what scares you most about becoming a dad?
Nothing, I’m pretty sure I’ve got this dad thing in the bag already.
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@orionambrosius
what scares you most about becoming a dad?
Nothing, I’m pretty sure I’ve got this dad thing in the bag already.
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: SO TINY. SO BREAKABLE. And flammable, too!
Baz: Speaking of dads, haven't found mine yet so that's fun. So I'm still an orphan AND single. Looks like we've had pretty opposite summers. 😅
Orion: FLAMMABLE?
Orion: Oh yeah, remind me after something happens to Walt again to try out some of my dad's locator spells. But you're single?? Dude what happened?
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: Oh, whoa. Wild, man.
Baz: Well...congratulations! Wow, a baby. A dad! I'm gonna be best friends with a DAD. Are you scared?
Orion: Yup!
Orion: Thanks dude. Are you kidding? I'm TERRIFIED! I'm going to be a DAD! To a tiny breakable baby!
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: DUDE!!!!!!!!!
Baz: WHAT THE HELL!!! Congratulations but omg that's huge! How did it happen? Like obviously I know how it happened but like.....why
Orion: DUDE I KNOW!
Orion: Apparently Pose was taking her birth control wrong the whole time and that was like all we were doing so...yeah.
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: ummmmm.....so I follow Posey on Instagram.
Baz: is that what I think it is or did you guys just feed her really well out in Camelot?
Orion: If what you think is that I'm going to be a dad in a few months, then yup! It's what you think it is.
Orion: Surprise!
“Lovely day for a Haunted House trip, eh?” Orion asked awkwardly, sidling up to Posey at the entrance of the Haunted house. It was probably the worst way he’d ever greeted anyone in his entire life. But after months of not speaking because of the whole “listening to her possibly murderous brother and distancing himself from her right when things in their friendship were starting to move in a very 👀 direction” thing, asking about haunted houses was the best he could do. “I’ve never really been much of a fan of these kinds of things really, but I guess if there was a day to visit one, this. Would. Be. It.”
Posey had been scrolling away on her phone, trying to look busy but unavailable to anyone who saw her. It was the new ‘emotionally distant’ thing she was trying since the Neverland trip, and it seemed to be working fine. People left her alone, for the most part, but it didn’t make her any happier. That was, until her ears and heart had a Pavlovian response to the sound of Orion’s voice. No, heart, stop doing the flippy thing! We’re mad at him, remember? she thought to herself. Posey calmly and coolly locked her phone and put it in her bag before crossing her arms over her chest and finally raising her gaze to meet Orion, who had been babbling on about haunted houses. “Yeah,” she said with a nod. “I was just going to check it out because…” Because I love Halloween and costumes and spooky stuff! No, she had to be cool. “Because…whatever.” Posey shrugged in an attempt at seeming aloof. “It’s not surprising that you’re not into these kind of things. I think you’ve proven yourself to be a scaredy cat already.” She tossed the words over her shoulder as the attendant ushered her into the haunted house. She spoke the words like she wanted him to leave, but kind of hoped he’d follow. She was also a scaredy cat.
Orion didn't know whether he should laugh or conjure up a dark hole for himself to fall into at the tone of Posey's response. It was so unlike her usual exuberance that he really did want to laugh at the alternate universe-y vibes of it all, but since he knew full well that it was because of his stupidity in listening to her older brother that had him longing for the dark hole. But since laughing would definitely upset her worse and there was no magic in Walt for conjuring, Orion just coughed awkwardly. "I deserved that. But I'm not a coward, okay. At least not all the time, Posey." He insisted, scurrying into the haunted house behind her. Orion had no idea if he was actually afraid of haunted houses or not, since the first and last trip in a Haunted house outside of Walt where Orion had accidentally ruined the experience by turning the first person to try to scare him into a little grey barn owl. But he supposed it be worth finding out if he could talk to Posey more. "Please let me prove that to you?"
"Lovely day for a Haunted House trip, eh?" Orion asked awkwardly, sidling up to Posey at the entrance of the Haunted house. It was probably the worst way he'd ever greeted anyone in his entire life. But after months of not speaking because of the whole "listening to her possibly murderous brother and distancing himself from her right when things in their friendship were starting to move in a very 👀 direction" thing, asking about haunted houses was the best he could do. "I've never really been much of a fan of these kinds of things really, but I guess if there was a day to visit one, this. Would. Be. It."
↳INSTAGRAM @oriononline uploaded a new photo.
Visited my mother for Mother's day, only a few hundred years to go.
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TEXT ✉️ AMBROSIUSES
Kally: Please tell me that nothing you did at the ball was stupider than drunk-texting your ex-boyfriend and telling him that law school is the most boring of all schools!!!
Orion: Uhhh no? I saw my friend stare at her brother type figure have sex for longer than what's appropriate and then developed a possible heart feel for said friend. But I think you still managed to beat me in terms of stupidity. Thank you, Kalasin.
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: According to thefreedictionary.com, the VOMer bone is what separates our left and right nasal cavities. So without that word that starts with vom, we'd all be breathing out of one hole! Boom!
Orion: And you want to associate that with Valentine's day? What are you even Boom-ing, it sounds stupid instead of disgusting now.
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: OKAY but maybe that could be part of the fun! Why are you so against me starting a rad trend???
Orion: What fun thing starts with Vom? I'm not against you starting a rad trend! That's just NOT a rad trend!
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: WHY NOT? It works just fine to me! Would you rather I call it a Ballposal? That sounds like I put my nuts in a ring box and gave them to her.
Orion: What's the first syllable of vompose, bro?
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: No that's what I'm calling it! I'm starting a trend. Like, instead of prompose, it'd be a Valentine's Promposal, thus a V-omposal.
Orion: No.
TEXT | ORAZ
Baz: So I think I'm gonna vompose to Sylvie. And I need your help to make sure I don't fuck it up.
Orion: Congratulations you fucked up already and called it vompose
I'm so glad we didn't do anything we might regret back at the sexy costume party. I'd much rather just hang out with you than suck your dick right now!
I hope 2019 is finally the year you can forgive me.
TEXT 💩 CAYRION
Cayo: Don't you have MEMORIES, man?
Orion:...Not of showing my father my poop! It wasn't particularly memorable for me!