HC: Things Ardyn Izunia did in the Citadel for the 10 years he spent waiting for Noctis:
Tried on all King Regis’s clothes
Drew mustaches on all the royal portraits.
Except Somnus’s, which he burned.
Drank all the wine. Not necessarily because he wanted it, and he can’t get drunk. But just in case they decided to celebrate once he was dead and the dawn had returned, he was petty enough not to want them to have anything good to drink.
Actually he left one really good bottle but he hid it with an elaborate series of clues revealing the location. Written in Old Lucian.
Ignis finds it 2 years after the dawn returns.
Made an elaborate comic about his life and the astrals, with crudely drawn stick figures, that he inserted in every version of the Cosmology AND all relevant history books.
Painted his own portrait and hung it up on the wall. His portrait depicts him giving finger guns a la Prompto.
Collected every single hat in the Citadel and tried them on. He didn’t like any of them better than his usual hat, so he went through the Royal statuary and put hats on all of the statues.
Slid down the banisters because why not, it’s not like anything can kill him, right?
Let a group of Tonberries move in to the library.
Threw some of the Royal China off a balcony for no reason other than to hear it break
Played board games with the aforementioned tonberries.
He usually won, but they were very good at checkers.
Made a batch of cookies and left them for the crownsguard and kingsglaive who were constantly trying to overtake him and win back the Citadel.
Of course they thought they were poisoned cookies, but they weren’t. They were just oatmeal raisin.
Literally put on some thousand thread count sheets and ran around like he was a ghost just to see if anyone noticed.
Recorded a video of himself and put it on YouTube with “Real Ghost Sighted in Citadel!”
Got into fights on the internet about old Solheim history. And Lucian history. And literally everything else.
Set up the world’s most infuriating, depressing and trollish Instagram ever. (“Look how lovely the former Queen’s crown looks on this flan!”)
Made an Instagram account for the tonberries.
Actually, other than his long ago past as a Healer, the tonberry Instagram account is the most popular thing he’s ever done.
Catches up on all his podcasts.
Attempts to teach the tonberries to speak so they, too, can have a podcast. (It doesn’t work).
Fixed the elevator for Noctis when he came back. he does not want to have his final battle with a king who was still trying to catch his breath from all those stairs.
Writes a letter adressed to Noctis that basically says “thank you” in Old Lucian.
Leaves it where he doesn’t think anyone will ever find it, much less be able to read what it says.
Ignis finds it, and knows exactly what it says.
He finds the letter next to the wine.
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