Thoughts On Media 🧍🏽‍♂️

He/Him I’m an artist that loves media and I made this space to share my thoughts

[pan-gaa]

Hello! Just wanted to say that I made this blog to share my thoughts on media I like. It would mostly be anime/manga but I will also talk about other things. Please have in mind this is all just for fun and my personal opinion so don’t take what I say too seriously, my first language is not English sorry for the misspelling. I will be happy if there are people that find my rambling somewhat interesting

[plastiboo]

[pan-gaa]

Ik this acc has been dead, life has been in the way a lot and just lots of stuff…

I have so many things I wanna share so expect a lil comeback of my ramblings in 2026

[pan-gaa]

6 Camp horror Movies

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5 recent horror movies for your Halloween list

[paw2paw]

^O^ 💻💿📟 ִ ۫  ּ   ִ  ۫   ˑ ֗  ִ   ˑ   

[asyor]

['Fruit of Good and Evil' is worsening your guilty conscience.]

[blerghie]

i still can’t believe kdj canonically has PALE SKIN and LONG EYELASHES and SMOOTH SOFT CHEEKS and EYES GLEAMING LIKE STARS and a SLENDER PHYSIQUE and the fact that everyone else sees him through a filter that like?? distorts his looks? forces people to forget what he looks like? makes it so that people can look at him and see his features but not make sense of his entire appearance? makes people only remember parts of a whole like a forever incomplete jigsaw puzzle?

kim dokja is a fucking. biblically accurate angel.

[swagvo1d]

you will not replace me

[strawbsonmars]

my beloveds

[pan-gaa]

Survived Holiday season as a retail worker!!

Hopefully I can start posting more again, have a bunch of stuff I’ve been wanting to talk about.

[pan-gaa]

My problem with the BL industry -part 2-

The decrease of media literacy and understanding of intent.

"Who cares? Its all fiction anyways." Is a statement seen a lot when encountering discourse on the ethics of some media. This statement is seen as a fixed all for some people when defending their interests and characters or media that can be considered quite questionable. But is it really true? Is all fiction safe from criticism on their morals or showcasing of sensitive topics? Well in my opinion no, and ill be yapping about how massive this problem is on the BL industry and fanbase.

This is when media literacy comes into play and show how important it is to understand it. A lot of the time when this is needed is to understand the intent of the creator. The intent of the creator seems hard to pin point but we can get a pretty good idea by how they showcase these scenes and situations. In a lot of criticism towards some of the top BLs in the recent years is that it romanticizes abuse and toxic relationships. Of course the issue we most have is not that these stories showcase these real issues, its that there is no real consequence on the abuse, the stories are written with a "happy ending". The abuser gets the victim in the end most of the time after a "redemption arc", so what does the intent tell the reader? When you see these types of relationships you root for the redemption arc of the person at fault? Victims should just get used to it because their toxic partner is attractive? It might seem like a stretch and dramatic when I say it like this but I invite people to always question what intent is being portrayed in the story.

Of course just because something bad is shown, it doesn't mean it is supporting it. That's why media literacy is very important when consuming any type of media, its about understanding what message is being portrayed under that intent. Whether it was the creator's intention or not, it is important to bring up these criticisms specially when its media consumed by so many types of people. Another example I wanna share is not only the intent in the writing but also in the art of the work. I'm gonna use Painter of the Night and Killing Stalking as examples, both show situations of kidnapping, of course one leans more towards horror than the other but that just earns it even more criticism. Both somehow showcase something in similar way, the intimate scenes, long and detailed intimate scenes. Multiple angles, frames and poses, reminiscent of media that is made to be enjoyed. Its not only the fact that these scenes were drawn but how, what was the intent on showcasing these characters in difficult situations but still drawn the exact same way as the media created to be enjoyed. Of course both of these stories had different endings but I think the intent interpreted by how they were drawn can be reflected on the type of fandom that has been attracted.

There are more examples that you see once you start to question the intent that is being shown in these stories. People interpret these differently and shape it to their liking, that's why I think there is quite a big problem with media literacy lately. Again, I myself have been a BL consumer for many years and this is all my personal opinion so take what I say with a grain of salt.

[pan-gaa]

LGBTQ+ Manga recs from my own collection

The Bride was a Boy

Autobiographical manga about the life of a Japanese transgender woman, her transition and how she became a bride.

10 Dance

A Latin dancer and a standard ballroom dancer train to learn each other’s specialties for the big competition “10-dance”. Things get complicated as their relationship starts becoming something else.

Boys run the riot

Short story of how a transman teen uses his love for art and fashion to show his identity.

I think our son is gay

A beautiful story from the pov of a young mother who supports and cares for her son that she thinks might be gay.

Last gender

All types of queer people gather at a certain bar. We follow the stories of some of these characters and how do they deal with their identities.

Until I meet my husband

Manga adaptation of an autobiographical essay done by a gay activist in Japan. Here we follow how he traveled his sexuality and relationships in his life.

HAPPY PRIDE!!

[pan-gaa]

Apothecary diaries is a hidden gem!

A short and quick summary plus me being obsessed with it.

The story involves Maomao an apothecary raised in the red light district, she then gets kidnapped and made to work as a maid in the imperial court. Her intelligence and talent are later recognized and she starts being asked to solve various strange things happening in that side of the castle. There are many secrets and conspiracies going around involving people or varios position and powers. This is based on historical Chinese period may I add which is very important to remember since it ask a lot of context.

Ok I know it was very superficial but I want people to give it a chance. This story is something I dint thought I’ll love so much but it truly is an amazing story. At first the anime was marketed kind of like a Shoujo? At least from the previews I saw before which couldn’t be farther from the truth. Contrary to the artstyle and colors, this is not a rose colored shoujo! This story covers real issues involving sex work, social classes, how woman are treated in history overall. Jinshi, the male lead, is someone who supports the main character well and is not there only for the tension. This is a drama mystery that can seem pretty simple at the start but it unfolds beautifully into more lore that just grabs at you and you can’t look away.

Now I may be biased because I love and consume other historical Chinese media like MXTX novels but I would say that I had absolutely no expectations for this series when I started it. In fact I only did start it because of a friend convincing me to watch it with them and I couldn’t be more glad we did. If you are someone who is into Josei or pretty realistic mysteries I think you would enjoy this story.

[pan-gaa]

Sorry for the sudden disappearance all of my free time has been going to bg3 since it came out and I’ve been with my love Astarion 😌

[pan-gaa]

My problem with the BL industry -part 1-

Where do we draw the line?

I want to start this by saying I myself have been a BL fan for many years, I just want to share my thoughts on the issues cultivated by this industry in the eyes of a queer man. I want to focus on the sexualization of “toxic” more so abusive relationships that are portrayed. Because the manwha Jinx is one of the most popular BLs at the moment and it fits as an example of my point, I’ll be speaking a little bit about it.

What was the purpose of the BL genre? Well for women it was a media that served as escapism since most mature media was very much male oriented. Women could not feel connected to the characters portrayed only to please men’s disturbing fantasies. Between the impossible body standards and the clear lack of regard for the woman autonomy it isn’t a surprise that women felt quite disconnected from 18+ media. That’s when an adult genre came to fruition, 18+ media for women by women but no woman was portrayed in these stories in fact the main focus was relationships between 2 men. The disconnect from societal pressures helped woman enjoy 18+ content without feeling guilt or disgust. But how a genre created to disconnect toxic attributes in media became just that but for another demographic? Now the people on the other end of this discomfort are queer people, not only gay men. Romanticizing dangerous power dynamics, dubious consent, sexualizing toxic stereotypes,infantilization ect. The list goes on of all real life issues that the queer community deal with but are nothing but entertainment within this genre.

Not all BLs are bad! Im very aware since again I am quite the fan of some but this is more me criticizing the industry per se. The problem is that toxicity sells, what companies want is to sell and that opens the doors for people to make more toxicity for whatever their reasons. All that moves us to where we are today were we have one the most popular current themes being Stockholm syndrome and how it is hot. I’ve been seeing myself how I have been dropping more series than I have finished, I kept getting hit with more and more of this toxic clichés. It was like I was playing bingo and hoping I didn’t win, I would get so excited for stories that did the bare minimum and yet those were hard to find which has made my current experience quite exhausting. Of course I’m no longer the teen who would let anything pass because “hot characters” and even more hot scenes but now as an adult that just doesn’t cut it anymore. Showing toxic situations in media on its own is not the problem but it is the context in which they are shown, these are not cautionary tales but “love stories” the intent is for you to root for those characters. Not only is the relationships an issue but the way they portray queer people overall, the disrespect for bisexual people, trans people and lesbians in some of these stories is quite appalling since these are suppose to be queer stories. I think this says a lot about the industry and some of the artists involved, before it could maybe be used as an excuse the lack of knowledge but to me that no longer holds in the age of the internet.

Now I’ll like to mention one of the stories I’ve personally been a little tired of seeing, Jinx. I was quite interested in the manwha when it was announced, as I’ve mentioned before I’m all about the visuals and seeing the improvement of the artist was endearing. I’m aware the BL is still ongoing but I have read BJ Alex which can add a little context on how the artist manages their stories. This is not a personal diss on the artist or those who are reading the story, I just think with all these kinds of popular stories we gotta ask ourselves, Where do we draw the line? Jinx is your typical story of the protagonist being someone that went thru trauma and has to spent their whole life trying to pay some insane debt, then comes the romantic interest being a famous rich person with an unchecked personality disorder that takes advantage of the power dynamic and uses the protagonist to his convenience. It is quite an overdone premise and in this story we see it as a black listed physical therapist and a famous athlete, the protagonist Dan appears to act like an Angel while Jaekyung keeps bullying him and using him for other acts. The story so far has been quite literally only this, and you see in the comments people hoping for a redemption arc for Jaekyung, at some point in this story readers have to realize that a good ending would be Dan leaving this situation but unfortunately I don’t have much hope for that. Jinx is not the only story doing this but it is one of the most popular at the moment, we also have stories like Painter Of The Night which is literally the love story between a kidnapper and his victim.

BL is a genre that can be enjoyed by anyone yet it seems like lately it can become queer stories but not for queer people but more so toxic fantasies put onto another group of people that also have to fight for their own respect. It’s perfectly fine to enjoy good ol 18+ media that is morally grey or maybe somewhat toxic but when an industry gains so much money on portraying real issues as unserious fantasies so continuously, I think it’s time we ask ourselves as the readers; When is it too much? When does it get disrespectful to the people it’s portraying? Where do we draw the line?

[pan-gaa]

My Dearest Self With Malice Aforethought review

As we are getting closer to the spooky season which is my favorite. I’m feeling like sharing some good horror and psychological horror media.

My Dearest self with malice aforethought is a psychological horror mystery manga that centers mental illnesses such as DID (dissociate identity disorder). I would like to give a huge TW since this story covers sensitive content like abuse, gore, violent scenes, and themes on mental health some might find triggering.

Protagonist Eiji Urashima is a college student trying to live his life as ordinary as possible while he carries the weight of his family’s reputation of being evil. Eiji’s known as the son of a serial killer and that image had him deal with all sorts of difficulties. Even so he was able to hide it and live as a normal college student, drinking with friends and trying to get a girlfriend. Things seem to be normal until Eiji’s starts noticing that days have passed since he was conscious but by his friends statements he’s been going to class and living normally. Not only that but Eiji somehow in that time got a girlfriend who said he did things he never had a memory of. This story covers how Eiji tries to solve this mystery and by trying aspects of his life start to spiral.

I purposely tried to give as little detail as possible since this story’s plot is mainly carried by its surprise element. I wasn’t sure what to expect of this story at first and honestly I wasn’t that exited to read it. The summary I had read was a plot I had seen before and one that many creators can’t seem to work well but once the story was gaining momentum, I couldn’t stop reading. The mystery and the anxiety of not knowing if what we saw or read was true, how the artstyle helped carry that suspense.

It was quite interesting how mental illness was portrayed in this manga, truthfully I tend to be skeptical because of how bad mental illness are portrayed in manga/ other media. Of course I wouldn’t say that it’s perfect but if you are someone tired of crime mysteries that misuse mental illness you might like this read. The plot twists were really enjoyable and the storytelling was thrilling. The explanation at the end really ties it all together so the ending was satisfactory.

All together I give this manga a 8.5/10 and it has my recommendation stamp.👍🏽