Pemberley'd, bitch.

amanda. oddly enough, this is not the Jane Austen blog you're looking for. welcome to the goblin market. open 5pm-9am.

[svetzzi]

go away forever with me

[kopytki]

drew fanart of the thang

[nyxfaei]

Imagine a fluffy unicorn that’s bred for its wool like a sheep- once or twice a year it has to get shorn and the shearer just has to awkwardly flop and position the unicorn around without getting stabbed. Perhaps they cover the horn with a protective pool noodle

[nyxfaei]

Do you see my vision???

[danataxit]

@wizardpotions

[gatheringbones]

I love your agreeable and amenable and flexible nature and how none of your wants and needs ever get priority and how nobody even knows what they are to begin with and how you never start or engage in conflicts and never express even mildly unsavory opinions and get along with everyone from every conceivable group, that’s so trustworthy. hey quick question. do you happen to have an enormous pressurized reservoir of rage and resentment you feel like you can’t ever analyze or express because that would break the rules for the kind of person you are and if so, do you think a lifetime of squashing it down might ever backfire?

[magpied-illustration]

[loud] shimp

[lovelyswampwitch]

Can we please, PLEASE talk about Sharon D. Clarke as Lady Bracknell? MY GOD WHAT A WOMAN. The commanding presence she emanated throughout the play. What a force of nature. She played a constantly disapproving auntie down to a pat! She will have none of this tomfoolery, thank you very much!

And when she threw it down at the curtain call, I was yelling, "YESSSS QUEEN! EAT THEM UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!" at my screen.

Oh, what a privilege to watch this. Now excuse me while I go watch this again for as long as it remains up on Youtube.

[sartorialadventure]

There were some really excellent costumes in this production!

[everyday-cutephoto]

[ailithnight]

This is a worm? Or perhaps some sort of slug?

[marlynnofmany]

And it's gonna getcha

[twicejoyhalfpain-deactivated202]

penultimate is such a good word. its like....maybe the second best word

[doctorslippery]

[official-linguistics-post]

official linguistics post

[foodffs]

No Bake Oreo Pie

Recipe: https://cakewhiz.com/no-bake-oreo-pie-recipe/

[owlshoes]

It's my 15 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

[skyinide]

[afronerdism]

This might be the funniest reply I’ve ever seen in my life

[thepioden]

[fozmeadows]

I AM WHEEZING

[skyinide]

PLEASE STOP REBLOGGING THIS OMFG

[wildspringday]

[heymacy]

HEATED RIVALRY SEASON ONE + hall of fame text posts

[fullcravings]

Easy Cannoli Pie

[sweetoothgirl]

London Fog Cake

[mrdarcysdadbod]

Okay i know i myself have made jokes on Mr Darcy hating to spend time with Mr. Collins but. I feel like of the two of them Darcy is probably significantly less annoyed than Lizzie by Collins simply bc 1) he never received The most obnoxious proposal in the world from him 2) the combination of Darcy's superior rank and his not being an Elegant Female puts him in a position to just tell Collins to stop talking and probably be thanked for the privilege. Darcy probably just lets him talk for five minutes and then is all "hm. I'd like to meditate on that in silence for a while. Very intriguing." And gets like an hour of peace

[mrdarcysdadbod]

Alternatively Lizzie is just openly blatantly rude to Collins and when he looks at Darcy like are you gonna control your wife?? Darcy just shrugs like. It's her house man I'm not the boss of her.

[hanna-writes]

Personal headcanon is that Darcy just keeps doing what he did the first time Collins approached him, aka suffers in silence for two minutes and then just turns around and leaves without a word, while Collins “feels that he has every reason to be pleased with their conversation”. Once Pemberley and Rosings are back on speaking terms, Lizzy discovers that she can do the same thing without Collins getting butthurt, bc she is after all the niece of Lady Catherine de Bourgh. Although tbh, Collins doesn’t bother Lizzy too much, bc even he finds it slightly embarrassing that he once told the future Mrs Darcy that she was never gonna get a better offer than himself. He probably ends up apologising to Mr Darcy for the presumption. “Your choice of wife is most fortuitous, and I would offer my humblest apologies that I once implied, or rather insinuated, that her marriage prospects were not … that she might not look forward to such elevation as she has now been granted in marrying such an esteemed personage as yourself.” Meanwhile Darcy is just standing there like “aPolOgIZe tO LiZZy, noT to mE”

[mrdarcysdadbod]

My own personal headcanons in addition to this are 1) that Collins finds Lizzie and Darcy's marriage DEEPLY suspicious and is bringing peak Weird Little Man energy to his attempts to investigate this mystery and find... Something. He doesn't know what, but something. Maybe Darcy is being blackmailed, or mind controlled. Who's to say. And 2) Darcy finds out about Collins's proposal FROM Collins, leading to a very "you said WHAT to my wife" "well she wasn't your wife at the time" "that is NOT the point sir" kind of exchange. At which point Darcy is no longer able to calmly zone out for the duration of their five minute interactions his chill is gone

[mrdarcysdadbod]

Also having just reread the last like 7 chapters of the book, Darcy fully stops talking to Lady Catherine for MONTHS bc of the way she wrote about Elizabeth i have no doubt that hearing Collins blithely recount his Extremely Impertinent Proposal would have Darcy on the verge of violence. Furthermore, given that Mr. Bennet likes to a. visit Pemberley when he's least expected and b. cause problems on purpose, obviously the way it goes down is that Mr. Bennet, imposing on Darcy's hospitality at the same time as Mr. Collins, casually brings up That Time Collins Almost Married Lizzy, encourages Collins as he digs his own grave recounting the proposal, and then sits back to enjoy the show.

[zombeesknees]

#OH MY GOD   #THE FALLOUT SHOW I NEVER KNEW I WANTED   #'Mr Collins is bothering Mr Darcy at the dining table... what is this?! MR BENNET IS COMING IN WITH A STEEL CHAIR!!!!'

[schweetheart]

@marshmallowmcgonagall​

[catchymemes]

[gayvampyr]

wet beast

[gayvampyr]

you know what day it is