So, we are 2 weeks away from Christmas and I have already broken up with my boyfriend.
I also do not have any potential job prospects, I am having a character interview at my beauty school next week, to see if I will be selected as a fully funded student by the government.
I am in this limbo of sorts and I am nor upset or overly thrilled about things. I guess I could just say that I am contented, despite this looming expectation from my parents to make it on my own and to get me off their backs financially (which I totally understand and respect, its just that I feel like I don't measure up to the career goals that I initially studied for). I am like quite literally fearing going back to work at the spa I got hired at on Nov 1, prior to my surgery.
Idk why I feel like I won't be about to measure up to the expectations of this spa and the clients. I have a lot of concerns about my abilities and how much I can tolerate with regards to my spine etc. I am so damn fearful of that coming back. Yet, I am so thankful and happy that I am feel of the pain that I have felt for over 3 years.
I also got a new keyboard and its soo thocky and i am in love.
I remember a lot of people bitching about this in the book (and then later the movie). For me, though, best representation of depression, as it affects me anyway, that I've ever seen. Days pass and they're just. Blank. They may as well just not have happened at all.
I don't like giving Meyer credit for much but I'll give her that.
Chapters: 39/39
Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Luna Lovegood/Theodore Nott, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley
Characters: Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, George Weasley, Ron Weasley, Neville Longbottom, Parvati Patil, Luna Lovegood, Daphne Greengrass, Theodore Nott, Hannah Abbott, Blaise Zabini
Additional Tags: Forced Marriage, Ensemble Cast, Post-War, Population Law, HEA, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Eventual Romance, Fluff and Angst, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Panic Attacks, Pregnancy, Eventual Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Minor Character Death, Magical Pregnancy, Fertility Issues
Series: Part 1 of Remember Us As War
Summary:
Following the devastation of the Battle of Hogwarts, The Wizarding Population Growth Act is put into effect. All witches and wizards will be matched with their most compatible partner. Failure to comply will not be tolerated. Survival is key.
Hermione reminds herself of this. Survival. She can fix this, if only she can survive. The war has made this a task she is equipped for. Marrying Draco Malfoy will hardly be the worst thing she's ever endured.
Delve into Ashleigh’s heart-wrenching experiences with love and loss, showcasing her resilience as she rises from the wreckage of heartbreak to embrace a brighter future.
Ashleigh stood on the sun-soaked shore of Grand Cayman, the gentle lap of cerulean waves against the sand a familiar comfort. At 32, she was aware that, despite the breathtaking beauty surrounding her, her life was a tempest cloaked in sunshine. The island, with its quaint streets and gossip lines longer than the coast, felt like both
sanctuary and prison.
Born with a hand deformity that led to the amputation of her finger as an infant, Ashleigh had learned early on the weight of difference. The scars of childhood, stitched with threads of trauma and inadequacy, wove a tapestry she couldn’t escape. Her charming blue eyes, often a reflection of longing, spoke volumes of battles fought within—against body image issues that ran deep, fueled by societal expectations and her father’s
disdain.
Her father, a miserably proud man, never missed an opportunity to remind Ashleigh of her flaws. He often receded into silence, leaving her mother—a hard-working woman striving to keep their modest home afloat—to face the world’s harshness alone. Ashleigh’s heart ached for the love she’d never known, feeling as though she was
forever in someone else’s shadow. Her mother’s long hours meant Ashleigh often felt like an island unto herself, navigating the rocky shores of her existence amid emotional
neglect.
At sixteen, Ashleigh thought she had found solace in her first love, but the boy who held her heart turned out to be a storm dressed in sweetness. His jealousy morphed what felt like passion into prison bars. With each controlling demand, her spirit slipped further away, culminating in two devastating miscarriages that left gaping holes in her already fragile heart. The ache of loss, compounded by emotional manipulation, sent her spiraling into an abyss.
The final fracture came the night she learned that he had traded her affection for a bartender’s allure. Cheated on and abandoned, Ashleigh found herself flailing amid her heartbreak. It was a hauntingly familiar cycle of hurt and abandonment that led her into a dark night of the soul. She painted her pain with alcohol and fleeting encounters, hoping to erase the sting of betrayal, yet the numbness only deepened the scars.
Time in the Caribbean was convoluted; while it flowed gently around others, Ashleigh was left feeling like a buoy tossed by chaotic waves. There were moments of clarity and determination, when the sun broke through her fog of despair, but they always felt temporary. With each job she grasped at—be it serving tables or trying to use her beauty degree—the shadow of her past loomed larger than her aspirations. Each encounter weighed her down, reminding her of how heavy the baggage of trauma could be.
Yet amid the tumult, a flicker of hope ignited within her. Conversations on the beach with her cousin, moments spent watching the sun rise over the horizon, sometimes helped to illuminate the dark corners of her mind.
She learned—albeit slowly—that her flaws didn’t define her worth and that survival was not synonymous with happiness. With each wave that crashed upon the shore, Ashleigh learned more about herself. The island whispered secrets of resilience despite its harsh realities and societal shortcomings. Her heart remained bruised but, with every endeavor and each experience, she crafted a narrative as fluid and fierce as the sea itself; a testament to
overcoming rather than succumbing.
Waves crashed, but Ashleigh learned to ride them. In the face of adversity, her spirit began to rise, one gentle swell at a time. She was more than her past; she was becoming everything she aspired to be—empowered, renewed, and ready to reclaim her story. As the Caribbean sun dipped into the horizon, Ashleigh watched, knowing that darkness would come, but so too would dawn.
And as she stood, toes buried in the sand, she whispered a promise to the wind—to keep fighting, to keep loving, and to let the island cradle her journey of resilience.
You're impossibly fast. And strong. Your skin is… pale white, and ice cold. Your eyes change color… and sometimes you speak like - like you're from a different time. You never eat or drink anything; you don't go into the sunlight. How old are you? Seventeen. How long have you been seventeen? …a while. I know what you are. Say it… out loud. Say it. Vampire.
I wasn't going to share this. I was going to squirrel it away in my den of fear BUT then I saw the @hurtcember prompt list and so now I'm saying fuck it. Happy Hurtcember my wicked little whump loving Azris freaks.
First time I'm using my tag list in MONTHS. If you find you don't want to be there anymore just lmk!
Holla at ya boi if you want on or off the Azris tag train : @talibunny30 @iftheshoef1tz @born-to-riot @fieldofdaisiies @aktrain @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @secret-third-thing @acourtofladydeath @pippsmcgee @youvereachedthenearest-lovergirl @baileybird71 @skyesayshi @yanny-77 @areyoudreaminof @unanswered-stars @futurehunt @ninthcircleofprythian @matrixsss @going-through-shit @c-starstuff-man0 @jules-writes-stories @the-darkestminds @krowiathemythologynerd @cauldronblssd @hieragalbatorixdottir @yourlazykitkat @hellolordling @climbthemountain2020 @lilah-asteria @shadowsandlint @acourtofbatboydreams @theeternalstruggle @christeareads @molcat07 @mistandmemories @neciebee @dusk-muse @chairofchaos @amalhe-kofee
inspo under the cut: 𝑆𝑖𝑔𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑢𝑚, Robert Ferri
