Silly prompt idea but, can you write Villain & Hero just relentlessly flirting with eachother and pinning n stuff while the sidekick and henchmen are just annoyed this happens everytime they are in battle.
Sidekick raised their weapon warily, eyeing Henchman. “What kind of day is this?”
The sky flashed overhead, lightning cracking across it, the rain still held back and ready to burst.
“I think we both know what that depends on,” Henchman replied, their own glaive poised to attack.
Sidekick nodded, and turned towards the other side of the room where Hero and Villain stood.
“You know,” Villain said, probably trying to be quiet but failing miserably, “I think I prefer your face with a little blood on it.”
“I prefer yours behind bars.”
Henchman raised their eyebrows at Sidekick, and dropped their glaive. “Damn it. It’s one of those nights.”
Hero stepped forward, not even bothering to get their sword into a good position. “Are you gonna come the easy way, or the hard way?”
Sidekick rolled their eyes, reaching into the popcorn bag Henchman held out.
Villain smirked. “Didn’t realize you were so forward, Hero, but I can think of some creative ways to-”
Henchman covered Sidekick’s ears. “This isn’t child appropriate.”
“I’m two months older. And be quiet, we’re missing it.”
Hero was blushing now, giving Villain one of those looks. “I think you’d be surprised, Villain. We’re more similar than you’d like to think-”
Villain cut them off with a laugh. “Don’t give me the “we’re more similar than you think” talk. I don’t need it, don’t want it. Not when you could be giving me other things.”
“I can’t give you anything until you change,” Hero said, voice starting to get desperate.
Henchman sighed. “and I thought this one would be good,” they muttered, and looked over at Sidekick. “Bet you one of them is against the wall in the next fifteen minutes.”
Sidekick didn’t look away from the conversation. “Weak. I say next three.”
Hero was closer to Villain now. “I know there’s still good-”
Villain had Hero against the wall.
Sidekick held out their hand. “Pay up.”
Henchman placed a single popcorn kernel in it.
Villain tutted. “Oh, Hero, you’re in way over your head with me. One of these days you need to accept that you can’t save everyone- and that includes me. You can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved.”
Sidekick leaned over. “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell Hero, but they never listen.”
“Villain’s worried about that too,” Henchman replied. “Won’t stop talking about how annoying Hero’s self-righteous self-loathing is.”
“...they kind of have a point.”
Hero freed themselves from Villain’s grip, now backing away from the wall. “I still have to try.”
Sidekick stood up. “Looks like it’s about time to go. Do you need help packing up the lawn chairs?”
Henchman stood up too. “No, I’ve got it. See you tomorrow?”
“Yep. Who knows, maybe tomorrow they’ll finally actually start talking about their crap.”
“You’d better run, Hero,” Villain said. “I can’t have you getting in my way again- I set up a little something to keep you busy for a while.”
“It’s a word puzzle,” Henchman whispered to Sidekick.
“Let me guess, the password is whatever big failure Hero most recently made.”
Henchman shrugged. “I mean you’re not far off.”
“Really? How is that suppose to help with their hero complex!?”
“It makes some really nice drama. And look, I already disabled the actual bomb. Just try to take a long time, okay?”
Sidekick gave an exaggerated sigh, but did a quick thumbs up. “Good to know. My lips are sealed!” They gave Henchman one last awkward goodbye wave, and ran off after Hero.
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