today 21 nov 2023
feel so burn out, recently just got somanything i need to handle by mysellf, or actually i am not suppose to handle it alone but too much put confindence that i can handle everything alone, no space to believe to anyone.
i do tired to myself, i want to be a person who can be more relaxe, simple, not think to much, i do afraid of many thing, but i can not explain where, what, and how. everything have been tuckle up inside me.
first of all,, i want to love someone, purely, sincerely, feel the butterfly on my stomach, the last time maybe 8 years ago. however, i feel i like someone but i know i am not, he already hv gf, sometimes miss him, hate him, want to know more, see every emotion, know everything about him. gratefull can see him. but to be in relationship, i dont thing so.. why i too afraid to be in relationship?
