You know whatās crazy? The more and more I deal with ppl how they deal w me now I see what a disservice I did to them to love them so much and without limits.
They think this energy and vibe comes from a bottomless well. That I just was gonna be able to pour without them ever giving anything back. Not a fuck you, how are you, or what do you need ever in my life bc hey, I just give give give right?
Iām flabbergasted. Truly speechless that now when I ask for a little bit of the love I gave so willingly they bawk. Like what do you mean you want me to ask you how youāre doing? For what?
I feel like Iām asking for too much. Like it would be easier to return to status quo but I canāt. You canāt go back and unsee things once they are obvious. Iām hurt bc I donāt feel itās right to be treated like asking for a little bit of love back is too much when Iāve given you everything I could give time and time again.
Itās truly so so sad to me and lonely.