ll do that any longer. (He rolls his eyes) Rabastan don’t start acting like a child. Good. Are you sure you’ll be fine doing this on your own?  

[ofinferiority]

Doesn’t look like it to me. I think we’re much more useful. he shrugs. Relax I was just joking with you. I thought you’d be used to that by now. ‘Course I am --why the hell wouldn’t I be fine?

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

I do have a choice, I am going to run away. I won’t fight for him anymore. He’s weaker now, there’s no way he’s going to win. I know enough about strategy to realise that. It came too late because of you! You abandoned me! You left me alone with him. Do you want to know everything he did? Do you want me to show you every scar he left while he was shaping what I am now? How he took it on me because I turned into a living corpse without you? He killed me. You’re watching a dead woman. He killed me because he took everything away, until there was nothing there. I am an empty shell, but I still refuse to sell my freedom. So if you want to fight so much for your cause, you should save your friends and your brother some time and kill me right here because I am not going to go back there. (She takes out her wand and places it in his hand) Come on Rabastan, kill me. If you really think we were doomed from the beginning do it. Shoot the spell like you did with Alice; take the life away from my eyes like you did with her. (She pushes him, encouraging him to lift the wand) I’m easily disposable, like you said. You are murdering a traitor, a deserter, it’s almost like following orders. What are you waiting for?! Kill me now! 

[ofinferiority]

What the hell are you going to do if you run away? You’re going to look pretty stupid once he, or someone else comes after you. What’s the point in doing anything else now? he practically growls as he speaks his next words. You should have left him a long time ago Sophia, even if I was gone. He shouldn’t have been given that much power over you. as she continues he stands there, frozen, it’s the first time in over a decade he’s felt purely afraid. then once she pushes him he stares right at her, dropping the wand she’s placed in his hand onto the ground. No. Do you really think I could be capable of killing you? 

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

Do you hear yourself? The cause? The cause was never real! The cause was invented by people thirsty of power who wanted idiots like you to do their dirty work. The cause is nothing now. I refuse to be commanded by a living corpse who’s obsessed with killing a child! (She walks over to him) At least when I kill I feel something. It’s my work, each one of my killings a masterpiece. You do it because you don’t have willpower. I bet your brother is so proud of the soulless monster you’ve become. (Her voice gets louder as she moves closer to him) It could have been different! We could have run away like many others when the whole thing ended. Voldemort was dead, everyone was saving their asses. That was our time. But you didn’t care. You chose your pride over me. (She’s right in front of him now, their bodies almost touching) You’ve seen me now. You can leave. Go die for your bloody cause. 

[ofinferiority]

It’s not nothing if it’s what got me out --twice. The cause isn’t nothing --it’s more apparent than it’s ever been, we’re no longer defeated. Why don’t you see that? You don’t have a choice now, everything’s coming back and we’re all going to have to fight for him again. he scoffs. It has nothing to do with willpower --I don’t need to create something when I kill someone. I just need to see them squirm and get the job done. he clenches his teeth, standing right in front of her now. Then our time came too late! I didn’t choose over you --you think I planned getting caught? Maybe we were never supposed to have a time, we were doomed from the beginning. he takes a deep breath, eyes stuck on her. Alright. 

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

Is that supposed to make it better? The fact that you went for me? That gives you the right to do what you did? (Her fingers move and the cigarette she’s holding turns to ashes in her hand) How can you say that?! How can you treat them as if they were anyone else? They were not! (She stands up and walks away from him) You know what’s the worst part of this? You didn’t even prove yoursel. You’re still as pathetic as you were before you abandoned me. All these years in jail they didn’t change a thing. You still think you’re worthless, and I’m starting to believe you. Then why are you here? And don’t tell me you just wanted to see my face. I don’t believe you. 

[ofinferiority]

It’s supposed to make you understand. I have the right to do whatever I please, especially when it comes to the cause. he sighs, it’s long and dragged out. How can you argue that they were something else? They were easily disposable, and needed to be disposed of. Just like everyone else is. --And you’re telling me something would be different if I had? I don’t believe that for a bloody second. I don’t think anything is going to change, did you think I assumed being stuffed behind bars was going to make me better? You should believe me, you have no reason not to. Why else would I be here? As stupid as it is --I needed to see you. I don’t have another answer for you. 

[ofinferiority]

how does future au rabastan feel about sophia?

OOC: In short; he still loves her as much as he always has. It’s more complicated than his feelings for her at this point though. Obviously he’s angry about how things turned out, getting imprisoned, leaving her, making another huge mistake and being unable to be there for her. In his mind he does feel like he betrayed her –and that really gets to him. After being in Azkaban for over a decade he’s absolutely lost any optimistic approach he would have had to the situation right now. He’s been pretty much telling himself for the past decade that he’s betrayed her, and that there’s absolutely no way they would have been able to reach the happiness with her he’s wanted. He’s basically given up on trying to work towards a future with her, because now it seems hopeless to him now. Though this doesn’t change the fact that he does still very much love her, and she is the thought that’s kept him going. 

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

Oui, I’ve done plenty worse, and so have you, but she was my friend. You didn’t have to do it. You went to their wedding! (She glares at him, taking a drag of her cigarette as if nothing mattered) Maybe you shouldn’t have done things in my interest. We wouldn’t be here right now if you had acted differently. (She sighs) What do you want from me? 

[ofinferiority]

I was following orders, I don’t hardly think that matters --I went for you remember? I don’t care about them. They needed to be dealt with, and they were. That’s it. Right I almost forgot, everything is my fucking fault isn’t it? That’s fine I’m the stupid one who never did anything right. You know as well as I do we wouldn’t be any better off right now if I’d chosen differently, you’d still be married to him and I’d still have no chance in changing things. It’s tiring. --I don’t want anything from you. 

[emmavanityx-deactivated20160212]

It’s called survival instinct, I think you probably have a higher number of powerful enemies compared to my list. [lifts her brows but doesn’t ask] I could be worse, and I think my problems might not be quite as terrible as yours in any case.

[ofinferiority]

Do not, you’re only saying that because you need to defend not helping me out. Could have been something good in here. he chuckles. What makes you think my problems are so terrible? C’mon --lay one of yours on me. 

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

Non, it does not matter at all. Merde! What? Plenty worse? You’re comparing what you did to an accident I had when I was sixteen?! Which you helped covering up! That’s ridiculous! (She snorts, her laugh bitter) Rabastan you stopped doing things for your own sanity a long time ago, even before you got thrown into a cell. It’s been almost ten years. My face changed. I’m not the same person you left. 

[ofinferiority]

he sighs. Believe it or not I wasn’t talking about a mudblood you knocked out at sixteen. You’ve topped that since then, I’m sure. Oh no I didn’t, everything I did was in your interest which was ultimately was what was keeping me sane. I know how long it’s been, trust me --but you haven’t changed entirely. 

[benpaulson]

Of course not. Let’s say the road for the unmarked just became a lot harder. But we still have this problem to deal and I’m not going to let them do it. (He rolls his eyes) You’re not even worth that much money. No. This woman had an ex-husband. I need you to scare him off. Make sure he’ll say everything we want him to say. Is that clear? 

[ofinferiority]

Good, you shouldn’t really have let them do anything in the first place to be honest. What makes you think they could ever do anything? he shrugs. I don’t know you sound pretty desperate. he nods. Absolutely. Won’t be a problem.

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

It could have been. The war has been over for years now. You were the one who decided you wanted to prove yourself. (She glares at him) You tortured my friend and her husband. You ended their lives, worse than that. (She tilts her head, her expression shifting) Then why are you here, Rabastan? Pray tell. Is this some kind of poetic justice? 

[ofinferiority]

No, it couldn’t have and we’re stupid to pretend anything else. I wouldn’t have stopped trying to prove myself either way, that doesn’t even matter now. he nods. You’ve done plenty worse, don’t go glaring at me about this of all things. --I don’t do poetic. No, I really only wanted to see your face --for my own sanity. 

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

You know this whole on and off game between us is getting a bit repetitive. I leave, you leave, we come back, we need each other. I’m a little tired. (She finally looks at him, her eyes empty of emotion) I told you not to do it, and you followed your brother. You had to impress him, didn’t you? Look where we are now. I’m still alive, I’m still married and you are a mess. 

[ofinferiority]

So am I. his face hardens, though he’s still looking at her. In short; nothing’s changed at all. Isn’t that lucky? --Do you really think for a second that if I didn’t go we’d be anywhere different than where we are right now? I think we have the routine perfected at this point, that’s not why I’m here. 

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

[sophiaetaestus]

You’re supposed to be in jail, yet you come here, to my grand mére’s home and demand to see me. What gives you the right, Rabastan? 

[ofinferiority]

Yes, I’m aware of where I should be --but I’m here. Now. And you’re right, I have no right to be here at all but I wanted to see you. I couldn’t stay away Sophia. 

[ofinferiority]

Future AU { 1997 }

Before you say it --I know I shouldn’t be here okay? I just wanted to see you. 

[zacsfron-a]

[benpaulson]

And what on Earth makes you think it’s already dealt with? I’m still trying to pay the press off so they won’t publish anything. Of course we still need to find someone to blame this whole thing on. Which is why I need you to do a little thing for me. 

[ofinferiority]

You haven’t scared the both of them the fuck off yet? Well I was thinking since everyone’s pissed, no one’s going to let anyone have enough freedom to do that kind of shit anyway. --Alright. Please don’t tell me that you’re going to pay me to the press. 

[ofinferiority]

You can really see how much you love Rabastan as a character and that’s what makes him so lovely to read.

You’ve got that right, he’s absolutely one of my favourite characters to play. I’m glad he’s enjoyed! Thank you!