Thoroughly enjoyed these performances, JK's voice was super stable and smooth. Loved the female dancers and the choreo to Closer to You, where we can see some of his dance lessons in house style from last year coming through
I noticed some lyrics blanked out from Jack's part on 3D were "dead body" (my personal ick) "shrooms" and "whoring". Interesting...
But I have to say the E version of 3D is the first BTS-related song that I don't want to play on principle. Anyhoo, I'm not here to write directly about why JaHa's part is ick for me; what really got under my skin today were the arguments calling people out for criticizing it.
(1) "It's not misogynistic if she's consenting." What. Consent just makes it not assault and that's a low bar for me to want to support a song.
(2) "You're a prude." Got no problem with explicit lyrics or multiple partners but don't appreciate women being lined up as interchangeable conquests and whatever that reference to dead bodies was.
(3) "Guys their age think like this." Maybe but that's no reason not to keep fighting against normalizing that.
(4) "This is nothing compared to most rap." Exactly, and this is why I'll only listen to the kind that doesn't degrade women in the lyrics.
(5) "You're infantalizing and trying to control the artist." This is not telling him to stop smoking or go to bed or not to experiment with his music. He can of course do as he thinks best but if I think he's gone in a dodgy direction on a serious issue, I'm going to say it.
(6) "Trust JK, all that should matter is that this was his choice." Nope, because despite being called idols they are not gods but humans who make mistakes and have errors of judgment. We are proud that Joon listened to critiques of earlier lyrics and learned. How can that happen with blind sycophancy no matter what?
I don't write much anymore but damn I had to get that out of my system. As you were!!!
BTS member Namjoon's history with misogyny and feminism, because I personally want this all in one list just for me:
(if you screenshot this to share anywhere, PLEASE source and/or link me. i'm sick of writing BTS posts and it going viral on twt when someone else steals it)
Oct 2014 — Namjoon writes lyrics for the misogynistic song "War of Hormone," including a line about how women are "the best gift."
March 2015 — Namjoon writes lyrics for his misogynistic song "Joke," including saying he's going to tell people that a "bossy" woman he doesn't like has gonorrhea (in Korean, “being bossy” and “gonorrhea” rhyme/are off by one letter). He then writes that he wants this woman to blow him.
June 2016 — Namjoon gets criticized for his misogynistic lyrics in "Joke" and "War of Hormone," and he says:
“The most controversial things came from what I wrote. I thought, ‘I was so ignorant.’ I wanted to study a lot. Since then, I have been taking women and gender studies classes at a university. […] I do contemplate a lot even as I write lyrics now. I read the newspapers a lot, and read books a lot, and study current society a lot. And now when I write lyrics, I get professional opinions from those like a feminist professor.”
He later shares that he still sends all of his lyrics to this women and gender studies professor, for them to "analyze objectively."
July 2016 — Korean feminist eAeon shares a thread on Twitter:
“Recently, Namjoon and I met privately and had a serious long talk about the issue of misogyny. Namjoon felt shame and guilt because of the controversy and revealed to me that he is distressed and unable to sleep due to it. So I said that misogyny is not a label or stigma that cannot be erased, but rather an obstacle in the right path that can exist within anyone. Rather than feeling like it’s unfair or painful, it’s a matter of deciding to fix it or not after discovering it within oneself. I talked about how I am also in the process of continuously fixing myself whenever I discover something I am lacking. Namjoon listened attentively and understood better than other people I have spoken to about similar topics.”
Oct 2016 — Namjoon writes the lyrics for the song "21st Century Girl," which includes (somewhat generic) uplifting lyrics such as “Tell them that you’re strong / Tell them you’re enough” and much more, with the whole song being along those lines. It’s fun, it’s cheesy, it's cute, it's entry level feminism, etc
Jan 2017 — Namjoon says in a live vlog:
“I’d never thought that my behaviors or words could hurt others. As I went through the year 2016, I started to think about that. My words or behaviors, regardless of my intentions, can cause trouble or hurt others feelings. I thought, I need to hold myself responsible for that and I need to think about such things. What I said and did can not be undone. I learned how to admit that to myself. It was hard to admit that I could hurt others’ feelings even if I don’t mean to. Now, when I start to do something, I think, how would people feel about my actions? Now, as I said, I feel much better about my feelings and emotions. Now when I hear something about myself, even if it’s criticism or condemnation, I think, what caused them to say this about me? What did I do wrong? What did I do to cause others to feel uncomfortable? I need to know how to change my way of thinking if it’s wrong.”
Jan 2017 — Namjoon posts a picture of a stack of books on his side table, and one is Breaking Out of the ‘Man Box’: A Call to Men, a book by Black male feminist and human rights activist Tony Porter, about “empowering men to create a world where men and boys are loving and respectful, and a human race where women and girls are valued and safe.”
Feb 2017 — BTS releases the music video for their song “Not Today.” The song is about the "underdogs" of society rising up and fighting back, and features a line about “shattering the glass ceiling that holds you down.” When asked if he knew what the phrase meant, Namjoon, who wrote the lyrics, said that he was fully aware of its meaning in feminism, as well as: “I wrote the lyrics to say let us, including BTS, not stay silent on social issues.” (Unrelated fun fact: the song is also heavily inspired by Aragorn's "but it is not this day" speech in Return of the King).
Sept 2017 — Namjoon shares a selfie where you can see he has a Marymond phone case. Marymond is a charity that financially supports former "comfort women," Korean women and girls who were abducted before and during WWII by Imperial Japan and forced into sexual slavery for Japanese soldiers.
Japan has refused to actually apologize to survivors, one Japanese politician said in 2014 that comfort women were "necessary for soldier morale," Osaka ended its sister city designation with San Francisco over a comfort women memorial in SF's Chinatown, many right-wing Japanese people view comfort women as lying sluts, etc. South Korea and Japan officially entered into an economic/trade war in 2019 due to Japan's refusal to give reparations to Korean comfort women.
March 2018 — Irene from Red Velvet says she read the book Kim Ji Young, Born 1982, which is about “the subtle hardships women endure” and is said to have “a clear goal of enlightening those oblivious to the gender discrimination that takes place everyday.” This caused a huge controversy, where Irene’s male fans burned pictures of her, said they now hate her, and essentially threw big temper tantrums because of her support of feminism.
Two days later, Namjoon does a live vlog just to say he also recently read Kim Ji Young, Born 1982, which he praises and calls “thought-provoking.”
(CONTEXT: Starting in the late 2010s and continuing now, incels and MRAs are a rising movement in South Korea, while feminism is viewed as evil and corrupting. In 2022, South Korea elected a proud anti-feminist as president, who ran on a platform specifically appealing to incels.)
July 2021 — Namjoon is seen reading the book Ways of Seeing, aka the book where the term “the male gaze” comes from. The book “criticizes traditional Western cultural aesthetics by raising questions about hidden ideologies in visual images,” and it is the origin of a famous quote about male artists and the male gaze: “You painted a naked woman because you enjoyed looking at her, put a mirror in her hand and called the painting ‘vanity,’ thus morally condemning the woman whose nakedness you had depicted for your own pleasure.”
Aug 2021 — Namjoon is put on a “feminist watchlist” by Korean incels — they made a list of “suspected,” “verified,” and “vanguard” feminists in Korean pop culture and politics, and put celebrities, politicians, and activists on their list accordingly, so they would know who to hate. Namjoon was listed here as a “verified feminist” and the incels said men should all boycott him due to his support of feminism. Namjoon is the only male idol included on this list.
Sept 2021 — BTS does an interview with South Korea’s then-President Moon (not the incel, but the guy before him), in conjunction with their UN work. BTS is asked to comment on misogyny, as they have a lot of female fans, and only Namjoon answers. He says:
“Personally, I received a lot of criticism regarding misogyny in 2015 and 2016, which led me to get my lyrics reviewed by a women’s studies professor. That experience, in turn, was an opportunity for me to self-reflect and question whether I’d been insensitive to gender equality. I want to do the best I can to take interest in this topic, learn, and make improvements.”
Him speaking about women's studies professors (some of the most controversial people in Korea right now) in a positive way, even just using the word "misogyny," and saying all this literally in front of a world leader caused quite a stir in South Korea.
Sept 2022 — Namjoon is asked to narrate the audio guide for the first-ever exhibition of modern Korean art in the West. Namjoon got to personally choose ten artists to feature in his audio guide, and for the first one (the most featured one), he chose Rha Hye-Seok, a painter who was also a writer and the founder of Korea’s feminism movement. In his narration, Namjoon describes how Rha died alone and in poverty, shunned by Korean society for advocating for women’s rights during Japanese Imperial rule.
Other artists he chose to include were Japanese Imperialism-era Korean resistance revolutionaries, as well as communists and North Koreans who were blacklisted in South Korea.
Mar 2023 — Namjoon talks about his love of art in an interview, and is asked if he invests in any art (“investing” in art collection = buying paintings just to sell them in the future when they’re worth more), and he says he just collects art for himself, but if he were interested in "investing and supporting," he would choose “Black artists, women, and emerging Indonesian artists.” (Namjoon chose to add the “support” part, turning the phrase around to mean uplifting instead of profiting off of.)
July 2023 — The members of BTS release a book describing their careers from pre-debut until now. Namjoon writes about the misogyny controversy from 2016, saying:
“I think it was something I needed to go through. About this kind of concept and awareness, I have come to think that as someone living in the 2020s, it’s something you come up against at least once. And because I was criticized early on, I could recognize the problem sooner. […] This was because I’d received clear comments and criticism about the raps I’d written as well as my views. The Gangnam Station murder [a misogynistic hate crime/femicide] happened around that time, and so from a woman’s perspective I think there was no choice but to speak out even more."
About the positive impact the misogyny controversy had, he also said: "If it wasn’t for that process, we wouldn’t have made it this far."
The book then mentions: “Gender sensitivity training is now obligatory for all HYBE artists before they can debut.”
PS, he's trans inclusive, so any terfs reading this can die I guess:
Sept 2018 — Namjoon speaks in front of the UN and says that all people “no matter who you are, where you’re from, your skin color, your gender identity” deserve to be able to “speak themselves,” something he defines as having confidence in and loving yourself.
May 2019 — BTS creates little animal cartoon characters to represent themselves, and then makes a video talking about them and answering fan questions. Hoseok is asked what gender his character Mang is, and Yoongi says: “I kind of want all of them to be gender neutral. I don’t want them to be classified into two gender groups.” All of the other boys nod and agree, particularly Jimin and Namjoon, who are verbal and enthusiastic/excited.
The video then has a short animation of Mang looking back and forth between the doors to two bathrooms, each labeled with traditional gender symbols, and then Mang bursts through the wall between the doors instead:
Aug 2022 — Namjoon shares a picture of a glass sculpture he bought for his home, made by Roni Horn, a "neither male nor female" queer activist and artist.
March 2023 — Namjoon shares a song rec, “Parody” by Yves Tumor. Yves Tumor is nonbinary and goes by they/them and he/him pronouns, and Namjoon chose to share this specifically on Trans Visibility Day.
April 2023 — Namjoon shares a picture on his IG story of the cover of the photobook The Ballad of Sexual Dependency by Nan Goldin, a bisexual Jewish activist and photographer who first rose to fame during the AIDS crisis. Her photobook is about humanizing addicts, drag queens, queer and transgender people, HIV positive people, etc.
Bonus stuff I wanted to include, because this is my post:
March 2017 — Namjoon and American rapper Wale release a song together, called “Change.” From Billboard’s review of the song: “In this unrestrained hip-hop track, the duo criticize the ‘alt-right,’ ‘racist police,’ and declare they have ‘no faith in the government.’”
May 2018 — Namjoon recommends the book Das Kapital by Karl Marx in a live vlog. That book is over 3,000 pages long and is about the importance of communism and socialism, capitalism's oppression and exploitation of the working class and all marginalized groups, how capitalism and imperialism go hand in hand, and more. Namjoon also says he wrote the BTS song "Paradise" about his views on capitalism in South Korea and how it leads to people overworking themselves to death.
May 2018 — Namjoon says in a press conference that he’d rewritten parts of BTS's song “Fake Love” for their performance at the BBMAs, to not include the words “I am” (nae-ga in Korean) or “you are” (ni-ga in Korean) specifically because they sound like the English n word, which he says is offensive and that Koreans shouldn’t say it.
He went on to say: “There are many people hearing the song for the first time, and when you are hearing parts like that as English, there is potential for misunderstandings to occur. To prevent that, we edited the lyrics.”
Oct 2018 — Namjoon has a million songs about mental health awareness, the suicidal thoughts and panic attacks he used to have in late 2015 and 2016, and his depression, but I especially recommend his album "mono," where every song marks a different place in his recovery and struggles with mental illness. In the live vlog for this album, he also became one of the only Korean celebrities to ever say he sees a therapist.
Feb 2019 — Namjoon shows off some of the art pieces he owns in a live vlog, including multiple pieces specifically about Free Palestine (all of his Palestine-related art is pro-Palestine). When talking about the art, he calls the country "Palestine."
Jan 2020 — Namjoon and the rest of BTS reveal “Connect BTS,” a global art project bringing attention to diverse visual artists around the world. BTS sponsored five 100% free art exhibitions and personally chose the artists themselves, and interviewed them to help bring mainstream attention to them. The main artist in the Berlin exhibition was Nigerian artist Jelili Atiku, whose work is about European colonialism in Africa.
April 2020 — Namjoon recommends the book Guns, Germs, and Steel, the groundbreaking book destroying all arguments in support of white supremacy, “stunningly dismantling racially-based theories of human history,” and “arguing against the idea that Europeans have any kind of intellectual, moral, or inherent genetic superiority.” Some people believe Europeans were able to colonize, enslave, and conquer the Americas/Africa because white people are superior, but this book says it was just luck, geography, the invention of guns, and immunity to diseases from Europeans not washing their asses.
Dec 2022 — Namjoon releases the song “Yun” featuring Erykah Badu, about the painter Yun Hyong-Keun. Besides painting, Yun was also an activist who protested against Imperial Japan and the Korean war, and was arrested and tortured multiple times throughout his life for standing against colonialism and imperialism, and later for being a Communist sympathizer.
Jan 2023 — Back in 2021, BTS's company HYBE announced they were going to sell BTS NFTs, but then literally never mentioned it again. In 2023, it was revealed that Namjoon himself had gone to HYBE headquarters and "gave a powerpoint presentation to HYBE's executive board" about how horrible NFTs are and how he didn't want them associated with BTS.
Feb 2023 — Namjoon shares another picture of his Free Palestine art, coincidentally (or not) on the very same day Israel bombed Damascus and killed nine civilians.
March 2023 — Namjoon in an interview: “Music is really necessary for the world, but when it comes to my own music, sometimes I feel that I am producing something unnecessary. If I died tonight, I don’t think anything would change. Some people may care, but a farmer or street sweeper are more relevant to the functioning of society.”
April 2023 — Namjoon shares a picture from his home, and in the background, an original political sketch from Philip Guston’s Poor Richard series is visible.
Philip Guston was a Jewish Communist who did a series of political sketches about how much he hated US president Richard Nixon — for anyone who doesn’t know, Nixon was a fascist conservative, and sort of the Trump of the 70s. He was hateful, racist, misogynistic, homophobic, he spoke nonsense and most centrists thought he was insane and would never get elected, he literally started the War on Drugs, etc. Guston’s sketches portray Nixon in a very grotesque way and are all about him and his cronies being evil and fucking over the whole world out of hatred and greed.
So, Namjoon owns a sketch by a Jewish Communist about hating and mocking fascist conservatives.
and lastly, Namjoon's two best outfits:
(the sweatshirt in the second one features a picture of Rick Owens, an openly bisexual fashion designer, wearing heels)
DISCLAIMER: the information I have included in this post will come with a link at the bottom of the post. These are my views and opinions only, it is not meant to target one specific person, but it's a critique on society in general. This post will discuss heavy topics and will contain the following triggers: Ousting, Hate Crimes on queer people, Mentions of homophobia, transphobia, and death. If some part seems incomplete, its because I had to take so many breaks during this post because it was really fucking heavy. Queer voices will thrive no matter what.
LET'S GET IT, GAYS!
Pride Month, what does it mean to you?. All around the world we celebrate at different months, and for me, at the very least, I love that - that every month, is pride month, that every month is a celebration for people to simply celebrate love.
I know capitalism has programed us to think that queer allyship is buying all rainbow things, to tokenize your gay friends/family members. and to make posts on social media about how someone's profile/account/blog is a queer safe space.
But is that allyship?
I pose this question because rarely do we talk about the meaning behind pride. Once the streamers come down, the rainbow flags are taken down, Gloria Gaynor's "I will survive" is turned off, and queer people go back their everyday lives, what happens then?. And I think for me, the after has always been important.
I've mentioned before that Stonewall was an act that was started by transgender women of color. Their strength and courage to defy and protest against homophobia and prejudice started a revolution that valiantly said "no longer will we allow you to silence us, we're here and we're queer".
This is the first post of an upcoming series meant to highlight the BIPOC queer activist that have shaped the world into what it is today. W
Marsha P. Johnson, and Sylvia Rivera - two women of color, from different backgrounds and heritage dared to dream of a world where queer people could be who they are and love who they want to love, despite gender.
They fought for a world where queer liberation was not only about acceptance, but to free ourselves from the chains that bound us down. Pride IS a celebration for us to be who we are but Pride at it's core is a protest
PRIDE HAS BEEN, AND WILL ALWAYS BE A PROTEST.
Pride is a reminder that we are still here, that we will always be here, and that until we have true intersectional equality, we will not rest. Because today, despite the inclusivity, despite the fact that many countries are making steps forward, we still face discriminations and we are still marginalized, and queer people are still being murdered at a dangerous rate.
The New York Times, stated on June 22, 2023 that more than 350 incidents had been reported of anti-LGBTQIA+ harassment, vandalism, and/or assault from June 2022-April 2023. And that's just reported incidents, it doesn't include the the things that have been not been reported. This doesn't include the bills that have been passed in the past year from the anti trans bill in Florida, to banning drag performances, to censoring curriculum in schools; Iowa imposing their "Don't say LGBTQ+" bill, as well as their bill that removes access to information/resources about HIV and AIDS. 530 Anti-LGBTQ bills have been proposed across the country just in 2023.
Read that again
530+ Anti-LGBTQIA+ bills have been proposed across the country in 2023 alone
And that is just in the US, a country that is supposed to be progressive and paving the way for queer liberation. Even here we are being eradicated and silences at an alarming speed.
and the reason I mentioned how retweeting a "my space is a safe space for queer people" reminds me of retailers, because every pride month, they change their storefronts into something queer friendly, to bring $$ in, to show how inclusive they are. But they're not, it's a ruse to get you to buy any and all rainbow shit, and they call it allyship.
I might just pin this so I can have a good laugh every time I see it
But it's all empty.
Just like retailers, we've been conditioned to believe that allyship ends with a simple reblog, because if the support starts and ends with reblog/product forefront, while completely ignoring queer lives then that type of support means nothing.
The perfect example of that is Target, at the beginning of the month they faced backlash for their Pride campaign, a campaign that showcased clothes, books and other things that were available for purchase. The backlash from the right was so severe that Target had to actually move all of their pride related products to another place in the store instead of the storefront, and some even went as far as removing the products entirely, from their designated stores.
And trust me, I understand why they did it - in their statement they mentioned that it had to do with the concern for their employees, and the threats they were receiving. It was volatile, although they tried to find a way to meet in the middle for both the perpetrators and the queer community, it left a really bad taste in our mouths and showed what many queer people have been talking about.
You see, for so long we have discussed how retailers have tried capitalized on us, they've shown a water dowered version of inclusion and allyship, and target was just another example of the performative support we constantly face. Because instead of standing up for queer rights, and standing up for a community they claimed to support, they instead moved their displays to a different part of the store - hidden from plain view, and instead of acknowledging that this is what constantly happens to queer people - being invalidated and trying to silence them, they instead caved and retreated when they couldn't handle it
And the thing is, I don't expect anything from capitalism, but it was a clear sign of the privilege companies and non queer people have. Heterosexual people have the choice to step back, to not show outwards support, they have the privilege to only use their voice when they deem it important, but the moment they see or experience even a grain of what Queer people experience, they retreat. And as I said, I get it, we have to protect ourselves, but if you can't protect queer people, then maybe don't come off like you can/do.
All of this is to say, that the past jikook community had a level head when it came to the hate. Because a lot of us were here to support a
I posted this a few days ago? A week a go, I think, where I highlighted the dangerous of spread hate online when it involved queer people. A LOT of people read that but didn't really understand the message I was trying to convey, and it was honestly laughable, because I wasn't surprised by the takeaway, what surprised me is that people didn't sit back and think about queer lives and how dangerous it still is for us to exists in this world. The response was very selfish "ME ME ME" and not "wow that's fucked up, what can we do". The fact that these two women, were brutally stabbed to death during the day, in a public space, and no one did anything is still something I find so surreal. Witnesses stood there and watched as it happened, and that is what my post explicitly highlighted. How we become desensitized to hate crimes and yet we do nothing about it, and why? What did these two women ever do to deserve this?. How can hate be this evil to take someones life.
But most importantly, how can we know crimes like these happen and yet it's just 1 in a sea of other crimes similar to this, and yet we do nothing.
One could say fear is what holds people back from standing up for queer people/anyone that is marginalized, and we watch these things happen because we fear for ourselves - we are a society that thinks singularly, and doesn't consider the fear others experience at the hands of homophobia and bigotry.
and the thing is when others call for help and affirmative action, what we should do is show up, no matter how small it may be, we should all be showing up, to protect and support one another, but you never really see that anymore, and when you do see it, it's critiqued and silenced. Not the stupid complaints online, I'm talking about Queer people asking for affirmative action so that we may protect their safe spaces, their lives, online and outside in real life, and yet it's ignored. and that to me is heartbreaking
Because queer people should not be silenced by heteronormaty, even if you are a heterosexual person as well, because of your privilege, you SHOULD use your voices to uplift, to support, you should be doing what YOU can to not let these things happen, and yet it's silence.
In the posts about all of these bills being passes and even the discourse on twitter, I always see one single comment repeated over and over "how is this even happening" and it's because people always look the other way. These atrocities towards queer people aren't things that happen overnight, it is a patter of suppression that builds and builds and builds until you find yourself with a verdict such as this one.
and people who see that and think "what's the big deal why can't they go elsewhere" don't comprehend that it's not about "forcing someone" to provide services, it's about the fact that it's a form of division.
And I'm not here to be like "christians and blah blah blah" because the conversation is bigger than this. Because it poses the questions of how are queer people differ than heterosexual people. We're all the same; our bodies, flesh, ligaments, brain are the same, and yet we create these walls and boundaries for queer people, simply because of how they identify and the people they love. By granting this win it says "you don't belong here"
and how is that different than what target is saying....
then where do we belong?. if we can't exist then what happens to us?.
we're only allowed to exist in spaces if heterosexual people say we can?. and when they don't like us, they take that away, and try to eradicate us?. if your heart isn't fucking breaking while reading that, then ask yourself why it doesn't.
I actually had to take a big pause after this section because I was reading the articles and trying to understand how we can live in a world like this.
I've got a section more to go and then I'll close it up with how this is a letter to Jikook.
I've had this point in my head for a long time now, and it's about the tokenization and the Microaggressions queer people experience by heterosexual people without them noticing.
And truly this isn't a "call-out" what this is a step in a direction where we see queer people, as people, and not the characterized versions people as we're often depicted as.
So what are microaggressions? Glad you asked!
Microaggressions are the everyday encounters of subtle discrimination that people of various marginalized groups experience throughout their lives. Some microaggressions are unconscious (i.e., the perpetrator doesn’t even know they did something) while some microaggressions may be unintentional (i.e., the perpetrator may be aware of their actions, but may not realize the negative impact they may have on people).
And the thing is I don't dislike hets for doing this without noticing it. It's easy to confuse allyship with microaggressions. And the best way that I can sum it up is when het people say "I can't be homophobic, my brother is gay" or "I can't be homophobic, my best friend is a lesbian", or "that's gay, and I can say that because friend from high school said it was ok"..........
EVEN if you have someone in your life who is queer, you CAN still be homophobic, that doesn't absolve you. It's not a blanketed motion, it's not a shield you can hide behind, you can't tokenize people when it benefits you, ESPECIALLY, if people point out the microaggressions.
For so long heterosexual women have used us as their token gay best friend, as if we're an accessory, or a supporting character in their life. They want to be accepted by the queer community but don't respect us for the people we are. They don't know that saying "my best friend is gay" is similar to "I can't be racist, my friend is ___ mention any non white person __". Those two things are the same thing.
I used to go to gay clubs back in my early 20's and I would see a heap of straight women coming to our spaces to and saying "oh my god this is so fun, I love gay people"........... and they treated us as if we were these things that were meant to be there for their entertainment, and look, I don't want to bash a person for a good time, but gay clubs are supposed to be a safe haven for us, not a space where people with privilege can come and look at us like we're zoo animals.
Because when they leave, they go back to their "normal lives" they live their heteronormative life without missing a beat, but we don't often have the same privilege. Not all of us can be open about our relationship, not all of us can celebrate an engagement, and not all of us have the privilege of not being harassed simply because we love someone.
There is a disconnect there, because our world doesn't just stop being unsafe. I think of it as the opposite, because what would it be like if a bunch of gay guys go to a straight club to party and celebrate their engagement, to dance and say "oh my god, I love straight people, they're so fun", it sounds like a good time right?. But unfortunately that's not always the scenario, because if queer men went to a straight club, they'd be harassed and ridiculed and probably threatened.
Straight people are allowed to exist in our spaces, but we are not allowed to exist in theirs - and theirs is the entire world.
I have seen straight people use their token gay friend/family members/acquaintance as a way to push back when queer people point out these micro-aggressions, and instead of just accepting it and learning, they instead take that and harass them for even voicing their opinion. They take offense to queer people for pointing out the facts.
Being an ally isn't just having a queer person in your life, just like racial justice support is not just having a BIPOC in your life, it's about actually showing up, even if its unpopular, ESPECIALLY if its an unpopular stance from what society says. Because YOUR voice, despite it being a heterosexual one, is more privileged than mine.
How are we meant to create safe spaces for our children, for our generations, for our family members, for our friends, for the people we love, and for the people we encounter if we don't stand for what's right? If we don't use our voices to protect queer spaces, people and lives, then who will?.
How can we make safe spaces for people if heterosexual people only see us as an idea instead of people.
Which brings me to Jikook
I'm almost done, I promise.
Ok, so Jikook
Since I first joined Tumblr I have made it my mission to not only support Jungkook and Jimin, but to differentiate myself from a community. Not because "I'm not like other blogs" LMFAOO, no, I did it because I saw a disproportion in the people who were not queer and the way they saw Jungkook for Jimin.
To me, it's never been about followers or all of the stupid bullshit that happens in these spaces, for me queer support has always been my #1 priority. There's countless posts I've made (the serious ones, not the chaotic ones) where I've touched on their bonds and the way I see them, and how to me, they're different.
And I've always stated that I support Jungkook AND Jimin, and I made them individuals because even if they're not together, my eyes can differentiate people who are queer and people who are not. And look I'm not saying they 100% they are, but ME, I, MY OWN INDIVIDUAL PERSON, I know what I see based on my personal experiences. And I try and do a check-in with myself everyone once in a while (as I've mentioned several times before) because I don't want to be the type of person that solely bases their opinion on past experiences, because I fear of projecting.
But for me there's always been something so pure about Jungkook and Jimin's bond. I see them, and the only thing that crosses my mind is "how do we protect them".
Because people often forget that they're POC men from a country that is homophobic, and they are men who are often targeted because they are so private. People see them through a lens of western paparazzi, and think that they have some sort of ownership to their lives, and their privacy just because we're fans.
People aren't things you own, or covet, they aren't things for you to make up fake scenarios to satiate your curiosity. Queer people, don't exist for heterosexual women to fetishize and fantasize what their queer relationship is like. And queer people aren't here for you to get away from the things you're dealing with, we're not toys, or entertainment, our lives are valid and very real.
And yes, they are entertainers and performers, but their privacy is theirs alone. We have to respect their own time. And yet, those things are never connected to our own real life.
But I digress
a few days ago I made a post about my coming out story, I was honest as I could be, and I discussed that although my family was very accepting of my identity and my partners, I had actually been outed at a very young age. I spoke about how I disassociated, the harassment and violence I experienced at school, and how I took all of that silently, without ever expressing what I was going through.
And it wasn't until I was out of high school, when I knew I would NEVER see any of those people again (except the close friends I made back them, which we're going on our 20 year anniversary of friendship) - that I finally decided to come out to my family.
AND the thing is I should have known that my parents would have loved me no matter what. But the trauma I endured during that time, made me doubt if my parents would love me and accept me. In my post I spoke about my parents, how they have been so fucking supportive of my siblings and I (we're all gay ayyyyyy lol). They constantly check in on us, my dad even took a fucking, LGBTQIA+ class, and then continued to attend college to learn more about representation and how a better ally.
It is because of them that I am here today.
and I know a lot of people don't have that privilege, a lot of people don't have that experience, and although I was incredibly naive early on because of the fact that my parents never had us abide by gender normality, I grew up with a heart full of love.
I don't fault my parents for sheltering me in that way, because although I did trust the wrong people, it never jaded me.
I've always said "a hell bent heart didn't break me"
because it's true.
I am proud to be queer, and I'm proud to be out
but I realize that people don't get that, and having that choice at such an early age stripped from me made me realize a lot of things.
I don't want Jikook to ever come out, not unless it's by their own choice. I go to bed every fucking night and pray to the universe, the deities, my personal beliefs, to protect them and to keep them from harm.
Because I wouldn't ever want that to be something they go through. They deserve to have that choice, they deserve to have that option, and wishing for them to be outed just so we can feel safe in a relationship that isn't ours is selfish and fucking hateful.
Because it lacks the awareness of what that can do to a person, to a couple, to people, it removes the reality of what that will look like, and it fantasizes queer lives.
Our lives aren't a movie, or a fanfic, or a cute love story, there are consequences we do face simply because of the people we choose to love.
And sometimes I lay awake at night and wonder what can I do to make this world safe for them?. What can I do so that my fellow queer people can live their life without fear. What can I do so that my community knows what it feels like to be accepted without judgement.
Thats what plagues my mind, not what someone who doesn't even know me thinks about me.
I've been misgendered twice now in this space, I've been ridiculed and have experienced discrimination and racism, and some would think I'm stupid to be here still, but.....
no one knows of the countless messages I get from people who share their stories with me through the DM's, they don't know the queer asks I get that are often just used as a way for people to share their experiences with me. Not a single person knows what it's like to have to read messages from people, who you've never met in person, but who trust you enough to share a part of themselves.
I don't stay here for the hateful fucking idiots in these spaces, I am still here because if I don't then who will actually advocate for queer people?.
Who will actually care for Jungkook and Jimin as people instead of just an idea of them. If I don't stay then who am I leaving behind.
It's not egotistical - or something stupid as "people need me" LMFAOOOOOO.
no, it's if I let hate win then what do I gain from that?
If I allow the bullies I've always had in life continue to silence queer voices, and take a choice away from me, then what.
I am here to ask for advocacy outside of a queer ship people refuse to see for who they are.
I am here to ask for advocacy and what can we do to make this world a safe place for queer people.
What do we need to do, in terms of legislation, support, impact to protect not jungkook and jimin from homophobia, but how do we protect our community?.
I don't want to live in a world of "what if's" or "maybes". I want to live in a world where ANY queer person can be free to be themselves, & I want every single queer person to have a choice and not be discriminated for it.
That's what I want
when I say im not here for any of you, and I'm here for myself, thats what I mean.
I love Jungkook and Jimin, I love their bond, I love how they care for one another, and I care for who they are as individuals and for who they are when they are together.
And when I sign out of these spaces, I try to keep my promise of protecting them by trying to find ways to make the world a safe place. I try to educate myself because I hope there isn't a day where they are left to fend for themselves.
I am here and I will continue to be here, because being queer, being here for my fellow queer people is a protest against any kind of hate. NO matter what, you can't eradicate queer people. I refuse to let heteronormative win. fuck hateful straight people, and fuck their hate, go eat some glass and stop attacking queer people.
And so I ask you once again
What does Allyship mean to you, what does Pride mean to you? because to me, pride month is every month, unless you're a homophobe.
But more importantly, how can we protect these two, in a manner that doesn't harm them, in ways that their rights are respected. How can we protect the people we love and support, how can we protect their bond, and how can we protect them to know that there is NOTHING WRONG WITH WHO THEY LOVE.
How can we protect queer people from hate?. surely it can't be more hate right?.
I posted that the song I listened to earlier was lady gaga's born this way, and that I cried when that came on I cried a little because how of intense this post was.
But the entire time I edited, re-wrote and made changes to this post since that song played, my singular thought was
I WAS BORN TO SURVIVE. I WAS BORN TO BE BRAVE. BABY I WAS BORN THIS WAY.
I love those funky little guys. Thats what I mean when I say I'm going to choose Jikook > any of you. Because I'm here for my community, no evil formed against me will prosper. I thought I told y'all I'm one of the universes favorite child.
JIKOOK FOREVER BECAUSE LOVE ALWAYS WINS!!!.
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I’m not gonna lie, that Supreme Court decision really bummed me. I feel like crying in all honesty because the ramification of this decision are so big…
Thank you for writing this, I still feel like shit but at least I don’t feel abandoned. There is always hope as long as we don’t stop fighting, in whichever way you can as it is indeed very dangerous for some makes sense. 🏳️🌈
And just to bring home how serious this all is even in a "safe" and "2SLGBTQ+-friendly" place like Canada, my community is reeling from a stabbing last week at the University of Waterloo of a prof and two students in a gender studies class, with investigation revealing it was a hate-motivated attack related to gender expression and identity. Those attacking progressive pedagogy as "woke" but at the same time framing academic freedom/freedom of speech without concern for the dignity and safety of all are heading down a dangerous path...
The man who stabbed three people at the University of Waterloo was motivated by hate and broadly targeted the LGBTQ community, Waterloo poli
Will Forever be the Captain of this “Ship.” I wish every supporter of Jikook today could have been in the fandom 5 years ago. Could have had the pleasure of waking up on November 8th to this beautiful declaration of love! Jikook have given us so much since then But this for the moment takes the cake!
I joined the fandom in 2015 closer to 2016. I was barely in the fandom two weeks before being pretty convinced that Jikook were more than friends ( I can go into detail later about that). I remember constantly being torn between certainty and uncertainty because while jikook were questionable pre 2017, they were still more subtle. However, 2017 was a crescendo, every month getting a tad bit louder…we all knew something was on the horizon and then September hit and JK had a breach in his security and his itinerary was leaked. This sent the fandom into overdrive. Half the fandom scrambling to rid the internet of this info, and the other half torn between letting their curiosity get the best of them and shutting down sesange gossip. However, regardless of where one stood, if you were active in the fandom at all during this time you heard the rumors, you saw the itinerary, you learned about the gossip–JK and JM were going to Tokyo in October for JM’s birthday and JK paid for it. I remember trying hard to not talk about it or think about it. It could very well be a lie and it wasn’t right how we came to learn about it! Bloggers overall did a good job of shutting down discussions on this topic so there was silence on it…until there wasn’t.
Jimin’s birthday comes and goes and no trip. This leaves many to forget the rumors all together. Then October 28th hits and the below pictures are shared.
The whole fandom is going crazy! Jungkook and Jimin are in fact heading to Tokyo. They were spotted at Busan International Airport and seen off by their families. No one wants to say it but we are all thinking it…the rumors were true…and that was a legit sesange.
Every day they are gone we are being shown picture after picture of their time in Tokyo. And I remember thinking…Did JK really pay for all this…did he truly do this for JM’s birthday?!?!
Then the trip was over…the fandom was still recovering from the news that JM and JK literally went on vacation together and it was an all expense paid trip…paid for by none other than JK. Then JM drops another bomb.
The fandom is sent back into overdrive…we could just see the pink aura around them! And it made all of us crazy because we couldn’t believe this was all happening and we were getting to experience it in real time.
And just as we were thinking we are in heaven…JM post his clips of their trip together. We are sent again into party celebration mode.
When I tell you 2017 was the year, it was the year!!! It was day after day of being hit with something new. But just when we thought we were done the crescendo of the year reached it’s peek…JK drops GCF in Tokyo. And there was a short quiet.
There was a quiet stillness because while most of us believed Jikook were a couple, we had resolved ourselves to the fact that we could be wrong. GCF Tokyo changed all that.
I remember watching it over and over and over again thinking…OH MY! This is real…I’ve always felt it was real but this…this makes me know it’s real. It was a quiet but loud realization that reverberated across the fandom. Jungkook is in LOVE LOVE with Jimin. For a moment I thought this was their coming out video…because who could watch this and question Jikook at all! Was this it! Was this their way of telling the world who they love?
While many still found a way to discredit GCFT, I think it was in a way JK’s way of declaring his love to JM, declaring it to anyone that would listen. I believe most of Korea heard it and we heard it! November 8th was the day my certainty turned into assurance. It is one of the most beautiful films and every time I watch it I am in awe of JK’s boldness. My heart melts thinking of JM’s reaction to seeing it for the first time. How loved he must have felt! How surprised…he must have cried so much!
When they returned they kept surprising us. Every year since 2017 has been a little louder. I think GCFT showed them that they could get away with a lot. That they could be a glass closet…they could be loud and people still would feign ignorance or deny it. It gave them a degree of freedom to be themselves without fear of the repercussions. If people weren’t convinced by GCFT they will never be convinced!
It's almost a year from when chapter 2 was announced and since then so much has happened. And we often talk about BTS' message, and what they stand for, but their message isn't a singular one. If we were to say in a nutshell, what their message encompasses is "Love Yourself".
But it's more than that, because what does loving yourself mean?. It's different for everyone.
Because loving yourself could mean, not having a dream, and living your life content/happy without the pressure of constantly being told that you have to live your life with 1 passion, that if you don't have a dream it means you're directionless. Loving yourself can mean that you can simply just be.
Loving yourself could also mean finding a community that makes you feel seen, understood, and loved. It can mean finding your chosen family, or finding people that make you feel safe and valued. Because that love you accept is then reflected in the love you give.
Loving yourself can also mean giving yourself the opportunity to just be, to allow yourself to be kind to yourself, to be sad, to go through the emotions in life, to give yourself some grace. We give people the space and time to grow and process, and we forget that we deserve the same as well. Sadness, just like happiness, grief, and euphoria, are all moments come and go, allowing us to experience life to its fullest. Knowing that even if we have bad days, like the wind, they'll go and better day's will come.
Loving yourself can be growing from your mistakes, to grow from prejudice and the ignorances we don't often notice we are part of. It's allowing yourself to do better, to be better, not for anyone else, but for yourself. It can mean acknowledging the person you used to be and not letting those mistakes be the mark of the kind of person you are. That there are no regrets, just lessons learned.
Loving yourself can mean self acceptance. To love yourself wholly, for who you are, for your imperfections, for the things that make you different, because those things are what make you unique, singular, no one else is like you. It means putting yourself first, being a little selfish, knowing your worth. It's about living and loving for yourself. It's an epiphany
BTS music is there to heal you, to comfort you, to make you laugh, smile, dance, cry, and find peace in the fact that you've found kindred spirits.
Namjoon once said "If we helped your dream and your life a bit by our existence, our music, our performance, our pictures or videos, even if it’s not big, if we could reduce your pain from 100 to 99, 98 or 97, that makes our existence worthy."
That is what BTS' message is about.
I love BTS not only for who they are as people, but because of their constant transparency and vulnerability to openly talk about things that everyone experiences, yet aren't willing to open up about.
Their message is simple, but vast. Calm like ripples in water, but deep like the ocean.
What does loving yourself mean?. What is it about BTS that made you gravitate to them?.
For me it's always been their music, because it's not just sounds, notes, beats, words composed together, it's about the soul and heart that are carried in those compositions.
BTS aren't perfect, and in their music they let us know they aren't, and they open themselves up in hopes that we can make the world a little better. Because despite the imperfections, we deserve love.
How many are willing to hold their hand and go on this journey together?.
"I wish there were better words than love, but really, truly, I love you.
When I say "I know who my BTS are" that's what I mean. They feel like old friends, they feel like comfort when I need it, they feel like peace, they feel like home.
For me, yesterday, today, tomorrow, the future, there will only be BTS.
Oh, Polyc gave an interview in which he talked about BTS's friendship tattoos.
He also talked about how long it took him to fix the existing tattoos that Jungkook had and how at that time he was talking about the friendship tattoos that the group wanted to get and how Jimin finally said: let's get tattooed! haha.
Polyc also confirmed that it was Jungkook who asked him to "sign" his arm.
He also talked about how after a conversation with Jimin where he encouraged him and gave him some advice, he decided to be a better person.
From the way he talks about them, it is obvious that Polyc has a close relationship with Jimin and Jungkook. He is definitely their go-to tattoo artist.
Polyc at first glance seems to be a very respectful and friendly person. A bit shy too, but maybe he is just not used to cameras. Honestly, I understand why Jimin and Jungkook seem to trust him so much.
Amid the festa anticipation, a news item dropped today...
A marriage equality bill has been proposed to parliament in South Korea by a minor opposition party member but co-sponsored by 12 others across all major parties. This is important because it means it is not seen as a partisan issue (although the Guardian journalist speculates it is unlikely to pass and surveys show opposition to gay marriage around 52%).
LGBTQ+ rights are affected by all kinds of legal provisions - from the most violent in the outright criminal prohibition of sex acts, to marriage, accepted grounds of non-discrimination, insurance, access to IVF (another bill in the proposal addresses this), next of kin in hospitals, adoption and parental status on civil documents, and legal reform can be very piecemeal because of this (one brick at a time, often)... Social acceptance (through religious figures, media, popular culture etc) and legal reform are linked in a complex dynamic, but at least having this debate in parliament will tend to show up the weakness of many of the counter-arguments, especially the one that the law must wait for, not try to lead, social consensus around divisive issues.
The article:
Symbolic bill sponsored by cross-party group of lawmakers is hailed a ‘historic moment’ in fight for marriage equality
Remember When I Said Taehyung Might Not Be As Gay As We Thought?
Don't judge a man by his milfy wardrobe, he looks goooood.
It was... awhile ago. Maybe as far back as 2021 although I do not feel like link-searching it. It's in the archives if I didn't kill it.
Granted, there was a lot going on, then. There's still a lot going on and until now I had no desire to ever - EVER - return to this hellsite. Because Taekookers are fucking weird, yo.
And some of y'all got a lil bit up in my shit too as I (fuzzily) recall. Which: it's whatever. I'm extremely unsocial, don't even answer my own DMs. And it's not personal, so I get it. I don't need or want to defend myself, but I will protect people I care about. With my absence, if necessary.
OT: I also totally kicked the big C while I've been out so that was nice. Yoongi the cat is pleased that his noms will continue uninterrupted. I will be in wigs for at least another year. It's all good.
Oh LOOK at what we have here. Don't come at me for publishing this, I will explain.
I got it from actual media days ago, okay, and also: there was no expectation of real privacy. Keep reading. Or don't, I'm not telling you what to do.
ANYWAY. I had to come back, mainly to say TAENNIE IS REAL I TOLD Y'ALL IDK WHY NOBODY EVER BELIEVES ME BUT HERE WE ARE. I'm gloating. Honestly, it's so rude, I'd apologize if I cared. But I am rude and snorfling into my cheerios about this. Tae just made me so damn happy, is all.
LET THE MAN BE BI OR HETEROFLEXIBLE OR EVEN STRAIGHT IDC. Jennie clearly makes him happy. Look at his "I'm going to Paris to see my girlfriend" face!
And in that very specific jewelry look, no less. Foundrae. Again. Still. Hm.
Here's what I can tell you based on my limited third hand no sources no receipts this is probably utter bullshit usual disclaimer:
It's a soft open, kids. This whole "oopsie we just so happened to get caught taking a lil walk in public with our managers in tow during which date at least one of us signed several autographs, what a surprise" is in fact a soft open for what will likely be a public confirmation PRETTY DAMN SOON.
It might happen before I get this thing published, actually, depending on when I get it up. If it's before May 22 at noon my time, no idea. If after, well. Guess we'll see. Jennie's supposed to show up at the screening of HBO's The Idol that day, screening at the Grand Lumiere at 10:30 CEST. One wonders if she will arrive alone, or bring a plus one. It's a big ask, and if he does it they're probably getting married, that's how big a deal it would be. So I'm not holding my breath, but.
This seems like a reasonable prospect for a plus-one viewing. Might not be the only one but... Jennie's IN IT so.
I'M NOT SAYING THIS IS GONNA HAPPEN. I think it would be a fucking POWER move if it did, but I also do not necessarily expect that it will. It COULD. It... MIGHT. It might not. Either way they're a thing, I'm telling you. They are, have been, a thing. For awhile. And it is apparently quite serious - like up to and including talk of engagement serious.
Remember when a bunch of folk thought that one gummy bear dude was going to jail for "hacking" Jennie's phone only there's been no actual movement on any "investigation"? Yeah. Trickle truthing, they call it. Give 'em a little bit, let them deny it and yell and chew on it for awhile before you give 'em a little more. But c'mon, nobody's wearing half the love-themed couple pieces at Foundrae for no damn reason.
Seriously they got the whole collection almost and both have been seen wearing them almost exclusively. For a year.See airport pic above.
Look, I don't have inside info on Taehyung. I do not. I ain't hang with his friends and I don't know him personally. Never met the guy. But I know a PR move when I see one and this is exactly that.
We all know how toxic stan culture can be. Some ToadlicKKers (and a few of us house elves) are certifiably bonkers, if stan twitter is anything to go by. And the guys, the company, they expect a whole meltdown. They know this is not gonna make half their fans happy. I mean the tkkers have a point in that it looks like they wanted to be seen. BECAUSE IT'S A SOFT OPEN.
What Taejen/Taennie/Jenhyung and the companies also know is that based on historic shipper behavior, this is gonna come back on Jimin, Jungkook, maybe Rose' and Lisa. And by extension, the other members. Maybe not as much due to their respective distance, but still. I bet by the time I finish this it will have already started.
Oh look there it is. Fuck those bitches, really.
Good LORDT. I'm not adding the audio, if y'all are that hungry for psycho hose beast Jimin hate hie thee to stan twt.
But, totally off-topic kinda...
... wouldn't it be cool if Jennie, who speaks great English, was hanging out with Troye Sivan and was like "so you know my boyfriend tells me that his bffs..." I'M JUST SAYING NETWORKING IS COOL AND FRIENDS OF FRIENDS GET THINGS DONE OKAY.
You know that girl has the scoop. If Tae knows it, she knows it. Oh heeeeyyy Troye.
Also OT: I love that Taekook have been hanging out a little more lately. It's refreshing. I genuinely think having Jennie in his life has been good for Tae in several ways.
And you know, I'm kinda surprised Taennie has lasted this long. I didn't honestly think they would. It warms my decrepit, sad old heart a bit. Turns out I have a lot more to say so IDK IDK, if I feel okay about it I might be back.
Right now I'm just waiting for the official Taennie nod and the continued total meltdown.
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