Pedestría 101

Pedestría is the first and greatest country to ever exist. We are a highly advanced society kept out of History books and off the Maps because all other countries are jealous of our greatness and superior intelect. This blog only exists to educate you pig-dogs about our country and to show you our true greatness.

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The Pedestrían Calender

Month         Days

Gurgle         59

NULAM

Kclink          59

NULAM

Nyar-Hkar    59

NULAM

Lumba         59

NULAM

Zsh             59

NULAM

That is it. Month and Days. What did you expect? An actual planner calender. Go to Pedestría, get your own. 

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Wym

Wym is the Uiion (God or Goddess) of Paleontology. Ua (used to describe an unidentafied gender) is also known as ''The Great'' or ''The Fallen'' one. Ua earned the title The Fallen because ua seems to be the only Uiion that not even the current God's have seen. However, proof of Wym's existance is found ALL over the earth; old bones of creatures who roamed this Earth just a single life-cycle ago. Also when a rare unexplainable plant appeared on Pedestrías tallest mountain just southeast of the capital, the God's knew that Wym had to still be alive. It is said that upon death, a true Criscorian will join Wym in uaz Great Hall of Poli-poli (Ice cream). 

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What is: Nulam?

Nulam is a 2 week time period that seperates each month on the Pedestrían calender. For most, these two weeks are a time of prayer and celebration. However, millions of years ago, Pedestría was a harsh place to live. Year round the land was scorching hot, there were 6 active volcanos; earthquakes, dry dusty land, powerful dust storms, venomous reptiles and flesh eating beasts. It's amazing anything even lived here at all, but this is what made Pedestríanz a strong race. Every year, they struggled to endure whatever nature brought their way. Constantly living in fear of losing someone they loved and always moving away before disastor struck. That was, until stele was discovered. The discovery of stele led to the making of stronger homes, for it was heavy and strong enough to withstand almost anything nature struck at it. Once the Pedestríanz had created a stable home, cities began to form. It was at this point that two powerful beings took notice of this small civilization. Psana (Goddess of Psychology) and Grimwal (God of Anatomy) became interested in the Pedestríanz because they were doing something they'd never seen happen before in this life-cycle. Immediately, Psana wanted to see what these people were capable of and asked her only son, Crisco, to give the Pedestríanz a fighting chance by making their lands fertile. Crisco agree'd to this and descended down to newly formed city on the first day and month of the year. Amazed by Crisco's physique, the Pedestríanz first tried to cook him; but later decided they should listen to him instead. And for the first month, Crisco taught the Pedestríanz to be agile and strong so they could properly hunt the beasts of the desert continent. By the end of the month, they were all well trained; then came the first Nulam. During Nulam, Crisco was restored of his God powers and would be able to transform the dry land into fertile soil so that plants could begin to grow. And slowly, he was able to transform a desert continent of savage people to a tropical paradise of a strong and intelligent race. This took 7.3 years.

So now, every Nulam, Pedestrianz honor the Gods with prayers and joyous fairs. And Rhelinz have taken over for Crisco, using this period to learn from the Gods so that they may continue to preach in Crisco's place during the following month.

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City: Gefficimlipis (Effi)

An island city just to the far East of Khazaron-Fin. The city crowns around the Islands tall Mount Ncala where at it's very tip is the Great Anja Goriz, an elegant place of worship built in honor of Crisco himself. Worshippers go there to pray not only to Crisco but to the many other Pedestrían Deities. The Temple is said to be the closest and easiest connection to the main Gods. There are no vehicles aloud in Gefficimlipis due to the praying Tuganz and Rhelinz. Vehicles can be loud and destructive, therefore, anyone who visits the island city must travel by foot and keep their voices at low levels. The buildings here are constructed of Pedestrían stele but is left unpainted to keep everything at it's most natural state. If you wish to shop, Gefficimlipis sells a variety of items from fish; fruit, to clothing made of Crisco-Yhorin, at the base of the mountain in it's Marketplace Caverns.

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What is: Stele?

Stele is Pedestrían Steel. It is much known to be far greater and better than any metal on Earth. As of today, Khazaron-Fin is still the only place in the world this metal is found. When found the metal looks much like a chrome transparent diamond and comes in a massive amount. It is quite a disgusting site if you ask me, so before we use this metal for anything we set it out in a harsh environment and let it rust for 7.3 years, precisely. When the metal is good and rusted it'll look much like a rusted tin can. It is, then, ready to be constructed into whatever we need it to be.

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City: Khazaron-Fin

Also known as Qril Mula (Blue City) is a Desert City that lies in the shadow of the northern Pedestrían volcano, Qhezlap, but also holds the only Cellibik oasis (fin). However, the Fin is so small its not even seen on the map and is known to be the only place that a Wilrumpik bush will grow. The city is rather large with tall Pedestrían Stele buildings which quite resembles that of a rusted tin box with a single coat of traditional dark blue paint on every building. Many men and women work in the Stele mines near the volcano because, other than fish (ghela), Stele is their main market and Pedestrían technology guarantees they will not upset the currently active volcano. Many people come here to watch the city change it's colors at sunset.

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What is: Crisco?

Crisco is one of Pedestría's most precious and valuable crops. It is often farmed in the more tropical regions but has not been unknown to grow in the desert as well. The Crisco plant is used in cooking, tailoring, bathing, and worshipping. So far, Pedestría's soil is the only soil to support this rare delicate plant.

And yes, Crisco is also the lard you pig-dogs cook in. But there is a significant difference between Fat American lard Crisco and Beautiful Pedestrían lard Crisco.

The Crisco served in the Americas is either animal fat or of some vegetable substance. They only lie and fool you into thinking it's actual Crisco.

Our Crisco is a plant of its own and grows on a farm. It is a much healthier, vitamin rich, fruit.

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What is: Crisco-Yhorin?

Crisco-Yhorin is a fabric made from Crisco-Yhor; the string leaves that grow around the edges of the Crisco plant. These leaves are both edible and fashionable. When a bed of these leaves soak in water (elswa) for 12 days and 15 nights they become very soft and are easy to be stomped into a fabric. After being stomped for 10 hours straight the water (elswa) is drained and the fragile remains are left to dry for 4 more days in the sun. At the 16th hour of the 4th day the Crisco-Yhor has become Crisco-Yhorin and is ready to be made into a shirt, dress, curtain, or blanket. The strong fabric is softer than cotton and smoother than silk; and is also cheap.

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What is: Conbhi?

A Conbhi is a religious robe worn by the Tuganz. Often the colours of a jagged Bronze and a slick oil Black, made from stained Crisco-Yhorin. The robe is tight-fit all over leaving not much freedom to move your legs but covers every inch of the body except for the feet and eyes. The feet are covered by Geizalz (sack shoes held on by string) made of the same fabric the Conbhi was made. From the Head of the Conbhi, black Crisco-Yhorin lace hangs down like hair and a stele (Pedestrían steel) crown wraps itself around the forehead and outlines the bottom of the eyes and the sides of the face.

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Drapez: What are they and How to recognize them.

A Drape, like a Rhelin, serves one of the many Gods but can channel messages from the Demi-Gods. A Drape is chosen by the Gods at birth, and mature much quicker than a common Pedestrían. They can lead a normal life of getting married; having children, and holding steady jobs. However, they cannot become a Rhelin or Tugan and they often choose to stay out of politics. You cannot tell the difference between a Drape and a common Pedestrían, but you can learn the where-abouts of a Drape easily from any citizen in any town.

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Rhelinz: What are they and How to Recognize them.

A Rhelin is a Priest who lives to serve only one of the many Gods. They stay in constant communication with a Tugan who channels out scriptures all day long. It is the Rhelinz job to record these scriptures and deliver them to their followers in neighboring towns and cities. It is illegal to stop or interupt a Rhelin because they are limited in time and must return to their High Temple during Nulam (A 2 week time period in between each month), during which time they will record during the days and pray for 3 hours of the night. Rhelinz often dress as they please to make their travels  more comfortable, so it is difficult to point one out right away; however, every Rhelin wears a silver chain with a symbol of the deity they represent.

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Tuganz: What are they and How to recognize them.

A Tugan (Monk) serves only the Gods and, in favor, are well protected for it. Not even the Highest Coucilmen of the Pedestrían Government can interfere with what they do, say, or study. They reside in the 4 High Temples of Pedestría; Tsaunjoruk to the North, Anja Goriz to the East, Ywilcan to the South, and Ek'korz'ilv'an to the far West. Tuganz are in constant communication with the Gods. They pray all day/everyday; stopping only to eat, sleep, and use the goja (bathroom). It is through the Tuganz that Rhelinz learn their scriptures. A Tugan most commonly wears a Conbhi (traditional robe) of Bronze and Black, covering every inch of their body and revealing only their sharp hazel eyes.

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This is a highly advanced digital painting of Pedestría. As you can see, it easily pin-points water, tropical land, desert land, and all 6 of Pedestría's volcanos. As of the current, there are only 2 active volcanos.

It's amazing what technology can do.

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This is what your books should have in them. You see the continent that lies on the equator just West of the Americas. Yes, that would be the grand and beautiful country of Pedestría.