Firstly I’d like to say thank you to everyone who interacted with and enjoyed my stories, I started writing fanfiction 3 years ago to indulge in my hobby of writing, and I honestly didn’t think much of it, I just posted for fun. But then people stumbled across my little stories and enjoyed them so much that I continued writing them.
Unfortunately life happened, and I had to spontaneously abandon my blog and the stories I was writing. Nothing serious, but I think many can relate to the unfortunate circumstances of life that leads one to have to abandon a hobby they love.
I thought about this blog on and off for the past 3 years, part of me wanted to come back to it, part of me accepting that maybe I’d never get the opportunity to be a fanfic writer again. Luckily, life has been somewhat kind to me, and has given me the time I wanted to come back to writing.
Now I have to break the bad news that I will not be coming back to this blog specifically. BTS will always hold a special place in my heart for the joy and comfort they’ve given me, but it is just not a fandom that I have a motivation to write for anymore.
This blog will stay up for those who enjoy the stories I wrote, and as a reminder to me of the joy fanfic writing brought me. But after this post, there will be no more posts on this blog. Which feels like nothing much is changing since it’s been stagnant for 3 years anyway lmao.
I am moving to a new blog that will house the fics I will be writing in the future, as well as cross posting on AO3 under the same username. It might take a while to set up, but if you’d like, you can pop in every now and again to the new blog and see what my mind has come up with.
I’m sorry to disappoint those who followed this blog and enjoyed my BTS writing, but I hope you can understand why I am moving on from this blog.
Again, thank you to everyone who supported me and my stories, I hope to see some of you on the new blog!
hihi !! i just wanna say i truly love all your works 🥺🥺🥺 your way of using words is beautiful and i've fallen in love with the way you write and your stories that give me comfort !! i really really loved "my hope", "zephyr" and "nepenthe" <333 thank you so much for writing !! i hope you have a nice day/night :D
Hi!!! Sorry I didn't get to you sooner! I haven't been able to get on Tumblr in a hot second lol but thank you so much!! It makes me happy to hear that my stories are able to give you comfort, overjoyed even! Also, I've seen all your reblogs and thank you, thank you, thank you! I can't express my gratitude enough! I hope you have an amazing day/night aswell :) 💜
Hii I've been a follower of your blog for quite some time now and just want to say your fics are one of my ultimate comfort reads, I have read almost all of your fics now and just wow. Thank you for your hard work and for writing such amazing stories 💜
hii! Thank you so so so much for your kind words! They mean a lot to me, truly! It's hard to find the motivation to write sometimes but your message made today 10 times better. I'm glad what I write brings you comfort. Thank you for reading my stories! 💜💜
Ps, I know I don't disclose this on my blog much, but you can always send requests for me to write if you need a little pick-me-up! Fluff or angst :)! 💜
✿ Fluff, fluff, and a lot of fluff. A lot of good family fluffy times. Less romance between reader and Hobi and more of a dive into family dynamics. There’s like, one suggestive joke..
“You’re a big boy now, you can shampoo your own fur.”
“But Eomma! I like it when you do it.”
There you stood, at a standoff with your 8-year-old son in the bathroom. Yunho stubbornly stood in front of the tub, hands on his hips like he was the mom and a pout on his face. It was after dinner. Everyone was doing their nightly routine and getting ready for bed. Bath and shower time.
Yunho has been feeling a bit clingy lately, which is fine. He’s still as much of a momma’s boy as he was 2 years ago, even if he seems to be constantly on Hobi’s tail (No pun intended) He’s going though one of those moods, like everyone does. You usually humour him. With extra hugs and cuddles and all that, but you have to draw the line somewhere,
No matter how much your heart aches at the thought of Yunho growing up and doing adult things, like going off to college, independence is important. It’s hard gauging when’s the right time to start letting baby birds learn to fly on their own, but it’s not like this is the first time nudging him out of the nest. Yunho started dressing himself and doing his night time routine when he was 7. He recently started doing chores. Started walking to the bus stop on his own at too (With supervision, of course, it was only down the street)
This wasn’t his first bath alone. He’s had plenty of showers and baths all by himself. He even glowed the praise you and Hobi gave him whenever he did a good job and didn’t make a mess. Now that all of a sudden he didn’t want that and instead wanted you to bathe him, it was... not so much odd as it was unusual.
“I thought you liked taking baths by yourself?” You asked, raising a brow. Yunho slightly curled in on himself at your question. “Yeah, but... I just want you to...” He mumbled, looking down at his fidgeting feet. Ohhh, okay. You sighed knowingly, kneeling down so you were more on Yunho’s level. “You can talk to me, Bub. Remember your bottle? You don’t want it to explode, right?”
When you first became a mom, you vowed to do a better job than your own. You firmly believed that teaching kids things like proper communication, good coping mechanisms for feelings, and that you and Hoseok were always going to be there for him was vital for the role of a good parent. You had explained it in a way he could understand. Kids have feelings too, and the classic “bottle” metaphor was perfect for explaining that.
Yunho took a deep breath and took your hand in his two smaller ones, twiddling with your fingers. “You’ve been... On the computer a lot and I miss you.” He admitted. You gave him a sweet smile. There it is. You had a big deadline coming up for an important article, meaning you were spending extra time making sure that it was perfect. More time away from Yunho. It’s hard having two working parents, you get that, so maybe you could do something to sooth some of Yunho’s discontent.
“I have an idea.” You said, standing up and reaching out for Yunho’s hand. He gladly latched on and followed you to your room, his tail wagging behind him.
You told Yunho to sit and wait on your bed while you entered the bathroom where Hoseok was, clad in just a pair of plaid boxers, brushing his teeth. He smiled when you entered, reaching down and rinsing out his mouth. “Hey,” He said, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you into his side. You welcomed the embrace. “Hey, you haven’t taken your shower, right?” You asked.
“Not yet. Why? Want to join?” He smirked, leaning down to give you pecks on your lips and cheeks, squeezing your hips. The slight taste of mint on his mouth was slightly comical. You chuckled, unable to stop the smile making its way on your face. However, this wasn’t what you came here for. You gently put your hands on Hoseok’s chest and nudge him away. “No, keep it PG. Yunho’s in the other room.” You said. Hoseok immediately turned red, awkwardly clearing his throat.
His hands moved from your lower back to your waist.
“Then... what’s up? Is he sleeping in our bed again tonight?” He asked, his tail slightly swishing side to side. He always loves it when we’re all together. “Nope. I mean he can but, I have an idea and I need your help.” You said.
“Oh?” Hoseok raised a brow.
“Listen carefully,”
The sound of splashing water and giggles filled the white-tiled bathroom.
It was a cute sight to behold. Playing around in the bathtub were Yunho and Hoseok, dressed in their bathing suits. Lavender scented bubbles strewn about. On the floor, on the wall, in your hair. There were barely any left in the tub. Collateral damage for Yunho’s enjoyment. The boys were playing with some of Yunho’s toy boats while you sat on a stool outside the tub washing his hair. A smile permanently glued to your face.
“Hobi!”
Yunho giggled, attempting to splash back at Hoseok as the older had done to him. Though his attempts were in vain due to the small size of his efforts. “Careful bub, you don’t want me to get shampoo in your ears.” You warned, gently coercing him back so you could properly reach him. Yunho complied, sticking his tongue out at Hoseok, who had a sly grin on his face.
“Alright, rinse,” you said, and Yunho dunked his head back in the water, using his hands to rinse out the shampoo in his fur. “Good job!” You praised, giving him a kiss on his forehead once he finished. Yunho grinned, soaking up the attention like a dehydrated sponge, preening in it. “You’re fur is getting so long, Yunho. I almost can’t tell what’s your fur and what’s your hair.” Hoseok observed. Yunho chuckled, leaning into Hoseok’s touch as the older played with his hair.
“It looks handsome on you,” Hoseok said.
“I know!” Yunho replied.
What a tiny treasure. Covered in lavender bubbles.
✿ Angst. Just angst. There’s some really cute fluff but I won’t lie, this starts off nice and fluffy and it just goes downhill from there. If you're looking for some angsty, tragic heartache this is the drabble for you. Major character death, descriptions of terminal illness, death, and dying. Talk about losing parents and hints of parental neglect. Lots of tears. Bittersweet.
I’ll write strictly fluff in my next drabble, promise!
✿ I just kept writing this and realized that it was pretty long, but I aim for my oneshots from “Sit and Heal” forward to be at least 10k words or more. So... It’s a drabble now.
✿ Unlike 98% of my stories, this one is written in the third person instead of second person. Y/n is uses she/her pronouns.
Not much happened in Namjoon's life.
He was young, only just starting to lose his baby teeth. The days spent in his small village on the outskirts of the big city bled together like the orange hues of a sunset. But that didn’t mean Namjoon didn’t try to make each day memorable. He’d make it his mission to make each day worth it, whether that be by helping the old woman down the street with her laundry or traveling down to the river to collect smooth stones.
Today, he was exploring the nearby woods. He wandered through the thicket and underbrush until he came upon a clearing with one singular birch tree growing in the middle of it on the top of a small hill. Odd. All the other trees were great oaks or some other brown tree, but this white one stuck out like a sore thumb. The black spots that curled up the bark looked like eyes, and they were looking right at Namjoon, inviting him closer. Beckoning, begging, Namjoon to move his feet.
He obliged and walked closer, climbing the hill and sitting down at the trunk's base. The perfectly green leaves shaded him from the harsh afternoon sun that had been beating down on him for the better part of the day. The tops of his barefoot feet, the apples of his cheeks, and the tip of his nose were already sunburnt. The grass here was softer than the grass in the thick woods. It felt like sheep's wool. Namjoon ran his fingers through the blades, smiling at the feeling.
“Hi!” An excited voice rang beside him, louder than the chirping birds, but not disturbing the natural hum of the forest, more... harmonizing with it. Namjoon looked up and to his left, seeing girl about his age smiling down at him. She wore a simple white dress that reminded him of the clothes he’d see girls in his village wear all the time. Her face was slightly sunburnt as well, and she wore nothing on her feet. Her hair was haphazardly done, like someone had started doing her hair, but lost energy halfway through.
“What’s your name?” She spoke again, her tone just as cheerful as before. Namjoon realized that he had been staring at her, saying nothing. She didn’t seem to care though, she was looking Namjoon up and down too. “Namjoon...” He murmured, feeling shy. “I like that name. My name is Y/n” She chirped. When she smiled, Namjoon noticed that she had some teeth missing, further supporting the fact that they were close in age.
The girl plopped down next to Namjoon, leaning against the tree. “What are you doing here?” She asked. Namjoon looked down at the grass. “I don’t know, I was just walking, and I ended up here.” He shrugged, picking at the longer blades of grass. “Well, this is mine and my mom’s special spot... So if you found it, it must mean you're special!” The girl exclaimed, catching Namjoon by surprise.
“Me? Special?” Namjoon parroted incredulously, but Y/n double downed. “Yeah! You must be! Mommy says everyone is special in their own way, but you seem extra special. Maybe the tree likes you and wants you here.” Y/n had determined. Namjoon didn’t understand the girl’s logic in the slightest. The tree wanted him here? It was a tree, there was nothing special about it, just that it grew in a specific place, out of the way of the other, bigger trees. And he was special for stumbling upon a field of grass? Where on Earth did she get that assumption?
Namjoon decided not to question her logic. Rather, he changed the subject.
“Well. where’s your mom?” He asked, and the girl visibly deflated. “Oh... She’s not feeling well. She can’t come with me as much as she used to.” She mumbled. Namjoon felt bad. He didn’t know the girl all that well, but he already knew that he didn’t like to see her upset. He preferred the cheery, happy tone she had introduced herself with.
“Oh... I’m sorry... Do you like plants?”
“Plants?”
The sun shone through the leaves of the birch tree Namjoon was sitting under. It was a warm day, not too cold, not too hot. It was the perfect temperature to be outside, but Namjoon would be out here regardless of the weather. Snow or rain, Namjoon would rather eat dirt than miss out on a chance to be here with her.
“Joonie?”
Namjoon looked up from his book at the 10-year-old girl who called his name. “Hmm?” He hummed, waiting for Y/n to continue. “What are you reading?” She asked, leaning over him to get a look at the inside pages. “It’s a book about a forest adventurer.” Namjoon explained, slightly tilting the book towards her so she could get a better look. “That sounds cool... What does the adventurer do?” She inquired.
“They do a lot. They fight monsters, save people, make friends,” Namjoon listed on and on telling her about the book as Y/n did her best to read what was on the page. She wasn’t the best at reading. She didn’t do it a lot because she has nobody to teach her. Only learning to read a bit through sheer willpower and baby-like babbling. “There he ma-maade... an... en-engRA-”
Namjoon stopped his own rambling to listen to Y/n. He didn’t know what she was doing at first, but soon he realized she was trying to read the first sentence on the page. She was struggling, Namjoon noted. Did she not know how to read? “There he made an engraving,” Namjoon read to her without a single stutter or stop. Y/n frowned.
“Why is reading so hard?” She asked, a pout on her face as she turned to look at Namjoon. “I don’t know... it just is. I can help you if you’d like,” He offered, and he saw Y/n’s face light up before she wrapped him in a binding hug. “Thank you Joonie!” she cheered, practically splayed across him. Namjoon set the book down and wrapped his arms around her too. “No problem.”
Once Y/n pulled away, Namjoon told her to sit next to him before he placed the book in between the two of them. He pointed at the first word on the page. “Try to read the first sentence,” He said. “Sentence?” Y/n asked. “Mhmm, Read until to get to this little dot. What you read is a sentence.” Namjoon did his best to explain the concept of a sentence to her, using the words his mother had used when explaining it to him.
Y/n nodded and started sounding out each syllable.
“There he... made an ennngraaving... That mar-marked his sss-pot,”
Namjoon could tell that this was going to be a challenge as he helped her read by pronouncing the words she couldn’t quite get, allowing her to mimic the sound, but it was one he’d gladly take on.
Just for her.
“Joonie, what’s an engrav- that word.” She asked, giving up on saying the 3 syllable word and opting to point at it in the book instead. “An engraving?” He asked with perfect pronunciation. Again. Y/n nodded. “It’s like... a drawing, but you carve it into something.” He explained. “Like what?” She pressed. “Like a tree,” Namjoon said.
Y/n’s eyes lit up. Namjoon subconsciously compared them to the stars in the sky. If he looked close enough, maybe he could spot constellations swimming in her irises “We should do that! So we always know where our spot is, like the adventurer!” She exclaimed. Namjoon chuckled. “This is the only white tree around. I doubt anyone could overlook it,” He said, but Y/n was determined. “Still! Can we do it?” She bounced up and down. “We have nothing to carve with,” Namjoon pointed out.
Y/n deflated for a second before her look of determination came back.
“One day! One day I’ll bring something so we can draw on the tree! I promise!”
“Whatever you say”
Another chilly fall day, Namjoon found himself walking through the forest. He was wearing shoes this time. They were a gift from his father for his 14th birthday, and the only thing he could think of as he walked through the thicket is that he was excited to show them to Y/n.
“There you are! I was worried this would be a no-show day!” A peppy voice called to Namjoon as he stepped into the clearing. Namjoon jogged his way over to Y/n, through the grass, up the hill, and then sitting down right next to her. “Nope, not today.” Namjoon smiled. “Look, I got shoes,” He said, sticking his feet towards the girl so she could get a good look. “They look nice! They’re very Namjoon,” She giggled.
Namjoon quirked a brow. “What is that supposed to mean?” He chuckled. “They look very proper, like the shoes the librarian wears. Very smart.” She explained, giving Namjoon a sweet smile that reminded him of the beautiful honeysuckles that grew outside his house. Namjoon had watched Y/n grow as she had watched him. Her features had matured softly, her hair grew longer, but her smile was still as heart stopping as the first time Namjoon had met her.
“How are things?” Namjoon asked, ready to listen intently to anything Y/n’d say. He doesn’t know when he started hanging on her every word. Maybe it was when she admitted she didn’t know how to do her hair, explaining why it was always unruly, which is why Namjoon had learned how to braid from his mom. Maybe it was when she started to share his love for plants, which is why Namjoon always brought her flowers in the spring.
Maybe it was when she admitted that her allusive mother was terribly ill, which explained a lot. Not knowing how to do her hair, always seeming slightly perturbed, always eager to forget about the lingering dread and sorrow that stained the walls of her house.
“Same as always. Mother is ill, father is tired, and I’m... Y/n,” Y/n chuckled solemnly. “Enough about me. How are you?” She was avoiding the topic of her and her life right now, which Namjoon had grown to learn meant that things were getting worse. Whether that be her father’s temper or her mother’s illness.
He’d be an escape for her. He’d let her have this.
As Namjoon talked on and on about his day, his birthday, his pet dog, anything and everything, Y/n listened and paid attention through it all, occasionally jumping in with a comment of her own. Just like every day for the past eight years. Meet in the afternoon and talk far into the night.
Namjoon wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Oh, um, by the way, I brought something for us.” Y/n said, stuffing her hand into her pocket and drawing out a small knife sheathed in a simple leather sheath. Namjoon quirked his brow. “What are you going to do with that?” He asked. Y/n rolled her eyes. “Don’t tell me you forgot about my promise!” She sighed. Namjoon just stayed quiet. “Our engraving? The one I vowed that we’d do one day? Ring any bells?” She asked.
Namjoon’s eyes widened in realization as he let out a long ‘oh’ and snapped his fingers together. “I remember now! I thought you were just saying things, honestly.” He shrugged. Y/n only chuckled and grabbed Namjoon’s hand, pulling him closer to where she was kneeling at the base of the birch tree trunk. Namjoon watched as she carefully unsheathed the small knife. It had a dark oak handle and a short silver blade. It was more like a sharp letter opener.
“Here.” Y/n said as she turned the knife around and handed Namjoon the handle of the knife. “You write first.” She said. Namjoon took the knife and stared at the off-white color of the tree and the black stripes. “What do I write?” He asked. “Anything you want.” Y/n said. Anything he wants. What would Namjoon want to see carved into the tree that he’d grown to fond of and deemed special after all these years? An idea popped into his mind, and he ran with it before he could talk himself down.
Namjoon + Y/n
Cheesy.
But the wide smile that spread across Y/n’s face once he was finished made it worth it.
“You’re a sap,” She giggled, before she gently took the knife from Namjoon’s hand and drew a heart around the two names. She turned to look at Namjoon with a soft smile, and suddenly, the rays of the setting sun laid across her face perfectly. Each and every detail in her face was basking in a soft, golden glow. Namjoon knew she was beautiful, but it was in this moment, with her smiling at him like that, that he knew his heart was officially taken.
It was raining that day.
Namjoon couldn’t care less as he sat under the birch tree, waiting for Y/n. The leaves of the tree did a better job of shielding him from the rain than he would’ve thought. The two made a promise to always come to the birch tree no matter what, which sounds extreme, but with Namjoon’s boring life and Y/n’s need to escape reality, it was an easy promise to keep.
“Through sun or rain, sleek or snow, I’ll be here. Every day. Just for you.”
Her words rang in Namjoon's head as the rain pattered against leaves and ground. Like little children playing drums, rhythmically unrhythmic. The seconds that passed turned to minutes, and the minutes turned to hours. Namjoon was starting to think she wasn’t coming. This worried him. Y/n always came, even that one time she had a huge gash in her leg from an accident at home. Haphazardly stitched up. He had to pull her away from the tree and to the doctor in the village that day, despite her whines of “Joonie, I’m okay!”
Unsurprisingly, she wasn’t. The wound was already infected.
So if she weren’t here, did something bad happen to her?
Namjoon’s mind ran wild with all the possible things that could ever go wrong for a person. What if she got eaten by a bear? What if she broke her leg? What if something happened at home? On and on his mind went with the most outrageous, but not entirely impossible, ideas. His anxiety was through the roof as he sat and ran his fingers over the engraving in the tree. Over the symbols that spelt his name and Y/n’s.
Two years. That’s how long it’s been since Y/n had encouraged Namjoon to mark the tree. Throughout these years, the engraving still looked fresh. The wood didn’t rot around it, bugs didn’t touch it, it wasn’t grown over. It looked exactly like it did the day it was born.
The day Namjoon realized he had fallen in love with Y/n.
Wet footsteps shook Namjoon out of his thoughts as he looked up, seeing Y/n’s soaked form not too far from him. Her arms were wrapped around her figure and she was only wearing a nightgown, head hung low. What was she doing coming out here dressed like that? Namjoon’s brows furrowed. “Y/n!” Namjoon called out to her, sitting up straight.
Y/n looked up and locked eyes with Namjoon, and he could tell in the moment that something was deathly wrong. Her smile was nowhere to be seen, completely wiped from her face like it was a footprint on the beach. Eyes red and face wet from something other than raindrops. Her body bounced as sobs wracked her body. Namjoon stood up, ready to walk over to her, but she beat him to it. Running over to him and burying her tear-stained face in the wet fabric of his shirt.
Namjoon wrapped his arms around her. Tightly. Protectively. He gently coerced her to sit down with him at the base of the tree, where the leaves above protected them against the rain the most. “Y/n? Y/n what’s wrong?” He asked as she continued to sob, desperately gripping at his shirt and wrapping herself around him like he was a lifeline.
Her choked sobs hurt Namjoon’s heart. He pulled away slightly, ignoring Y/n’s whimpers of protest before he cupped her face, getting her to look at him. She was a mess. Wet, teary, and tired by the looks of it. “Y/n, look at me. Breathe, you have to breathe. Breathe with me,” He said as he led her through deep breaths, calming her down enough to the point where she could get words past her wobbling lips.
“Tell me what’s wrong, flower.” The pet name wasn’t intentional. Namjoon was about to backtrack, but it didn’t seem like Y/n minded. That, or she just couldn’t process it yet. She opened and closed her mouth a couple of times, trying to get her mind to process and speak the words she wanted to say. Namjoon gave her time. He knew how it felt to try and talk when your mind seems to be out of commission.
“She’s... She’s g-gone...” she whispered.
Namjoon’s eyes widened. The world seemed to freeze. No more pattering raindrops, no more biting cold, no more petrichor scent filling his nose. Nothing, just himself and Y/n. “Who..?” Namjoon asked, but he already knew the answer you were going to give him. “Mother... She’s- She’s really gone.” Y/n sobbed, and Namjoon pulled her closer, feeling tears of his own slightly peek up in the corners of his eyes.
He’s never met Y/n’s mother, but every time she talked about her, it seemed like her mother was an angel put on Earth and snatched away from her family all too soon. Y/n’s mother got sick when Y/n was around 6 or 7. At first it was just a cough, then coughing fits, then unstable breathing. Her body just seemed to slowly give up on itself.
For someone who was so young when her mother became bedridden, Y/n sure does remember a lot from when her mother was in her prime. Memories of picking flowers in this very field to baking cookies for her father when he came back from work. Y/n remembers the littlest of things from that time. Like when she was younger, she wrapped each memory in cloth and held a vice grip on them.
“They’re the only good memories I have of her. They get me through hard days.”
“Joonie, she’s gone.” Y/n sobbed, as if convincing Namjoon of that fact would help her accept it. All Namjoon could do was continue to hold her and press chaste, soothing kisses to the top of her forehead, whispering the occasional “It’s okay,” and “I know” as she choked on her cries.
How much time had passed? Minutes? Hours? It felt like an eternity. Namjoon could still hear her wails, could still feel her body shaking, could still see her tears. Even as she laid still, limp in his arms, inevitable exhaustion taking over her body. “It’s going to be okay, I’m here for you,” Namjoon whispered into the crown of her head.
Y/n lifted her puffy, red face to gaze up at Namjoon, raking over his features as if she were trying to catch any deception in his face. She sighed when she didn’t find anything. “Do you promise me, Namjoon?” She whispered, desperation overtaking her features. “You won’t go?” Namjoon shook his head, giving Y/n a loving, reassuring smile. Unspoken confessions shared between the two of them.
“I’d never.”
Y/n returned his smile. Hers having a bit more love behind it.
Then she coughed.
At first, neither Namjoon nor Y/n wanted to jump to conclusions. It was just a tiny cough, nothing to panic over. It was just the cold, right? The stuffy rain and intense emotions. There’s no way Y/n could be sick. She never got sick.
But she did.
She got terribly sick.
Over the course of the years, into Namjoon’s late teens and early adulthood, Y/n had gotten sicker and sicker. At first, Y/n insisted that Namjoon stayed away from her, forget his promise and go, but Namjoon never listened. He kept coming back to the birch tree where he knew she would be. Sitting under the heart with their names written in it. Even when she pushed him away, he wouldn’t budge. He would hug her as tears blurred her vision. As she cried out day and night, “Go! Get away! I can’t get you sick! Please...” He was too worried about her. He cared about her too much to let her go through this without support.
Namjoon became angry, sad, everything in between. He felt a part of himself dying with each cough Y/n would let out. Each tear that slipped from her pretty eyes felt like a cruel dagger. Each whine a burn. He cursed the gods for torturing him like this. For cursing Y/n like this.
But, realistically, what could he do?
He scoured books, consulted doctors, prayed even, which he never does. All to no avail.
Y/n was 22 and today was the end of her thread.
“Do you know tulips represent?” Namjoon asked, looking down at Y/n who was laid in his lap, delicately holding a pair of pink tulips. “Hmm, I don’t know... Do you know, Joonie?” She smiled, looking up to meet his eyes. She’d gotten thinner, a bit paler, weaker. Gods, she was so frail... As the years went by, Y/n was less capable of making it to the tree on her own. Namjoon would find her sitting a few feet away, waiting for him to carry her the rest of the way. Who knows how she made it as far as she did.
Some days she could barely sit up.
Today she could barely lift her arm.
Namjoon leant down to give Y/n a kiss on the forehead, pulling a strained giggle out of her. “I think you know,” Namjoon teased, and Y/n just rolled her eyes. “You’re still a sap, after all these years,” she laughed, pausing abruptly as a coughing fit wracked her body. Namjoon rubbed her back soothingly, sitting her up slightly. She gave Namjoon a bittersweet smile, rubbing her aching chest as they both silently let the moment pass without another word. Namjoon just held her a closer.
This was the worst she’d ever been.
It’s not like the fits are new. Namjoon has held her through more coughing fits than he’s willing to accept, but what used to be soft coughs have turned into hard ones that sound awfully painful, and they probably were. But Y/n would never tell that to him. Ever since they realized that she was in fact sick, Y/n had treated it like a burden she has to deal with herself. It took a long time for Namjoon to even convince her that she shouldn’t hold her coughing in around him.
That was so long ago, but it feels like yesterday.
Namjoon wondered if this is how Y/n felt with her mother. Hopeless. Delusional. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t grasp the fact that she was dying. And today was the day, wasn’t it? He could see it.
Was he trying all that hard in the first place? Or is he drowning himself in faux, blissful ignorance? Pretending that everything is okay when both he and Y/n know it’s not.
He’s not ready.
There are so many things Namjoon wants to do with Y/n. He wants to take her around the world, show her the beach and the mountains. Drag her to libraries and gardens. Find a home, settle down, start a family. Seal their unspoken love with a pretty gold ring. Kiss her, properly. Love her like he was living in a romance novel.
Why couldn’t this be a fairytale?
“I’m surprised our engraving is still standing,” Y/n said after a stretch of silence, looking fondly at the image ingrained in bark next to Namjoon’s head and pulling him out of his stupor. “Maybe it’s a sign that we’re never meant to be apart.” Namjoon teased, although they both knew what he was implying. “Not yet.” Y/n gave him a sad smile. “You’ll always have me in your heart, we’ll never be truly apart,” Y/n whispered to him, reaching up and gently cupping his face with her hand.
She was talking like she was already gone.
Namjoon felt his heart sink. “Don’t say it,” He begged, his eyes turning glossy. “It won’t be any less true if I don’t,” Y/n sighed. “Please,” Namjoon pleaded, putting his hand on top of hers. “I’m not ready yet,” Y/n wiped a stray tear that fell from his watering eyes, doing her best to lift herself up so she could rest her head on Namjoon’s chest. Though, Namjoon did most of the work. “Could you ever be? I’m not ready either, Joonie, yet time still passes.” Namjoon leant into her touch, taking a few deep breaths before he nodded, already knowing what she was going to say.
It was about time to face the truth, anyway.
“My time is almost up... Hold me while I go, and lay me under our engraving.”
Another coughing fit.
Namjoon held her even closer, choking on sobs as tears fell from his face. He rubbed her back gently, helping her through it and switching to petting her hair once the fit passed. He swore he could feel it. Namjoon swore he could feel the life draining from her body. “Joonie, look at me,” Y/n whispered, letting out a cough or two. Namjoon did as she asked, even though it hurt to see her smiling through the pain.
Such a pretty, pretty smile.
Y/n leant up, cupping Namjoon’s face, and gave him the sweetest, softest kiss. A real kiss. Her lips felt like warm summer nights, but also cold winter days. Like the tarts Namjoon’s mother used to make on his birthday. Bittersweet. Y/n pulled away, but Namjoon chased her lips for more, and Y/n indulged him. Namjoon could taste the salt of their mixed tears in the kiss. Could feel Y/n’s body slowly lose its strength. A deep sense of acceptance, solace, sadness, and yearning rested in Namjoon’s heart, pulling it every which way.
“I love you, Joonie.” Y/n whispered against his lips, pulling away to rest her head on his chest, as she couldn’t hold it up for any longer.
Hello, your story sit and heal it’s so good, so sweet to read, i loved every world of it and how that world was created. Wolf Guk, the Witch and Yume were so cool and they a great dynamic between them, a cute little family, and Jungkook’s pack was so cute too. Thank for sharing this, it was my first with witch au and it was incredible.
Hi! I'm glad that I was able to make your first with a witch au was a good one. I love witch au's, so being told that I made a good one makes me giddy. Thank you for the kind words and thank you for reading Sit and Heal. It puts a huge smile on my face to know that you enjoyed it so much! :) 💜💜
Whenever I look back at my “old” work i have one of two reactions, it’s either
Wow, I wrote that? Am I sure this is my work? It is? I never knew I could write something so pretty… This is my story? I’m not like, looking at the wrong story right?
Or
This looks like a 5th grader wrote it lol, my previous English and creative writing teachers would be so disappointed lmaoooo if only they can see me now lolll
Not a request or question, just wanted to say you have yet again. made the sweetest and most heartwarming love story!! I found myself tearing up through some of the details in the union at the end of Sit and Heal 😭😭😭 Please rsvp me in your next love story for this lonely romantic🥺❤️You are such a talent! -A
Oh my gosh, thank you! 💜 I didn’t expect Sit and Heal to get the reaction that it did so I’m overjoyed that you loved it so much! Makes me want to jump right in and start on my next fanfic idea that I’ll definitely rsvp you for 😉 I whole heartedly believe that the only reason my work does well is because of the people who read it, so again, thank you so much!
P.s: my ask box doesn’t just have to be for questions or requests, you can send me anything, really ☺️
Hello! Just wanted to say that I love Sit and Heal so so much!!! 😍😍 you did a wonderful job with the fic and I enjoyed reading it so much 💜💜 it made me happy and it made me sad and it made me scared and it was just... a wonderful experience, thank you do much for writing it!! 🥰💜
Thank you so much! 💜 I’m glad you enjoyed it so much, it makes me happy to see that people enjoy my writing especially because I had so much fun writing it! It’s a pleasure to write for such wonderful readers 💜
Genre: Werewolf!Au, Witch!Au, Fluff, Angst, Strangers to Lovers
Warnings: Panic attacks, overall anxiety from y/n, trust issues, minor betrayal, Moderate body horror (Descriptions of burn scars, cracking bone, etc. There is one part that can be classified as semi-extreme but it’s like one sentence and it's about a burn) mentions of hunting, discrimination (?) mentions of a witch hunt basically, minor character death (Don’t worry you’ll celebrate this one. Sorry to all my Jackson fans) morbid self speech/thoughts, descriptions of blood, i’m probably missing something but there’s nothing overly graphic.
Word Count: 24k (T-This was supposed to be 10k...)
Note! Note! Note! If you’ve read the teaser, a part of this story is going to be familiar. However!!! There are some details that were added that are important to the story, so please don’t skip parts! I really hope this is good and not a disaster because I’m literally 2 weeks late oh my god-
Summary: “You have scars, Y/n, both on your heart and on your skin. The one on your arm may be healed, but the one on your heart isn’t. Please. Let me lick your wounds,” Or: The wolf that visits you every afternoon is your shoulder to lean on as you realize it's time to learn to love and trust again, even if it’s hard.
The sun peeked its rays through the canopy of trees that covered the sky of the lush forest you lived in. Green leaves blowing in the light morning wind while the local songbirds started to wake up and serenade the rest of the fauna. Their repetitive song now an alarm clock rousing you from sleep in the morning’s early hours. The sun wrapped the forest in a blanket of warmth, like the embrace of a new mother. The perfect day for sitting outside and reading a book.
The small cottage you call home is built somewhere deep in the woods. Old, but stable. The wood creaks and the vines that hug the old planks are there to stay. It’s quite a trip from the nearest town or village. You didn’t mind that though. In fact, you loved being so secluded, nothing but you, your cat, and the forest.
You loved calling the birds, laying out food for the squirrels, soaking in the sun, everything. It was comforting to be accepted by something so much larger than yourself, something divine. Living in a world of harmony and becoming a part of the cycle of life felt wonderful. It was healing to you, since others like yourself shunned your entire existence, turned up their nose at you.
People think witches are short, grey-haired, old women covered in warts. While yes, anyone can be a witch, not all witches were the scaremongering, children eating, demons, fairytales made them out to be. Yes, there are “bad” witches. Witches who don’t have the best moral compass or abuse the craft. But there are plenty of witches, like yourself, who have admirable morals and strive to be good people.
Perfectly normal, pleasant people.
But winners write history, and witches were the losers. You used to live in a small village just on the outskirts of the forest. You used to have friends and go to school. You used to wave to people on the streets and spend your time at the local, family-owned cafe. You used to. Until they found out what you did behind closed doors.
It was an accident, really. One of your friends wanted to surprise you for your birthday and burst into your house without asking, right when you were in the middle of making an elixir for a stray cat. It was medicine, the poor thing was losing fur.
You call it medicine. But they call it witchcraft.
Granted, some unexplainable things were happening there. “Normal” medicines don’t poof clouds of purple smoke and sparkle despite the lack of light, but there was nothing malicious. Your friend didn’t care. Their pale face and wide eyes forever haunted your nightmares. Their screams of “Witch!” echoed in your ears in the late hours of the night. Memories flashed before your eyes of you frantically packing your things, grabbing your cat, and running into the woods. The scorch of fire that chased after you, burning through your white hanbok and leaving a pink, wrinkled burn scar on your upper arm.
Navigating the woods was like clockwork for you. It was normal for you to wander in here and forage for fresh flowers and herbs. It would calm your spirit and lift your mood. But running blindly into the trees with blurry vision, a long skirt that you kept tripping on, and a heavy heart left you more or less lost.
You don’t know how long you were running, but eventually, you stumbled across the cottage that you now call home. It was obviously old and needed some TLC, but you made it work. You remember bursting through the door, letting your cat out of your bag, and collapsing, sobbing with your back against the door.
You remember the tears that trailed down your face. You remember the hurt, the betrayal, the confusion. You remember your cat trying to comfort you, but he was equally just as confused. The burn. The scorching, torrid burn. It felt as if your skin was melting off, ready to peel and slap against the dirty wooden floor. The cold air against the pinking scar felt like absolute torture.
But you also remember pulling yourself back together, slapping some tape on the cracks of your heart. You cleaned up the cottage the best you could, dusting here, sweeping there. You remember plopping yourself on the dusty hay bed that was laid in what seemed to be the bedroom, and you remember the red-fiery anger that bubbled up in your chest.
But that was 6 years ago. You were no longer a lost 16-year-old with a vengeance towards the ones who scarred you. You were mature, and you would not become the person they thought you were.
The thought of the past sent a wave of pain through your upper arm.
You hissed but ultimately ignored it.
“Yume! Don’t chase the birds!” You reprimanded the black cat, who replied with a sassy meow. Ironic that a witch had a black cat, but you loved Yume, even if he annoyed you sometimes. The furry ball of black lazily blinked, trudging back to where you were sitting on the grass, a yellow quilted blanket under you as you continued to read. Meow... Yume whined, butting his head against your arm.
Meow...
You looked down at him, quirking a brow. “What’s up, bud?” Meow. He replied, firmly butting his head against your arm again. “You’re hungry?” You smiled, scratching under his chin. Meow! He screeched with squinted eyes, and you knew that you should probably do what he asks before he gets cranky.
You sighed, getting up and dusting off your yellow skirt before going back into your cottage to get Yume a snack. You clanged around your icebox before you pulled out some leftover rabbit from last night. I should check the snares. You thought as you went back to your diva of a cat.
Yume was patiently waiting for you on the blanket, tail slowly swishing from side to side. You sat down next to him, picking pieces of the rabbit and feeding it to him while he laid in your lap. Meow “You’re welcome, bub,”
This was what the perfect life was to you. You, your cat, and nature. Sure, maybe it got a little lonely without human interaction, but after the last time you had human friends, maybe it was for the best.
“Again?” You sighed, raising a confused brow at the snare which had caught a rabbit, but the only evidence left behind now was some fur and a foot. This has been happening all month. It wasn’t detrimental, but winter was coming up and your storage was running low.
You reset the snare, throwing the foot into the woods for the local pack of wolves that stalked the deeper areas of the forest. It wasn’t much, but maybe they could sharpen their canines on the bone. You were pretty sure it was a wolf doing this, but they never came near where you lived. Oddly, they just seemed to stare at you when you caught them stalking the thick tree line, looking at you with curious eyes. So why were they coming near your snares? Were they having trouble finding food?
You decided that you would worry about it once you got home. You picked up your basket and made your way deeper into the forest, lifting your skirt a bit so it didn’t get caught in the brush. You still had one more snare to check. You trekked through the thicket, stepping over thorn-filled bushes and avoiding blooming flowers, not wanting to disturb them.
You were maybe... a few yards away from the snare when you heard a pained whine. Startled, you stopped and looked around for anything that could’ve made the noise, but you saw nothing. Just green. The whine sounded again, and this time you had a better idea of where it was coming from, near your snare.
Cautiously, you kept approaching the snare, and you gasped at the sight that greeted you. There, in the trap, was a rather sizable wolf with beautiful golden chestnut fur that tapered into a light brown. One of its muscular legs was stuck in the snare, and it was kicking violently at the rope. The wolf was obviously too big to reach back and free itself, yet it tried, writhing and squirming, trying anything to get free.
“Oh no...” you whimpered out.
Suddenly, the wolf whipped its head around to look at you, boring its sharp yellow eyes into yours. It bared its teeth, letting out a snarling growl that shook the Earth, locking you in place.
“I-It’s okay! I’m not going to hurt you,” you stuttered out. The wolf did nothing except growl some more, lips back in an intimidating snarl that would make anyone run. But instead of running, you took a small step forward, kneeling down on the grass a safe distance away from it. Once you were able to calm down your pounding heart, you took the time to admire the details of the wolf’s fur. The subtle grey and white patches on its face and neck, its piercing golden eyes, its sharp teeth.
The wolf was no longer squirming. Its actions halted by your sudden appearance, but it continued to growl and snarl, trying to intimidate you. It was working, no doubt. It was a giant wolf. Looking at it, you could tell that if it was sitting, it would reach your waist in height. But despite the fear that clawed at your chest, begging you to run, you stayed, wanting to help it.
“I-I know you’re scared... I’d be scared too,” you called to the wolf. You knew your words would go unheard, but hopefully, your tone could calm it down, show that you weren’t aggressive. It worked for a lot of the creatures you’ve encountered. (Although they were mostly little creatures)
The beast tilted its head to the side slightly, no longer snarling. Instead, it seemed confused, eyes wide like a puppy. “I’m sorry you're stuck. The snare wasn’t meant for you. Let me help you, please? I’m sure you have a home to go back to.” You smiled, never taking your eyes off its yellow ones. The wolf stayed still, looking at you almost incredulously before it laid down. It was still watching you, but now it was watching and waiting. The way it acted so... Consciously... confused you.
You’d dwell on it later. Right now you had a mission. You reached into your boot, rummaging around for the small knife you carried in there. Once you found it, you unsheathed it, causing the wolf to immediately let out a loud, deep growl, baring its teeth at you once again. “Hey hey hey... I know it looks bad, but I have to cut the rope,” you said, holding up your hands in surrender, hoping that the wolf would get the idea.
Slowly, it stopped growling again, letting out a huff and laying back down. You slowly approached its leg, keeping your eye on the wolf’s face to look for any sign of aggression. Its face was unchanging, it just kept an eye on you as you were to it. Carefully, you took the knife and grabbed the rope, cutting the wolf free. You quickly backed away once it was out, in case it turned hostile again.
Instead, the wolf did the same as you. Running a safe distance away before it turned back, looking at you once again. It looked at you for what felt like an eternity. Time seemed to slow, the slight wind seized, the forest turned quiet. Nothing broke the trance you seemed to fall into. It was just you and the wolf right now.
“Go home. You have others waiting for you, don’t you?” You spoke, your words coming out as a slight whisper. The wolf turned back towards the forest, where the trees grew thicker and the brush became more unforgiving. Again, the wolf looked towards you for a second before it ran into the thicket. Gone. You felt like you met a ghost.
“Goodbye...”
Meow
“No, Yume,”
Meow
“I don’t care if you’ve been through worse, it's cold,”
Meoooww
“Yume, it’s raining. You can’t go outside,” You scold the cat who is currently eyeing you while you prepare supper for the night. You caught a chicken the other day, so you were happily making some chicken soup. Or you were trying to if it wasn’t for the black cat who was currently whining his heart out next to you. “You’ll get snatched up by that wolf if you go out there,” you playfully threatened.
Yume grumbled out an annoyed mew, already familiar with the wolf you met and had previously rambled to him about. It’s been about 3 days since your first run-in with the chestnut-colored wolf, and everything's been relatively normal. You did your daily spell work, foraged until the days turned to night, checked your snares with hope in your heart.
And you never saw the wolf again.
But life goes on, and you’re hungry.
Meow... You sighed, dejected, tired of explaining to the cat that it’s cold, wet, and dark outside. Not the best weather for outside time. You knew he understood that, yet still... Meow. You put the spoon that you were stirring the soup with down, turning to the black furball with your hands on your hips. “Alright, out,” you groaned, shooing the cat away from the kitchen towards the living room. “It’s warm here, your favorite kind of temperature. Just lay down until dinner, okay? I’ll even put more wood on the fire,”
You did as you promised as Yume begrudgingly got on the couch, still boring his green eyes into the back of your head. You grabbed some wood from the stack that laid next to the brick fireplace and threw it in. You cringed as you flicked your wrist, watching as red-hot embers came flying out of your hand towards the wood, causing the embers to revive energetically as it painted the living room in a serene orange glow, illuminating both you and the black cat behind you. You slightly shied away from the flames, not too eager to be so close to such a large fire.
You dusted off your hands, turning around to give Yume a kiss on the forehead. “Maybe tonight we can do a tarot reading for the two of us, yeah?” You bargained, earning a content meow from the cat. “I knew you’d like that,” You chuckled, scratching behind the familiar’s ear before you went back to the kitchen.
The rain furiously beat against the windows of your small cottage; the wind howling as it whipped against the old wooden boards. The house creaked and groaned under the power of the storm, but you knew your protection charm wouldn’t allow anything to happen to the cottage. Luckily, there was no thunder booming or lighting running bright white cracks in the dark grey sky, it was just the rain and the wind.
You were humming the tune of a folk song you remember your mother singing as you chopped up some carrots and plopped them in the soup, unaware of the cat that was currently sneaking towards a window. Yume jumped up on the windowsill, expertly avoiding the terracotta pots filled with different herbs and flowers. The window was unlatched. An error on your part, but a perfect stroke of luck on Yume’s.
Yume bumped the window open, causing the shudders to catch in the wind and bang against the wall. You jumped, dropping the spoon into the pot, splashing the soup around the stove and onto you. You hissed at the feeling of hot soup on your cheekbone. You turned off the stove and walked back out into the living room, an annoyed look on your face.
An icy chill met your skin as you entered the room, causing your skin to rise with goosebumps. You shivered. The fire was now back to a low ember and the curtains furiously whipped around in the harsh wind, rain seeping in and dripping onto the floor. You groaned, realizing that you probably forgot to latch it. “Just my luck.” You sighed as you closed and latched the window, turning to go tend to the fire again.
That’s when you stopped mid-step, swirling around to look at the couch, noticing a lack of a Yume. “Yume?” You called out into the quiet house. No answer. Yume may be your familiar, but he was also a cat. It wasn’t like he was going to say “Hello” back, but he would come if called. Nothing. “Yume!” You shouted, a bit more panicked. Again, no sign of the furball. Quickly, you rushed through the house, checking every room. You looked under your bed, behind the dresser, under blankets, everywhere. But there was no Yume.
Anxiety seeped into your veins like viscous tar, clogging up your lungs and throat. “Y-Yume...?” You choked out, your mind and heart running a mile a minute. You felt tears well up in the corner of your eyes and they burned as they ran down your cheeks. You sat down on the couch, covering your face with your hands as you tried to calm your breathing. With each inhale you choked, coughing with trembling lips.
“It’s okay, it’s okay. Yume probably went outside. He’s a smart cat, it’ll be okay,” You whispered to yourself in a shaky voice, taking in a few more gulps of air. You willed yourself up on trembling legs, stumbling over to the coat rack. “It’s okay,” You sighed out once more, throwing on your coat and boots, stepping outside into the ferocious storm.
Wind licked the wet trails of your tears as rain battered against your body. Trees bent over to the will of the storm, looking ready to snap, as their leaves rustled together, producing an eerie symphony that made your hair rise. The sky was void of any light from the stars or the moon, covered in a thick layer of intimidating grey clouds. “Yume!” You called out into the night, desperate to see any sign of the lean cat. Nothing again.
You continued to call for Yume, walking deeper and deeper into the dense forest. It was getting darker the further you walked away from your cottage, making it hard to see the sharp stones and slick moss that covered the muddy forest ground. You reached into your pocket, fishing out the amulet that you always had on hand. It glowed. It didn’t give off light like a flame, but was enough to light your way.
The amulet let out a soft green hue as you continued to call for your cat, voice progressively getting more desperate. You treked deeper and deeper into the woods, the warmth of your cottage getting progressively farther and farther away. You couldn’t see it anymore. “Yume! Please!” You shout with a trembling voice, the biting cold and gripping fear threatening to push you down to your knees.
Meow!
You gasp, whipping around in a circle, trying to spot the source of the noise. You felt dizzy as you continued to turn, straining your eyes to peer through the thick trees and bushes. “Yume!” You yell again, continuing to turn in circles. “Yume! Please... Baby please,” You cry, bending to the will of your aching heart, falling to your knees. The wet, sloppy mud seeped through your coat and thin nightgown. The rain splashing dirt on your face. But you couldn’t care less. “Yume...” You sniffled.
Meow
Yume called back, his call sounding just in front of you. You looked up, expecting to see just your little black cat with his green eyes and soft fur, but what was actually in front of you threw you into a living nightmare. You froze, your heart dropping as you hyperventilated, lung burning from the cold. You couldn’t move. Your eyes locked onto the scene in front of you, like a cruel form of torture.
There, Yume was hanging by his scruff, in the mouth of a giant wolf.
“Yume!” You shrieked, finding your voice again. You reached out for the black cat, shying away when you registered that a wolf was right there. A big one. “Nonono, Yume, please...” You lamented, covering your mouth as sobs threatened to bubble their way out of your throat.
But instead of the wolf dropping a dead carcass at your feet, it gently let Yume down, allowing the cat to run over to you and lick at your tears with his scratchy tongue. You sniffled, reaching out a shaky hand to pull Yume towards you. You buried your face in Yume’s fur, letting out the sobs you were desperately choking down.
Yume let you hold him in the chilling rain, licking your face to comfort you. “You’re okay... You’re okay,” You choked out, hiccuping on air. Mew... Yume spoke up, nudging his sopping wet head against your cheek. “Okay”
Even if in your brain you knew everything should be fine now, that you should stop crying and get back home, you couldn’t move. Your tired heart chained you in place like a rock sinking to the bottom of the ocean. Meow... “Save the sorry’s for later... Just let me hold you.” You whispered, holding Yume tighter.
It felt as if all the strength you were fiercely clinging onto while you wandered through the forest had slipped between your fingers like sand. You wanted to lay there in the mud and stay there until morning, but you knew you had to get yourself together. Yume was shivering, you were shivering, and it was dark. Yet you couldn’t move. You sheltered Yume inside your coat as you tried to pick up the scattered pieces of yourself.
Whine...
You lifted your head from where you buried it in the wet cat's fur, catching the eye of the wolf you’d forgotten all about. It looked at you with drooping ears and a bent head, like a scolded puppy. It whined again, lifting one of its paws like it was going to step forward, but opting not to, hesitating. “You found him,” You whispered out, voice scratchy from the sobs that had wracked through your throat.
The wolf tilted his head in confusion. You would’ve too. Why are you talking to this animal like their Yume? Yume was special in a witchy way. He was your familiar. Like a loyal companion, but sassier. Yume was in tune with your emotions 9 times out of 10. Yume played around with you when you were happy, snuggled you when you were tired, comforted you through times of panic and sadness, Yume even “talked” to you, his meows weren’t for fun. Yume understood you because he was made for you.
A wild wolf wasn’t
Yet that didn’t deter you as you continued to speak. “Thank you...” You sniffled, looking the wolf up and down, running your eyes over its soaked fur. The same golden chestnut fur, now soaked and illuminated in a hue of green from the amulet that currently laid in the mud. Despite the lack of light, its yellow eyes seemed to glow. “Ah, you’re that wolf that was stuck in my snare...” You said, and the wolf took your friendly tone as an invitation to get closer.
Slowly, it approached you, ears and head still down to look less intimidating. You were too emotionally exhausted to be scared again. That, or you subconsciously trusted the wolf more than you thought. “You must be cold,” You commented, staring at the wolf's saturated coat. The wolf nudged at your own soaked coat, as if saying, “You too,” and you softly chuckled. It nudged you again, this time on your side, trying to get you to stand up. You didn’t. You couldn’t find the energy too, but the wolf kept nudging.
You gradually stood on trembling legs out of annoyance, tiring of the wolf’s persistence. You held Yume in your arms, still under your coat, as the wolf tugged at your dirty nightwear. You took a step forward, and the wolf went on ahead until it realized you weren’t beside it. It jogged back, pulling on your clothes again. “You’re a weird one,” You mumbled out, indulging the wolf by following it.
The wolf led you through the rain and mud. Looking back occasionally to check if you were still there. You didn’t know where it was leading you, but the trees thinned out, meaning you were moving away from the thick parts of the forest that are easy to get lost in. The storm continued to beat down on the three of you, creating a thin veil-like fog that hindered your ability to see.
But the wolf seemed unfazed as it continued to walk without fault, walking until an orange glow pierced through the mist. Your eyes widened when you realized it was your cottage. The wolf had led you back to your cottage. “What? How did you...?” You breathed out, looking down at the wolf who was now looking at you.
The wolf was definitely odd. It seemed more aware than the average lupus, like it could hear and understand you. Like it knew what you needed. Strange, no doubt, but you were a witch. You experienced strange things all the time. Hell, the entire forest you lived in was renowned for being supernatural and “dangerous” as in, magical.
Birds often brought you pretty stones and flowers, the squirrels liked to share their food with you, and the plant life seemed to come alive around you. Nothing in your life was “normal”, it was all strange. The wolf was probably like the birds and squirrels. A forest helper of sorts.
So with that rationalization, you left it be.
You walked up to your porch, opening the front door and letting a wet Yume free in the house. You turned around, locking eyes with the wolf once again. It was a few yards away, sitting in your front garden, looking even more humongous next to your tiny daisies and tulips. It was waiting for you to go inside. “It’s cold...” You said, “And you're wet...” The wolf tilted its head once again, unmoving. “I have towels... And a warm place to sleep until the morning,”
The wolf stayed seated.
“Come on,” You coaxed, patting your leg as an invitation for the wolf to move closer.
Slowly, the wolf stood up, trotting up to you and cautiously stepping into the house. You led the wolf to your living room, motioning him to stay put while you went to the linen closet to fetch some towels for the three of you. When you came back, you saw the wolf sitting awkwardly by the fireplace across from Yume, who stared at it unbothered.
You walked over to Yume, drying him off quickly before you turned your attention to the wolf who was dripping rainwater on your hardwood floors. “Here,” You said, opening the towel, offering the wolf to come closer so you could dry it off. The wolf padded over, its wet paws slapping against the floor. It turned around so its back was toward you.
You threw the towel over it, gently patting its fur down. Its fur soaked up the rain like a dehydrated sponge, causing the towel to saturate not even 2 minutes later. You threw the wet towel in a corner somewhere, grabbing the one that was meant for you.
However, when the wolf noticed this, it moved away, whining. “What’s wrong?” You asked in a soft tone. The wolf went over to the soaking wet towel that you discarded. It pushed it with its nose, looking back at you before repeating itself. “What? It’s wet, bub,” You chuckle, patting your leg in hopes that the wolf would come over to you.
Yet again it whined, going over to nudge at your still wet, heavy pajamas. “I’ll be fine. I have extra clothes, but you don’t have a spare coat, now do you?” You chuckled, wrapping the wolf in the towel. It huffed, begrudgingly letting you dry it off completely. “You’re a very pretty wolf,” You commented, running your hands through its fur.
The wolf leaned more into your touch, letting out a content sigh. Meow, Yume spoke up, “A boy?” You questioned Yume, who let out another mew. You turned towards the wolf. “You’re a boy?” You asked the wolf, looking slightly up at it. Its eyes were closed in relaxation, Yume meowed again in conformation. “So you would prefer being called a handsome wolf? Or do you like pretty?” You asked, not sure why you were doing so, but you talked to Yume all the time and he could answer back. Maybe it was just a habit.
The wolf didn’t answer, obviously, so you settled on using the two terms interchangeably. “Pretty or handsome, your fur is really soft,” You smiled, grabbing one of Yume’s pet brushes that sat in a basket next to the couch, beginning to brush the wolf's fur. Mew... Yume grumbled. “Oh hush, you have plenty,” You said, continuing to brush. The wolf slowly laid down on the plush living room carpet, being lulled to sleep by your gentle touches and the warmth of the cozy fireplace.
After a few beats of silence, you turned to Yume, a question rolling off your tongue.
“You went out there for a reason, didn’t you, bub?”
Yume hopped down from the couch, cautious of the sleeping wolf that laid next to you. Meow. “Alright, I’ll change, but then you better give me an explanation,” You stated, carefully standing up and padding over to your bedroom to peel the damp clothes off your body and getting dressed in new ones. Yume followed you, patiently waiting on your bed.
“Spill it,” You said as you sat down on the edge of the bed next to Yume.
Meow.
“I know you're a cat and you technically can’t have a conversation with me, but you can do other things,” You said, crossing your arms. Meow, Yume bit back. “I can understand you, yes. However, our bond only allows me to hear singular words from you. You say meow and I hear love. I can interpret that as “Aww Yume you love me,” when you could be saying “I’d love to kill you,” I just don’t know,” You explain. “Come on Yume, you know how our bond works.”
Oh, Yume did. And it annoyed the hell out of the familiar. The bond between a witch and their familiar is special, something that can’t be broken throughout time. Hell, Yume’s lived 6 different lives, all attached to a different you. Familiars can do a lot. They can help with spell work, protect you, guide you, and talk to you. Kinda...
See, Yume doesn’t meow just because. He’s actually talking. All that screeching he did earlier in the night before he caused this complete catastrophe? Outside. Outside. Please. Yume’s meows were still meows to your ear, but your mind conceived them as words.
However, one singular word couldn’t possibly explain this situation.
Yume jumped over to where you kept your oracle cards, all neatly stacked up next to your piles of books. The cat poked around at the cards a bit before picking up one in his mouth, hopping back to where you were. He dropped the card on your lap, looking up at you expectantly. You picked up the card.
Amaranth
Healing
Seems like you’d get a one-word answer anyway.
“Amaranth?” You inquired, looking down at the black cat. Yume said nothing, not making a single peep, just slowly blinking at you. “Healing... Cryptic you are, huh?” You chuckled, standing up to clean up the cards again.
Meow
“Jeongguk, Y/n, his name is Jeongguk”
“Jeongguk?”
The forest brush scratched against the delicate skin of your legs as you ran through the trees. You constantly checked over your shoulder, searching behind you for any sign of your pursuer who you could hear just a few feet away from you. Yume ran beside you, easily keeping up with your fast pace. Meow, Yume said, looking up at you. “I can’t go faster, Yume, I’m in a skirt!” You chuckled, continuing to run.
A spine-chilling howl rang through the forest, along with the heavy thumps of paws. You pushed yourself to run faster, expertly dodging the low-hanging branches and the sharp rocks that laid on the forest bed. You’ve run through the woods with a heavy skirt before, you’d be fine.
You just had to push your legs to go faster.
Suddenly, a clearing flooded your vision, only a few feet away. You could taste the sweet taste of victory on your tongue as you pushed yourself, hoping that the approaching march behind you was just far enough away that you could get to the clearing first. Thump. Thump. Thump. The thumping against the damp forest floor was getting closer...
And closer...
Until...
“Haha!” You cheered once you stepped into the beautiful forest clearing. The flowering grass was tall enough to reach your knees, and you enjoyed running your hand through the white daisies. You were about to turn around to face your pursuer, but the giant wolf tackled you to the ground instead. You let out an “mph” as the wolf playfully licked your face and rubbed its head against you. “Guk!” You chuckled, scratching the big wolf behind his ears.
The wolf energetically got off of you, jumping and bowing around, waiting for you to get up so the two of you could play more. You sat up, watching the wolf bound around with a smile on your face. “I’m tired, Guk” You puffed out, still catching your breath. The wolf, Guk, huffed, bending down playfully, still trying to get you up and playing.
Meow, Yume spoke up happily, his tail swishing back and forth gracefully. “Well I’m glad you 're not tired, but I am,” You chuckled, scratching the cat behind his ear before laying down on the grass. Guk calmed down and laid down next to you and resting his head on your chest. Guk let out a noise that sounded like a roar and a whimper mixed together, telling you that he was content. “You attached to my hip now, huh?” You teased, petting Guk’s head.
It was funny...
After that night in the rain, the wolf just kept coming back...
At first, you’d spot him watching you from the treeline whenever you and Yume were relaxing outside. Then he’d sit in your garden whenever you were inside. And eventually, he approached you one day while you were sitting on your quilt, reading a book.
“Oh, hello!” You smiled, looking up from your book to give the wolf your attention. He was standing just a few feet away from you. “I’ve seen you around lately. Are you my little guardian now?” You teased, resting your head on your hand, your elbow sitting on your knee. The wolf didn’t move, but lifted his paw like he wanted to. “It’s okay to come closer. I know you’re a nice wolf,” you reassured, and the wolf stepped closer.
And the rest was history, a pleasing memory to look back upon when the days dragged along like the march of elephants. The wolf went from visiting you weekly to twice a week, to every day. Eager to spend his day with you and Yume.
Once the wolf started coming around more, Yume insisted that you call him Jeongguk.
“Wolfie! You came back!” You giggled, kneeling down to give the big wolf a hug, burying your face in his soft chestnut fur. His fur always smelled so nice. Meow! Yume shrieked, startling both you and the wolf. “Jeez, Yume, I know. You’ve been saying that name all the time now. Is Jeongguk some deity I don’t know about that I’m supposed to worship? A spirit?” You sighed, one arm still wrapped around the wolf.
Yume walked up to the wolf, now standing directly in front of him. Meow! He yelled again, nudging his head against the wolf’s chest. The size difference between the two of them was absolutely comical. “Wolfie? You want me to call Wolfie... Jeongguk?” You asked, confused. Meow. Yume affirmed. But Jeongguk just sounded too... Human... “How about Guk?” You reasoned, “Do you like that?” You asked the wolf, to which he butted his head against your own. “I think that’s a yes,” you chuckled.
Now Guk is a part of your daily life. He hunted food for you, slept next to you while you read your books, chilled with Yume by the fireplace while you worked on your spells. There was this one time you were making a potion for someone who came by, asking for your help against nightmares. (You guess legends are still being told about you throughout town) You were stirring the ingredients in your cauldron, freakishly bored as you waited for the camomile to steep properly, and Guk noticed. Guk began playfully bounding around the room to try to cheer you up. And it worked.
Just a bit too well...
You thanked your late mother for making you study those water spells.
Since then, whenever you had the odd person come by asking for assistance, Guk just silently stayed by your side.
What you didn’t know is that Jeongguk didn’t trust those people. He could smell it, the disgusting stench of fear that wafted off of their bodies whenever they spoke to you, and how it became more potent once they saw him. The smell of dirty ice and sweat. He knew that they also scared you, the way you fidgeted with your fingers and avoided eye contact. The smell that wafted off of you was awful. Jeongguk didn’t like it.
He only wanted to smell your sweet scent of honey and lavender that you had whenever you were happy.
Jeongguk remembered exactly what he was doing when he got trapped in your snare that day.
He was stealing.
It was his turn to hunt for the rest of his pack, and he was... Slacking, to say the least. He’s been slacking for a while now. Ever since Hoseok found his mate, Jeongguk has been feeling left out, and it’s making him less like himself lately. Jeongguk was the only one in his pack that hasn’t found his mate yet, and it’s throwing him in a slump.
Yes, Jeongguk enjoyed hunting, but he hasn’t been feeling up to it lately. He hasn’t been feeling up to most of the things he enjoys. Hunting, singing, playing with his niece and nephews. Nothing. But what he knew right now was that he was supposed to get food, so he will.
The way you set your snares has always impressed Jeongguk. Not only were they practical, but you made them pretty... somehow, and they smelt so good. He knows about you vaguely from his hyungs. Every now and again, Yoongi or Namjoon would go out to watch you, making sure you weren’t doing anything that could be a threat to them. You never were.
Namjoon had even commented on how you seemed to just... fit in the natural ecosystem of the forest effortlessly. Your presence never bothered the animals, and your hunting never caused any disturbance to the cycle of life here. It was like the forest had adopted you, accepting you as one of its many children.
But Jeongguk wasn’t worried about that right now. Right now, he needed to raid your snares and get back home so everyone could eat.
Jeongguk trotted through the forest with no urgency, easily finding his way around the trees and bushes, spotting one of your snares in the distance. It had caught a rabbit. Unconcerned, Jeongguk wandered its way. Only to get caught in a snare himself. “That wasn’t there before...” Jeongguk thought to himself, kicking the rope, expecting it to loosen.
It didn’t.
Try as he might, the rope didn’t relent. He kicked, wiggled, and whipped around, all to no avail. Jeongguk panicked. What was he going to do? Sunset was soon, and he needed to get back home to his pack.
He started to think about everything he’d done wrong in the past month. He should’ve played with Yunho that one time, he never should’ve growled at Namjoon that one winter night years ago. God, how dumb was he to never verbally remind his hyungs, niece, and nephews just how much he loved them?
Rationally, Jeongguk would be fine, whether or not he made it out of the snare. One of his hyungs would eventually come looking for him, laugh at the situation he was in, and help him. But Jeongguk wasn’t thinking rationally. Jeongguk could only think about what he did to deserve to perish alone in a stupid bunny trap. He was an alpha for heaven's sake! And a flowery bunny trap was what thwarted him? Not only did he feel like he was going to die, but he felt like his death would be a humiliating one.
“Oh no...” He heard a soft voice whisper behind him.
Jeongguk whipped around, his yellow eyes landing on your soft figure. You had a basket in hand. Several types of flowers were woven into the delicate straw braids. A white cotton cloak rested delicately on your shoulders, and you also had flowers in your hair. Your light pink blouse, skirt, and apron made you look cute in his eyes.
Growl...
He wished he could appreciate it more.
You may look and smell absolutely ethereal to Jeongguk, however you were still a stranger, and he was in such a vulnerable position. What if you were like a siren? Luring him in with your beauty to get him to let his guard down before you struck... Or a secret sadist? Or worse, what if you were a trick of the fae? It sent a shiver down his spine and a growl out of his mouth.
Home. Home. I have to get home.
Forget about the pretty fae-siren-whatever lady.
The wolf inside him was frantic and confused, running around his mind on overdrive and channeling his frenzied emotions into unfounded anger. Jeongguk couldn’t help it. He was scared. It didn’t matter if rationally he was half the size of you. He was scared, and he felt threatened.
“I-It’s okay! I’m not going to hurt you,” You stuttered out, but Jeongguk had cotton in his ears. Your words didn’t reach him, so he continued. Growling and snarling like some wild animal. Well... He was half a wild animal, but he was still human, he still had a conscious. And that conscious was screaming code red.
“I-I know you're scared... I’d be scared too,”
Your voice felt like a sweet melody once it reached Jeongguk’s ears. You were soft-spoken. He liked that. Having enhanced hearing meant a lot of simple things gave him pounding headaches. But your voice felt like a warm blanket to him. Sweet honey and soothing lavender. Jeongguk stopped growling, looking up at you with curiosity. Where’d you get such a pretty voice? Why hasn’t he heard it before?
“I’m sorry you're stuck, the snare wasn’t meant for you. Let me help you, please? I’m sure you have a home to go back to.”
Why are you even talking to him? Let alone apologizing? For all you knew, he was a wild wolf, incapable of comprehending the Korean language. Yet you were still talking to him in that saccharine voice. Let me help you, please? He inwardly chuckled. Were you really going to get close to a wolf?
The answer was yes because you ended up delicately cutting the rope around his leg.
Jeongguk quickly put a good distance between you and him, still somewhat running on adrenaline, and it looks like you had the same idea. Jeongguk looked at you, your figure framed by the vibrant flora and the towering trees. You looked... welcoming. Everything made you look so small and you just seemed to fit like his hyung had said.
You were exactly what he imagined every time his hyungs mentioned you.
“Go home. You have others waiting for you, don’t you?”
But Jeongguk didn’t want to. He knows he was a bit... hostile at first, but now that he’s calmed down and has gotten a better look at you, now that he’s heard your sweet voice, he wanted to stay. He wanted to stay and pick flowers with you or something. You looked nice, and Jeongguk wanted to see if he was assuming correctly. You have others waiting for you, don’t you? He does, you’re right. But that doesn’t mean he likes it.
Reluctantly, Jeongguk trots off.
I’ll be back.
And he kept his word.
He did come back.
Every day he greeted you with an inner-smile and left you with a lick goodbye. Every day he wished he could stay for longer, that he could stay with you throughout the night. He dreamed about wrapping you in his arms and snuggling you until the sun came up, making breakfast with you in the kitchen, and reading with you in the morning sun’s rays.
And sure, it scared him just how quickly he grew attached to you, but it felt so right. He’d play with you during the day and dream of you at night. He’d tell his hyungs everything about you and get teased for it, but he didn’t care. He’d write a book on you if he could.
“Hyung, you should’ve seen her! She looked so pretty in her yellow skirt.”
“Hyung, she can grow flowers! Like, with magic! Namjoon hyung would love her,”
“Hyung, do you think she’d like my singing?”
Every day Jeongguk had a new thing to gush about. He’d wake up early to run to your house, spend the afternoon with you, and come home with stories about the adventures he had with you that day. He’d ramble on and on about your outfit to Seokjin because “Seokjin hyung likes fashion,” and rave about your amazing magic to Namjoon and Yoongi who both knew a spell or two. Hoseok would listen to him when Jeongguk retold the fairytales you’d read aloud, and Jimin and Taehyung would ask him about anything he’d left out.
Nobody complained, in fact, they encouraged it. They were happy because Jeongguk found someone.
“Guk, you talk about this girl a lot. Is there something you want to tell us?” Hoseok had asked him one day at dinner after Jeongguk finished explaining why he came home with a bandana delicately wrapped around his neck that smelt so sweet. “What do you mean hyung?” He asked, stuffing a spoonful of rabbit stew into his mouth.
The rest of the boys looked at each other, and Seokjin suddenly stood up, gathering all the kids and taking them upstairs to get them ready for bed. “Guk, have you ever thought that maybe you bonded with her pretty... Quickly?” Namjoon asked, trying to make Jeongguk connect the dots.
Jeongguk quirked a brow, “No...?” He said and Taehyung groaned, facepalming. “Think about it a little harder,” Jimin said, but Jeongguk shrugged once again. Taehyung rolled his eyes, “One word, Guk, four letters. Mate.” He explained, getting tired of beating around the bush. Yoongi smacked Taehyung in the back of the head, whispering out, “Don’t be rude,” through clenched teeth.
Jeongguk snickered. Taking Taehyung’s comment was a joke, but stopped once he realised that nobody else was laughing. “Haha... What?” He asked. Namjoon took a deep breath. “Think about it for a second Guk, like really think about it. When you think about Y/n, what do you feel?”
Well, that was an easy question. Jeongguk feels happy when he thinks of you. He feels all warm and fuzzy, like he was wrapped in blankets in front of a fireplace. He woke up cheerful, ready to see you every morning and went to bed content, thinking about what the two of you would get up to tomorrow. You made his heart happy with every smile, giggle, and hug. Everything you did made Jeongguk feel... Alive. Like all his life, he was running on fumes and now he finally found his fuel. You.
“She makes me feel like all my life I was colorblind, and it wasn’t until I met her that I could see the beautiful colors of the world. Like I was deaf and now I can hear. She’s... There isn’t a word to describe it.” He gushed, a woozy smile plastered on his face. All the others looked at each other, having a silent conversation.
Jimin cleared his throat. “Um, Guk... You know that’s how we’d describe our mates right...? So it’s possible that... You know,” He cautioned, chuckling awkwardly. Jeongguk paused, shooting his head up from where he was playing with his soup to look his brothers in the eyes, “No... You don’t think...”
“Oh we definitely think,” Taehyung mischievously smiled.
“B-but she doesn’t even know who I am. I’m just a random wolf to her,” Jeongguk rambled on. “Why don’t you just, tell her?” Yoongi asked, and Jeongguk groaned. “It’s not that simple! She doesn’t like people. Like, they scare her...” He explained with a pout.
The rest of the boys rose a brow. “So, you 're just going to pretend to be a wolf for the rest of your life?” Yoongi asked. Jeongguk sighed, “I mean, I guess-” “That was not the right answer to the question!” Jimin interrupted with a groan, but Jeongguk groaned even louder. “What am I supposed to do? Shift one day and say ‘Hey I’m Jeongguk and I’m actually a werewolf. By the way! You’re most likely my mate, meaning we’re destined to spend the rest of our lives together!’?” He asked sarcastically, not noticing Seokjin who stood behind him with an unimpressed look on his face.
“Well, you better figure it out. Before you get hurt.”
Jeongguk jumped out of his skin, whipping around to look the eldest in the eye. Seokjin didn’t wait for Jeongguk to answer, “Mates are serious Guk. Once you’ve found them, you’re bound to them for good, no take-backsies. You get hurt, they get hurt. Just... do the right thing, okay?” He said, sitting back down in his seat so he could finish eating.
Jeongguk felt a heavy weight on his shoulders. Seokjin was right, mates were serious. It was like the “red string of fate” fairytale that grandparents told grandchildren. The two of you were like puzzle pieces that fit perfectly together, even if you didn’t realize it. Meeting your mate just kinda happens. There’s no shocking touches or overwhelming clarity that happens when you meet, you just know. Jeongguk guessed that always knew, even if he didn’t put a name to it.
“Once you’ve found them, you’re bound to them for good,”
Just do the right thing. Alright, simple.
Jeongguk has no idea what to do.
You laid in the middle of the clearing, ignoring the slight scratch of the grass below you as you basked in the morning sun, a content smile on your face. You were glad to give your legs a break from the good run you had only 5 minutes ago whilst being with your two loves. Yume was cuddled into Guk’s stomach while Guk rested his head on your stomach. To an outsider looking in, you’d look like a happy family.
“I’m glad you got caught in my snare that day, Guk,” you whispered to the wolf as you gently pet his fur. Guk blinked and looked up at you, tilting his head slightly as if he was questioning you. “I mean, I’m not glad that you were scared and were stuck in the first place, but I got to meet you,” you explained, smiling down at the wolf, scratching the spot behind his ear that made him melt in your hands.
Guk just nestled into your stomach farther, letting out a soft huff. His chestnut fur looked vibrant against the soft green grass, like wispy brushstrokes of the most delicate oil paintings, elegantly blowing in the wind. Yume looked utterly adorable, curled up in his stomach. The sight of the two of them relaxing soundly in the afternoon sun made your heart happy.
You sat up slightly, rousing Guk from his light sleep. “Sorry, bub,” You whispered, reaching over to your upper arm to gently scratch the scar that was getting a bit irritated. You were happy that you decided to wear a sleeveless blouse. The scar was acting up lately. It was getting sensitive to clothing... Again.
Whine
You looked down, raising an eyebrow at the wolf, who now looked upset. “What’s wrong?” You pouted. You hated to hear him whine. Guk sat up, cautiously maneuvering around Yume as to not wake him up, before nudging his snout against your upper arm. “What?” You chuckled.
Guk nudged your upper arm again, and this time you looked down, letting out an ‘ah’ sound before sending the wolf a small smile. “It’s a burn scar,” You said, feeling slightly disheartened. Guk tilted his head slightly, nudging the scar again. “Someone... burned me,” You explained, not necessarily feeling too sensitive about the situation since Guk can’t understand. It’s nice to talk about it every once in a while. Even if it was to yourself.
You lightly touched the scarred skin, running your fingertips over the pink bumps and lumps. “I was chased out of my village for being a witch. It was actually quite ridiculous, I mean, who actually grabs a torch and a pitchfork to chase down a witch? I thought that only happened in fairy tales.” You snickered, trying not to think too hard about it and unintentionally trigger the phantom pain. Humor was always an easy way to deal with the pain.
Guk whined again. You cupped his pouting face and gave him a sad smile. “It was 6 years ago, bub, I’m okay. It still hurts sometimes, but if I stay away from triggers, I’m good,” You reassured, giving him a kiss on the forehead before laying back down in the grass.
Jeongguk looked down at you from where he was sitting up beside you, feeling... Well, he doesn’t know what he was feeling but it wasn’t good. How could someone hurt you? Y/n? You were literally as sweet as the honey and as soft as the lavender you smelt so strongly of, who would permanently scar such a wonder like you?
You fed the birds and squirrels whenever you had food to spare. You talked to the flowers in your garden. You freed a “wild” wolf from on you your traps. Who would think that you were anything less than a gem? People were disgusting. That’s what Jeongguk concluded. That your village was full of disgusting people who probably made fun of newborn babies.
What Jeongguk is trying to say is that those villagers were assholes, and he’d hunt down those assholes if he had to, just for you.
“Come on Guk, lay down. Let’s nap for a bit,” You beckoned with your eyes closed, opening up your arm to invite the wolf to snuggle up next to you. How could Jeongguk ever deny you? Guk laid back down, resting his head on your chest with a content sigh. “That’s better.” You smiled, wrapping an arm around him.
Meow...
Yume grumbled, annoyed at the fact that the two of you were so selfishly leaving him out of the cuddle party. He stretched out his back a bit before he moved in closer, laying next to your heads. Meow. “Quit whining, Mr. Grump, and nap,” You playfully scolded, reaching over to give Yume a couple head scratches before you put your arm back around Guk.
This was nice.
This wasn’t nice at all.
Jeongguk wasn’t planning on falling asleep. He planned on snuggling you until you either woke up or he had to go. But he messed up. Your soothing scent of lavender lulled Jeongguk into the world of dreams before he could realize it, and now he was being jolted awake with a sharp, stabbing pain.
He bit his tongue. Jeongguk felt like his skin was crawling with bugs. Like the claws of a falcon were digging into his flesh and tearing it away in chunks. A deep, burning pain shot through his bones, spreading outwards through his muscles like a hot poker. He wanted to claw his skin off and throw it into the woods, shed it like a lizard. Your once soothing embrace was now suffocating.
Why was he feeling like this? Simple. Werewolves have 2 forms, human and wolf. Werewolves can stay in their human form for however long they like unless something triggers them to shift, whether that be the full moon, a rise in aggression, or something agitates them. However, they cannot stay in their wolf form forever. Much to Jeongguk’s dismay.
Different werewolves can stay shifted for different amounts of time. Like Yoongi, he can stay shifted for a week straight, the complete opposite of Jimin who can only stay shifted for a maximum of 8 hours.
Jeongguk’s shifting abilities were on the shorter side, 12 hours. He always meets you in the morning and parts with you at a reasonable time in the afternoon, so he’s not forced out of his furry body. But he fell asleep... for the entire afternoon.
His bones cracked and popped, poking against the inside of his skin, forcefully shifting him into his human form. His flesh stretched and morphed, bending to the will of Jeongguk’s reconstructing anatomy. His snout shrunk, paws grew into hands, and ears retracted. Usually, shifting went by smoothly, with little discomfort. But Jeongguk was trying to go against his body's natural will to change, making the process unbearable.
You were still asleep in a faraway dreamland with your arm wrapped around Jeongguk’s body, oblivious to his agony. To Jeongguk, you looked so beautiful sleeping on the grass. Tiny flowers framed your delicate face, and the sun’s rays laid across your vibrant skin like the most expensive silk. Jeongguk wished he could admire the way your eyelashes rested against your cheeks or the way your tousled hair acted as a halo, but he was couldn’t. Not now.
Please, Jeongguk thought, please not now.
Cautiously, Jeongguk wiggled his way out of your grasp, doing his best not to wake you or Yume. Crack. His spine started altering itself, elongating and stretching his skin, sucking in his fur, hiding it away from view. His hold on his furry body was loosing its grip, and he started to shift faster. Jeongguk probably looked like some hairy human abomination and not the pretty kind.
You stirred a bit, face contorting in dissatisfaction once Jeongguk had slipped out from under your arm. Jeongguk froze. He stood statue still, praying that the sickening snaps and cracks that came from his body weren’t loud enough to wake you or Yume.
You mumbled out some incoherent words, scaring Jeongguk enough to scramble away from you. He watched with his heart in his throat as you stirred some more, only a foot in front of him. You shifted so your back was to him, finally getting comfortable enough to enjoy your dreams again. He felt a wave of relief wash over his contorted body. But that relief didn’t last long.
Suddenly, another bone in Jeongguk’s body forcefully cracked into place, catching him off guard enough that he let out a painful groan that woke Yume up with a start. The black cat turned, his eyes widening at the sight of the currently deformed Jeongguk who was trying his hardest to hold back his transformation, although he was more human than wolf at this point.
Breaking bones, stretching skin, huffing, claws and teeth where they shouldn’t be.
Yume was more surprised that Jeongguk looked like a Lovecraftian monster while he was mid-transformation rather than the fact he was a werewolf. Meow? He yawned, utterly confused, but not surprised. “H-Hey... Yu-Yume...” Jeongguk choked out in a whisper. It was getting harder and harder to hold back his groans and grunts of pain as his bones twisted and skin ripped.
“Ack-” Jeongguk let out a growl-like yelp, biting harshly down on his tongue, causing it to bleed as his fangs pierced the pink flesh. He let out another yelp and curled down into a ball of pain, panting into the grass. Meow! Yume yelled, running over to check on the groaning werewolf, who was now mostly transformed back into a human, except for a few patches of fur and some claws. His muscular body and smooth, golden tan skin now fully on display.
Both Yume and Jeongguk didn’t notice you start to stir again.
You slowly blinked your bleary eyes open, hissing at the harsh rays of the orange sun that invaded the comfort of your irises. “Wha-” You grumbled, voice scratchy. You shifted, noticing a lack of body warmth and ticklish fur laying next to you. “Yume? Guk?” You called, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes as you sat up, unconsciously covering your scar on your upper arm, which was red and irritated from the grass.
You heard a strangled groan sound from behind you, and you looked over your shoulder with squinted eyes. You gasped, suddenly feeling wide awake when you saw a very naked man sitting only a foot away from you. A scream bubbled its way out of your throat as you crawled away backward, now breathing just as heavily as he was.
“W-Who- What?” You blubbered out, “Who are you?” You trembled, feeling that familiar feeling of shackling anxiety beginning to muffle your senses. The stranger looked up, immediately catching your eye with their pained, yellow ones that screamed of silent agony and fear. You looked away, the power his eyes gave off became too much for you. But as you did, you spotted your fuzzy familiar nudging his head against the stranger's leg.
You froze, “Yume!” You yelled, grabbing the cat's attention. “What are you doing- Did you not learn after the last time? Get over here!” You barked. Meow! Yume yelled back, not budging from his spot. “Guk?” You echoed the cat, furrowing your eyebrows. You anxiously looking back and forth between the man (who was now in less pain) and the disobedient furball.
Meow!
“Man? Yume-”
You stopped, realization suddenly dawning on you like a mallet to a gong. The startling sound bounced off the walls of your skull. There was no Guk. There was Yume, but no fluffy wolf, just this random man. Guk wouldn’t leave you alone when you were sleeping. When you were vulnerable, he was practically attached to your hip until he went back home. He growled when squirrels got to close to you.
You pieced together the broken fragments of Yume’s explanation. “Man... Guk... What? No-” You mumbled, your confusion quickly turning into a sense of shrouding fear. “Y/n- I can explain,” The man said in a strained voice, still choked from the amount of pain he just went through. “H-How do you know my name?” You stuttered, curling into yourself out of defense and fear.
“My- My name’s Jeongguk... Or Guk, as you call me...”
If the world revolved around you, it just came crashing down, right on top of your head, giving you a concussion. It felt like the comfortable reality you had built for yourself, full of pretty flowers and furry friends, was now cracking and crumbling on the floor at your feet. Sharp shards of broken dreams and hopeful wishes sinking painfully into your soles. You were bleeding out your happiness and hope.
No... Not again, you thought, tasting the bitter flavor of anger on your tongue. The taste oh so familiar. It was the only thing you could taste as a lost 16-year-old, betrayal fresh in her mind. “Jeongguk... Guk... You’re- You’re not Guk,” You chuckled bitterly, shaking your head in disbelief. “No... Nonono please tell me this is some cruel dream... Please... Guk is a wolf, he’s just a wolf...” You lamented, finally looking the man in the eyes again.
Those eyes, those goddamn yellow eyes that once softened your heart, now stabbed it with a dull, jagged knife. “Guk...?” You asked, hoping that it wasn’t true. Hoping to the deities in the sky that you would wake up, and find your furry friends sleeping next to you again. That he’d say no. The man nodded slowly, a look of shame plastered on his face. “Y-Yes, I’m Guk,” He said. “Guk- Jeongguk- You... lied to me?” You sniffled, your anger boiling down into nothing but... pain. “What? No- Y/n, I didn’t lie-”
“Then what did you do?!” You cut Jeongguk off, letting your tears fall. “What did you do Jeongguk? Tell me,”
“I- I just didn’t tell the truth...” He murmured.
You scoffed. “You just didn’t tell the truth... What are you, Jeongguk? A mimic? Were you trying to gain my trust so you could one day- I don’t know- stab me in my sleep?” You accused. “What? No, I’m a werewolf...” He explained, trying his best to give you space since 1) you were getting frantic and 2) he was still naked. Meow! Yume yelled, and you broke.
“Don’t tell me to calm down, Yume!” You spat, now recognizing how comfortable he was with Jeongguk. Unbothered, he just sat next to him. “You knew about this, didn’t you?” You asked in disbelief, completely gobsmacked at the idea of your own familiar hiding such a huge thing from you. When he knew just how intimidating other people were to you. “Oh my god...” You breathed, unable to wrap your head around the fact that the wolf who you’ve been hanging out with for the past weeks was not what you thought they were.
He could hear you, he could understand you. Everything you said or told the wolf, who you thought couldn’t comprehend a peep of what you were saying, understood. He knew more about you than you wanted anyone to know, and now you realized that everything you thought you knew was a lie. Or maybe half the truth. But still, not the truth.
He knew everything about you, but you knew nothing about him...
He was a man. Guk, or Jeongguk, was a man. He was... Half man, half-wolf. A werewolf. Guk was Jeongguk and Jeongguk was a werewolf. You’ve heard a bit about them, you knew the basics, but you had no idea and when you looked back at it, all the subtle human-ish things Guk did that were now sending you huge red flags. You felt stupid. Absolutely naïve.
You stood up, avoiding the stares you were getting from Jeongguk and Yume as hot tears rolled down your face. “Y/n!” Jeongguk called, reaching out for you. “Y/n please, let me explain-” You stepped away, “Don’t. Don’t say my name. Don’t come near me. Just... Goodbye.” You seethed, sending him a sharp look as more tears fell from your eyes. You turned that look down to the familiar, “I’m mad at you... But come home soon.”
And then you left.
Jeongguk could only watch with a broken heart as you walked away, heading back home. He wanted to chase after you, to explain himself, to tell you that he never meant to hurt you, but his shins haven’t snapped into place yet. So he was left helpless on the itchy forest floor with his heart in his throat and a cat who really couldn’t help in this situation.
Reality had not dawned on him yet. Everything felt so surreal. This was the most cliche but horrible situation he could ever be in, and it felt like a bad dream, a nightmare. Soon he would wake up and have enough time to give you a lick goodbye and then run back home, just in time for lunch with his hyungs.
But this wasn’t a hopeful daydream. This was reality.
And in reality, you left.
He hurt you and you left.
“No...” he whispered, “Nonono,” Jeongguk could feel the weight of reality start to push down on his shoulders and press on his head. Panic quickly came back to him and settled itself in his bones, shaking him to his core. Jeongguk clawed at the soft Earth below him, pulling himself up to his feet.
He only took a couple steps before he collapsed again, feeling the aftereffects of trying to fight his transformation as white-hot pain shot through his legs and up his spine. Meow, Yume cried, trying his best to get the man to sit down and take a breather. “No, Yume, I can’t- She’s gone- I can’t-” He sobbed, now acutely aware of the streams of tears that ran down the soft skin of his cheeks.
“Please...” He croaked, not sure who exactly he was begging to, but he hoped that something would pity him enough so they would snap their fingers and make everything okay again.
Jeongguk pressed his forehead into the dirt, pulling harshly at his brunette locks while his tears flowed like rivers. What was he going to do? You obviously didn’t want to see him again, and it broke his heart. He loved the time you spent together, running through the grass, working in the garden, listening as you read to him. He developed a bond with you, a strong one, and now it’s broken.
Just a tattered dream surrounded by the shards of broken hearts.
Two weeks.
That’s how long it’s been since you found out that Jeongguk was a werewolf.
Two weeks.
You would like to say those two weeks passed by smoothly, but they went as smoothly as crying late into the night could be. It was madness. Everything in your tiny cottage reminded you of Jeongguk, and even worse, the entire forest did too. You couldn’t even check or set your snares without thinking, “Oh, yeah, I hope the rope didn’t burn his skin,” It was torture, really, how your once calm, safe haven turned into a memory graveyard full of grief.
The wind whispered his name to you, the sun reminded you of his warm fur, the rain brought you back to that night, that one night, when he became a part of your world. It ached, everything ached. Your heart, your body, your mind. You trudged through day and night, with a heavy body and a fried mind, just trying your hardest to even stand up straight.
Even worse was the pain. Now and then waves of red hot pain would shoot through your body, causing you to break out in a cold sweat. Late at night you would grovel in pain. You thought the phantom burn from your scar got worse, but that didn’t make sense since it was more than your scar now. Nothing seemed to make them go away, and you tried every potion in the book, every spell in your grimoire. Nothing.
But this wouldn’t be the first time random waves of pain shot through your body.
You were slowly learning to live with it, even if it felt like you were constantly missing something. You didn’t know what you were missing. You were training yourself to live with the pain and emptiness, but if you were being honest, it was getting worse, and it was happening quickly. It got harder and harder to get out of bed or walk around the cottage. It felt like you were a flower, slowly wilting...
For the sake of your sanity, you chose to overlook that fact and live life like you always did, doing the best you could to erase Jeongguk from your memory.
But there was the persistence of Yume, who begged you to talk to him, which never happened. Each time you heard his name muttered out of the cat’s mouth, you sent him a melting glare. 9 times out of 10 he would leave, but there was a 10% chance he would stand his ground and bug you until you left. Your own familiar, who was like a platonic soulmate, was turning on you.
Without Jeongguk you felt lost, like something important was taken from you.
But at the same time, the thought of him filled you with hurt and a sense of betrayal.
“Should I talk to him?”
“No- Yes- No he hurt you- Yes. Don’t lie, everything felt warmer with him around”
It was turmoil.
When you cried into the late hours of the night, you weren’t quite sure what exactly you were crying for anymore. Did you still feel betrayed? Or were you grieving the loss of him in your life? Did you regret those harsh words you spat at him or not? Would you take them back if you could? When the bushes rustled, was that hope in your heart or anger at the thought of him being there?
You didn’t know, but why didn’t you know? You were supposed to hate him. He betrayed your trust. He didn’t tell you the truth. He could’ve revealed himself many times, the sooner the better. You’re not ready for a human relationship yet, you 're not ready to have human friends, or half-human friends. You weren’t ready for people. You can’t do it, you can’t trust them.
No, not after last time.
It would only end with you getting burned.
No, you would erase him from your memory, even if that felt grossly wrong.
A heavy knock at your door startled you out of your thoughts. You looked up from your cup of tea to look at the door, seeing a shadow at the bottom of it. At first you thought it was Jeongguk, so you stubbornly left it be, anxious at the thought of seeing him again. But the person knocked again. And again. And again. Reluctantly, you got up and answered the door, readying yourself to confront the werewolf. Maybe chew him out or wrap him in an embrace, but to your surprise it was a stranger, not Jeongguk.
He had dark brunette hair and even darker brown eyes that contrasted against his perfect, slightly tanned skin. You assumed he was older than you due to his sharp and mature features, like his shapely jaw and nose. He wore a dark blue tailcoat with a silk vest underneath that matched in color. The white shirt that peeked out was clean and pressed, hugging his chest tightly. He was dressed oddly formally, from his regency scarf to his polished shoes. He stood out. Maybe he was from a nearby kingdom? He definitely wasn’t from your village since hanboks were the style of dress there.
His obvious wealth and status made you feel awkward in your light, pale pink skirt and blouse, and it didn’t help that the apron around your waist was dirty. You swore to do your laundry after this.
“Oh, um, hello?” You asked, somewhat suspicious of him. You knew that every now and then people got lost in the woods or came looking for witches, but they rarely looked... Rich. Then again, it wasn’t like your huge village witch hunt was a kingdom secret that only the middle class in your tiny little village knew about. The man’s face contorted into an eerily delighted smile that sent an icy chill down your spine. “Hello!” He chirped.
Your brows furrowed. “H-Hello...?” You asked again, waiting for him to tell you why he was on your doorstep. You felt the soft fur of Yume grace your ankles and you calmed slightly. “Are you perhaps Y/n?” He asked, leaning forward. You leaned back, closing the door just a little bit more. “Who’s asking?” You questioned, not particularly eager to give out your name to just anyone, let alone confirm their suspicions. If he already knew your name, he most likely knew the entire twisted story the villagers liked to tell to their children to scare them from entering to forest.
His smile delved into a smirk for a second before he schooled his features again. “My name is Jackson, and I’m in need of a potion, one that can cure sickness,” he explained, his accent and way of speech sounded foreign and high-class. “Sickness is a broad term and there is no one potion for it. Does this sick person have scurvy? Tuberculosis? I need to know,” You pressed. You were used to people coming by for a “cure-all” potion that could cure anything, but different sicknesses require different potions.
The strange man, who you now knew as Jackson, coughed awkwardly, “It’s... Dysentery,” He explained, and you internally cringed, feeling the sudden urge to make a trip to the nearest river and take multiple baths. “Ah... Yes... Dysentery. A nasty disease, but I have a cure for that,” You said, watching the way his eyes slightly lit up with hope.
“You do? Well, that’s amazing, what must I do?” He asked. “Well... Um, it’ll take some time to complete, so come by at around sunset today and we can discuss payment.” You smiled sweetly, hoping that you appeared as professional as possible. His face scrunched at the word “payment,” for a moment, before smiling again. “Of course,” He drawled, “I’ll be sure to see you at sunset tomorrow. Good day, pretty lady.” He said as he bid you farewell.
The pet name made you feel gross and making that trip to the river sound 10x more appealing, but bit your tongue and waved goodbye to him kindly. Once he was far enough away, you closed the door, making sure to lock it. Meow... Yume whined in a worry tone. “I know, my anxiety is through the roof as well, and he was a bit sketchy, but I need the distraction.” You admitted, heading straight to your workroom.
Yume chased after you, swinging at your heels with his paws. Meow! He yelled, doing his best to grab your attention. To warn you. You ignored him like you usually did nowadays. It’s not that your bond or friendship was strained, it was still the same, but you needed something to get your mind off of... the recent incident... This was the perfect opportunity to do just that.
You opened the door to your workroom, scrunching your nose at the dust that covered the bookshelves filled with ingredients, your desk, and your iron cauldron. “Has it really been that long?” You thought aloud, taking your finger and swiping it through the dust on your desk. You sighed, snapping your fingers and watching with a smile as the broom in the corner started to sweep and the duster started to dust.
Magic was really convenient sometimes.
You giggled, letting them do their thing as you gathered your necessary ingredients. Your spell book opened and flipped to the necessary page when you passed. You smiled at it. Technically, it wasn’t alive; it was just connected to your magic like the broom and duster, but it still felt alive to you. Like company.
“Alright, that should be everything,” you said, dropping your armful of glass bottles on your desk and filling the cauldron with water. You stepped back, flinching as you lit the wood under it with a flick of your hand. Once the water was boiling, you organized the ingredients and look towards your book for the first step.
You stopped suddenly when a wave of pain shot through your body. You winced, grabbing the table for support. It felt like the devil's period cramps, but all over your body. Muscles contracting and bones aching. Yume ran over, coaxing you down on the floor to give your wobbling legs a break. “It’s okay, Yume, I’m fine,” But the cat cut you off with a seething meow.
You don’t know what's wrong with you, but Yume does. But you 're just so fucking stubborn and he can’t communicate it properly to get you to understand that you are dying. Slowly but surely your wilting petals of life will shrivel up entirely. You needed Jeongguk, not just because Yume thought it was time for you to heal and have someone else besides him to talk to, but because you were bound to him, and Yume knew this.
Yume knew a lot of things.
You let out a shaky breath once the pain subsided and reached up to grip the table, using it to support you as you stood back up, groaning at your now stiff leg muscles. Yume whined, watching as you continued from where you left off, a slight limp in your stride. Yume could only watch as you worked, humming that same tune your mother used to sing to you before bed.
And for once in his long, long life, Yume was scared.
Two weeks.
That’s how long it’s been since you found out that Jeongguk was a werewolf.
Two weeks.
Those two weeks were hell for Jeongguk
Before he met you, Jeongguk was a bit off, but now he was a husk of his former self. There was no part of his body that didn’t ache and burn with silent pain that made him wake up in a cold sweat and writhe around in his bed until the sun rose. Even the feeling of the soft sheets underneath him felt like sandpaper on his clammy skin.
His breathing was constantly heavy. He huffed and puffed through the night, swallowing down pained howls and biting his tongue. You were constantly on his mind. Jeongguk didn’t realize just how tightly he bonded with you without even saying a single word, but he did. Your name was constantly on the tip of his tongue and your smiling face ran through his mind on repeat.
Jeongguk could do nothing but groan as his heart was held in a tight vice of regret and hurt. His mind was hazy, like he was being blindfolded with a strip of cheesecloth, and his ears were plugged with cotton. Over time, his toes and fingers grew numb, and the tip of his nose was constantly cold. If he knew just how awful it felt to sever a bond with a mate, he would’ve revealed himself to you sooner.
He would’ve told you the truth sooner.
His hyungs could one watch idly as grief ate away at their youngest brother. They could only ease his pain with cold cloths on the forehead and force-feeding him soup. Logically, they knew he brought this upon himself, but that didn’t mean they wanted to see him die over it. Jeongguk could only take so much before his body gave in and shut down, and they were desperately trying to avoid that.
“We have to do something, Hyung. He’s not getting any better...” Jimin had whimpered somberly one night with tears in his eyes outside Jeongguk’s room after they had just fed him some dinner. Namjoon sighed, “I know... Like I’ve been saying, the only thing I can think to do is go to her and beg her to help him,” He stressed, he’s been repeating this idea for a while now but nobody would listen to him. Just like he predicted, Jimin shook his head.
“Remember what Seokjin Hyung said? ‘Your hurt is their hurt’ or something. She’s probably in pain too. Besides, why would she? Jeongguk said she doesn’t trust humans and at this point, I don’t think she’d trust anything. Let alone werewolves,” Jimin pointed out. “But they’re mates, she’d come,” Namjoon rebutted, not believing that you would let Jeongguk suffer, even if he hurt you. Jimin was not as hopeful. “How would you feel if Hyejin lied to you from the beginning? That everything you thought you knew of her was a lie. Would you immediately run back?”
Namjoon sighed and shook his head. He was tired of seeing Jeongguk in pain when there was a solution living in the same woods as them. But his brothers were stubborn, not eager to grovel at the feet of someone they barely knew and leave all their hope in the palm of a stranger's hands. No, they thought that they could fix it themselves without his mate, which was a stupid sentiment. Werewolves were prideful creatures, and it was their deadliest flaw. They were desperate to prove that they weren’t helpless in this situation and they could do something for the youngest, who was like their baby for as long as they all could remember, but they just couldn’t.
The only way to save Jeongguk was to save his severing bond with you. No matter how hard they tried and how much they hoped, losing a part of yourself ate away at you until the end. All of his brothers were so pessimistic. Namjoon’s gut was telling him that no matter how much you should justifiably hate Jeongguk, you wouldn’t. You couldn’t.
“Jimin just stop. We can’t help him, the only person who can, is in those woods somewhere. Swallow your pride and realize that this is bigger than us,” Namjoon pleaded through gritted teeth. Jimin frowned, his cute eyes scrunching in anger and outrage. He didn’t say anything, because he knew Namjoon was right, but he wasn’t ready to admit it. None of them were ready to admit that they were useless and helpless. Not even Seokjin, who knew for sure that they absolutely had to. He just turned on his heel and walked away, the sounds of Jeongguk’s pained whimpers like a dog whistle on his ears.
Namjoon watched him go with worried eyes before he knocked and entered Jeongguk’s room once more, getting hit with his sorrowful scent of rotten roses that became so familiar nowadays. Jeongguk rolled over on his side to look at whoever just entered his room and slumped a bit when his eyes caught Namjoon’s. “Hey,” Namjoon greeted, coming over to sit on the edge of his bed, softly playing with his tousled hair that was saturated with sweat.
Jeongguk let out a low hum of acknowledgement, closing his eyes to seek any sort of relief from his pain. Namjoon’s eyes drifted to the hand-drawn pictures that his kids, along with Yoongi’s little girl, had given him to give to Jeongguk when they told the children that he was sick and that they couldn’t see him. He remembered the worried look on their small faces, and the promise of “He’ll be okay,” that he told them felt like acid on his tongue.
Because he was slowly losing hope in his own words.
“I’m sorry, Guk,” He whispered to the youngest, watching as his moonlit face curled into a weak frown before he peeked one of his eyes open. “What for? It’s my fault that I’m like this. I lost her...” He sniffled, grimacing as another wave of pain shot through his body. “I just wish I could make it better,” Namjoon said, eyes tearing up. He was unable to look at Jeongguk’s dishevelled appearance anymore and opted to look at the night sky outside the window next to Jeongguk’s bed, his blackout curtains drawn open.
The sun had gone down not that long ago...
“But I could help, I could go get her and she would help- No, I will go get her, I promise” Then everything will be okay is what he wanted to say, but he honestly didn’t know of that was the case. “You think she’d see me again?” Jeongguk asked in a gruff voice, peering up at the elders side profile with pain-filled eyes. “I hope so...” Namjoon whispered, staring directly at the bright white moon, praying a silent prayer.
Jeongguk coughed, “I hope she’s okay,” He whispered, and Namjoon felt his heart crack. Of course Jeongguk is still putting you above himself, it’s Jeongguk. Jeongguk would gather an army for you... Namjoon was about to open his mouth and reply with the sad truth that you probably weren’t, that you were probably in pain too and that would be another good reason to go get you, but a scream of terror ripped through the silence of the night, cutting him off.
Jeongguk immediately sat up, ignoring his body's protests. “Guk, what are you-” “That’s her, that’s y/n... Something’s wrong,” Jeongguk said, cutting Namjoon off. His mind was on code red again. Y/n’s hurt, not safe, danger. The wolf that lived in Jeongguk’s mind, no matter how bloody and tattered its fur was, or how tired its bones became, it would push through it all.
Jeongguk would push through it all.
Before Namjoon could stop him, Jeongguk lept out of the bed with the last of the strength he had and ran out into the night with nothing but his pajamas. Passing by his other baffled hyungs who thought they’ve seen a ghost.
“Jeongguk!”
“Alright, I just need the rue...” you said, reaching over to grab the last ingredient off the table and plop it into the bubbling cauldron. You stirred the mixture with a large wooden stick, mesmerized by the glittery swirling liquid. It was a nice shimmery pink color that reminded you of the tip of sunset roses and it smelled like wet earth.
Once you were sure that all the ingredients were mixed in properly, you took an empty glass bottle from the shelf behind you and dipped it into the pot, filling up the bottle with the pink potion. You corked the bottle and checked outside the window. The sun was about to meet the horizon. Perfect timing. That Jackson man should be here soon.
You cleaned up your workroom until it was back to the way it looked before, making sure to be careful with the glass. Once you deemed it suitable, you grabbed the potion and walked out into the living room, sitting on the couch, resting against the wooden backing. Yume was relaxing on the other end. But once he saw you sit down, he instantly came over to check on you, making sure you were okay. You just smiled and let him do his thing.
Once he deemed you okay and safe, he lied down next to you. Mew... He sighed, butting his head against your arm. “I know Yume, everything seems scary nowadays,” you chuckled somberly, scratching him behind the ear. Meow? “Am I worried?” Meow. You sighed. “I’m worried about a lot of things. Myself, you... Jeongguk,” You admitted, causing Yume to whip his head around towards you.
M-Mrow? He choked out. “Yes. I’m worried about Jeongguk. I’m still... Upset. But I’m also worried,” You explained, fighting with the angel and demon that laid on your shoulder who were arguing with each other.
“He doesn’t deserve our attention. He lied,”
“But there must’ve been a good reason, right?”
“A good reason to lie? For all we know he could’ve killed us.”
“But he’s had plenty of chances, yet he didn’t. That says something, doesn’t it?”
A sudden knock sounded at the door, startling you out of your character vs self conflict that was going on in your head. You and Yume exchanged a glance, feeling the air around the two of you shift suddenly. Meow... Yume said. “It’ll be fine... Yeah. I’m sure it’s nothing and we’re just paranoid,” you reasoned, standing up and grabbing the potion before making your way to the front door.
Jackson was there in the same clothes he was in this morning, with the same smile. “Hello!” He chirped, smiling even wider. “Hi...” You mumbled. He was just as oddly chipper as before. You wonder if his breakfast is laced with... Something. “Nice to see you again. Is it ready?” He asked. You nodded, “Yep, I uh, have it right here.” You lifted up the potion so Jackson could get a look at it. He watched the swirling liquid with bright eyes, his smile stretching wider.
“Perfect!” He exclaimed, and you waited for him to pull out something like a pouch of coins or a trade offer, but he did neither of those things. “Um, I think 5 coins will be enough.” You coughed awkwardly. But Jackson didn’t move or reach for anything. “Y/n, darling.” He drawled, “Can you make an exception just this once? Why do you need common money, anyway? I mean, it’s not like you can go back to your village and spend it,” He smirked.
You were taken aback. You’ve had customers who thought that your prices were too high, even if you thought they were pretty low considering you were basically selling magic in a bottle, but you’ve never had a customer passively aggressively insult you to your face. What he said wasn’t even true. You couldn’t find everything in the forest. “I-I’m sorry but one, it’s none of your business what I do with the money. Two, I don’t make exceptions. Three, please don’t call me that.” You frowned.
“How about I make you an offer, you give it to me and I give you a good word in the village?” He asked again.
“No,”
And for the first time since you met him, Jackson frowned, looking less than impressed. He chuckled, but it wasn’t humourous at all. You backed up a bit, hiding the potion in your pocket, quickly becoming more and more uneasy as the air thickened. “No?” He laughed bitterly. “Dear, you must’ve been in these woods for a long, long time. Don’t you know who I am?” He seethed. You backed up even farther, but this time Jackson took a step forward.
“Jackson Wang. Prince of Gwangju. Pleasure,” He quipped. “And I don’t really appreciate being told no,” He said with a fox-like grin. You never considered yourself meek, per se, but having Jackson tower over you with less-than innocent intentions made you feel like the bunnies you caught in your snares.
You’ve heard his name before. Jackson Wang. He ruled the entire Gwangju kingdom, the kingdom which your village resided in. You remember your mother telling you that the capital was a whole new world, that everything was different yet the same. Their Korean was different, yet you could understand it. Their clothes weren’t the hanboks you grew up with, but they were still respectable garments. Their food was different, but you could taste the familiarity.
But the one thing your mother warned you about was the royal family who ruled with iron fists
Yet, you didn’t want to back down and surrender belly-up.
“Well, I’m sorry, your majesty, but you’ll have to pay,” you said with the scraps of confidence you haphazardly picked up and pieced together. Still, your voice shook. Jackson took a big step forward, causing you to back up until you were completely in your house again. “What a shame, really. All this time spent secluded made you forget how to talk to people like me. Sad.” He fake pouted, stalking closer. His tailcoat gave him a sharp and threatening silhouette.
You back up further until you were eventually back in the living room. Yume stood up from his position on the couch and quickly ran over to you, sensing that fear that was radiating off your body. He was about to ask what you were so afraid of when his eyes caught sight of the tall man. Yume immediately growled low and threatening, his fur sticking up and tail hung low.
Jackson scoffed, upturning a lip at the cat. He looked between the two of you, as if gauging what to do next. “Are the rumours true?” He asked suddenly. “W-What?” You breathed out, unable to take your eyes off of him in fear that he would strike. “The rumours, you know, the ones about the witch in the woods being deathly afraid of fire?” He smirked.
You felt your body freeze at the insinuation. Your muscles locked up and your hands became clammy. You couldn’t move. Fire. The word sent a chill down your spine and bile up your throat. “Aww, poor witch,” Jackson pouted patronizingly. “You are, aren’t you?” His eyes lit up when he saw the fear embedded in your eyes. Yume suddenly hissed when Jackson took another step forward and he kicked the cat to the side in return.
Yume hit the floor with a painful thump, groaning out a choked meow. “Yume!” You yelled, but before you could run over to check on him, Jackson grabbed you by the arm. “Give it to me,” He demanded, resisting the way you fought against his hold. “No!” You retaliated, desperate to get the man off of you and take care of your cat. You were in fight of flight mode, and for Yume, you’d surely fight.
Jackson got tired of your squirming and threw you down on the ground. You also landed with a thud, feeling dull pain shoot through your body. “I really didn’t want to do this, but I need that potion,” He seethed, flicking his wrist in a awfully familiar manner. You were reminded that it was the hand motion most commonly used to summon flames once his hand erupted in angry red embers.
You screamed, frantically crawling away from the man who held one of your worst fears in the palm of his hand. “Poor witch,” He sneered again, taking his time to waltz over to your paralyzed figure. Meow! You heard Yume wail. Go! You shook your head, “No, I can’t! I can’t leave you...” Meow! He screeched again.
You reluctantly gave into Yume’s request with teary eyes. Grabbing the nearest object, which so happened to be the potion, and chucking it at Jackson. You missed, but your effort was enough to distract him for a second, allowing you to scramble to your feet and run out of your back door into the woods. “You bitch!” You heard Jackson roar, and you didn’t even need to turn around to know that he was running after you.
The sun had completely set by now, leaving you alone in the dark once again. You squinted your eyes, doing the best you could to navigate with what little light the amulet around your neck gave off. After last time, you decided that wearing it would be better in case there was an emergency, and you're glad you did.
You ran under the cover of darkness, vaguely aware of the slight illumination that came from Jackson’s hand as he chased after you. You jumped over rocks and powered through thicket, doing the best you could to weave through trees in an effort to lose him, but it wasn’t working. Jackson was still hot on your tail.
Tears burned their way down your cheeks, and you felt the prickling of phantom pain begin in your toes and upper arm. Another wave of pain was coming, both the new pain and the one your burn scar gave off, and at the worst possible time to. Still, you pushed on, your breath getting progressively heavier. “You can’t run forever!” Jackson called from behind you. He was closer than you thought.
Try as you might, you really couldn’t run forever. Eventually the dull phantom pain became full blown, and you were forced to your knees by an invisible executioner. Just as you were falling, a fireball whizzed its way over your head. You screamed, scrambling up against a tree away from the burnt grass. You choked down a sob, watching as Jackson came closer and closer with his flaming hand and frustrated expression.
“You’re giving me a lot of trouble over a potion,” He snapped, huffing and puffing along with you. “Magic is sacred you asshat!” You snapped back. The pain in your bones and upper arm was bringing out your aggression. Jackson snarled, sending a fireball right beside you. A warning shot. You screamed again, unable to hide your terrified sobs.
Jackson clicked his tongue. “We can make a deal, Y/n. I can spare your life and in return, you can make me another potion. How does that sound?” He asked, and you could tell this was his final offer. But you’d rather die than do business with a man like him. “To hell with that,” you seethed, the phantom pain in your bones slowly started to dissipate as exhaustion took its place.
You rested your head against the scratchy bark of the tree, watching as Jackson raised his hand, ready to fire. “Well, at least I can get the honor of killing Gwangju’s infamous witch,” He snickered. You closed your eyes, letting your tears flow as you anticipated that familiar white hot burn to resonate on your skin again. You waited to burn and melt.
Your body, exhausted and paralyzed, gave up, unable to pull itself back together to get you out of the situation. So you accepted it. readying yourself for the end. You thought about everything you’ve done up until now, all the things you did and didn’t do and whatever lied between.
Is Yume okay? If I die, he dies, so I guess it doesn’t matter. What will we be reincarnated as next? I’d like to be a dragon.
How will it take until people realize that I’m gone? That the witch is no more?
Jeongguk... What about Jeongguk?
...I’m going to die.
You waited, and waited, and waited for the fire to meet your skin... but it never came. What came instead was the gargling sound of Jackson screaming in pain and the familiar grunts and growls of a wolf. A very familiar wolf. You shot your eyes open, catching sight of a gigantic chestnut wolf whose jaw was embedded in Jackson’s neck.
You could only watch as the angry yellow eyes of the wolf glistened in the low burning embers of the fire. Blood flowed out of Jackson’s neck like a freshwater stream, dripping down his expensive tailcoat, staining the forest floor red. His face twisted into a look of pain, and you could see the life slowly drain from his deep russet eyes. That’s the last thing you saw before Jackson’s fire completely dissipated, leaving you in the small green glow of your amulet.
Darkness quickly surrounded you in a suffocating hug, delicately covering your eyes and smoothing over your figure, like a mother protecting her child. You were left with nothing except the sweet embrace of the dark and your small green glow. You could only shake like a winter’s leaf as you listened to the piercing sounds of Jackson’s screams and the low roar of the wolf. Of Jeongguk. Before the screams stopped and familiar sickening pops and cracks filled the air in their place.
Soon, the noises ceased, all of them, and the silence was more deafening that the wails. You could hear ringing in your ears, like the loud church bells of the nearby village were playing their beckoning song in your skull. The synchronized pounding of warriors that beat against your head was stomach churning. The world seemed to stop turning. As if Kronos decided he needed to step away from his duties and freeze the world in its place.
Everything was still.
“Y-Y/n?” a rough voice whispered.
Jeongguk’s sunken in face drew closer into your meek light, a look of worry and fear painted on his tired and somewhat bloody features. His mouth was covered in blood, but you didn’t care. All you could do was smile weakly. You couldn’t find your voice, like it was snatched from your throat and thrown into the bleak woods. You croaked out a hum instead. “Oh, Y/n...” Jeongguk sniffled, reaching out to gently cup your face in his hand. You expected yourself to flinch, but you didn’t. You couldn’t move.
Unconscious tears continued to run down your face, but you couldn’t even find the energy to care. You were tired. Your body hurt, your mind hurt, your heart hurt. Everything was fuzzy, and the only guidance you had was the warmth of Jeongguk’s hand. You unknowingly leaned further into his touch, slowly letting your consciousness slip. You finally felt safe enough to let your eyes close and succumb to the rough grip of exhaustion that desperately yanked at your mind. Finally.
“Nonono. Hey- Don’t fall asleep. Y/n you can’t fall asleep,” Jeongguk pleaded, and even if you wanted to listen, you couldn’t.
The last thing you remember was ripping your arm out of the invisible shackles that held your body down in order to put your hand over Jeongguk’s.
“It’s okay...”
When you woke up, it was just as quiet as before, but this time your ears could properly process the silence. You were laying under a plush, warm fur blanket, and a soft mattress gently cradled your body. Your head laid on a pillow, slightly inclined so you weren’t completely flat, but not fully sitting up either. It was comfortable, warm, safe.
Wait, where are you?
You shot up, wincing at the strained muscles that complained at the sudden movement. Your legs felt like hell, and you could tell your eyes were awfully puffy. Your muscles whined, begging you to lie back down, but your spine argued with them. It quite enjoyed the stretch. The different parts of your body fought with each other, some crying in agony and some relieved to be in motion again after becoming so stiff.
Something suddenly shifted slightly beside you, and you whipped your head around to see a sleeping Jeongguk, whose head was rested on the edge of the bed. Your eyes widened a bit. He looked better than he did the last time you saw him, less sickly looking. His face was still somewhat sunken in, and he was covered in tiny scratches. Why is he here?
You moved your eyes off of him to take a look at your surroundings. They were completely unfamiliar. The bedroom was bigger than your living room back home. The floor was a dark spruce color, while the walls were made of nice, polished oak logs. The ceiling was quite high, and it ended in a point, more oak logs being used as rafters. The house was most likely a large cabin style mansion, if this one bedroom was enough to go off of.
It was awfully homey. All the furniture looked handmade and the bearskin rugs and blankets looked hand-skinned as well. From where you sat, you could see little carvings in the wood that looked like they were done by children. There were also different medical supplies and clothing strewn about.
Looking down at yourself, you realized you were only dressed in your chemise and drawers, but you didn’t mind. They were modest enough. You could tell someone had bandaged up wounds that you were unaware that you had. Bandages wrapped around your knees, ankles, elbows, and waist and little patches of red peaked through the pristine white. There was also a bandage around your burn scar, but it was completely clean. It was like someone knew your scar was sensitive.
You looked over at Jeongguk again. A small, grateful smile tugged on your lips.
A door to your left suddenly creaked open, revealing a tall, broad-shouldered man who held a tray of food and basic first aid supplies. He gently closed the door, keeping as quiet as possible, but once he looked up and caught your eyes, he almost dropped the tray.
His eyes were a similar brown to Jeongguk’s, but when the light bounced off of them correctly, it sparkled with a deep ocean blue. He stood like a deer in headlights. Looking at you like you were a ghost. You slowly scooted away towards the opposite end of the bed, getting more unnerved by his presence as the seconds ticked by.
The man noticed this and slowly set the tray down on a nearby table, raising his hands in surrender. “I’m not going to hurt you. I’m Seokjin. I’m Jeongguk’s older brother,” He explained, flashing you a reassuring smile. You said nothing, opting to nod your head in acknowledgement. The man, Seokjin, took your silence as an invitation to continue explaining the situation you were in.
“You, um... Jeongguk came home last night, and you were passed out. I took you up here and bandaged your wounds. You’re at our pack house.” He said, and you nodded again after a beat of silence. Seokjin left out the less than pretty details of the night. The blood, the tears, the frustration. The fear in his youngest brother’s eyes. But you were awake, so it was all okay. For him, at least.
Seokjin cleared his throat. “May I have a look at your bandages? I brought soup as well, it’s chicken noodle.” He asked. You hesitated. For all you knew, his whole explanation could’ve been a lie. A ruse. He could be like Jackson, using his charms to get on your good side and- “It’s okay to say no. You don’t look to be having an emergency, so I can leave you alone for now. Unless you have any questions,” Seokjin reassured.
You looked at him incredulously, eyeing him up and down, He looked tired. Dark circles lined under his eyes, and his posture was slouched. Despite that, he was quite handsome. His dark brown hair was styled into a mullet and he wore a silk white hanbok. He had plump lips, a kind smile, and overall soft features. He looked completely harmless.
But you weren’t ready, not yet.
Suddenly, a familiar feeling of dread dawned on you, and it was like you were thrown back into the rainy woods. You jumped, “Y-Yume! W-Where’s my cat? Is he okay? Please tell me he’s okay,” You begged, and you could feel your hands start to shake. If you didn’t cry your tear ducts dry last night, you’re sure you’d be tearing up by now. But everything in your body was exhausted.
Seokjin motioned his hands for you to calm down, letting out a string of soft ‘Hey’s’. “It’s okay. There um, there is a cat downstairs. A black one. He appeared not long after Jeongguk brought you here. Guk said he was yours, don’t worry,” He spoke softly. You laid your face in your hands, taking in a few calming deep breaths. It’s okay. It’s okay. It’ll be okay.
“Do you want me to go get him?”
You looked at him and shyly nodded.
Seokjin quickly scurried out of the room and rushed down the stairs. You could hear the voices of other people, but couldn’t make out what they were saying. You shakily laid back down in the bed, your body was tired of holding itself up, it was time to give it a break. Your eyes felt heavy again, but you were determined to keep them open until your partner in crime was safe in your arms again. .
Groan....
Jeongguk stirred besides you once more, but this time his eyes peeked open. You turned to look at him, watching as he was slowly roused out of a deep sleep. His tired brown eyes shot open after catching your own, flashing a golden yellow before they returned to their original color. You expected him to react like Seokjin had and stare at you paralyzed, but instead he carefully raised his hand to cup your face, looking at you like an enigma, like you were a specter.
You let him. He looked at you with eyes full of regret, sorrow, and surprise. Tears quickly welled up in his eyes, and they eventually overflowed, traveling down his tired face like brackish waterfalls. His face scrunched up as he tried to hold back his tears, but it didn’t work. “I’m sorry,” He croaked out, hanging his head in shame. “I’m so sorry,” He sobbed again.
You put your hand on top of his again like you did last night, taking a look into his deep brown eyes that were blurred with tears. “You’re okay right? This isn’t a dream?” He sniffled. You nodded. “I’m okay, this isn’t a dream.”
You let him cry for a few minutes, softly reassuring him with gentle touches and soothing whispers before you shook him, grabbing his attention so he’d look up at you again. “What are you sorry for, Jeongguk?” You asked. You needed to know if he was truly sorry or just felt like he had to say sorry. “Everything... I’m sorry I lied. I’m sorry I broke your trust. I hurt you... And I’m sorry. Please... Please don’t hate me,” He sniffled, reaching out with his other hand. You took it in your own, and the two of you sat in silence for a second.
You sighed. “I should hate you. I should be turning away and asking Seokjin to drag you out of the room,” You said. Jeongguk physically recoiled at your words and looked away, squeezing your hand just a little bit tighter. “But I can’t,” You continued. “I can’t hate you. No matter how hard I try to convince myself that you don’t deserve a second chance and that I should forget about everything. Something tells me otherwise. Whether that be the wind whispering your name in my ear or your figure in my dreams. I just... Can’t.”
Jeongguk didn’t look back up at you, but slowly rested his head in your lap, slightly hovering in case you rejected him. Once he realized you weren’t, he sunk down comfortably. “You’ll have to make it up to me, though,” you whispered to him. Jeongguk nodded, taking your hand and placing it on top of his head, a silent plea for you to play with his hair.
You complied.
Not long after, the door creaked open again and a blinding flash of black ran into the room, jumping up on the bed and tackling you into the mattress. Meow! Yume screamed, nuzzling his face into your own. “Hi bub,” you smiled, your voice still sounding awfully dry. You raised your unoccupied hand to pet the shaking cat, who let out multiple mews and cries.
Seokjin stepped into the room again, watching the scene before him with a sad smile. Yume sat on your chest, Jeongguk nuzzling into your lap. Under any other circumstance, Seokjin would’ve been lovingly teasing Jeongguk about his show of affection for his mate, and how they looked like a family, but Seokjin knew that this was the one of the circumstances where he couldn’t. He could tell there was still some tension between the two of you.
Once Yume settled down, he made himself comfortable by laying on top of you, but not before he turned to Jeongguk and gave him a whack with his paw. It wasn’t meant to hurt him, he just wanted to let the werewolf know he was also annoyed with him. It startled Jeongguk awake from his half-sleep state, and he grumbled, closing his eyes and snuggling into the blanket on your lap, chasing the sweet embrace of sleep.
Seokjin rolled his eyes at his youngest brother's actions before he turned to you, giving you that same sweet smile. “I’ll leave you to rest. I’m sure you need it. We can talk more in the morning,” He said. He turned away and reached for the door, but stopped when you called out to him. “S-Seokjin?” You called. He turned around with a raised brow, waiting for you to continue.
“Thank you...”
“My pleasure.” He smiled.
So here you are,
Sat on the bed with Yume next to you, facing three men who sat on chairs at the foot of the bed. Seokjin, Jeongguk, and a man named Namjoon. Namjoon had pretty blonde hair and honey tan skin that was slightly darker that Jeongguk’s. He wore a hanbok that reminded you of the one your dad would wear. A pretty mocha color with embroidered sleeves. You remember wearing them when you were little, but when you got run out of the village, you had to make your own clothes.
Granted, skirts caught on things all the time. But you tried to make pants once, and it was a complete flop.
Seokjin cleared his throat. “So um... We’re here to talk to you about... Something...” He smiled awkwardly. “And you have to promise to hear us out,” You hummed, waiting for someone to continue and tell you what was going on. Seokjin was about to speak again before Namjoon interrupted him. “Have you been experiencing pain? Like agonizing pain? And recently?” He asked, ignoring the pout Seokjin shot at him.
You nodded with a raised brow. How did he know that? Why would he know that? Did they have something to do with it? The pain was worse than the phantom pain you got when thinking about your scar... They didn’t look like witches... Can they have done it? “How recent?” He inquired. “About... two weeks ago,” you answered. All three of them made a face before Jeongguk looked away, ashamed. “What..?” you cautioned. The feeling of worry in your chest grew, taking place of your heart. All this emotional turmoil is taking a strain on you.
“What do you know about werewolves?” Seokjin asked, ignoring your previous question. You shrugged. “Not much. I know werewolves exist, they live in packs, they don’t interact much with others outside the pack, and they can turn into gigantic wolves,” You listed off, counting what you knew on your fingers. “Hold on,” Namjoon interrupted, raising a finger in objection. “If you knew werewolves could turn into gigantic wolves, why didn’t you suspect Jeongguk of being one?”
You sighed. “The amount of people who meet werewolves is slim. Like, 2% of the population. Who ever thinks that they’re in the little group? The 2%? I may be a witch, but I don’t encounter many magical beings.” You asked in retaliation. Namjoon let out a little ‘oh’ as he put his finger down and slumped in his chair.
“Anyway,” Seokjin interrupted, shooting a sharp look at Namjoon. “While all those things are true, there are some other things about us. Like, for example, we have soulmates,” Seokjin said somewhat cautiously. This time it was your turn to let out a small, curious, ‘oh!’ “Yes, it’s quite the fairytale situation. But there is also a um... Downside to having mates.” Seokjin sighed. You cocked your head, downsides? Downsides to having love that lasts a lifetime?
“Mates are bound to each other by soul since the first time they develop a bond. Whether that be a friendship or whatever. However, if that bond is strained in any way, it’s awfully painful and can lead to... Death,” Namjoon explained for Seokjin, who both side-eyed Jeongguk for a second. “Do you see what we’re saying...?” Seokjin inquired. You shook your head slowly. “No... I mean, I don’t think so...” All three of them sighed.
Yume suddenly stood up with a ticked expression on his furry face and whacked your arm, causing you to look down at the familiar with an angry expression. “Hey!” You whined, but Yume ignored you. He scampered across the bed and jumped into Jeongguk’s lap, looking the werewolf directly in the eyes. Meow. He said. The three men looked at each other, confused, eyeing the cat incredulously. “Mate?” You echoed Yume, who turned to look at you with unimpressed eyes. Meow. Yours.
You looked up at Jeongguk. He looked back at you with eyes that were as confused as they were tired, while Yume continued to completely baffle the other two men with his sentience. “We’re... We’re mates? Like soulmates?” You asked him, and his eyes lit up before he nodded shyly. You took a deep breath, leaning further back into the pillows you were propped up against and allowing yourself to sink in the information.
“Mates are bound to each other by soul since the first time they develop a bond. Whether that be a friendship or whatever.”
“Wolfie! You came back!”
“Guk! Stop messing with my daisies!”
“However, if that bond is strained in any way, it’s awfully painful and can lead to... Death,”
“Yume, it’s okay, it only hurts a little bit.”
“Yume, I’ll be fine. I’ve dealt with pain before, don’t look so sad... Please?”
You were tired. You thought once you established your life in the forest, nothing interesting would happen to you ever again. No more people, no more betrayal. You would quietly live and then die with nobody but your cat beside you and move onto the next, hopefully better, life. And you were okay with that.
Sure, you were lonely some- a lot- of the time. Yes, you caught yourself reading fairytales where the prince would come and sweep their lover off their feet and take them to a faraway dreamland without the cold and dark. You would often pretend that there was someone out there who the universe made for you, and that they would find you one day. But it was always just a pipe dream. Something to get you through the days.
You love Yume, yes, but Yume couldn’t possibly be your everything, and now that your finding out your little pipe dream was actually true and the universe- or whatever magical higher being- made you soulmates with a werewolf who happened to live in the same forest you ran away to... It all seemed so unreal, yet perfect. Your soul was missing a piece, and you didn’t even know it. Was all that yearning and longing a sign? Were you meant to know about this so you could dedicate your life to searching for your other half?
There was one side of your brain that was on overdrive, screaming red alert and begging you to retreat back to your home, where it's warm and safe, away from the scary reality that is people and interacting with them. It yelled at you that you would be fine if this is how it ended, because at least it was nice and easy being in your little comfort zone. You didn’t need people; you didn’t need a soulmate, everything was fine until he came around.
But the other part felt like it had just healed its broken wings and flew for the first time in years.
That side of your brain whispered praises and words of encouragement over the screaming and shouting of its counterpart. “It’s going to be okay, it’s a bit sudden. But we’ll be alright, won’t we? I know it’s scary; I know the thought of relationships is daunting and downright terrifying at some points, but you have to heal, and this is your chance to do it right now.”
“Just sit and heal, no need to rush.”
Seokjin cleared his throat, breaking you out of your stupour and bringing you back into the real world where a nervous Namjoon, worried Seokjin, and terrified Jeongguk sat, all silently waiting for you to say something else. “That was... That’s what the pain was all about?” was the first question to come out of your mouth. Seokjin nodded, “Yes. But don’t worry, it’ll go away you just have to... Spend some time with Guk,” He explained.
You looked at the werewolf in question. He was shaking like a leaf, ready to fall from a tree in the winter. He shied away from all eyes in the room, opting to just twiddle around with his fingers and pretend that he wasn’t about to collapse on the floor like his body so desperately wanted to do.
“We’ll um, give you some privacy,” Namjoon said, standing up along with Seokjin and quickly scurrying out the room without saying anything else. It was just you and Jeongguk. “Jeongguk,” You called, grabbing his attention. He slowly and cautiously looked up at you through his brunette bangs that rested softly against his face, obscuring the rest of his features. “Yes...?” He asked hesitantly.
“Come here,” You said, patting the space on the bed next to you where Yume was previously. You looked around the room for a second. He wasn’t there anymore... Maybe he went out with Seokjin and Namjoon. You shrugged, that didn’t matter right now. What mattered was the scared werewolf man who was sitting next to you, as stiff as a board while he held his hands to his chest so he wouldn’t put them somewhere you didn’t like.
You sighed and rested your head on his stiff shoulder, causing him to flinch for a second before his body unwillingly relaxed a bit. “Soulmates, huh?” You said, looking out the open window to the dewy yard where you saw a couple of children playing. “Yeah, soulmates,” Jeongguk coughed, playing with his fingers again. You placed your hands on top of his, getting him to stop and look at you for once in the past 20 minutes.
You shot him a reassuring smile. “We can make this work. I... want to make this work.” You said and Jeongguk’s eyes lit up with hope as he gripped your hands tighter. “You do?” He asked with a shaky voice, as if you would tell him your words were a joke. “Yes. Jeongguk, I feel things for you that even I can’t explain, things that are beyond magic. No matter how hurt I was, I still wanted you,” You admitted, looking down at your interlocked hands with a warm heart.
But you frowned. “I’ll admit, these feelings may be euphoric, but they’re also scary... It dangerous how much I feel for you when I barely even know you. So please grant me this wish, that we’ll take things slow and steady. That we won’t rush into this head first like bloodthirsty bulls,” You pleaded, looking up into his deep russet eyes that shone golden in the afternoon sun that pierced through the curtains.
Jeongguk’s face adopted a determined expression, one that you’ve never seen on him before. The way his eyes narrowed and brows furrowed made a smile tick at the corner of your lips. “I promise, we can take it as slow as you want. I would wait years for you Y/n.” He said, boring his eyes into your own. They were filled with passion and loyalty, something you saw in the wolf you used to take naps under the sun with. They spoke words that his lips couldn’t utter, that his throat couldn’t produce, trapping you in silent conversation.
“I’d wait for you through lifetimes, my love. No matter if it’s 6 years or 600, I’d wait for you through it all.”
“Through it all?”
“Yes. Through the pain, through the memories, through the laughs. I’ll be there to cheer you on, and I’ll lick your wounds when you fall.”
“Jeongguk, those are big promises to make.”
“But I mean every word, and I know I won’t regret them.”
“It’s hard to lay out my battered heart. It’s scary.”
“I know. You have scars, Y/n, both on your heart and on your skin. The one on your arm may be healed, but the one on your heart isn’t. Please, let me lick your wounds. Let me make it all better, let me show you love doesn’t have to be scary.”
“Just... be gentle,”
“I’ll always be gentle with you, love.”
The sun peeked its rays through the canopy of trees that covered the sky of the lush forest you lived in. Green leaves blowing in the light morning wind while the local songbirds started to wake up and serenade the rest of the fauna. Their repetitive song now an alarm clock, reminding you that it was time to start the day. The sun wrapped the forest in a blanket of warmth, like the embrace of a new mother. The perfect day for sitting outside and reading a book.
But you didn’t want to get out of bed.
Not quite yet.
“You’re insufferable,” You said, pinching Guk’s arms as he wrestled you in the bed, kicking up the sheets as he tried to grab and tickle you. “Mmm I know~” He smiled, rolling you over as he straddled your waist, placing both of his hands beside your head. He leaned down to nuzzle his face in the crook of your neck, placing tiny chaste kisses over your skin as you tried to hold back the giggles that bubbled up in your throat from his tousled hair that was ticking your face.
Jeongguk looked like an angel wrapped in the white sheets of your bed. His tan, shirtless torso contrasted beautifully, drawing your attention to him and only him. You ran your hand down his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist and pulling him down so he rested comfortably on top of you. He complied easily, happy to cuddle you, skin on skin.
Guk gave you another kiss on your cheek before he spoke up in a deep, sleepy voice. “What do you want to do today?” He asked. You shrugged, “I don’t know,” Guk snickered, slightly leaning up, so he was resting on his forearm on the bed. “You don’t know? Today's our 2 year anniversary, lovely. We have to do something,” He said.
“Maybe you can take me to that flower field Tae was gushing about? The one that he took Jimin to on their anniversary.” You suggested, mindlessly playing with the blanket that you were wrapped in. “Sounds like a plan. We could take back bouquets for the pack.” He smiled. “They miss you, ya know. They may not be your mates, but they connected with you when you were staying with us.”
“I know, I miss them too.”
“Well, look at you getting up and walking around!” Seokjin said as you descended the bifurcated stairs that Jeongguk’s pack, which was referred to as Bangtan, had in their house. You looked up at him and smiled, taking his outstretched hand as he helped you down the rest of the stairs. “I’m getting better,” You boasted proudly to the taller man, who treated you like a mother would treat a child.
Suddenly you heard the patter of tiny feet running over to where you stood and soon a tiny body plastered themselves to your legs. You wobbled slightly, but Seokjin was quick to catch you and stabilize you before you fell. “Yumi be careful! We don’t just grab people,” Seokjin chided the young girl, but you were quick to step in. “It’s fine, Jin. I’m always happy to see Yumi,”
Yumi looked up at you with big eyes. You could see her father in her. She got Yoongi’s eyes and pretty skin; she was also quiet like her father and would rather show than tell. “Hello little Yumi,” You waved. She nodded her head back as a hello before she took your hand and gently guided you towards the living room. You followed without complaint as Seokjin watched with a smile.
She led you over to the couch and sat you down next to a sleeping Yoongi, who you weren’t worried about waking since he slept like a rock. She held her hand out in a “wait here” motion before she padded off into another room and emerged with Yume in her arms. Except Yume wasn’t how you left him before.
Yume was dressing in a pink fairy costume, an unimpressed look on his face. You held back your laughter as she carried the cat over to you and placed him down in front of you, waiting for your reaction. “Wow! Yume you look so magical. Did you make this Yumi?” You asked, ignoring the melting stare your cat was shooting at you. Yumi shook her head and pointed at the hallway. You turned your head to see a proud Hoseok, Jimin, and Seokjin’s son, Yejun, standing there. You thought they must be the ones responsible.
Especially since they were dressed in costumes as well.
“Ah, you all look amazing. I’m guessing you want me to join?”
Yumi nodded yes.
You remember thinking that the rest of the pack were scary, formidable foes that would attack you when you slept the first couple of days you stayed at the pack house, but over the months once you actually got to meet the pack entirely, you realised that they wouldn’t hurt anybody unless they had to, and let’s be honest, you are not much of a threat.
“You should come visit soon, or, ya know, just move in,” Guk teased, and you pinched his arm again. “I would, but all my equipment is here. All my “magic witchy stuff” as you like to call it, and there isn’t a spare room in the pack house for it, you know this,” You sighed, sinking deeper into the sheets. Guk noticed your change in mood immediately and dropped the topic altogether, knowing that the topic often made you sad.
But he made a mental note to talk to Seokjin about expanding the house.
Guk pulled you closer to him and gently rubbed the nape of your neck, looking down at you with a soothing smile. “Hey, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it,” He said, and he kissed the top of your head. You rested your head in his chest as he moved his hand down towards your thigh, lifting up your leg so it was over his waist and you were wrapped around him further. “Remember the first time we snuggled? Two years ago you would’ve killed me for even kissing your pretty face.” He chuckled.
You rolled your eyes. “I would not have. Jinnie would’ve killed you because I would have told on you.” You snickered. Guk’s chest bounced as he laughed along with you. “You’re right, but now I get to hold you all the time,” He hummed, giving your thigh a squeeze and pulling you closer even though you were as close as you could possibly be.
Crickets
That’s all that could be heard in the deafening silence of the night. Crickets.
You laid down on the bed with your back to the man who rested next to you, trying your best to lull yourself to sleep, but nothing was working. Counting sheep, making up stories, thinking of something boring, nothing was working.
Four months, that’s how long you’ve been here at the Bangtan pack house, four months. When you first found out that you would be having to stay here for a bit, you thought it would be a week or two. Not four months.
The pain that was caused by the severed link didn’t go away immediately, and it definitely didn’t help your recovery. You strained multiple muscles in your legs and lower back and even had a few hairline fractures on your feet and ankles. You would be healing fine, but there was still a strain on your body, and it got worse the longer you were away from Jeongguk.
Needless to say, the two of you were spending a lot of time together.
“Are you awake?” Jeongguk was the first one to break the silence. You let a second pass before you hummed in acknowledgement. “Ah... Me too,” He said. It was awkward. Very awkward. Another beat of silence passed before he spoke up again. “I can’t sleep,” He whispered. “I can’t sleep either,” You responded. You heard Jeongguk shift and turn, and you were sure he was now looking at you.
He coughed. “I um, I heard that snuggling could be... Soothing,” He said. This time it was your turn to shift around to you were looking the werewolf in the eye. “Oh really?” You said. He grinned back. “Yes, maybe we should try it,” He suggested, but quickly back tracked once he realized what he said. “I-I mean if you want to. You don’t have to, you can just ignore me.”
You debated it in your tired mind for a second before you scooted closer and wrapped yourself around Jeongguk’s arm. You heard his breath stutter as he stiffened, but slowly calmed down after a minute and laid his head on top of yours. He smelt like petrichor. “This is nice,” You commented, nuzzling your face into his bicep.
“Yeah... This is nice,”
Guk rubbed your back with his hand gently. “You’ve come a long way. I’m proud, you know. I’m proud of how much you’ve healed,” Guk whispered to you. “Mm, I’m proud of me too,” You snickered, and Guk pinched your thigh. You yelped, jolting your leg and accidentally hitting his lower back. Guk let out an ‘oomph’ sound before you looked up with a flat expression and deadpanned, “What goes around comes around,”
Guk gasped in mock offense, but a smile quickly overtook his features. “You’re so mean,” He giggled, and you laughed along with him before someone interrupted your giggle fest. Meow! Yume yelled from his cat tower in the corner, yawning and stretching. Your ruckus must’ve woken him up. “Sorry Yume!” You called, snuggling back into the bed. “What did he say?” Guk asked. “Yume is just being a grump.”
Funny enough, Guk only figured out that you could actually understand Yume a month ago. He admitted that he thought you just knew his mannerisms well and was able to accurately guess what he was saying. But no, once he found out Yume could sort of “talk” he asks for a translation all the time.
Meow!
The two of you chuckled at Yume’s annoyed tone, finally settling down enough to enjoy the lazy early morning sunshine that shone through the windows. Guk sighed dreamily. “How’d I get so lucky to have you as a mate?” Guk whispered into the crown of your head, mindlessly rubbing his hand over your thigh. “I could say the same for you,” You whispered back, placing a kiss on his chest.
“I really meant it when I said I was proud of you. I know I say it a lot, but really, you’ve really come a long way. I look back at those days where I could’ve sworn you hated me and they contrast so harshly compared to our days of sleepy mornings and afternoon fun,” He said, and you pulled back slightly to look up at his now golden yellow eyes. You face softened, and you lifted one of your hands to gently cup his face. “I had some help, someone to lick my wounds. Someone to show me that trusting and loving doesn’t have to be scary.” You smiled, leaning up to place a kiss on Guk’s waiting lips.
It was still as magical as the first time.
“It’s pretty, isn’t it? Namjoon hyung takes pride in his garden, it’s like walking into another world,” Guk said as he guided you through the pack garden that was complete with different types of flowers in all different shades. Hedge bushes lined the boarders while peonies lines the paths you were walking. Moonlight shone through the overhanging branches of the forest’s trees, lighting your way.
You looked down at your hand that was intertwined with Guk’s as he walked in front of you. You never expected to get this far. When Guk promised to help you, that he’d wait for you until you were ready, you wanted to believe it. You wanted to believe that his words weren’t empty, but at the time, you thought that it would take a week, and then you’d be alone again. You were sure that he would’ve gotten tired of you by now.
But he didn’t.
No matter how many times you shut yourself off or bottled up your insecurities until they overflowed in the form of tears. He did as he promised. He stayed. You used to think it was strictly because of the pain, because even if he tried to hide it, he would get frustrated with you. His face would scrunch up and his voice had a slight edge. But you soon realized that the pain didn’t matter.
After five months it was gone. He just wanted to show you that he’d never leave you for some stupid little things like absurd accusations or arguments. That hateful, empty words couldn’t compare to his love for you. Those things didn’t matter, because in the end you’d apologize with eyes full of regret and he knew that you were trying your hardest to be better.
He could see the progress.
It took you a month to allow Guk to hold your hand, something he absolutely rejoiced over in private and you did too because, well, it was all you. Guk never pushed you past your comfort zone, he’d always let you decide when you wanted to initiate affection. After several months, you initiated to first hug, cuddle sesion, etc. The only thing left was the first kiss.
“Here we are!” Guk announced as the two of you arrived at a torch lit gazebo that overlooked a small pond full of lily pads and lotuses. The gazebo had a small table that had a tea set resting on top of it, and cushions scattered about. Guk helped you up the stairs, still worried about your injured legs even if they were mostly fine by now, and sat the two of you down at the table. He reached behind him to grab a blanket and wrapped you in it, making sure it was nice and secure before he looked at your face, a look of anticipation on his own.
“Well, what do you think?” He asked, a blinding, bunny-toothed smile on his face. “It’s lovely,” You said, taking his hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze. “What’s the special occasion?” You wondered. Guk shrugged. “Does there need to be one? I just wanted to do something nice for you.” He chuckled, reaching out to pour the two of you a cup of tea.
You took the cup from him once he offered and took a sip, letting out a hum at the delicious bitter taste of the black tea. “Thank you... I really do like it. The garden is beautiful,” You said, leaning your head to rest it on Guk’s shoulder. The action was a normal one now, so unlike the first few times, Guk didn’t flinch. He just savored the moment like any other time. “Not as beautiful as you,” He said, and you could hear the grin in his voice.
You playfully rolled your eyes. “You’re insufferable,” You chuckled, looking up at his cute bunny smile. “I know,” He whispered, a look of fondness in his eyes as he looked down at you. “Yet here you are,” You knew you felt things for Guk, that wasn’t even a question, but you never focused on them because every one around you was more concerned about your physical and mental health.
But recently, you were allowing yourself to reflect upon them and ask yourself “Are you ready?” Are you ready to officially seal this deal and say “I’m ready to commit to the relationship”? Are you ready to love and allow yourself to be loved?
Sure, the two of you have been in this limbo of being in a relationship and just testing the waters. Hand holding and cuddles were you dipping your toes and swimming in the shallow end of the pool. But the two of you never did anything beyond that. No kisses, no exploring touches, no vocal declarations of love. It was all light and innocent. But are you ready to swim into the deep end?
He said that he’d wait lifetimes for you. Through life and death he’d be by your side, ready to help in any way possible. “Are you okay? Do I need to get Jin?” He would whisper to you when you ached through the night. “It’s okay, don’t cry. I know you didn’t mean it.” He’d reassure you whenever you came crying to him after a fight. “I don’t expect you to wake up one day and be 100%, it’s okay to take your time, my love. Healing takes time,” He’d say.
Before you didn’t quite have the answer, but now looking at Guk’s pretty brown eyes and plump lips under the light of the moon, your heart made a decision before your brain could, and you leaned in.
Guk tasted like rushing freshwater rivers and violet tea, and you were dying of thirst. He kissed you like he had all the time in the world, like the two of you could live thousands of years and still have love to spare. Your lips danced in a smooth, blues rhythm, twirling around and holding each other close. They never truly parted, even when you needed to pull away to breathe, Guk would chase the warmth of your lips like a man stranded in the cold.
“I love you,” He whispered against your lips, pecking them over and over again, making sure every nook had a share of his love. You smiled, leaning in to connect your lips in another deep kiss. Kissing Guk felt like sinking into a hot spring. Warmth and a sense of safety engulfed your entire being whilst silent promises of undying loyalty were painted against your lips. Your heart melted like snow at the first signs of spring as your body felt light, like you were suspended in the air.
You sighed in delight as Guk ran his hand over your thigh, lightly drawing patterns over your skin as he hiked his hand higher until he was cupping your face and parting your lips far enough so he could properly look down at your love drunk state. “You’re so beautiful,” He gushed, and you quietly chuckled. “And you’re handsome,” You said back.
I just wanted to give a quick check-in on Sit and Heal. It’s coming, I promise, don’t worry! There were some things that happened this month that I was not anticipating, but hopefully that’s all over with so I can turn my complete focus on it. It’s also longer than I anticipated, so proofreading/editing is also taking a bit longer... I’ll get it done though! Don’t worry :)
Warnings: Um, Hoseok cries but they’re happy tears, like very brief mentions of kids without parents.
Word Count: 4.3k
Note: Oh no.. Writing this made me sad :( It’s really over? (I don’t know why I’m asking that... I’m the author...)
Summary: Years after a relationship goes south. You are the single mother of a beautiful 6-year-old golden retriever hybrid who you named Yunho. He is the light of your life. Yunho is everything to you, and you’d do anything for him. But you’re a human. Yunho doesn’t care, he will tell you he doesn’t. “You’re still my Eomma. No matter what.” He says. But you can’t help but feel like you will never be enough for him. You can’t be the mother he deserves. You can’t show him the ropes of being a hybrid, and you can’t teach him things the other moms can. But you try. You try your damn hardest. So, when a handsome German Shepard hybrid comes into your life, helping you and guiding Yunho in a way you can’t, you can’t help the cozy home he sets up in your heart.
Chapter Guide:
Previous / The End ❁
Masterlist
I’m not a morning person.
Never have been.
I used to dread the signs of a new day. I used to go to bed and groan at the thought of the sun peering through my curtains and calling me back to the real world. I’d curse the morning birds and their repetitive song and roll my eyes at the overly cheerful morning news host, who obviously sported a fake smile every time she was on air.
The only reason I used to wake up was for Yunho.
When my alarm went off, my first thoughts were getting Yunho ready for the new day, so he didn’t have to hate it like I did. I’d wake him up, help him choose his outfit for the day, make his breakfast while he got dressed, and send him off to school. With a genuine smile. Even if I wasn’t a morning person, I’d be one for him.
But things are different now.
The sun peeked its soft, pale yellow rays through the sheer ivory curtains that covered the windows of our bedroom. The sun’s warmth laid over my face like the hand of a mother trying to rouse its child from sleep. I was familiar with the motion. Several birds sung their morning tune, perched up on bare branches as they serenaded the woods like they have been since the first time they peeped. It was winter, meaning the birds have migrated to warmer places, although Busan’s climate didn’t make it feel like such. Yes, it was cold, but it was no winter wonderland.
Despite the slight chill outside and the slightly cloudy skies, everything felt pleasantly warm. Like the house was on its own schedule, changing seasons whenever it deemed necessary. It felt like the perfect April spring day under the white sheets of our bed, wrapped in a pair of gentle, slightly tanned arms. My body cradled in the embrace of my shirtless lover.
“Ma! Hobi! Wake up!” A giggle voice called, followed by the patter of running feet. Hoseok and I grumbled, playfully ignoring the hybrid and snuggling deeper into the covers. We heard Yunho scoff as we held back our giggles, waiting for him to do what he always did. He indulged our silent expectations. Yunho jumped up on the bed, shaking the mattress and us as he hopped up and down, laughing.
I relented and peeked my eyes open. My heart softened when I saw Yunho’s smile (Which was missing a couple of teeth) “Well, good morning to you too,” I chuckled, moving to sit up. “No...” a gruff voice from beside me grumbled. Hoseok tightened his arms around my figure, trying to persuade me back down in bed so he could snuggle me more.
I smiled, petting his bed head as compensation for my utterly rude movement. He grumbled again, opting to just snuggle into my side. “Hobi!! Wake up!” Yunho whined, bounding over to the older hybrid, jumping on top of him and grabbing his face with his hands, which were comically smaller. Hoseok let out a little “oomph” sound before he let Yunho move his head around and poke at his cheeks.
Hoseok’s eyes were still closed, but the heart-shaped smile that graced his face gave off waves of happiness. “Okay, champ, I’m awake,” He chuckled, peeking his honey eyes open to look at Yunho. The ten-year-old cheered in victory, scrambling off Hoseok to sit in my lap. “Do you know what day it is?” He grinned, his missing front teeth on full display.
I hummed playfully, tapping my finger against my chin as Hoseok watched us with a smile from where he was laying next to me. “Hmm, well, today is a big day, am I right?” I teased. Yunho nodded vehemently. “A very big day,” Hoseok commented. “Could it be... Your big day?” I asked. Yunho giggled. “Yes!” He exclaimed, wrapping me in a hug and nuzzling his face in the crook of my neck. I wrapped my unoccupied arm around him, giving him a kiss on the top of his head.
“Why don’t you get dressed and I’ll make your favorite breakfast?” I offered. Yunho pulled back and looked at me with stars in his eyes before chirping out an “okay!” before he squeezed me one last time, bent down and gave Hoseok a hug, and scurried out of the room. The two of us watched him go with warm, melted hearts. “He gets cuter as the years go by,” I sighed. “Wait until he’s a teenager,” Hoseok poked. I looked down at his teasing smile with a pout. “Don’t say that!” I whined, doing my best to wiggle out of his grasp.
Hoseok didn’t let go, he just held me tighter while he cackled at my attempts. “You’re mean,” I chuckled, pushing his face away from my side. Hoseok playfully nipped at my hands with his sharp canines, fighting them off like his life depended on it. All with a smile on his face. “But you love me,” He gushed, nuzzling his face into my stomach once he won the fight against my hands.
I rolled my eyes, giving him one last scratch behind the ear before I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up. Hoseok whined, but let me go. “Come on, you menace. Put a shirt on and help me with breakfast.” I said, throwing on one of his sweatshirts and making my way downstairs. I heard him dramatically groan.
I made my way to the kitchen and got out the ingredients for blueberry pancakes, Yunho’s favorite. Today was January 14, Yunho’s 10th birthday. He’s been eagerly waiting for this day since December, constantly dropping hints of what he wanted and what he’d like to do. So for today, Hoseok and I planned to take him out to a new amusement park with Hyejin, Yoongi, and Hajun (a different from the one we frequented), go out for dinner, and come back home for ice cream. (and presents of course)
“Hobi!!” I heard Yunho call from upstairs and the aforementioned man responded with a “Yes?” before I heard his footsteps trail through the upstairs hallway. When Yunho was about 7, he started calling Hoseok “Hobi” instead of “Mr. Hoseok” once he realized that Hoseok was sticking around for a bit. I think it was because Yunho fully accepted him into his life, but Hoseok argues that “Mr. Hoseok” was just too much of a mouthful.
“Eomma... Where’s Hobi?” Yunho mumbled one morning while I fiddled with the coffee machine. I looked down at him with a quirked brow. “Hobi?” I asked, and he nodded. “Yeah, Mr. Hoseok. Where is he? Did he leave?” He pouted. I gave him a reassuring smile as I picked him up and sat him down on the counter.
“Hobi went out to get some breakfast, don’t worry, he’ll be back,” I said, petting his head. Yunho leaned into the touch, looking up at me with his puppy eyes. “Promise? Promise he’ll come back?” He asked, sticking out one of his pinkies. I chuckled, grabbing his pinky with my own. “I promise. Hobi wouldn’t leave us, bub,”
Right on cue, the front door opened. Yunho’s ears stood at attention, and he quickly jumped off the counter. He ran over the Hoseok who had a box of donuts in his hands and latched onto his leg, nuzzling his face into the material of his jeans. “Hey, champ. Are you okay?” He asked, moving the box over to one hand and resting his newly unoccupied one on Yunho’s head. “Don’t leave like that!” He whined. Hoseok frowned, bending down so he could look at Yunho properly.
“I just went out to get donuts, bub,” He explained, opening the box in front of him. “I got your favorite,” He smiled, motioning for Yunho to take one. Yunho complied, picking up a regular glazed donut and taking a bite out of it. “Did Hoseok scare you because he wasn’t here when you woke up?” I asked, leaning against the wall. Yunho nodded with a slumped head.
Hoseok looked at me with sad eyes before he turned his attention back to Yunho. “I’m sorry, I’ll tell you next time, okay? And if I’m ever not here when you wake up, know that I’ll always come back.” He smiled. Yunho looked up at him. “Do you promise, Hobi?” He asked. I could tell the new name caught Hoseok off guard, but he shook it off, holding out his pinky for Yunho. “I promise.”
And he’s been calling him that for three years now.
Suddenly, Hoseok came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his head on top of mine while I mixed the pancake batter. “What was up?” I asked. “His adult canines are sore again, so I gave him some medicine,” He explained. I sighed, “Hopefully they’ll settle soon, and correctly.” Hoseok moved his head to rest over my shoulder and reached over to pop a blueberry in his mouth before saying, “It’ll be okay. I remember when mine started growing in, I cried until they settled. He’s already stronger than me,” He chuckled, giving me a kiss on the cheek before he pulled away.
Not long after, Yunho came running down the stairs, bouncing over to where Hoseok was leaning against the counter and plastering himself to his leg. Hoseok smiled down at him and ruffled his hair. “How are you feeling?” He asked. Yunho shrugged, “Okay,” He answered. “Do you think you’ll be able to eat?” I asked before actually cooking any of the pancakes. “Mhm! I can eat,” He reassured. I chuckled, “Roger that,” Hoseok and Yunho both gave me a kiss before they moved into the living room to watch cartoons.
I never thought I’d be a morning person, but damn, waking up next to Hoseok really changed that.
Since that day at Geumjeongsan, Hoseok and I took things slow and steady. Nothing changed at first. Hoseok would come by for ice cream nights like he always did, but then he’d stay after I put Yunho to bed. Then he took me on dates. Then he’d stay over for a couple of days. Then I asked him to move in with me. And now here we are, about 4 years later, with a new Jung Hoseok added to Yunho and I’s little family.
My bed never felt cold anymore, nights weren’t lonely or silent, and I looked forward to the morning. The mornings where I could peak my eyes open and see Hoseok’s sleeping face right in front of me, his hair all tousled. The mornings where I could wake up and hear his laughter mixed in with Yunho’s downstairs. The mornings when I was roused from sleep with a gentle, “Wake up, baby,” or “Honey~ wakey wakey~”
I’ve never been a morning person.
But Hoseok and Yunho made me one.
The joyous screams of amusement park visitors echoed through the chilly air. The grind of rollercoasters tracks and other thrill rides hummed in a familiar rhythm. The smell of popcorn and cotton candy wafted past our noses as we entered the gates of the amusement park, keeping an eye out for a certain cat family.
“If it isn’t my favorite sister! Ready for some amusement park fun?”
“Hyejin, you’re an only child. You basically adopted me in college to fill the little sister role. And yes, of course.”
Hyejin cackled as she ran up and wrapped me in a hug, while Hoseok excitedly greeted Yoongi, his best friend, with a hug of his own. Yoongi grumbled, but I could tell liked it by the way his noir tail swished back and forth. Yunho ran over to give them a hug as well, a blinding smile plastered on his face.
Hyejin pulled away and greeted him enthusiastically, picking him up and spinning him around. Yunho squealed in delight, their giggles intermixed with each other. Once Hyejin let him down, Yunho gave her a proper hug before bouncing over to Yoongi to give him one, too. “Oh god, you're getting big,” Yoongi commented, sounding exactly like an old man. “You’re going to be taller than your mother when you 're an adult,” He snickered, and I whacked his shoulder in defense. He let out an “ow” but continued to laugh.
“You know, that means he’d be taller than you too, Yoon,” Hoseok said, and Yoongi immediately cut off his chuckles to give the taller hybrid a shoulder whack of his own. I watched the interaction with a satisfied grin before I felt a tug on my shirt. I looked down to see Hajun looking up at me, silently asking for a hug. “Well, isn’t it my favorite nephew,” I said, kneeling down to wrap Hajun in my arms. He wrapped his arms around me in return, quietly nuzzling his face in my chest.
After we all exchanged our greetings and went over the rules with the kids, Hyejin clapped her hands together with a smile. “Alright! Let the adventure begin!” She exclaimed. Hajun and Yunho cheered with her as we started walking through the park. Yunho grabbed onto Hoseok’s hand while Hajun took Yoongi’s and the two of them pulled the grown men every which way. Hyejin and I lagged a bit behind, lost in our own conversation.
We walked through the food stands and carnival games, collecting drinks and a couple stuffed animals that Yunho and Hajun guilt tripped Hoseok and Yoongi into winning for them. “Look Hobi! It looks like the dragon from my show!” Yunho grinned, pointing up the red dragon plushie that was one of the prizes for winning the “Throw the ball and knock down the bottles” game.
Hoseok looked at what he was pointing at and nodded in agreement. “Do you want it?” He asked and Yunho quickly nodded his head yes. “Now, now, I think you’ve won enough for right now,” I said. Yunho pouted, about to whine out a “But Ma...” before Hoseok beat him to it. “It’s fine, baby, just one more? Then we’ll stop,”
I sighed, relenting pretty quickly under Hoseok’s persuasive smile. He and Yunho cheered, going over to give the stall employee his money. The employee gave Hoseok three balls and pointed at the stack he’d be aiming at. Hoseok gave one of the balls to Yunho and asked him to take a shot at it. Yunho stuck his tongue out in concentration and threw the ball. It completely missed, but Hoseok was quick to turn his pout into a smile when he threw one of the other balls, successfully knocking down some of the bottles.
Now, a man throwing a worn out baseball should not be attractive. But it was. It was attractive. I knew Hoseok went to the gym whenever he could with his friend Jeongguk, and it obviously paid off. He was fit, and his flexing biceps only proved that fact further.
Hoseok threw the second ball and knocked down the rest of the bottles, winning the dragon for Yunho. Hoseok handed the toy to Yunho, but before Yunho took it completely, he rubbed it all over Hoseok, getting his scent on the toy. Hoseok let him with a smile on his face. Once he deemed it scented enough, he hugged it to his chest and grabbed Hoseok’s land, running back to where I was standing.
“Look Ma!” He said, proudly showing the stuffed toy to me. “Wow!” I gasped in that typical “impressed mother” way before I shot Hoseok a grateful smile. “What do we say?” I asked. Yunho turned around and hugged Hoseok’s leg, “Thank you, Hobi,” He said in a singsong voice. Hoseok chuckled. “You’re welcome,”
We continued on our journey through the park, occasionally stopping to get on rides like the teacups and the merry-go-round. I made sure to take plenty of pictures of Yunho’s bright face and Hoseok’s heart-shaped smile. (And occasional face of fear when the rides suddenly sped up)
“Ma! Can we go on that one?” Yunho asked, pointing at one of the rollercoasters. It was quite tame, nothing crazy, just fast paced and a couple of small drops. I looked at it, feeling my stomach go a bit queasy. I was never the best with rollercoasters. “Go with Seok and see if you reach the height limit,” I said. Yunho grabbed Hoseok’s hand and shook with excitement as he led him to where the height limit board was set up. Hajun also pulled Yoongi over.
Hyejin giggled. “They look absolutely adorable, don’t they?” She asked. “Who? Yoongi and Hajun? Yes, Yoongi and mini Yoongi are the cutest,” I chuckled, but Hyejin shook her head. “No, silly, Hoseok and Yunho,” she clarified, and I let out an ‘ohhh’ before I nodded my head in agreement. “Yes, they are also the cutest.” I smiled, watching as Yunho bounced up and down in excitement when Hoseok told him he reached the limit. The two of them looked over at me and I shot them a thumbs up, waving them off as they got in the queue.
“I’m proud of you, ya know,” Hyejin spoke up, turning to look at me. “Why’s that?” I asked. Hyejin playfully rolled her eyes because to her it was so obvious what she was alluding to. “The little family you’ve made with Hoseok,” She said, “You changed so much, and for the better. You’re literally glowing every day and so is Yunho. You don’t have that doubt anymore, and that feeling isn’t rubbing off on him anymore.”
“Really? I mean, I definitely feel better, but I didn’t know I was looking like it too.”
“I’m just happy to see you so happy.”
I smiled, looking back at where Hoseok, Yunho, Yoongi, and Hajun were standing. The four of them in their own little world as they talked about whatever. Probably music, which was what the boy’s new obsession was about. “My boys make me happy,” I said with a shrug.
“Have you ever thought about marriage?” Hyejin blurted out.
I choked on the water I was sipping, coughing it up as it made its way down the wrong pipe. Hyejin gently pat my back, like a gentle form of the Heimlich manoeuvre however the Heimlich wouldn’t help in this situation since water wasn’t a solid. “W-What?” I stuttered out, looking at Hyejin with wide eyes.
Hyejin took the fact that I wasn’t dying as an invitation to start laughing. I swatted at her with a pout. “Don’t laugh! You caught me off guard!” I whined, and Hyejin laughed harder. After she had calmed down, she took a deep breath and cleared her throat before looking at me again. “Have you ever thought of marriage? Like, marrying Hoseok?” She asked for the second time, but this time I didn’t choke. (Luckily)
“Um... No? I haven’t, isn’t thinking about this a bit too soon?” I argued. But Hyejin shook her head. “You’ve been together for like, 4 years. I don’t think it’s early at all,” She said, crossing her arms. “You’re saying you haven’t thought about it at all? Like never?” She questioned, and I shook my head. “Not at all. I just, live in the moment and appreciate the fact that Hoseok is with me in the first place,” I gushed.
“Do you want to though?” She rose a playful brow, nudging me softly. I spluttered, “I um. I don’t know...? Yes...? Marriage is expensive, though. The venue, the dress, the food-” I listed, but Hyejin quickly cut me off with a finger to my lips. “Gosh don’t think about that, think about if Hoseok were to get down on one knee and pull out a ring right now, would you say yes?” She asked. I chuckled, “Hyejin that’s-” “Nope! Answer the question!” She chirped.
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah... Yes, I’m sure I would,” I answered truthfully, feeling my ears heat up in embarrassment. Hyejin squealed, bouncing up and shaking me out of excitement. “Ah! So cute, I can’t wait for the wedding,” She gushed, wrapping her arms around me so I’d bounce up and down with her. “Hyejin! Stooopp” I whined, feeling the stares of passersby.
Hyejin pulled away once the excited cheers of rollercoaster-high Yunho and Hajun came bounding over to us. They cheerfully told us all about how Hoseok screamed and Yoongi closed his eyes the whole time. Hoseok walked over to me with a pout, clearly embarrassed about his lack of courage. He wrapped his arms around me and whined about how awful the rollercoaster was. But I could only blush as I thought about what Hyejin had talked to me about.
“Happy birthday, dear Yunho, happy birthday to you!”
“Is the cake good?” I asked Yunho who had a forkful of ice cream cake in his mouth. He nodded with a smile, his face scrunching up cutely. I chuckled, petting Yunho on the head before I started to clean up the mess we had made, which was mostly wrapping paper mess from Yunho’s gift unwrapping extravaganza.
As Hyejin and I went to put the dishes in the sink and throw the trash away, she spoke up with a pout. “We’ll have to get going... All three of us have things to do in the morning,” She sighed. “Why do you sound so guilty?” I chuckled, patting her on the back in reassurance. “Because it’s so early! And I wanna hang out with you longer,” He whined. “Hyejin, you see me like all the time. It’ll be okay. Why don’t we meet up for coffee on Wednesday?” I offered.
Hyejin immediately cheered up, enthusiastically agreeing to the plans and wrapping me in a hug. “I love you,” She said. “I love you too,” I responded. Yoongi came back in from where he and Hoseok had disappeared out back, keys in his hands as he looked over at Hyejin. “Ready?” He asked, and Hyejin nodded.
Yoongi told Hajun to say his goodbyes, which he did, albeit reluctantly, as Hyejin and Yoongi said their own. “Take care,” Yoongi whispered to me, and he gave me a shoulder hug. “You say that like you 're going away for a long time,” I said. Yoongi just shrugged, “I’m not, but still, take care.” I smiled at him. “Will do and I love you too,” Yoongi looked away with a blush, running off to hide behind Hyejin.
“Bye!” We all waved as we watched them go from the front door. The Min family reciprocated with their own set of waves and chorus of “Bye”s. Having guests leave after a party aways feels so odd. I never realized just how quiet the house was at night.
“Okay! Time for bed,” Yunho chirped, padding over towards the stairs. Hoseok and I raised our brow, looking back and forth between each other and Yunho with wide eyes. That was abrupt... “You don’t want to stay up? This is the only day I let you,” I said, utterly confused. Yunho turned around and shook his head no. “Nope!” He said, popping the ‘p’ “I have school tomorrow,” He said.
“Alright, since when do you want to be ready for school?” Hoseok chuckled, tilting his head at the younger hybrid. “Tomorrow is Appa day, where we’re supposed to bring our Appa to school with us,” Yunho smiled, like what he was saying was nonchalant. I cringed. I never really like the concept of “Eomma days” or “Appa days” because, like Yunho, not everyone had an Appa or Eomma. It just seemed harmful, in a way.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay home tomorrow?” I asked, but Yunho vehemently shook his head no. “Then Hobi and I would miss Appa day!” He whined. Now if Yunho surprised us with his enthusiasm for school, he rendered Hoseok and I... Well, speechless.
Hoseok coughed, taking a minute to process the meaning of Yunho’s words. “Is that okay...?” Yunho cautioned after seeing Hoseok’s reaction. “Yes! Yes. It’s perfectly okay. We can, um, we can get donuts for breakfast, yeah?” He sputtered out. Yunho’s face lit up. “Okay! I’m going to go take a shower,” He proclaimed before he ran up the stairs towards the bathroom.
Silence.
There was nothing in the air but silence between Hoseok and I.
Until Hoseok’s soft sniffles reached my ears.
I made my way over to Hoseok and cupped his teary face in my hands. “Hey... Why are you crying?” I asked with a worried look. Hoseok didn’t answer at first, and I gave him the space to calm down and gather himself. “He-He wants me for Appa day, so does that mean...?” He sniffled, looking at me with pleading eyes that silently asked me if this was real and not a dream. I nodded. “I think it does,”
Hoseok cried even harder, burying his face into the crook of my neck and wrapping his arms around me, holding me tight. “He sees me like that?” He cried. I didn’t realize just how seriously Hoseok took his role as a father figure, and I guess the conformation from Yunho that he was, in fact, his father figure made him feel like he had won the World Cup. “He does. You deserve that honor, Hoseok,”
“I just... I don’t... Appa”
“Shh, take a deep breath, okay?”
I let him cry in my neck until he pulled away by himself, leaving me with a saturated collar and sleeve. Hoseok looked at the wet spot and chuckled. “Sorry,” He croaked out, but I shook my head and took one of his hands in my. “No need to apologize, it’s just a shirt. Let’s get ready for bed, okay? You have a big day tomorrow.” I smiled.
Yunho was my light.
And now he has a father could be things that I couldn’t.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Just Yunho, Hoseok, and I
“What’s stopping you, Seok?”
“I’m just nervous, Yoon. What if she says no?”
“Why would she say no?”
“I don’t... Know...”
“Exactly, so just take her somewhere nice and ask. That’s how I asked Hyejin,”
“You make it sound so easy... But alright... I’ll do it.”
I freaking forgot to add the “Keep reading” cut to OLINO Chapter 14, and I was scrolling through my feed like “Who is this and why don’t they cut it, ah this is so annoying” and then I realize it’s actually ME and I’M the dumb one. I need to go to bed...
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