My friend is defective, can I get a refund?
My bestest friend for almost 10 years was like a sibling! We were always out on adventures. We basically lived together.
Then they went off to university and made new friends... it sucked being replaced little by little but she’d still make an effort to talk with me.
During the summer she’d move back home. We’d hang out as much as our work schedules allowed it. I had my best friend back.
September swings around again and she’s gone. Very minimal contact this time. I’d message her, I’d get a reply 2 days later. “Sorry I didn’t get a notification” was always her excuse. It never stopped her from answering her other friends when I’d drive up to visit her.
My jealousy kicked in. I made sure to not hate her new friends. It’s not their fault. But I was petty. Whenever she’d bail on plans I’d be right bitter. I tried talking to her about how I was feeling and she’d shrug it off...
I don’t even think she’s aware of some of the hurtful things she’s said to me. “I hate being home, I’d much rather be surrounded by my friends” like I’m so glad I’m your friend... at your home...
Third year of university. I end up in the same city she’s in school at! I never see her. I visited her in the hospital, I spent recovery time with her instead of doing homework. I’d do anything for her cause that’s who I am. But as soon as she’s all healed up, I’m forgotten about.
She’s dating now. I’m happy for her. I’m more replaced than ever before. She visits me more now though! But... it’s because he’s busy with school and she tells me “I’m only here because I can’t distract him” “he needs to study”... the moment he’s free, she’s gone.
Our adventures together have turned into me scrolling and seeing her adventures with him. Specifically exactly what we used to do.
She does the generic “I miss you we should hang out” and then bails when I make plans with her
I’ve been her back up when her other friends are busy. They hang out 24/7 and I get left behind.
Whenever she visits all she talks about is her lover and her new friends...
She complained about a friend who kept opening up to her about her problems and she said it was giving her panic attacks
I replied with “that’s why I keep it to myself with how much depression and self hate you put me through”
She said “that’s why we’re friends, you keep it to yourself”.............
I almost broke down crying in her car.
This isn’t what she was like, she’s changed, but who doesn’t? And once summer hits and she moves back home, she’ll be her old self again. Then the school year will swing around and a piece of me will die inside some more...
I’ve been plenty of people’s councillors and I would tell them “that’s a toxic friend, you need to drop them”
I don’t know what to do...
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