i know thereâs a lot of talk abt a helena redemption arc.
but i donât just want to see a helena redemption arc.
i wanna see her have a psychotic crash out. like a full on 808. like the kind of crash out that happens when your highly always-expecting, always disappointed father, after years of chipping away at your child-self says he wants the same child-self back.
the kind of crash out that comes when youâve broken parts of yourself and sinned for a love that will never be yours.
the kind of crash out that comes when you were forced to dim and finally extinguish that childhood fire only for you to be told, that all along those years, your father wants the same childhood spirit back. the childhood spirit HE crushed.
the kind of crash out that comes when youâve moulded and moulded and remoulded parts of your body and yourself, quite literally, to fit into his ever-changing human-sized hole where his âperfectâ descendent of Kier should belong just to find that an inner version of yourself, essentially your childhood self, a freer version of you, the version of yourself that has experienced more love in less than a month against the THIRTY whole years of your life, fits that hole better than your entire lifetime of restriction, oppression, control, sacrifice and suffering.
the kind of crash out that comes when youâve given up everything, your heart, blood, tears, sweat, your own fucking body from the skin to the soul only to know that your father never loved you.
the kind of crash out where all you can see is blood red.
i want to see her full on covered with blood, eyes with psychotic anger for all the childhood abuse sheâs suffered. (maybe not quite literally but you get what i mean)
i know people had talked about the satisfaction if helly stabbed jame eagan with a pen. but i want to see helena do it. i need to see helena do it.
because there is just something so beautifully destructive about a character so morally grey like her. something so poetic about the justice served when jame eagan dies in the hands of his own blood and creation, and NOT the version of her that she created, NOT the version of her that severance created, NOT the version of her that was born despite the cold of Kier, no, killed by the version he created, he oppressed, he moulded, he made. something so tragically pleasant about a tortured daughter killing her feelingless father. something so frankenstein about a monster, a creation killing her own creator for the torture she had to go through for just being born.
i want to see her break. change. transform. turn into something so fiery, the same fire jame eagan had wanted, but the same fire he will fear.
something about her to truly show him the monster he created.
and not because helly experienced actual friendship with dylan, or the love of real fatherhood from irving, or the unconditional love of a real lover from mark. all the things she was never even born with given to a version of her that never suffered the ruthlessness of her jame.
but because her own father spat at the person he created.
i want her to do what her inner consciousnessâs REAL father (irving) wanted to do and that was to burn this place to the ground.
because helena eagan is a woman scorned by her own bloodline.
and hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
