[saccharineandsalacious]

Addiction. Spending money on drugs instead of necessities. Emptying your bank account for a gram. Starving for days, high on the shit that makes you feel invincible. Stealing from family to make it through the week you say it’s for gas but it’s really for drugs. Giving your body to a man that sees you as a piece of meat just for 300 bucks a week you feel worthless. Addiction. Always wanting to quit but never knowing how. Addiction. Afraid to tell your family because you’re scared they’ll shut you out. Addiction. Snorting lines in your room alone because you have nothing better to do. Addiction. Feeling like the biggest failure for just trying to numb the pain. Addiction.

[ptsdying]

[vodkakilledtheteen]

You like to use things that make you forget about who you really are. You smoke weed for a fresh breath of air every morning and every night and in between those times. You pour alcohol down your throat like it’s the last bit of water during a drought. When there’s no room for sleep you like to confiscate your insomnia with sleeping pills. You like to use things that make you forget about who you really are too much, and I wish I realized this when our bodies started to collide with flames, and you told me “I can’t get enough of you.” You only come around when you want to melt yourself, and I’m just another cheap thrill to you.

— Alexa Evangelista, the book I’ll never finish writing

[deathinfire-blog1]

[spiritsdancinginthenight-deacti]

I wish I could just be brave and say ‘Fuck you OCD’ and ignore all the urges to do rituals. Even tumblr triggers me. There’s not one day or hour in my life that an OCD thought doesn’t pop in my head. Everything is OCD, and it’s got to stop. I got to be brave because I’ve proved it wrong so many times, why do I let it have a hold on me?

[recoveringminds1stepatatime]

When my mania is in full swing

[randomreasonstolive]

Reason to Live #3218

  To slow dance with the love of my life in the kitchen while we listen to old songs and enjoy a drink. – Guest Submission

(Please don’t add negative comments to these posts.)

[this-one-is-me]

Dear people who make box sets of books

Please make the boxes bigger than just big enough for the books, because when you read the books they expand and then they can never all fit back in the box again and now my bookshelf is untidy

sincerely frustrated

[lxremipsumm]

got my tarot today and bitch told me that in my future I’ll be dependent in a relationship with someone. I already know fUCK, THANKS FOR MAKING IT MORE OBVIOUS.

[boatcats]

That awkward “someone noticed my OCD rituals in public feeling”. :p

[the-suicide-effect]

"It all starts with not wanting to get out of bed, that's how you know you're getting bad again"

[relapse-babe]

sometimes i feel like the only ana that doesn’t exercise and doesn’t care about the nutritional value of the food i eat. all i care about is the calories. like i just ate a slice of pizza from domino’s and that’s all i’m eating today…my ed is telling me i’m so fat for eating pizza but that one slice was 330 calories and the smallest one in the box. eating disorders are weird dude.

[depresseddisneyprincess]

here’s to those who didn’t make it to 2020 and here’s to those who didn’t think they’d make it to 2020

[ceo-of-regulus-black-deactivate]

To have an eating disorder without being super thin nor fat, is frustrating and weird because nobody takes you seriously. Not even your own self.

I do have anorexic behaviors such as restricting and skipping meals, I do body checks religiously and I have an addiction to over exercising however I can’t perceive myself as “anorexic” and neither do the people around me.

«but you’re not that skinny» is the commonest comment I receive and despite me knowing that, it still hurts. It feels as if I have to gain the right to claim that problem as mine because currently, I’m not “worthy” of that title.

I also binge, sometimes. When I’m emotionally unstable I just throw myself in to food and I became capable of shoving down a ridiculous amount of calories in just one sitting. «but you’re not that fat» and there it is, that one comment that suggests I don’t have a problem at all. Who cares if I eat my emotions? Who cares if just lay down with a belly full of food, crying because even breathing hurts? My body shape doesn’t show my problem therefore I don’t have it.

Being in a position where your body doesn’t show clearly your eating disorder(s), sucks and it makes recovery a hundred times harder because if nobody can see i’m hurting, why should I be attemping to better my life?

[c0llarbonxs]

Lol is it possible to relapse even if I never got better? Like I just suddenly got so so much worse

[edrecoveryprobs]

#edrecoverystruggles

#resistdietculture

[disorderedd]

Repeat after me:

eating disorders are defined by a persons disordered thoughts and eating habits, not their weight or appearance