**effervescent

paisley hightopp || 21 || computer science major

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

orionliddle‌:

Letting out a slow breath when she told him to breathe, he nodded frantically but to him it felt normal, all his movements felt normal when to anyone with sober eyes….it was far from that. If anyone could see him like this, it’d be Paisley. She understood him and, while she hadn’t seen him this strung out, she would never judge him. Sighing as he smacked his lips together at the mention of water, he suddenly realized how dry his mouth was, “You’re so smart Pai….I wish I was that smart. Maybe I wouldn’t fuck up all the time if I was…maybe I’d be able to think shit through logically every now and then. Sure would’ve helped spare me from this bullshit.” He explained before holding out his arms to her with a roll of his eyes, “I’m not gonna throw up, least I don’t think so, I feel fine. I just….need to lay down.” The blonde told her as he laid on his back, eyes falling shut as he let out a little huff of breath, leg still bouncing as he rubbed the palms of his hands all over the grass under them. It was only when he heard her voice shake that he’d looked up and over to her with glossy eyes, “Oh no, no, no, no Paisley don’t cry. I made you cry, fuck, please just…don’t cry. I’m here, I’m right here, see? Alive. Here. I’m just a little….I’m not doing well but I will be. Maybe. I don’t know how this all works but….” Pausing, his hand came to his chest for a moment, swallowing down the sharp pain that was there, which he wasn’t sure was a sign to seek medical help or the side effects of a broken heart….he’d never had one before. “I don’t like it.” He finally said, a little late but it finally caught up with his thoughts as he plopped back down onto the ground. Her hand fell in his and he really was grateful for her, something in the back of his mind tacked up to remind her of that when he wasn’t so high. “Two weirdos, aren’t we?” The boy told her with a doped up smile, his grip in her hand lightening as he felt himself grow rapidly tired in an instant.

Pai wasn’t judging Orion. She knew that he needed something to calm him down. But this? This was the worst she had ever seen him and she just didn’t know how to handle it. She didn’t think he was wrong or bad for having taken so many drugs but she was in a panic on how to handle it. Orion needed to be safe and this wasn’t safe. His nodding was frantic and Pai sighed slightly. Taking his hand, she placed it over her heart and then did the same with her own hand, moving it to his. “Breathe with me, okay?” Then, she focused on taking slow, deep breaths rather than the quick, shallow ones he had been taking. “You’re smart, Ry. You’re very smart. Don’t say that about yourself.” He was smart in a way that she couldn’t be. Smart about the world, about others. All she knew was computers. Hell, if it weren’t for Orion, she’d probably only have artificial intelligence as a friend. It’s why she needed him. He kept her grounded. Paisley wiped at her eyes and nodded. “I know. It’s okay. I just-- I wish I could do more for you.” The girl whispered, “I don’t know what more I can do for you.” For the first time in their lives, she wondered if she was enough. If - when everything turned dark and dreary - her presence was enough for him. At that moment in time, it didn’t feel like it. Paisley brushed some of his hair out of his face again and tried to find her strength once more. “I’m fine. You will be fine. We’re going to be fine. Together.” They had to be. It was them against the world. Paisley moved closer to Orion and finally pulled him closer so that he could rest against her should he need to. “Two weirdos. But one thing is for sure, neither of us will break the others heart. It may feel like you’re shattered right now but I’m here. I will always be here to pick up the pieces.”

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

text message ✉ ela & paisley

ELA: (...)

ELA: (...)

ELA: can you please just keep me updated on how he's doing/if he does need to go to the hospital?

ELA: Please.

ELA: I'll lose my mind not knowing.

PAI: Of course.

PAI: Hes calming down a bit now. I'm making him drink water.

PAI: He panicked when I mentioned the hospital so I'm not taking him yet.

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

orionliddle‌:

Humming as he leaned back, he laid flat on his back as he stared up at the sky, sighing under his breath when he heard her, “Oh shit, yeah, you’re right….” There was a small chuckle that left him as he ran his hands down over his face, breath getting a little more shallow for a moment before he glanced back over to her, only widening his eyes as he heard her talk again. A hospital. The idea shot panic into his chest, and he shook his head, “No, no, no….please, no. i don’t want to go to the hospital, please don’t…they’ll do all these tests and it’ll make my mom look bad and I can’t. I’m already at rock bottom, let me wallow in it. I-I don’t know how much I took, I can’t fucking remember that.” He admitted as he sat up, squeezing his eyes shut as he got dizzy from the sudden motion, swaying a bit as he swallowed down the dry feeling in his mouth before rubbing his temples. “I’m not gonna OD, don’t be crazy Pai. I’ll be fine, I always am.” He muttered, voice still empty as he blinked a few times and opened his eyes to stare back into the distance once more. “But yet, he still always gets what he wants, doesn’t he?” Orion said open endedly, kicking his leg out as he groaned, “I love her, Paisley. And I wanted that back, which is stupid. I should’ve known, I should’ve assumed that this wasn’t going to work but I wanted it so bad when it came to her. There’s nothing to do, I just wanted this feeling to go away in my chest. It’s gone, She’s gone, Everything is shit, the world is shit, we all die alone, whatever.”  He was talking fast again, words falling on top of each other as he sighed, balling up his fists before slamming them into the ground a few times. “I think I just….I think I need to lay down.” All the sudden he felt tired, and he laid back down on his back, sighing as he nodded, “Yeah, that’s…that’s so much better, wow.”

“Okay. Okay, calm down. Sweets, breathe. Just breathe.” Seeing the panicked look in his eyes, Paisley knew she would have to deal with this all on her own. She was not capable of dealing with this but she would. She’d do it for Orion. He would do it for her. “I won’t take you to the hospital. But-” she emphasized, “then I need you to drink a whole glass of water and I’m also going to need to check your pulse alright? And, if you’ve gotta vomit, do not swallow it down. Just go for it. Okay? I’m-- I’m worried for you.” Pai couldn’t remember him ever taking this much and she didn’t know what to do or say to help. “You’re fine now but what about in twenty years when all these drugs catch up to your liver? I can’t keep watching you kill yourself. I can’t just sit by as you do this.” Paisley said softly. Tears were coming to her eyes and she didn’t know how to handle it. She never got emotional, not like this, but it was terrifying to see her best friend in such a low place. Paisley went and lay beside him. She turned her head to watch as he spoke. “You shouldn’t have assumed that, Ry. You shouldn’t because you deserve to be loved back. She should’ve loved you back.” And suddenly she was angry all over again. Paisley took his hand into hers. “You won’t die alone. You’re stuck with me.” 

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

text message ✉ ela & paisley

ELA: The hospital?? What did he take?

ELA: I can meet you where ever you are if you need help maybe I can talk to him or

ELA: please take him if he needs to go Pai

ELA: I know. Pai, I know. I never meant for any of this to happen.

ELA: [read ✓] (...) (...) (...)

ELA: I just need to know that he is ok.

PAI: I don't know. i'm trying to figure that out. Right now I'm making him take a shower and drink a bunch of water.

PAI: No.

PAI: I'm sorry ela but its best if you don't show up at all or reach out to him. He needs to have that separation right now. Seeing you might make it worse.

PAI: I'm sorry.

PAI: I'll do what I need to. I'm not losing him.

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

orionliddle‌:

He couldn’t stop bouncing his knee, he felt like if he did that his whole body might shut down, and that was the last thing he wanted. Honestly, he’d lost track of what and how much he’d taken. A pill here, a joint there, a tab at one point, a couple of shots? His body seemed to handle it alright, Orion had a tolerance that could last him until he had his body weight in pills. Suddenly, her arms wrapped around him and he sort of just sat there, staring into the distance in a zoned off state. “If I was so amazing….she wouldn’t have kissed someone else.” Voice still monotoned, he tossed his arms up, “We hear all these stories about happily ever afters, but where we come from, we don’t get it. We aren’t Isle kids, but we aren’t royals, we float mindlessly into the sea of between so I was a fucking idiot. Dumb, I’m dumb. I mean, I’ve heard it before but it never really bothered me until now.” The blonde admitted, brows coming together as he pulled back to look at her, eyes still empty but wide, “Kill me? I’m alive, see?” Grabbing her hand, he put it to his chest, letting her feel his heart beat. It was rapid, pounding in his body like it might burst, but he felt….limitless, like he was floating almost. “See? Alive.” He said with a nod of his head before rolling his eyes, “Mitch, fucking Mitch. Why wouldn’t anyone want to fucking be like him? Future King, gets every girl he wants, he’s the one every wants. I’m stupid for even trying to compete with him, shit, I wish he would’ve fucking thrown me out my window that day he came in. i wish Ela would’ve just….” Saying her name made him pause, burying his face in his hands, “Ela…” He repeated a bit softer, a huff of breath leaving him.

Paisley wasn’t going to be able to get through to him like this. Orion was spiraling and she felt helpless. What could she do? Ela had fucked up not Orion but he would never understand that. And Orion had a point. Neither of them seemed to fit in anywhere. Maybe that’s why she had such a difficult time trying to make friends in Auradon. “You aren’t dumb. You’re really high right now, Ry...” Paisley said softly, hoping to be as soothing as she possibly could. Her hand met his heart and Pai could feel her own heart breaking for him. There was something in his eyes that she’d never seen there before and it killed her to think that he was this broken. All because Ela couldn’t have been decent and shut this all down before it began. All because she’d given a boy the hope that their love story could be like the fairytales everyone else lived by. “Ry, I need to know how much you took. Your heartbeat.... it’s not normal. And so fucking help me, I will take you to the hospital immediately if you don’t tell me how much you took. I’m not watching you OD in front of me.” Paisley tilted her head to the side, “He’s boring. He uses his power to get what he wants and has no personality because of it,” She didn’t actually know him but anyone compared to Orion was boring. They paled in comparison to him. They always would. “I wish she would have to... Things would have been a lot better if she was honest.” Paisley watched him, “What can I do?” 

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

text message ✉ ela & paisley

ELA: Hey.

ELA: If you have talked to Orion at all tonight, can you please just let me know if he's ok?

ELA: You don't need to tell him I asked or even give me an explaination... I just want to make sure he's with someone who will make sure he is safe & sound.

ELA: I'm just worried.

PAI: [ read 9:45pm ]

PAI: I've seen him. He's not doing well. In fact I think I might just need to take him to the hospital because I don't know what he's put in his system.

PAI: Why couldn't you just tell him you weren't over mitch in the beginning?

PAI: Ela hes my person. Hes my best friend. I love you but you hurt him deeply.

PAI: he is in love with you.

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

orionliddle‌:

His head suddenly felt heavy, like the small surface of Paisley’s hands were just holding it up now, his eyelids felt heavy so kept his hues wide open as he looked at his best friend. At least she wouldn’t leave him, at least, he hoped not. That thought alone brought him back to full circle, tapping his fingers together before standing up, pacing a bit before pausing and then groaning as he ran his hands up his face and through his hair, “I just….I had a bad night. Tonight wasn’t good, nope, not good, not good at all.” He was talking fast, and he sighed before sitting back down, bouncing his knee, “Turns out I’m a big fucking idiot, but hey, it’s to be expected. I’m not like Mitch, not at all, who was I kidding, right? I’m stupid, I’m a stupid guy who fell in love and should’ve just minded my business. Why didn’t I…mind my business?” His voice got stuck in the last words as his gaze shot back to Paisley.

Paisley didn’t think she had ever seen him in this dire of a situation and suddenly her heartbeat began to pick up. If he needed medical help, Pai couldn’t provide it. She wasn’t on track to become a doctor. She worked with robots and computers not human beings. Paisley watched Orion and wondered if maybe she was a horrible friend for letting his addiction go on this long. The girl let him ramble for a moment, knowing he needed to get it out, before finally she stepped closer to him and wrapped her arms around him. Paisley said nothing at that moment, just held him. Orion didn’t need to say anymore for her to understand what had happened. “Because...” She finally broke the silence, “You’re an amazing guy who wanted to let love in.” Paisley could kill Mitch and Ela but she wouldn’t. Not yet. She’d give them what was coming to them eventually. “This is their fault. It’s not yours. Don’t---” Pai pulled away, “Don’t let this kill you. Please. Feel sad. Feel angry. Feel what you’re feeling but don’t let this take away my Orion. I need you.” She said desperately before hugging him again. “I don’t want you to be like Mitch...”

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

andrew-darling‌:

Andrew thought for a moment before nodding. It was a nice gesture and surely there would be some people who just really did not feel safe being where they were assigned. “Yeah. I mean, I think it’s a good idea and it doesn’t make sense to force someone to stay somewhere if they’re not actually going to be alright there. We don’t want to just set people up for failure or something like that, right? And for some people it might just be weird or crowded. Like with both Hook and Smee going to Neverland.”

“I mean, Wonderland is a pretty neutral place. And if I tell my parents that they’re lost souls who didn’t feel comfortable in their placement, they’d definitely take them in.” Paisley rambled innocently. Recently, Andrew had become a friend of hers and she found herself seeking out his company more and more often. “Yeah, I heard that. How do you think your parents will react?” She wondered. Andrew seemed like a sweetheart but she also had no idea what his relationship with the VK’s were. “Do you have to share a room?” Pai teased.

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

orionliddle‌:

At this point, he had no idea how much he’d consumed, it was late as hell and he was sitting in the courtyard just….staring at the sky. The blonde thought he had it right, he thought that maybe, just maybe things would be a perfect happily ever after. They’d seemed so right, like she got him on a level no one else but Paisley got him on. Yet here he was, an idiot once again. His eyes were glossy, blank as he stared off with no expression. It wasn’t until he felt a hand on his cheek that he snapped a little out of it, “Hey you….wow, when did you get here?” The blonde breathed out, eyes still wide as he looked at her, “I’m talking. You can hear me right?? Or is my voice trapped in some dungeon. Holy shit, could you imagine if that happened. Fuck. Wow.” His voice was monotoned, even though in his mind it sounded loud and full of life, his body wasn’t having it.

She kept her hands on either side of Orion’s face and waited for the boy to register that she was there. He had taken a lot and she could already see that she’d have to do some damage control. Pai didn’t mind. That was her job as his best friend. His oldest friend. She did it without a second thought but she was worried about him. Orion was pretty much the only person Paisley cared about and who cared about her. If she lost him, she didn’t have anyone. Not to mention, he didn’t deserve to get lost. She pushed some of his hair out of his face and sighed as he finally registered that she was standing before him. “I can hear you now, Ry.” Pai said softly. “What’s going on? You don’t usually take this much...” 

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

“I feel sort of bad not having anyone coming over to Wonderland to stay with us. Everyone else seems so nervous about the arrangements. Do you think I could offer up our home for those who don’t feel safe at certain homes?” Paisley asked with a small frown. She hated feeling like she didn’t have something to do. @andrew-darling

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

“Ry.... you’re scaring me.” Paisley said softly. She stepped closer to her best friend, laying a hand on his arm. That hand then traveled up to his cheek. Bringing his face towards hers, she searched his eyes for any sign that he had actually heard her. “Talk to me...” @orionliddle

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

julienfitzherbert‌:

instantly he felt terrible. “ no you don’t have to leave leave.” he started quickly, hoping she didn’t think he meant that she had to leave altogether. “just a little to the left.” he added again but this time with a small smile in an effort to get his not wanna be mean feelings out in the open. letting his eyes look over the two of them, Julien actually took a moment to look at the little, what must have been a robot. now, he would never claim to be an expert in all things. just a little knowledgeable in too much but truthfully he wasn’t huge into electronics or robotics but he had to say it, it was a little robot. impressive. not sure a lot of people could say that they had built a robot. if she had built him. he didn’t look like one someone bought. “did you build him?” he questioned easily, his hand gesturing to the object in question. 

paisley froze for a moment, peeking over to make sure the boy was sure. then, very slowly she creeped over to the left. then, realizing he meant his left, creeped back the other way before beckoning her robot closer to her. the machine zoomed towards her feet and she straightened with a small smile. the boy examined her bot who she was calling ro - a joke only she thought was funny - and so she examined him. he was drawing, it seemed and since he looked just like fitz, she could only guess this was his twin. “uh yeah. i did. programmed him too but uh.. still working on the updates. right now i have him only doing basic tasks. are you drawing the scenery?” 

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

text || charles

Smee: My home is always organized and I prefer to be fully in control of how I get from one location to another.

Smee: Have you received alternative suggestions?

Pai: Ahhh so you're a control person. Ok thats fine. I'm thinking this will be more for lazy people.

Pai: No but I'm always open to them!

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

syd-clayton‌:

“Who says that the school needs to know? I’m pretty sure they don’t have spy cameras around here and if they do…well, then let’s make sure we give them a show worth watching?” Her hand reached out then, brushing over Paisley’s for a moment before pulling back. “Now now, what’s all this surprise about? Why wouldn’t I want to do any of that with you?” What was it with these Auradon girls and thinking they were less-than? Sydney didn’t get it. Pulling away slightly, her arms went across her chest then as she waited for the answer. Sure maybe Paisley wasn’t some bombshell like Tati was, but she was hardly a pain to look at either, didn’t she know that? “Babe, seriously, you’re a dime. Don’t sell yourself short.”

“They don’t? I wouldn’t put it past them, though. Not after all that’s occurred here.” Paisley acknowledged with a small smile. Auradon definitely took their security seriously. Almost too much so. Okay, well, maybe not too much. The kidnapping had been terrifying. She still had nightmares and panicked over losing Orion. Paisley stared at where Syd’s hand brushed hers, completely dumbfounded and blinked rapidly. “Uh...... I dunno. I mean, I know i’m cute... I just... no ones gone after me before? It’s just weird that seems to have changed a bit? I don’t know.” Pai rambled innocently. 

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

andrew-darling‌:

“Yeah, sort of a board game I guess. There can be a drawn out map that can be used like a board, but there have been times we don’t use that either. Usually just during combat we bring it out so that we know how far something is and whatnot.” He was sure that very little of this actually made sense to the girl, but she had asked what it was. He didn’t want this to turn into another situation like Aria, where he was rambling away only to feel like a massive loser in front of a pretty girl, so this had to be clipped. “But yeah, it’s like a board game. We meet up like once a week and just play our characters using these sheets. I was just working on another one cause I needed to roll a new character then sometimes I just like having character sheets filled out for potential new characters going forward. I’m kind of an always be prepared kind of guy that way.”

All of that made sense to Paisley. She gave a nod and didn’t ask any further questions because that was enough for her. Most thought the girl was mad like her father but, really, both of them were brilliant and understanding complex concepts were their specialty. Everything else, though? Not so much. Social awareness, fashion sense, relationships (well mostly her on that one), were things they struggled with. Not that any of that mattered at this moment in time. “That’s amazing. I’d love to come watch you all play some time. I mean, unless it’s like a super top secret thing in which I totally don’t have to come. It just sounds like something I could get into. And seeing as how my best friend is sort of dating someone, well, I have more free time now.” Paisley nodded again, “You’re a planner. Nothing wrong with that. Organized people are people to be feared. We have our shit ready to go!” 

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

text || open

Ranger: The organizing one. I'm not trusting a damn robot to drive me anywhere.

Ranger: Why is this an important question?

Paisley: Because i'm currently programming my robot and I dont wanna make something no one will use

[pcisleyhightopp-blog]

zmegalos‌:

“hey, you!” zoe called out, spotting her friend just a few strides ahead of her. she picked up her pace to fall into step with paisley, removing her backpack to retrieve something out of it. pulling out copies of her notes she beamed at the girl beside her, offering them to her. “the notes you asked for. how’s studying for finals going?” she slung her bag back onto her back as she spoke, letting out a huff. “and… are you hungry? i have like… an hour and a half ‘til i have to be back at the theta house and i’m starving.” @pcisleyhightopp

pai did the thing that all people being called out to did where she froze, looked around frantically, and then pointed to herself. at the sight of zoe, the girls heart sped up slightly. zoe megalos was not only one of the cutest girls in school but also the kindest and the brightest and... the list went on and on. paisley didn’t understand crushes all too well but she was almost positive thats what she was feeling for zoe. she’d never had a crush before but this... it had to be that right? at first she had thought it was indigestion or fear but no. it was liking someone. so weird “thank you. you’re a godsent.” paisley noted before a blush spread up her neck. she could only imagine how that had sounded escaping her lips. “yes! i mean... i could eat. i could definitely eat.” the girl tried to cover her all too eager tone with a nonchalant wave of the arm but it didn’t turn out well. clutching the notes to her chest, paisley smiled shyly. “you think you’re ready for exams?”