if you love me

you love me in a way i don't understand effie pucey | 17 | gryffindor

[opheliapucey]

ophelia pucey ft. halloween costume - red rising hood

[opheliapucey]

evanparkinscn·:

“Well I currently live with Dom and Lys, but if you needed a place to stay I could start looking into places to move in with you. I feel bad staying with those two anyways since they should be living their best married lives without me breathing over their shoulders all the time,” he admitted softly. “But regardless, you won’t have nothing. Your friends will be there to back you up,” Evan promised. “I can’t guarantee Graham will understand, but if he loves you he’ll make an effort to understand as much as he can. And even if he doesn’t fully understand, he’ll still do his best to help you out however he can.”

“I can’t ask that of you. Of anyone.” She sighed and rubbed at her face, trying to get rid of the tears that just kept falling. “I can’t ask people to support me that much. I don’t have any money of my own. At all.” She took a deep breath, trying to compose herself. “And I can’t handle losing Graham.”

[opheliapucey]

evanparkinscn·:

“I know, Effie, I know,” he murmured softly, reaching to put an arm around her, the other stroking her hair. “But while I can’t promise you their love, I can promise you mine. And Verity’s. And Alek’s. And so many others because there are so many people who love you. We may not be your family by blood, but hell you could stop loving me and I’ll always love you, Effie,” Evan promised, holding her a little tighter as she sobbed quietly. “Maybe… maybe you don’t have to,” he added. “Have you ever considered legally unbinding yourself from them? That way whatever they say or do means nothing. You make your own rules and you call the shots?”

She leaned into him when his arm wrapped around her, clearly desperate for the comfort he was offering. Her tears only left more rapidly when he said he’d always love her, the very idea of love being so freely given so strange to her and so painful to even consider. His suggestion made her frown a little and she looked up at him. “Then I wouldn’t have anything. Nowhere to live. And what if Graham doesn’t understand?”

[opheliapucey]

evanparkinscn·:

Listening to Ophelia speak about her parents definitely stirred up some stuff inside him. Although he didn’t have the same situation going on back at home, he definitely knew about how harsh getting any sort of approval from pureblood elitist parents could be. It was one of the reasons he and his sister had settle for their mother instead of their father. At least their mother could be reasoned with from time to time. Evan reached out to take Ophelia’s hand, giving it a squeeze as he rested their hands on the bar. Not letting it go, he looked to her even though she wasn’t looking at him, “That’s unhealthy, Effie. I know it seems like the only way out, but it’s not. You have another choice. You can choose to realize your parents are fucked up. If they don’t love or care for you, that’s on them. They’re foolish. But you don’t have to try and live up to their expectations. You don’t need their validation. I know it feels like you do, Ef. But you don’t.” Evan could feel tears pooling up in his eyes a bit, but he kept going, “You can accept validation from the people who do care about you. Your friends. We’re your family. The family that matters. Blood isn’t the strongest bond,” he argued, hoping at least a glimpse of this would get through to her. He wanted her to know that he would never abandon her. “It’s hard but you need to let their opinions go and live the life you want to live. Fuck what they think and do what you want. Do what makes you happy.”

“I just want them to love me. Even a fraction of how much they love Graham.” She sobbed, leaning into Evan, desperately looking for comfort. She took a couple of deep breaths, wiping her eyes. “I don’t know what to do.” She  sighed heavily. “I know I love Alek. But I don’t know how to stand up to my parents.”

[opheliapucey]

evanparkinscn·:

“You deserve to choose your wife or husband for yourself too, Effie,” he insisted, looking to her with even more concern in his gaze. It was obviously something was up. Something more than usual. “I know having a surname like ours is a tough burden to bear, but you don’t have to give in to that. While Annie and I chose our mum’s surname after the divorce, we still don’t really adhere to it. Mum’s tried to betroth us but after hearing how terrible we are at listening to some of the rules and requirements expected of a member of the Sacred Twenty-Eight like we are, they would decline. Annie and I decided that was not the life we wanted to live and we fought for that. You deserve to fight for what you want too.”

She sighed, silent for a long moment before something, probably the vast amount of alcohol she’d consumed, inspired her to be truthful. To say things she had tried to never say out loud before. “My parents don’t love me.” She wasn’t looking at Evan, blinking away any tears in her eyes. “And I’ve always thought if I just do better, do more, they’re going to love me. But I got prefect and they didn’t care, we won the Quidditch cup, they didn’t care, I have perfect damn grades and they don’t give a shit about me.” She bit hard on her lip. “I just want them to love me, Ev. They’re my parents. They’re meant to love me. Maybe marrying who they want instead of being with Alek will make me miserable, but if it makes them love me, maybe it’s worth it.”

[opheliapucey]

octxvixcolemxn·:

“Okay,” Octavia replied with a nod, grateful that she wasn’t fighting it. She did not need to lose any more friends, “I guess you don’t wanna talk about it so how about we just get drunk instead? If you get enough drinks in me, I might tell you about my relationship drama. Though I don’t know if I’d call it drama just yet but knowing me it’ll get there. Who knows, maybe it’ll be a good distraction.”

She was glad that Octavia didn’t want to stop them being friends. She didn’t have many friends as it was, she couldn’t afford to lose any. “I always want to hear about anyone else’s drama.” Effie attempted a smile, ordering more drinks for the both of them.

[opheliapucey]

evanparkinscn·:

Putting all jokes aside, Evan’s lips formed into a thin line as he thought about what she had just said. “This is serious, isn’t it?” he spoke up, looking at her and immediately feeling a lump in his throat. He was expecting his mother to owl him at any given moment and tell him he was to show up for his own wedding in a few weeks without much notice, so her words definitely hit close to home. “Are you sure about this?”

“I’m serious that my parents are looking for a husband for me.” She replied softly with a slight shrug. “But not that we should get married. You deserve to be able to choose your wife or husband for yourself.” Effie sighed, swallowing. “I just don’t know what to do.”

[opheliapucey]

octxvixcolemxn·:

“A year ago I would have said the same but look at me with Cassandra now,” Octavia replied and then shook her head too, “I’m not gonna let my friendship with him affect my friendship with him. If I could do with Gigi and Skye, I can do it with you and Alek so I’m not opting out.”

“Okay.” She replied simply, sighing and pushing a hand back through her hair. She didn’t want to talk about Alek, she had almost entirely given up on anything happening there. She had a duty to her family and that wasn’t something they could work through.

[opheliapucey]

jcmesxcshcroft:

“It’s fine, it was a while ago.” He shrugged at the other, furrowing his brows when the other said she didn’t think it was going to get any better, because his mind was wandered to try and think about what had happened to her. “Sorry to hear that though.”

“Still, I’m sure that doesn’t make it easier. I know I’d hate for anything to happen to my brother.” She smiled a little, sipping her drink.

[opheliapucey]

octxvixcolemxn:

“Stupid immature thing? Are you talking about a relationship? Those aren’t exactly the words people use to describe one,” Octavia was confused and hurt, “Are you saying we can’t be friends because you and Alek aren’t together anymore?” She loved Alek to pieces and she hated when people had a problem with their friendship.

“Yeah other people’s relationships maybe. But I was never made for a relationship, so it was stupid of me to pretend.” She shook her head, wiping her eyes. “No, not at all. We can still be friends. I just wanted to give you the option. I can understand why you’d not want to be friends with me.”

[opheliapucey]

evanparkinscn:

Evan had been sipping on his drink and nearly spat it out at her sudden question. “I’m sorry did you just– married? Look I know I was good in bed but I didn’t think you were that into me.”

“I mean the sex was pretty good, but I’m asking you purely platonically.” She replied, silent for a moment. “My parents are trying to arrange my marriage. They wouldn’t say no to a Parkinson and I actually like you.”

[opheliapucey]

halcyon-lockhart:

“Oh, well, I would hardly say you’d look aggravating. Just that the eyelash would be. And an eyelash could hardly drowned out your good looks. It’s just–oh, it’s one of those things where it’s out of place, you know? So you want to amend the error. Like a crooked photograph. Still beautiful, but not quite perfect.”

“You’re really laying it on thick today, aren’t you?” She asked with a slight smile, pushing her hair back. “Still, thanks for the help.”

[opheliapucey]

whysosirius-james:

“I know I’m not your captain but I thought we were friends.”

“I’m pretty sure the only things you know about me are regarding Quidditch. So I don’t think that makes us friends.”

[opheliapucey]

veritynctt:

“While you have every right to be pissed – you don’t have any right to be pissed at me,” Verity insisted with a little glare towards her friend. She understood that Effie wasn’t herself, but Verity wasn’t one to let herself be walked over either. “I love you, very much. But don’t treat me like I don’t matter because something else is eating away at you.”

“Verity I want to be alone. So leave me alone. I’m not going to force myself to act in a way I’m not feeling when you’re the one insisting on attempting it. I don’t want to see any human. I want to be alone in my despair.”

[opheliapucey]

evanparkinscn:

“While I’m glad the alcohol will be able to cure you for a while, is there anybody I should beat up to help you feel better in the longterm? You know I’d kick someone’s ass for you if you asked me to.”

“No, there’s no bad guy to beat up this time, there’s nothing you can do...” She trailed off as a thought came to her head and she turned to look at him. Effie was quiet for a few moments before speaking. “Actually. Do you want to get married?”

[opheliapucey]

halcyon-lockhart:

“I hope you don’t mind,” Halcyon said, taking a step closer. Once he had closed the gap, he lifted his nimble finger and quickly swiped under his companion’s eye. On his finger rest a single eyelash. “That was absolutely aggravating to look at. Make a wish?” A smirk tugged at one side of his mouth, an eyebrow lifted–almost like he was telling them a secret.

Effie blinked in slight surprise, eyes moving down to the offending eyelash and raising an eyebrow slightly. “I’ll let you keep this wish, seeing as you saved me from looking aggravating all day.” She replied with a smile, meeting his eyes.

[opheliapucey]

veritynctt:

“Alright well then I guess we’re going to be alone together,” she replied, turning her gaze from Ophelia to look out straight as well.

“Whatever.” She replied, downing her drink and signalling that she wanted another one.