SNAPPED LIKE LEAVES ‘NEATH BOOTS, ( RED EYED, EVERY BREATH A HICCUP BETWEEN STOLEN WORDS ) Hifumi, Hifumin, HE ( for everything he is still now, guts spilt on the stage ) bent - knee and desperate. HE’S ON HIS KNEES NOW, TOO, IN FRONT OF JAKURAI who sits calmly in his chair, staring down at his small form as it trembles like a fucking glacier splitting away from it’s mass.
Me, MYSELF, I, I, I, I, I, I DON’T WANT TO TELL YOU —
LIKE HE THOUGHT HE COULD KEEP IT SEPARETE, how he compartmentalises his reactions ( KITTEN, KILLING, CAUGHT, COFFIN ) into separate sections of his mind, hands clasped TIGHT around each word chosen perfect per persona; LIKE SACCHARINE SWEET, fizzing on his tongue like champagne — but it’s cheap and tastes like sick now, back up through his throat as his arms curl into themselves pulled tight around his shaking form. The suit crinkles.
Like chipped armour; what could it protect?
HE FUCKED IT UP, HE FUCKED IT UP, is he going to kick him out? Make him leave? Could he stand to lose another place he belonged? — COULD HE STOMACH OPENING UP LIKE THAT?
“ I didn’t mean to, I — ”
The night is young but he is spent. Blood and dirt scrape his cheek which is all he has left to BOUND HIM right here to this moment. The battle is over and they have fought well, DESPERATE, determined. They will be champions once more - for what choice do they have this time ?
He is pulled once more from his thoughts by ANOTHER PRAYER at his feet, tears of the begging coating his boots. He is no longer a killer but the scene is the same - a man begging for his life. A man about to be struck down where he stood. Sweat bleeds like HOLY WATER on furrowed brow as he stares down at the man from where he sits, THRONED LIKE A GOD. He is about to open his lips to speak, throat still searching for what words to follow when he is silenced by his own name. Never had he heard it spoken like this off golden tongue. This wasn’t the usual breakdown, but why should he be surprised? They were all feeling it out there. Something changes under pressure - something different had become of matenrō on this night.
❝ Hifumi-kun, please. You have to breathe - ❞ words trail off as he recalls the words that Hifumi had cried in front of millions out there. Every word the doctor and Doppo had breathed had been true but it was clear this one hit FAR CLOSER TO HOME than Hifumi had intended. He reaches out, palm searching for somewhere to land and falling to the male’s shoulder. No, not quite. Shifting forward, the man’s touch moves and guides along the curve up to Hifumi’s cheek. The other hand reaches and mirrors himself until he is cupping the trembling host’s face within his HOLY PALMS.
❝ Listen to me, you have to breathe. You are having a panic attack. Whatever happened out there - that doesn’t matter now. I won’t let you sink. ❞ I will not let him down into himself. I will reach into the seas and pluck icarus out feather by feather until he is safe - until he is whole.
