Nico @onlyonestraightcouple - Tumblr Blog

About me & my works & commissions

Please for the love of the gods message me if you have any questions or just want to chat. I am chronically online.

#ao3 #archive of our own #ao3 fanfic #ao3 writer #fanfic #fanfiction #fic writing #about myself #intro post #introduction #introductory post #blog intro

shamebats

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

byjove

hey man, I can’t make it tomorrow. mom just told me I have to go into grandpa’s funeral barrow and fight his draugr for the family heirloom cursed sword. it’s probably going to be an all day thing. yeah, I know. I’m sorry.

alliezweihander

"if you forgot then it obviously wasn't important to you" is an ableist thing to say and i'm tired of pretending it's not

byjove

I think it would be so funny if there was a show about King Arthur and the knight of the Round Table where a different knight(s) joins the Round Table every episode and it gets to the point where the cast is like 500 people and absolutely no one is acknowledging that there are like 400 people in this court. Like a gratuitous amount of knights. The plot randomly pivots to knight or knights of the week and then back but it’s not an anthology exactly. Some of them die the same day they join, some randomly disappear from the story and others are technically there for the rest of the series but doing fuckall. Occasionally Arthur will be like “Where has Sir Whatever gone?” and everyone will shrug. Very important quest surrounding the major knights you’re expecting and a minor knight no one has seen for 5 seasons randomly joins in. You need a knightly spreadsheet to join in.

byjove

This is all handled very dryly by all the other characters, except for Arthur who occasionally breaks the 3rd wall, addresses the camera and says something like “This is all very confusing.” when the plot hits maximum ridiculousness.

byjove

There are several knights who do not speak Welsh and this is depicted by them speaking various dialects of old French and Gaulish and Brittonic splinter languages with a bar at the bottom that just says ‘I do not know what he is saying.’

Sometimes Arthur will be like “Where has Sir Whatever gone?” and someone is like “He has become a saint.” or “I believe he has become king of Dumnonia.” and there’s a random quick montage of this random knight getting up from the Round Table, riding out of Camelot and having religious visions or conquering an entire kingdom or drunkenly wandering all the way to Constantinople for no particular reason with the implication that this was all occurring while the other knights were debating a riddle or something asinine.

byjove

I think it would be so funny if the first shot of the series was Arthur sitting alone at a comedically large actually round table. Court utterly empty except for him and Sir Kay and like 2 guys from his father’s reign. And in the closing scene of the series he’s sitting in the same spot but there are hundreds of knights crammed into the room around him, sitting on each other’s laps, on the table, pressed flat against the walls to fit. They outgrew and surpassed this ridiculously large table several seasons ago and have been lowkey sitting on top of each other without addressing it.

krakenartificer

Everywhere in between the opening shot and the closing shot, the overhead shots show a normal number of people sitting at a normal sized table (say, 8 people around a round conference table), but when you pan around the table, you pan past 25 knights before you come back to Arthur.

Also, fundamental worldbuilding concepts vary from episode to episode and it's never addressed. Arthur got his sword from a rock and from the Lady of the Lake. Merlin ages both backwards and forwards. No one sees anything unusual about this.

krakenartificer

#this is actually how arthurian lit works tho#like please someone make this it would probably be the best adaptation of we have

Right? Like I cannot emphasize enough how much you would NOT have to make anything up or change anything from "canon" to make this happen.

You just go through Arthurian legend (I'm thinking chronologically by publication date, but I'm open to arguments for other methods) and transform prose/poetry into script and film it. That's all there is to it.

Oh, and every time there's another version of a story, you just tell that story again with the slightly different details. Pellinore's gonna be discovering a dragon on his property at least twice a season. Guinivere and Lancelot start a brand new love affair every other week.

imjunebitch

omegaversereloaded

Evil music fills my heart with splendor

allthingswhumpyandangsty

drulalovescas

everybody say thank you, fanfiction

pjharvey

"which could mean nothing" is one of the most useful phrases to ever enter my lexicon thank you rpf

joleneghoul

i think censoring subtitles is actually ableism

hypotenussy

the number 1 rule of fanfic is have fun and be yourself. the number 2 rule is the average healthy adult male can lose roughly 2 liters of blood before dying.