closure.

[smartyyy-deactivated20220828]

[richardsiken]

“Eventually something you love is going to be taken away. And then you will fall to the floor crying. And then, however much later, it is finally happening to you: you’re falling to the floor crying thinking, “I am falling to the floor crying,” but there’s an element of the ridiculous to it — you knew it would happen and, even worse, while you’re on the floor crying you look at the place where the wall meets the floor and you realize you didn’t paint it very well.” — Richard Siken

[murdershawty]

fake fucking smile with a knife in my back

[unsmokable-deactivated20171026]

[re-place-ablee]

Still got love for some people I know I’ll never talk to again.

[naturaekos]

“❝I can write the saddest poem of all tonight. I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.”

— Pablo Neruda (via naturaekos)

[oshitwaddupsadboihere]

maiko

[naturaekos]

“❝I can write the saddest poem of all tonight. I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.”

— Pablo Neruda (via naturaekos)

[oshitwaddupsadboihere]

maiko

[sky-lantern]

Feel

“That's what I do. I push things I love, I deeply feel for, away. I try to hit pause on everything and save the feeling for as long as I can. Cause I know, once I conquered them, I would lose my all interests in them. There will be emptiness all around me, inside me again. Even though it gives me pain, but that's what I want, to feel something; even if it is pain. But most of the time, I don't get to conquer them even if I want to. Cause world doesn't wait for me to decide. Decide; the hardest thing for me to do. Most of the time, everybody leaves. But that's okay, because then all that stays with me are regrets. And I try to feel those regrets for as long as I can. Giving myself pain, shedding the tears that I don't know what I am saving for. But at one point, they also fade away. But until then, I find something new to love, to feel for.

Everyone thinks, I'm an attention seeking heartless creature. Well, they are right in some way. I probably am heartless. That's probably why I try to hold onto everything I feel a connection with. To feel... just simply feel. I probably just try to bring back the heart that I don't know where's left broken in million pieces. Knowing me, it's probably me who wrecked it.

The things I do to feel! Reading thousands of quotes, saving them to read when my mind, my entire being is exhausted. Reading random books, listening to the saddest music. At random times, standing in front of a mirror, screaming, "You're worthless. You're worthless." But that's not true. I know that's not true. Why would I feel for a lie that a part of me is telling me? Sometimes, when random thoughts, random stories that I make inside my head keeps me awake, I think about what will happen if I die. I make a list of people who will cry for me. I imagine how long will it take for them to carry their life on. It probably won't take long. Cause again, world doesn't stop for anybody. But I cried thinking about it enough times, that it doesn't do anything beside making the emptiness deeper. I think of my dead pets, but that also doesn't work anymore. I look around, sweat all over my face, gasping for air, searching desperately for something that will make me feel, make me cry out the emptiness. Most of the time, I find nothing but darkness. I fall asleep at one point. Next day I forget about everything and carry my day on.

Again, world doesn't wait for anybody.

Oh, how much I wish it did! How much I wish it waited for me to gather myself together and carry on pacing with it like everybody, not having the time to think like I do now. How much I wish it didn't leave me behind drowning in an ocean of emptiness. How much I wish it came to me, picking up my fragile form carefully and whisper in my ear, "I understand."

But hey, we're talking about reality here. The same old cruel, ugly reality. Something that I find so much similarity with myself. But somehow, in between all of these, I still love reality aka life. When I'm in pain, shedding tears, or just feeling empty as always, waiting for whatever it is to end, a part of me still whispers, "Oh, how much I love life!" I still hate fairy tales, happy endings with a burning passion cause they aren't tied to reality enough.

But I'm not sure until when this love will be there. Knowing me, at one point it'll fade away too. I don't know what I'll do then. I don't know if I'll fade away with it too. Maybe I faded away long ago, when the reality punched me in the face with the cruelest fact that nobody will ever understand me, not even myself. Maybe most of me faded away back then. Maybe, the only part of me that hasn't faded away yet is the part that loves life.

I don't want to think about the time it also won't be here.”

—Late night thoughts

[vanish]

[oshitwaddupsadboihere]

Swear to God I’m so tired of everything...

I can see the end getting closer.

[musingofapoeticsoul]

[thewallsofconcrete]

RARE HISTORIC PHOTOS WE MIGHT HAVEN’T YET SEEN

An Exotic Dancer Demonstrates That Her Underwear Was Too Large To Have Exposed Herself, After Undercover Police Officers Arrested Her In Florida

Dorothy Counts – The First Black Girl To Attend An All-White School In The United States – Being Teased And Taunted By Her White Male Peers At Charlotte’s Harry Harding High School, 1957

Austrian Boy Receives New Shoes During WWII

Jewish Prisoners After Being Liberated From A Death Train, 1945

The Graves Of A Catholic Woman And Her Protestant Husband, Holland, 1888

A Lone Man Refusing To Do The Nazi Salute, 1936

Job Hunting In 1930’s

German Soldiers React To Footage Of Concentration Camps, 1945

Residents Of West Berlin Show Children To Their Grandparents Who Reside On The Eastern Side, 1961

Acrobats Balance On Top Of The Empire State Building, 1934

Mafia Boss Joe Masseria Lays Dead On A Brooklyn Restaurant Floor Holding The Ace Of Spades, 1931

Lesbian Couple At Le Monocle, Paris, 1932

The Most Beautiful Suicide – Evelyn Mchale Leapt To Her Death From The Empire State Building, 1947

The Remains Of The Astronaut Vladimir Komarov, A Man Who Fell From Space, 1967

Race Organizers Attempt To Stop Kathrine Switzer From Competing In The Boston Marathon. She Became The First Woman To Finish The Race, 1967

Harold Whittles Hearing Sound For The First Time, 1974

Nikola Tesla Sitting In His Laboratory With His “Magnifying Transmitter” more

[jonesywrites-deactivated2025050]

Wow

[matchagirl]

[fermentedpiss2]

this is the cow of death. reblog to die.

[stoycci]

Има още такива хора

[my-dark-soul-13]

Рядко допускаш нещо да чувстваш.

И когато допуснеш, разбираш защо го правиш рядко.

[stoycci]

Поне…

[handcrafted-in-germany]

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

[throughadreamerseyes]

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

03: Do you regret anything?

04: Are you insecure?

05: What is your relationship status?

06: How do you want to die?

07: What did you last eat?

08: Played any sports?

09: Do you bite your nails?

10: When was your last physical fight?

11: Do you like someone?

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

14: Do you miss someone?

15: Have any pets?

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

18: Are you scared of spiders?

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

26: What are you craving right now?

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

30: What’s irritating you right now?

31: Does somebody love you?

32: What is your favourite color?

33: Do you have trust issues?

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

51: Favourite food?

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

54: Is cheating ever okay?

55: Are you mean?

56: How many people have you fist fought?

57: Do you believe in true love?

58: Favourite weather?

59: Do you like the snow?

60: Do you wanna get married?

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

62: What makes you happy?

63: Would you change your name?

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

IM READY

Pls I am bored