im allowed to call myself ugly but you are not allowed to agree with meÂ
I'm allowed to call myself dumb/stupid/an idiot but you are not allowed to agree with me

ellievsbear
One Nice Bug Per Day

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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

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Game Changer & Make Some Noise
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@petrus-peloponnesus
im allowed to call myself ugly but you are not allowed to agree with meÂ
I'm allowed to call myself dumb/stupid/an idiot but you are not allowed to agree with me
The above is a Wisteria bonsai. (Source)
Drag the Image
Itâs 6/26 you know what that means?
Happy Stitch Day!
aaaaaaaa
I have had this scheduled for today since July 3, 2014 in hopes to help celebrate Stitch Day. =]
how often on a daily basis do you wonder if youâre One Of Those Annoying People Who Cant Take A Hint and people only respond to you bc they feel obligated
when u rompin around with ya pot
when u romp too hard and get ya head stuck in the potÂ
when ya hubris is ya downfall and there is no releaseÂ
I love that whenever a chef on Cutthroat calls something âdeconstructedâ the judge knows something has gone horribly horribly wrong.
Code words to look out for:
Deconstructed - âSomeone stole a crucial ingredient or I just plain forgot to get it in the pantry.â
My [insert matriarchal family memberâs] recipe - âThis is nothing like what itâs supposed to taste like Iâm so sorryâ
Truffle oil - âIâm an idiot with no taste budsâ
Chili sauce - âIâm an idiot with dead taste buds and think Sriracha gives it authentic Mexican/Asian flavorâ
Perfectly - âI might as well go home right now.â
My real competition is [insert male competitors while overlooking female competitors] - âIâm an asshole about to get his ass handed to him by a woman.â
[Ethnicity]-inspired: âIâll just dump a bunch of Sriracha in it and call it a day then wonder why the Mexican chef beat me in an enchiladas round.â
Fun Fact! On his recent Eat Your Science tour, Alton told a story about how Sriracha is BANNED from Cutthroat Kitchen because a chef used in in a dessert described as âdrizzled with a white chocolate sriracha glaze.â
Oh god there is so much wrong with that
Do you remember the episode where a chef just straight up squirted it all over his dish straight from the bottle? I was shouting at my tv it was so embarrassing
"My real competition is [insert male competitors while overlooking female competitors]" - *is assessing the situation rapidly to figure out what the fuck is going on and has decided that yes, in fact, of the male competitors IS their real competition.* Just because the woman chef didn't make the top slot in their fucking bingo book based on first impressions doesn't make them an asshole or sexist. The competitors are all on fairly equal ground in order to be on the damn show and they don't know jack shite about each other to begin with. Or maybe they do and this person knows the other dude from experience. Who fucking knows. Fuck off.
Reblog if you don't have a girlfriend or boyfriend.
1.7 million ppl are single
1.8 million
1.9 million
2 million
ANONYMOUSLY MAKE ME BLUSH
Go ahead. Do your worst.
this is either gonna be a terrible decision on my part or nothingâs gonna happen haha
Iâll only post the successful ones.
Please do I need to feel wanted right now even if Iâm not
A 911 Operator Warning You to Stay Safe
Story by fbis-most-unwanted/reddit
Itâs kind of a running joke in my office that I always get the weirdest calls, and itâs true. One of the more interesting ones I got was from a drunk guy who meant to call the cops and was trying to file a noise complaint about his own party. While some of my calls can be pretty strange, theyâre usually fairly tame. Iâve been pretty lucky because I havenât had too many disturbing or sad stories to tell from my years working as a 911 operator. If youâre looking for something like that, I can point you to several of my colleagues because unfortunately, thereâs no shortage of those in this industry.Â
Keep reading
WOW. OKAY. HIT ME RIGHT IN THE FEELS.
âhe isnât touching the floorâ
âHE ISNâT TOUCHING THE FLOORâ
WHAT IS THIS
Sorry to ruin your night, folks!!
Iâm sorry? What the fuck? Is this real??
GODDAMMIT ITS ONE IN THE MORNING HERE I WAS JUST GONNA GO TO BED :(
reblog if women with swords
So I was looking for a mug cookie recipe without brown sugar online (Iâm out of brown sugar, okay?) and found this extremely enthusiastic review
What Really Went Wrong Between Iron Man And Captain America.
Almost every one of these still makes me on capâs side
Literally all of these put me on cap's side
How dog breeders have âimprovedâ breeds over the past 100 years.Â
The basset hound never used to sit so low. The dog has suffered changes to his rear leg structure, has excessive skin, vertebrae problems, droopy eyes that are prone to ectropion and entropion, and excessively large ears.Â
The bull terrier used to be an athletic dog, but over the years his snout was mutated to be oversized and bending downwards, leading to respiratory issues. Many bull terriers have supernumerary teeth and are compulsive tail chasers and air biters owing to brain deformities.Â
The boxer now has a much shorter face with an extremely short snout. The hindquarters are also lower. Like all brachycephalic dogs, the boxer has difficulty controlling his temperature in hot weather, meaning they are prone to overheating and collapsing in the summer. The boxer also has one of the highest cancer rates among dog breeds and many modern day boxers suffer from seizures.Â
The english bulldog has evolved into a creature that suffers from almost every known disease. A kennel club survey conducted in 2004 found that they die on average at only 6 years and 4 months old. They cannot mate without human intervention, and cannot give birth naturally due to their giant heads. There is no such thing as a truly healthy bulldog.Â
The dachshund, at one time, used to have functional legs and necks for their size. Their backs and legs have gotten longer, chest jutted forward, and legs have shrunk to such proportions that there is barely any clearance between their chest and the floor. Obese dachshunds usually have to actually drag their bellies across the ground. Their risk for intervertebral disc disease - which can result in paralysis - is extremely high. They are also prone to achrondoplastic related pathologies, progressive retinal apathy, and problems with their legs and joints.Â
Pugs are the most inbred breed of dog in existence - an investigation carried out found that amongst the 10,000 pugs found in the UK are so inbred, the gene pool consists of the equivalent of only 50 individuals.  They are extremely brachycephalic, and suffer severely from all the associated problems - the folds in their face frequently get infected, they struggle to breathe (making snoring/snorting/huffing noises even without moving), they have high blood pressure, low oxygenation, often collapse and die in the summer or if allowed to overheat, dentition problems due to their skulls being so curled in, and perhaps most shocking - their double curled tail is actually a genetic defect, and in its most serious forms leads to paralysis and many dogs needed a wheelchair or being euthanised if this progresses. These dogs are usually culled if they fail to produce this âattractiveâ trait.Â
Healthy puppies that do not succumb to these ridiculous modern day breed standards are usually culled. One very heartbreaking example is the rhodesian ridgeback. The ridge is actually a genetic deformity - a mild form of spinal bifida - and puppies born without this ridge are healthy - but since the ridge is their namesake, healthy puppies are normally culled at birth and only those with noticeable ridges are bred from, thus passing the disability down to future dogs. Below is a ridgeback alongside a healthy, ridgeless dog.
3 to 4 million dogs and cats are killed every year because shelters are too fullâŚ. people are choosing to buy from breeders or shops instead of offering them a home.Â
Homeless animals outnumber homeless people by 5:1.Â
Only 1 in 10 dogs will ever find a permanent home.Â
25 PER CENT OF DOGS THAT ENTER SHELTERS ARE PUREBREEDS.Â
Please consider adopting a homeless dog. Please donât encourage breeding these animals when there are so many being killed every year. Breeding is a profit, not âjustâ a hobby, and even if you think your breeder is reputable, they are still churning out puppies into a world where pets are seen as disposable.Â
This post is EXTREMELY important and I want all of you to read it.
NEVER buy a dog. Adoption should be your only option.
THIS. EVERYTHING IN THIS POST IS GOLD. YOU FUCKERS READ UP
Do not buy a dog from a breeder. A dog is not the living equivalent of a designer bag. Adopt a dog. Stop supporting the business of genetic mutilation for aesthetic.
I donât care if this isnât my blog aesthetic, you shouldnât either. Please please PLEASE ADOPT!!!!! IF YOU TELL ME ABOUT YOUR NEW PUPPY THAT YOUÂ âBOUGHTâ I WILL FUCKING PUNCH YOU!
Adoption is seriously the best. Plus foster if you can.
I am truly horrified. And the fact that pugs are super inbred does not surprise me, you can see it in their faces :O
I tried to pass this up but I just I canât. Breeding is not inherently bad. Ignorance is bad. Having no KNOWLEDGE is bad. Someone adopting a puppy from a shelter with no information or knowledge or education about dogs or dog training is just as harmful as someone who buys from a breeder with the same lack of knowledge.
You know who depends on breeders? Service dogs. Service dogs bred and raised to HELP people who NEED it. So go on and punch me in my fucking face for researching for TWO YEARS in the right breeder and BREED for my disability. Go on and punch me in the face for spending the next FOUR years making sure sheâs trained right and healthy and actively helping OTHER people find their right dog for them be in adoption or breeding.
Breeding is NOT the problem. Ignorance is. Lack of activism is. You really want to battle this shit??? Get fucking involved. Join the AKC and the breed clubs, push for more strict breeding regulations, push for healthier codes, push for the codes that decide what the dog breed standard is changes. Make a fucking difference in the community instead of standing back and judging because you know what DOESNT end up in shelters? Dogs from reputable breeders. from breeders who spend their every dime to keep their dogs safe and healthy and that they do not breed until they know these puppies have homes and if they DONT they keep them.
Are there problems in dog shows and the AKC?? Hell yes. But standing on the side lines complaining wonât DO anything. You donât like the breed guidelines? HELP CHANGE THEM. Because dog shows and SERVICE DOGS and breeders arenât going anywhere but helping change how they are raised or judged in dog shows CAN change.
Also to think that adopting has no issues is ignorant as well. ANYONE can adopt a dog. You know how many irresponsible people just adopt dogs? How many horrible shelters out there are there? How many people adopt then just send them back? How many get a dog with no knowledge or a puppy then just stick the dog outside?
There is no one solution fits all- actually there is! Itâs called spreading knowledge (like the OP post of breed standards) but also getting INVOLVED. voting, being apart of the community, pushing people to learn and if they want to adopt to help make sure they are ready and if they want to get one from a breeder to find one who does it correctly.
Knowledge is the solution. Not shaming someone who buys from a breeder.
Me and my bred-SERVICE DOG thank you.
^ Thatâs important!! Buying a bred dog isnât inherently âbadâ, I donât think that was the intended vibe of the original post.
For a lot of people, buying a certain breed is the best way to purchase a dog whose temperament etc. will be best suited to their lifestyle and often, dogs purchased directly from a good breeder will never see the inside of a shelter.
I think the point is not to buy designer breeds, and to be aware of the history and current standing of the breed youâre looking into. If the dog youâre interested in suffers from one of the atrocious aesthetic deformities, reconsider, or look around for those blessed breeders that are trying to revive the historical founders of the breed by introducing other breeds to their stock to try and breed out this laundry list of problems. A good breeder should always be striving for a healthier, sounder dog with no health issues - not just to meet the AKCâs ridiculous standards.
The message here is to do your research, and ask your prospective breeders a million questions. Some of the harmful mutations arenât as glaring as flat faces and short legs, like the flopped ears of the scottish fold cat or a pugâs curled tail. -shakes everyone- Yes, please, for the love of all things adopt a shelter dog if you are able - especially the older dogs, and not just the cute floppy puppies. But breeders arenât necessarily the problem, its the backyard breeders, the one-time âoh our dog is so cute and so lovely wouldnât it be fun for the kids to see puppies growing up!â owners, and the asshole guys who are so insecure in their manliness that they canât neuter their dogs that are the problem.
The âI am a piece of shit and nobody will ever love meâ factoid is actually a statistical error. You are actually are fantastic and infinitely worthy of peopleâs company. Â That person you used to care about, who taught you to hate yourself by abandoning you, is an outlier and should not have been counted
this is the greatest and most positive use of a meme that i have ever seen.
Dear followers who work with merchandise, retail, and loss prevention...
âŚhere are some tips that shoplifters share amongst each other. You can find a bunch of more tips under âliftplayâ and âfive finger discount,â they make it so easy to get caught by sharing their secrets online. Have fun catching entitled brats <3
IâM DOING BIRTH CHARTS AGAIN!
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Hey guys pretty please consider buying a birth chart! Iâm trying to pay for college and every purchase helps! Email me with the subject line âIRON MANâ for 10% off your birth chart package ;-)
WARNING to anyone planning on LEAVING THEIR HOUSE
The outside has unfriendly people, as well as a gigantic ball of fire in the sky. In addition, you may sometimes encounter a bird or an unpleasant smell.
Posting this because THERE ARE NO POSTED WARNINGS when exiting your home.
SIGNAL BOOST THE HELL OUT OF THIS.
False - the "gigantic ball of fire in the sky" no longer exists. Instead, have fun dealing with the electromagnetic radiation produced by the gigantic fusion reactor it was replaced with.