I’m a firm believer that sometimes when you’re in a relationship you don’t see it for what it is, and that applies to any type of relationship, familial, romantic or platonic.
Sometimes friendship grows toxic or one-sided, your family treats you like a child even when you’re a matured adult, or a casual acquaintance evolves into something deeper and turns romantic. But something has to happen to make one or both parties step back, reassess it and come back with new perspectives.
This absolutely applies to Colin and Penelope They’ve been in each other’s lives for so long that in many ways they still see each other exactly the way they did when they first met as kids.
Their relationship began for Colin with Penelope being his sister’s friend who became such a fixture in the Bridgerton household that he began to see her like another sibling or cousin, she has been in his life forever as an honorary Bridgerton.
For Penelope, Colin has always been confident, outgoing and kind. He’s the only boy she has felt comfortable around because she’s shy and her interactions with men have been extremely limited. We never see her speak directly to her own father, just as she warms to her cousin Jack but she discovers he’s untrustworthy and gentlemen at parties don’t even acknowledge her.
The only male who has consistently been in her life and proven to be kind to her or paid her any positive attention is Colin. Of course she has always adored him, he’s practically the only man in the world who has ever acknowledged or been good to her.
But hearing what Colin said and realizing that he isn’t perfect, forces Pen to take him off the pedestal she’s always had him on and consider what will become of her if she continues to exist in her fantasy that Colin will miraculously love and choose her as his wife. She knows she has to meet more men and she’s going to focus on stepping out of her comfort zone (in the shadows) and into the light.
We know Colin & Pen have grown closer since writing to each other because that’s how their friendship actually developed. Prior to that Eloise had claimed Penelope and she and Colin were far less familiar, it’s clear in how once Polin are more friendly, Eloise keeps interrupting their conversations and claiming Penelope to herself.
It’s important to note that Penelope basically bestowed upon Colin all the positive attributes of the men of fantasy, possibly from romantic novels and books she’s read and maybe that’s why Portia told her to stop reading because it would confuse her thoughts. Because Colin was still very much just a young boy in season 1 and hadn’t actually cultivated in himself what Penelope sees in him. She saw his potential and not who he truly was but we come to find out that her image of him is what he aspires to be.
That’s why Colin mentioned how Penelope’s letters encouraged him, that’s why he’s different with her in season 2. Penelope’s letters were likely full of positivity, she built up his confidence so he could be the man she sees when she looks at him.
Keep in mind Colin is young and desperately wants to be a man with purpose, the sort of man his father was (but his father died when Colin was like 11 so he doesn’t know how to become the man he wishes he was. So Colin has been doing his best to get by on flirting and charm but he wants to be taken seriously now.
So while on his travels, away from his family and his mother, relying on himself and free to act as an adult for the first time, he chose adventures and trying new things and spends time thinking about who he is. Cue Penelope’s letters and positive image of him as a brave, heroic, capable gentleman.
We know that when he left town he was broken hearted and his confidence had taken a major hit. Penelope’s letters were vital in getting him through something difficult that was also humiliating. It’s begun to dawn on him that she isn’t just his sisters friend, she is someone who genuinely cares about him, understands, respects and appreciates him for all the things that other people might mock, overlook or take for granted. That is why she’s special to him. It’s the same reason he’s been special to her, she thinks he sees her, and to an extent he does. But the way he sees her has not changed enough by season 2 which is why he has her in the friend zone box.
Penelope taking herself out of his life by ignoring his letters and/or distancing herself from Colin to focus on her own future is the closest thing that she as a young woman, can get to Colin’s travels because it’s her way of getting to know herself so she can become the woman she aspires to be.
This is Penelope’s time for self reflection and figuring out what she really wants and needs which is going to change everything because she has been surrounded by a lot of negativity. Sisters who pick on her for having bad skin or being chubby, a mother who’s constantly silencing her and hasn’t put any effort into helping her attract suitors.
Taking action that will change her life for the better is an extremely important step for Pen. But old habits are hard to break and she’s made herself small and quiet for so long she is bound to struggle with confidence. So where she helped Colin through letters because her writing is the way she expresses herself best (and the only way most people actually seem listen to her), Colin will help her in person once he’s had enough time and distance to realize how much he wants and needs her in his life.
Once Penelope finally embraces the confident woman she has become deep down (the one who comes out in her writing), more and more people will take notice of how remarkable she is. Because at her best Pen is kind, funny, loyal, and she protects the people she cares about.
Colin is going to be smitten once the more matured, confident man he has become over the last several months finally meets the mature, confident, emboldened woman Penelope has become. And these two newer versions of Penelope and Colin are perfect for each other.
