trying on a metaphor
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Jules of Nature
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Kaledo Art
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noise dept.
Sade Olutola
Peter Solarz
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will byers stan first human second
tumblr dot com
pixel skylines
izzy's playlists!
Cosimo Galluzzi
macklin celebrini has autism
One Nice Bug Per Day
DEAR READER
occasionally subtle
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@patrickl1969
౨ৎ‧₊˚ they'll message you after a post talking about how sad and ill you are too?? can they just be normal 🙏
The problem is Tumblr after all, I am a perfectly mature person who isn't interested in all these young girl blogs. I am also not interested in the porn blogs or the musings that someone thinks is intereesting to others whether it is or not.
Growing up, I've realized how many times guys have sexualised me because of certain physical features I can't change. I remember one time when I wore my hair in two puffs, and a guy in my class asked if it was for someone to hold in bed. I was only 14 at the time, and I often get told I must give good head because I have big lips. I'm done with society constantly joking about the sexualization of young girls. They should be respected and not objectified based on their appearance.
I am just going to add that it is dangerous to generalize whether about all guys as aaleighha appears to be doing or about girls or women. My brother is a guy who generalizes about "all women" whereas I have tried to keep an open mind about males and females. Not all guys are interested in women, not all women are interested in guys and it is true for boys or girls as well. As a young boy, I hung around with a girl whose parents were friendly with mine. Later she apparently became or proved to be a real immature snob. Not all the girls I grew up around were snobs but it seems that at least one or two that I eventually came to like were snobbish. A girl whom I wrote to when we were both young she and I wrote to each other for over ten years. She invited me to England to attend her wedding, I met her and her fiance, their families, before that day. Unfortunately, only two females I've met have ever cared enough to be willing to go steady with me. One other woman whom I thought was nice proved to be a user as well as very confusing, if not a total liar about her life situations.
Take a look! 📌
Take a look! 📌 https://pin.it/75kh7oM9J
Mockingbird and Hawkeye
The greatest romance that Marvel "dissed" and the greatest Hawkeye arc that they failed to appreciate.
#Tumblr I have NO intention of ever going ad free when you do not even provide a properly working app or website.
One of the truer things that John Lennon said in his lifetime which was too short?
Tumblr stop annoying me with your pop up ad about ads annoying us and paying you a ransom will remove the ads. You don't do anything to earn any such ransom.
Tumblr sucks and that is why I have been away for long periods of time, not posted anything and even uninstalled the app more than once.
Tumblr stop annoying me with your pop up ad about ads annoying us and paying you a ransom will remove the ads. You don't do anything to earn any such ransom.
Please stop infantlizing autistic people
Stop being weirded out when we cuss. Stop being weirded out when we talk about nsfw topics. Stop being weirded out when we are semiverbal or nonverbal.
We can smoke too, we can drink, vape, and cuss and do anything normal people can do. We can have (concented) sexual relationships. We can kiss people. We can have kinks. We can like BDSM or have fetishes. We are not innocent little kids.
Just because we have a disability doesn't mean we aren't people.
Just because we sometimes need to live with someone else doesn't mean we aren't people.
Just because we don't pick up on social clues doesn't mean we aren't people.
STOP INFANTILIZING US. STOP CALLING US INNOCENT. STOP THINKING YOU NEED TO PROTECT US. WE ARE REGULAR PEOPLE TOO.
Disabled people should be allowed to exist in public. Yes, I mean all disabled people.
That includes people with tic disorders.
That includes people who smell ‘bad’.
That includes people who can’t help being loud.
That includes people who move ‘strangely’.
That includes people with bulky mobility aids.
That includes people who drool.
That includes people who struggle with incontinence.
We all should get to exist, however that looks, and go out in public, use public transport, do activities outside our homes. And we should be allowed to do those things without being glared at or having ableist things said to us.
I agree. Where I work, I have worked with two or more people who were not easy to get along with. One was disabled due to an accident, he was hard to get along with and prone to violence. I would have gladly worked with him, even if it meant me being in a different department but his unpredictable nature and his violence caught up with him and management fired him. I thought they did him a grave disservice but they have done similarly to others and so even in a union environment, we need to protect everyone better than we presently do. Even though he was violent towards me (not physically though) and he did hit a coworker (his lead hand) with a buggy, I feel badly that things couldn't have been sorted out and that he'd still be working for the firm, even in a different capacity.
the man who owns and runs the thai restaurant in my town knows me by name. he is one of the kindest and most thoughtful men i know. i started ordering from his place back in january, which was when i got my fibromyalgia diagnosis. back then i was using a walker, had limited mobility in my entire body but especially my hands, and was very visibly in pain. i always ordered the same thing: yellow curry with no meat, potatoes and carrots only (i have texture and other dietary issues). he always made it a point to make sure i could get out the door and carry the food safely. he had his workers package the food so that it was easier for me to open. as i kept coming back and i told him a little bit about my health status, he would always encourage me to keep going. he told me about how the spices he used were good for inflammation and began to edit the recipe just for me so that spices that were even better for fighting inflammation were used. he’d give me extra portions and despite the fact that i would tip every time, i realized later that he never charged my card for them. as time went on and my condition began to get better, especially with the help of a physical therapist, he would make encouraging remarks and tell me how happy he was for me. the day i came in without my walker, he practically jumped for joy, and despite my insistence, he gave me my meal for free that day. i continue to make progress with my conditions and i continue to go to the thai place. this man who does not know me personally and who i hardly know anything about is one of my favorite people. it’s interactions with humans like these that make loving life easier. and his curry really does help my chronic condition. it’s comfort food taken to the next level.
Thank you for sharing this with us.
I never listen to men’s opinions in general but ESPECIALLY when it comes to movies. you’re going to tell, as a man, that the barbie movie was bad? you just can’t possible understand the complexities of the transition between girlhood and womanhood that happens before it should. you have no idea what it’s like to cling so desperately onto your own imagination as an adult after spending your pre-teen/teenage years pretending that playing with dolls and wearing pink was so beneath you. you don’t understand fighting with your mother only to one day realize she is living through you and doing all that she can to make sure you go leap and bounds further than her. men couldn’t possible grasp the impact watching Barbie herself cry and say she wasn’t perfect or pretty anymore, when your whole childhood was built around carrying her in your backpack and knowing that one day you’ll be the president, an astronaut, and a model because she was. because she was yours and you were her! yeah, the movie was silly and funny and self aware and maybe you don’t think it’s “that deep”, but as a woman you just get it. as someone growing up still in your childhood bedroom that no longer has a dream house but the dolls are still above you in the attic because you can’t throw them out, you get it
I find it disturbing that someone dismisses all men (which includes me as I am a man). I do not dismiss all women even though I have been treated poorly by some, maybe many, of them. From my sisters to my mom, from friends to those whom I hoped to love, they are all different women and I have experienced different treatment by each of them. I get along better with my eldest sister than my sister who is closer to me in age (I practically grew up with just my parents). I was closer to my mom than my dad, though she could be very hurtful to me and others. Perhaps my greatest friendship was with a young woman I hadn't met in person until she invited me to her wedding, we wrote to each other for over 10 years. I spent a month in England, a week or so in Germany, thanks to her.
There are two main kinds of reactions people have to seeing someone using a white cane walking towards them: fearful and aggressive.
The fearful are the ones who press themselves flat against walls as you pass by, the ones who see you coming and cross the street to not walk by you, the ones like the guy who walked into my path and then, upon seeing me, leapt two feet backwards shouting, "Oh shit!"
The fearful are an annoyance, but they're not usually dangerous. They don't seem to grasp that the path is generally wide enough for both of us, that my cane only takes up two more inches either side of me and isn't going to kill them. They're the ones that my friends remark on most, because once you realise what they're doing you can never stop noticing that people do this.
The aggressive, however, are a different story.
The aggressive are the ones who stare you down as you walk towards them like they're playing a game of chicken, the ones who wave and say hello and when you reply they use it as evidence you're not blind. They're the ones who try to hopscotch over your cane. They're the ones who will kick your cane and try to trip you up for fun. They're the ones that deliberately slow down, giggling as they look back at you, because they want you to walk into them and to hurt yourself. They're the ones who you'll walk by and, even though neither you nor your cane even brushes them, they'll get angry at you because don't you know you could hurt someone by walking around with that thing? Don't you know you should have someone with you at all times to make sure you don't hit someone?
There's a different kind of aggressive, too, and I don't know a single blind person who has not encountered this kind. This is the kind of aggressive who tries to "help" you, the kind who grabs your arm and drags you across roads without talking to you or asking. The kind who pull you into oncoming traffic and expect you to be grateful. The kind who pick up your cane to lead you. The kind who will get you hit by a car in the name of helpfulness. This kind does not realise or even care that it is terrifying to have an unseen person grab you and start dragging you away, who don't get that the cane is your contact with the world around you and they have stripped you of knowledge and safety by picking it up off the ground. This kind does not realise or care that it is still kidnapping, still assault, and they expect you to be grateful that they deigned to "help" you.
All three kinds don't see you as a person. The fearful see you as an obstacle, the aggressive see you as an idle amusement or a threat, and the helpful aggressive see you only as a way to feel good about themselves.
The second you hold a white cane you are unpersoned.
Do your local blind person a favour and cut that shit out.
I echo what this person has shared. Stop treating people, who have a cane, as if they aren't people.
I merely echoed what the original writer said because "it isn't all about me"...but I would like to add my own experience. I am not sure how many blind people I have met, I pray that I have always been respectful to them. The one time I recall, it was recent, and they had a companion with them. I noted the cane too. I gave those two people space and slowed up my own walk as they were entering nearer traffic on a small island which has very little room to spare. On a personal note, I have been very fortunate to have good or great eyesight for all of my 50+ years, but recently noted that I have trouble reading. I tried to tell myself it was not what it probably was. Ultimately, I may be losing my eyesight and certainly am need of glasses for reading, my visual range is still quite good. I know that even glasses are expensive and I am a low income worker. I am trying to not be fearful of what the future holds, being a single male. I am trying to adjust as best I can.
From an awkward reunion between Shane, Amy and Lou to Miley’s fate, Lyndy’s sleepless nights and both Katie and Jack and Lisa learning to step out of their comfort zones, a lot happened in Heartland season 17 episode 4.
Read our recap to find out more -> https://tvshowpilot.com/tv-reviews/heartland/s17e4-review/
I know what people are getting at when they say not to do this but I do actually appreciate knowing if someone's mental illness is at work when they give me an apology? like I don't think it's wrong to say "sorry for ghosting you, I had a paranoid episode and could barely look at my phone for two months" or "sorry for missing this event, I was really depressed and couldn't get out of bed" or "sorry I acted really weird and left quickly the other day, something triggered me and I couldn't figure out how to cool down until I was alone" because those are full and complete answers that would be less accurate if the symptom were edited out. I know what those things mean and I would actually prefer to know if my friend messed something up for reasons not entirely within their control rather than have them attempt to take responsibility for things they already actively try to avoid doing.
exactly!!
also, any hurt feelings I have from someone not responding, not showing up, or leaving early would be based in the fear that they didn't like me or care about me as much as I thought. so knowing there is a clear reason for these events that has nothing to do with me or our relationship erases that fear entirely. our relationship is actually strengthened by them trusting me with that information and vulnerability.
these sorts of conversations give the opportunity to meaningfully address both people's needs from the friendship through mutual support. if I feel very hurt by getting no response due to an anxiety disorder or past abuse or even just plain old mundane insecurity, I can also bring that up in the conversation and we can work together to figure out what to do in the situation next time that's realistic for both of our abilities.
maybe they can't speak or figure out the language to let me know what's happening while triggered but they could add a shortcut in their phone so when they text a couple special characters it would autocomplete an explanation that they got triggered and need to leave and will follow up later. or if they deal with depression episodes, same thing, could set up something that explains the situation that doesn't require much energy. I don't have personal experience with paranoia so I don't have a solution on hand for how that might be communicated, but I trust outside this hypothetical between two friends there might be a means that could be developed to communicate that too.
I think sometimes with popular discourse on apologies, there is too much emphasis on assigning blame (i.e. who is at fault for the hurt feelings and how can they make it up to the other person) as a universal need to address any kind of hurt.
understanding fault is very important in some situations in which there is clear power imbalance, exploitation, control, or deliberate infliction of harm on one person for the benefit of the other. (or even if, in a less malicious example, there is simple everyday thoughtlessness/selfishness that can be rectified by realizing their negative impact & changing behavior that is well within their ability to change.)
but, not every single situation in which someone feels bad due to others' behavior is one where assigning fault is important for repair. Sometimes two people are both genuinely and fully trying their best to maintain their relationship with each other, and both are struggling a lot and feelings get hurt. In those cases, mutual support to meet the needs of the relationship is needed. transparent discussion on how to best accommodate their respective disabilities, emotional baggage, or material difficulties that constrain the kind of support they can give is genuinely important for meaningful repair in the relationship moving forward. to neglect this kind of honest communication about support needs and abilities (and instead resort to a generic statement of accountability without context) is to ensure further unnecessary hurt as almost inevitable.
In my experience, I had someone I cared for deeply whereas they probably barely cared that I was alive. We were to communicate by email to stay in touch, yet if they had told me that they didn't know if they could stay in touch (they were to work and live in a foreign country) I would have been as understanding as possible. It was their idea to stay in touch, not mine, and their reaction to my sharing how I felt about them was actually a clue to how events would unfold. They didn't accept or respect my sharing, which was not a demand or request for them to reciprocate my interest in them. I noticed that long silences occurred and I finally confronted them (via email) and they mentioned being depressed due to their actions and circumstances. They didn't change or improve their behaviour and so the relationship was "ended". I would have preferred that they simply indicate they might not stay in touch rather than even suggest staying in touch. They were not reliable while still in the country so, I might have forseen their lack of reliability. It is very hard being involved in a relationship of any kind when unrequited love is involved.
accessible public transport means multiple priority seating areas and wheelchair bays. not turning away disabled people because there's already one on board.
accessible gigs, shows, and venues means multiple platformed seating areas with space for wheelchair users and their companions. not just a single carer.
accessible public spaces means building changing places toilets that are suitable for adults who use changing tables, hoists, slings, and other assistive devices. most "accessible" public toilets are not suitable for these.
accessible architecture means planning buildings around disabled people's needs, not just installing ramps at the side entrance as an afterthought.
accessible employment means unlimited sick days, non-discriminatory healthcare plans, and the complete destruction of the recruitment industry.
accessible gaming means adjustable difficulty in all aspects of the game, colorblind settings, subtitles, and flashing scenes being switched off by default.
accessible sex means education about safe and pleasurable sex for everyone, sex toys that work with no or limited movement, non-judgemental and unrestricted healthcare.
accessible art means listing ingredients and pigments to make paints safe for mouth painters, creating digital tools that work with body parts other than the hands, and valuing every medium equally.
accessible education means abolishing deadlines and forgiving all loans. it means affordable adapted on-site accommodation. it means more part-time course offerings and no attendance minimum, and interpreters/assistants/translators available for all who need them.
rebuild the world with us in mind this time around.
after a long day of getting told, "we hate you, please die" by conservatives and their policies, i like to go to queer meetups so i can be told, "we hate you, please die" by a whole new group of people for literally the exact same thing about me
Just to be clear, if your idea of an ideal future at any point involves killing disabled people or allowing disabled people to die- you're not a punk, you're a fascist. Hope that helps
