what a lovely day to remind everyone with a personality disorder that they aren’t inherently abusive and that they deserve just as much love as everyone else and that they are beautiful, amazing, and strong.

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@onelionsjourney
what a lovely day to remind everyone with a personality disorder that they aren’t inherently abusive and that they deserve just as much love as everyone else and that they are beautiful, amazing, and strong.
some self-care/mental health tips for the upcoming school year
with school coming soon or already starting for some people i figured i’d share some of my tips for a healthier lifestyle. i know in the past i’ve struggled so much with being good to myself once school starts, both mentally, emotionally, and physically!
keep a clean room
i know how hard this is. i’m absolutely awful at it, even in the summer but it really makes the biggest difference. coming home to a mess when your life is already stressful and messy enough just makes things worse. i know when i have a clean space i’m way more productive and at peace with my situation.
take a break from social media
just doing this every once in awhile makes the hugest difference. social media is a wonderful world but it’s easy to get caught up in how everyone is doing things without you or having more fun or how someone’s prettier or whatever. it’s not worth it. i’ve learned that just deleting the apps for even a few hours can make my mental state 10x better. it’s important to realize that while people are out doing things all the time, you can never be as fun as all the 162 people you follow combined.
don’t be afraid to invite people out
one of the biggest things i struggle with is being social, simply because i overthink inviting people to do things with me too much and just wait to be invited by someone else instead. remember that even if someone says they can’t do something, it’s not the end of the world. at least you opened up a possibility!!! by being someone who invites others to do things, people will feel more appreciated and like you actually want to hang out with them! but also always save time for yourself as well!
create a self-care routine with motivation
by giving yourself some type of reward to wash your face, brush your teeth and shower, such as only watching your favorite tv show afterwards, it will feel a bit easier to accomplish the tasks that seem simple but can be terribly hard, especially if you suffer from depression. i’ve learned that combining things into one task also makes it easier, such as once you get in the shower, do everything. wash your face, brush your teeth, shave, all in the shower. it makes self-care so much easier.
get outside, stay out of bed
laying in bed is the best thing ever, i know, but it can be so easy to get in there and never get out. this is my biggest bad habit. i feel more productive even just sitting on the couch. my bed is like a black hole of lost motivation. go outside for twenty minutes a day if you can. sunlight makes things a little better and staying inside all day does nothing for you.
do one thing that scares you everyday, big or small.
i’m someone who has struggled with social anxiety for years now, but i’m slowly getting better because i’m making a conscious (and very terrifying effort) everyday. this won’t work for everyone, i know, but it’s helped me a little bit. i try to challenge myself everyday to do one thing that scares me, whether it’s asking someone to do something after school or agreeing to get coffee with a friend you’re not super close to yet, or even just making conversation with someone next to me in class. don’t push yourself too far but don’t make zero effort either.
cut the negative language/mindset
anytime you have a negative thought find a reverse positive. even saying “i’m not happy with how my hair looks but my ass looks great in these jeans” is better than saying “i look awful today”. stop the constant internal bullying! think of it this way, if your best friend said the things you say to yourself, how would you feel? you’re your own best friend, so cut the shit! compliment yourself like you do your best friend. complimenting myself and finding things i find beautiful on my own body even once a day has increased my confidence exponentially. a negative language towards yourself leads to a negative mindset.
find someone who motivates you
if you need motivation to work out, study, anything, find a buddy. having someone to do things with and hold you accountable makes a world of difference. this summer i got together with a friend and made a deal that we would work out 2-3 times a week. it worked so much better than if i had just made that goal for myself because she was always there to text me to ask to workout when we needed to but i lacked the desire. and i did the same for her. now we actually both got a job at a gym together this fall and are working out consistently because we have that mutual accountability with each other! plus just having someone you enjoy seeing makes doing the hard task more fun!
accept your individuality
you don’t need to look like society’s ideal of beautiful. there’s millions of types of flowers, and just because one kind is pretty to someone, does that make all the others ugly? no. there’s tons of species of dogs too and they all look totally different. is a poodle ugly just because a golden retriever is cute? NO. your individuality is you. everyone is beautiful in the very own unique way. don’t try to look like someone ellse. your beauty is not measured by how perfect your features are.
drink some fucking water
and eat some food too
understand that a bad week doesn’t mean a bad life
we’re all going to go through those weird ass time periods where it feels like everything sucks and nothing can go right. accept that although it’s pretty bad right now, it won’t be forever.
good luck with this school year everyone! hope my tips help even just one person. take care of yourselves, kiddos.
You have survived. You are here. Confused maybe, screwed up, perhaps. But you are here and you’re trying and that’s what matters most.
Productive Things That Aren’t Studying
washing the dishes
making your bed
tidying your book/dvd shelf/shelves
cleaning the cupboard/wardrobe
reading
sleeping
writing a blog
planning your month/week/day
replying to messages or asks
responding to emails
sorting through letters/mail
clearing your email inbox
organising stationery
clean your sinks
clean your toilets
pet your pet
sort through old clothes
give to charity
go on a walk
go on a run
clean down any surfaces
work out
meal prep
get rid of empty shampoo bottles from the shower
clean out old food from the cupboard/fridge
empty out your school bag
call your parent
unfriend/unfollow people you no longer interact with
watch a TEDTalk
empty the bins/trash
clean the mirrors in your house
hug your pet
wash some clothes
buy any birthday cards/presents that you need to
reply to any old texts
make a tumblr post on productive things that aren’t studying
you are strong enough to do what you need to
gentle reminder
it’s okay if something is hard and you can’t do it just yet, you’ll get there with practice and determination
like half my personality is just symptoms
“At least you love me.” I say to my pet as I hold them against my chest as they try to get away
reminder: you can start over at anytime. your day is not ruined. your world is not over. take a deep breath. start over.
who wants to (vali)date me
Writing with BPD: Example I.
“Hey you idiot” She beat, “You love him.” In that moment I knew what the sun and moon must feel like. I knew the ache, the longing, the gut wrenching desire to be with the one you love but have endless space between you. Watching your lover rise and set, wax and wane, and live and breath from what seems like an impossible distance. The poor moon, being surrounded by stars that lack everything that makes the sun amazing. The sun wanting to bring light to all the dark and hopeless places the moon tries to hide but being helpless to do so. Who knows if one day we’ll get an eclipse of our own.
probably one of the happiest sounds is when your pet comes running for you and you can hear the little pat pats of their feet on the floor
sorry, I can’t go with you, social interaction machine broke
accepting this body did not mean convincing myself that it was beautiful, it meant giving myself permission to exist regardless.
Trista Mateer (via tristamateer)
me: cant fucking chill