golem girl, maid of clay

polyam autistic jewitch librarian, transbian. Not remotely attracted to people who aren't attracted to trans women & nonbinary folks. Born 1983. Social Justice Necromancer. Transformers, webcomics, cartoons, superheroes, manga, many animals. Call me Rainbow, or Bow.

[ayellowbirds]

state of the system, edited May 14 2025

There's been a LOT of additions to the system, over the past few months! A mix of stress, and developments in our comfort being ourselves due to internal work.

2024 really seems to be the Year of the Fictive for us. Welcome, Harley and Scarlet!

@autobots-one-half: the Wreckers subsystem: Arcee¹, Concord, Hammerdown, Horsepower, Miranda (1/7/2025), Motocross (12/31/2024), and Mayday

@bakugirl: Addison, she/her. Explosive trans girl fictive, don't call her 'Kacchan'. First fronted 11/16/2024

@barkbarkspark: Spark, she/her. Some kind of hyperactive shapeshifting electric canid. First fronted 4/6/2025.

@chateau-maupertuis: Fenix, Sienna, Rey (short for Reynartine), any pronouns. Pansexual fox of many names.

@decepticons-one-half: Night Mare (she/her, 1/9/25) and Bludgeon (he/him or she/her, 2/28/25), transforming Jusenkyō-cursed crossover fictives.

@dzhukhe: Kerys Freeman*, it/its or she/her. Pansexual lumin gyne.

@exit-running: Lina Inverse, she/her. Bisexual female fictive, first fronted completely by surprise on May 17th, 2024.

@faxedstar: Shavit MiBeyt-Halley, co/com or they/them. Asexual nonbinary coronis.

@flowerhurricane: Lita, she/her. Human woman, biromantic asexual. First fronted 2023/12/6

@fraylin: Aidel*** RS, she/her. Near-human woman, possibly bi? bisexual.

@galaxycrowned: Taylor Barzelay, she/her. Transbian superheroine fictive, first fronted properly on May 29, 2024.

@golemgirlgoop: Rainbow Taylor, it/its or she/her or they/them. Lesbian demigirl golem, median subsystem.

@gothamgirlie: Harley, she/her. Fictive of nonspecific source media. Don't talk to her about the 2019 cartoon.

@greatveitshark: Veit, she/him or he/her. Sharp-toothed aro-ace genderweird. First fronted 3/17/2025.

@gymnosome: Sera (short for Serafina) and Ocean, the Café Sub-Subsystem. Both she/her fictives; a butch lesbian and shoregender trixensexual demigirl ghost. Fronted for the first time May 19 and 20.

@hebephage: Ran, she/her bisexual kijin, fictive² median subsystem.

@juratempestfederation: Astra, she/her oni fictive. First fronted 3/24/2025.

@luckyno13: Sophie/Sophia, she/her small anthro cat. First fronted completely by surprise on April 6, 2024.

@neveyleh: Miriam** "Bone" Bowen, any pronouns. Genderfluid human (corpse), sexuality is "yes".

@notarockyet: Maia, young (60 years old, older than our body) troll maiden. Fronted briefly in the mornings for a few weeks of February 2024 before properly spending time in front March 7th. She/her.

@okonomiyakimeansiloveyou: Raleigh Westchurch, he/him or she/her (alternating) bigender bisexual fictive. Made himself known for a while before she properly took front February 5th of 2024.

@playplayplayletsplay: Sitari, she/her. Magical girl fictive puppy. Fronted properly for the first time on June 8th, 2024.

@prithilla: Priscilla/Priss, she/her porcelain doll full of questionable ooze. First fronted 10/13/2024.

@responsiblyirresponsible: Justine Wakely Tylor, she/her. Trans woman fictive, sexuality is a noncommittal hand-wave. First turned up in headspace a while after Aidel, but only recently started fronting for more than a few minutes.

@sungsingsanguine: Scarlet, she/her. Heroic!Himiko fictive heavily inspired by the fanfic Adalheidis but with some notes of other sources.

@ultra-intergalactic-cybot-g: Marina Liteyears, she/her synthetic fictive. Turned up 7/12/24.

@urukuduk: Sylviandrine Augustina Attercop, fae/faer or she/her. Bisexual woman, orc/halfling mix.

@worlds-slowest-cheetah: Chroma, she/her cheetah woman. First fronted 4/16/2025

¹: I turned up 8/15/2023! I was around in the background of headspace for a while but nobody was sure who I was until I pushed to front.

² Ran has been hiding in-system for a while (we're not entirely sure how long), but only actually fronted for the first time on 9/9/23

*: Kerys didn't have a surname, so it asked its husband Haskell for his. This caused Haskell to briefly bluescreen, it was cute as fuck.

**: Fuck yeah! That's me, I'm not new but the realization that I'm my own damn person is.

***: Aidel is a fictive but felt anxious about using the name she had in her source media since this body is of European/Mediterranean Jewish ancestry and she's from an anime/manga/LN franchise. She showed up completely unexpectedly on December 2, 2022.

[eroscestlavie]

What do you guys do for work. Job share time. I want to know

[spiny-ant]

If you notice there's less lightning bugs around then there was when you were young, you aren't going crazy. Lightning bugs/fireflies are becoming endangered!

Above is a video from one of my favorite youtubers, Ze Frank, that goes into more detail.

Lightning bug conservation is not being funded, so the Xerces Society for Invertebrate Conservation requires donations to further their research. The aim is to establish lighting bug sanctuaries and begin habitat restoration efforts.

Studying these little guys has done so much for us in many different fields including medicine! It's important that lightning bugs are protected so future generations can experience that magical feeling of sitting in a field surrounded by little lights.

Firefly Conservation | Xerces Society

Fireflies are cherished, but they are also declining. Based on assessments published on the International Union for Conservation of Nature’s

Please consider donating! Every bit helps🐝

Reblogs are appreciated!

[spiny-ant]

Summertime is approaching, prime lightning bug season. Bringing this post back because there's still work to be done! The Xerces Society does more then just protect lightning bugs, but butterflies and bees too!

They also have a free PDF guide on how to make your yard/property/garden as firefly safe as possible!

Conserving the Jewels of the Night | Xerces Society

Fireflies are some of our most celebrated insects. They have immense cultural, biological, and economic importance and are important compone

Long live the fireflies!

[viviprotrudes]

I didn't have the language for it back then but I did mention to a transmasc person I knew that the "trans inclusive swim times" needed to be specifically stating that Trans Women and Transfems were overtly welcome because we so often exclude ourselves from trans spaces for fear of being perceived as predators (through the internalizing of systemic rejection of transfeminine people even within queer spaces) and they were very stunned and aghast because it put into context the refusal of 3 transfems they invited to the swim time and how there was only 1 transfem in the like 30 people that showed up and said transfem was the one that hadn't refused their invitation. I said this to them after their friend was asked to leave the "trans inclusive swim time" which obviously contributed to this sort of invisibilized yet evident dynamics description

They talked about it to the events organizers and said event organizers essentially told my acquaintance that "this is a space for people to feel safe, and that they will prioritize those who state feeling uncomfortable in the presence of others over said others" and their heart fucking sank and they made a stink about how this was horrifying twerf and bioessentialist rhetoric. They were banned from the "trans inclusive swim times" and so was their transfem friend. Not because they were transmasculine, but specifically because they were not okay with the fact that some fuckass twerf in an entire group was given so much power as to manage to exclude any and all transfems from the "trans inclusive swim times"

Idk. I'm tired. I'm sad. I'm hungry, and I'm thinking. I am too exhausted to be angry.

[synthalest]

ten thousand years infinite income every disabled girl 1 billion dollars a year

[depsidase]

[mossworth]

Guys, queers. Specifically my fellow queers.

I work at a library. We do this thing where, every so often, we weed the collection. It hurts to see books go, but it's necessary to make sure there's room in the library for new materials.

I have seen so much support for the library in text, and I've seen folks pass around those beautiful "queer your library" flyers. Keep doing that. That's great. Nothing wrong with that. But you HAVE to turn your words into action. We MUST remember to actually go to our local organizations and libraries and actually, with our own fucking hands, interact with these materials we want to see more of.

My branch is medium-sized for a library, maybe a little small. We don't have as many materials as I'd like, but we have fundamentals. Tell me why, even with all the verbal support I've gotten from my local community for the library as a resource for our LGBT+ community, every single trans biography and a good chunk of our vaguely queer theory books were on the list. This isn't a scheme to take the books off the shelves, it isn't another bigoted American governmental push. The only thing we look at when we weed is how long it's been since the last time the item was checked out.

Three years.

No one in my community interacted in any meaningful way with the few books on trans life and history we physically had on the shelves for three fucking years.

I promise you the materials you want and need are there, but this isn't a horde. This isn't a static safety net. You have to use them. You MUST use them or, in the future, maybe in three years, they *won't* be there anymore.

This isn't a vague post, there's no one person I'm hinting at or calling out. I'm not even talking directly to anyone who's directly in my line of sight. I just want everyone to hear this. Big library, small library, whatever. Doesn't matter. Please, we cannot be losing our shelf visibility like this.

[alanfromrochester]

I work in a different library and can confirm, it's a decision based on popularity not censorship

we're big enough to have lots of shelf space but still have the problem on a different scale. We do have a back storage room rather than completely getting rid of some things, but having to ask for that might be a barrier for sensitive subject matter and prevent people from casually stumbling across something of interest

[paintedpigeon1]

Yep. Different library worker here, we weeded adult non-fiction recently bc it's most rarely used and we needed to clear a bookshelf of space, and there were a decent number of queer books on the list. Thankfully not all of them, but some (we had a lot lol). Our criteria is also no borrows in 3yrs. I can't borrow the whole list by myself. I do try to get these books in, and the local authority are happy to buy them, but we need space for new books every so often and we can't keep everything forever! If you want them, you have to use them!

(incidentally, the whole list was 35 pages long, which... please borrow the books you want people)

[qbdatabase]

I didn't have time to comment the first time I reblogged, but I can add now:

I'm also a librarian and queer books are almost always cut first when we have to weed for space or prioritize new releases over old items because no one reads them

I will say, when I worked at a large downtown location, we had a "browsing card" that we would check out items we found taken off the shelf and left on a table, as an example of a book that had clearly been read, just not checked out by anyone

it's possible queer books do actually get a bit of unfair treatment in this regard because people may be nervous or outright scared to check them out onto an account with their name on it. so they get browsed at a much higher rate, but if a library doesn't have a specific system in place (or need for it) to count browsed items, then it looks like they aren't being used and they get weeded

for other librarians, a browsing card is a great idea if you have enough staff for the extra work / enough items left out to justify it

for patrons, check out queer books even if you don't read them! you're not lying or committing any type of fraud. you're keeping books on the shelf long enough for pride season when people are interested in checking them out again and for people scared to use their own accounts or who don't have library cards

for anyone nervous about using their library card, libraries do not keep search histories of what you check out!! this means even if the government does come back with a warrant, *wet farting noise* too bad! it doesn't exist!

so please check out queer books!

[vtothefun]

I have to wonder how often they aren't checked out because those in an exploratory period may not feel safe enough for them to go home with them, too. Kids, for example, or folks who have ended up in a het marriage that... Doesn't feel like it's quite right (or may be physically abusive).

[mossworth]

This is most definitely one of the causes of this. That's why it's so important for folks who *can* to *do*.

It feels like such a small thing, but all movements are made up of small things! We have this mindset that in order to get everything done, everyone must be doing their (or *the*) absolute best at all times. But not everyone can do the same things, to the same degree, with the same amount of productivity or success. Not everyone can; sometimes, they're the ones that need help. Sometimes people just need help.

This post is very much so intended for the people who can. I've seen a lot of replies from folks who say they don't have to (or don't think about) checking out or requesting queer books from the library specifically because they *can* buy them, can pirate them, or already have them in their house or on their computers or phones. But in instances like that, keeping these books in circulation is less for you and more for the people who can't. The folks who come to the library, who don't have access to internet--or even electricity--at home and would never--have never--been able to interact with this "ubiquitous queer community" we have here online who has made so many of these. materials so avaliable to the rest of us.

And... if I can be a little frank. Sometimes the hyperaccessibility of these materials online (through pirating, cheap e-book copies, etc) gives people a false sense of security. It implies that these things are an infinate resource, good for "When I get around to it".

And often, you won't. There's so much to read and so much to do. So much to download and so much to sit down and stare at for hours. That kind of mental scope puts books in people's hands (or phones), but never in their heads.

But the moment your favorite document archival site gets knocked offline for breaching copyright or your go-to mega corporate audiobook distributor decides it doesn't want "those" materials anymore, what's left? What did you download? What information did you internalize? Did you ever get around to it? If you did, great, but what good does that do for the person who didn't? Are you going to be the one to redistribute that information? Are you going to communicate it in the place of the author whose words are no longer publically accesible or, mostly avaliable, but only behind hefty paywalls and financial gatekeeping? How would someone else get a hold of it? How could they, if they wanted?

[vtothefun]

This is excellent info.

What are some good books to check out for those who can?

[mossworth]

Gosh... there's so many options. I wouldn't know where to start without knowing who I'm talking to and what they're looking for. What I can recommend is for folks to check out creators like @makingqueerhistory who have spent just a ridiculously beautiful amount of time collecting queer history and book lists! You'll find something in seconds reading their page.

Personal pitch: I liked the books Tar Hollow Trans and Gay Poems for Red States. Both great.

[makingqueerhistory]

I'm glad I was tagged in this because it means I can cosign (and also add a little nugget of info).

I live in a province that is currently trying to ban queer books from libraries, and as a library patron, this is terrifying. 95% of the books I read are from the library and a lot of them are way out of my budget to buy personally.

Making Queer History would not exist without the school library I skipped class in to write articles. It would not exist without my friends with library cards for their universities sharing them and getting me access to rare texts. I would not be able to read as much as I do without Libby and Hoopla. If I have ever given you a book recommendation, know that I likely got it from the library first.

I cannot overstate the importance of protecting libraries and checking out queer books. And I want to say thank you to everyone above for being as passionate as I am about queer books in libraries.

Love y'all <3

[the-grove]

Help improve two trans womens lives

Heya! My gf and I are gonna be purchasing a new bed. We both deal with chronic pain and the mattress we've had for years is not making things easier and maybe actively thinking worse. Thing is, we live pay check to pay check already, trying to adjust that cut back where we can, do things cheaper etc. But its hard when you are already struggling. But we are hoping that if we are in less pain and getting proper sleep we can maybe have more energy that can help with improving our lives. We will probably buying one via a payment plan but even the cheapest options are a bit over a hundred dollars a month that we would have to scrounge up. Some dear friends and family have already sent some aid to us, and we intend to use that to put a down payment for it. If you are willing to assist with the down payment or just generally help us pay it off/help with other life payments. I will be listing mine and my partners, kofi, paypal, venmo, and cash app. Feel free to use whichever system you feel safest/most comfortable using. If you can not assist, please consider re-blogging. Thank you. We intend to put the order in on may/25th, but I will probably reblog this often as we maybe paying it off for months to come. and we may even put this as as the pin on our blog.

Support Chisami

Queer Gamemaster looking to entertain!

Cash App: $rose2894 Venmo: @rose-sanchez-15 Paypal: https://paypal.me/rose2894?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US

[the-grove]

Hi we are still working towards paying this off.

But more importantly I'm about to head out to go to the E.R with my partners mother who is severely ill.

I have to leave my gf at home who is unable to cook for herself due to her physical disabilities. Our account is extremely low. We get paid tomorrow but we need to go to the E.R today. If anyone can help donate to assist with getting my gf some food. That would be much appreciated.

We may end up needing funds for car rides home depending on how long the visit takes as well.

Please consider helping or re logging if you can't.

[the-grove]

I've made it to the e.r

[tieflingkisser]

[lesbianslimefriend]

here's where to find it on windows 10

[the-tiny-dragons-tea-room]

Ugh, it was in mine. It's off now.

[the-tiny-dragons-tea-room]

IT GETS WORSE

I had to turn this off, but it's something that allows Windows and anyone using your device to generate text/images.

LOBOTOMIZE YOUR MACHINES

[marougus-the-dragon]

AI is a freacking plague, I share this for any windows user.

[mollyjames]

Dom Drop

[asahehskafah]

Adding prev's tags

[calamity-corner]

twerfs will try to convince you that they are the silent majority but that couldn't be further from the truth. they are extremely loud but they are also very much the minority of opinion. this isn't to say we don't live in a transmisogynistic world, but i think it's important to remember that a lot more people will be kinder and more well-intentioned than you think. even people who are uninformed or misinformed will at the very least try to be kind, because people in general want to be kind to each other. there is hope, even if it is not as loud nor spotlighted as the hate.

[calamity-corner]

i keep thinking about how one of my nurses after surgery, a cis woman, was so eager to talk to me about how she also got reconstructive vaginoplasty, to commiserate over the tribulations of the healing process, to be excited about the advances in medicine, to be happy for me. and she was older, and she slipped up occasionally with pronouns and deadnames, but she also always corrected herself and any other nurses who made the same mistake, it was honestly endearing and made me emotional how firmly and repeatedly she made note to everyone that while my chart said my deadname, my name was Zoe.

idk just. people in general will try to be kind, even if they aren't the most informed and even if they don't always do the best job. people tend to try. despite what twerfs want you to believe, you are not alone in a world full of people who will never accept you, your best options are not just a handful of people humoring you. people care, people love. and trans people have existed longer than any twerf has been alive, and nobody has succeeded in stamping us out. we'll always be here and we'll always be able to find happiness, family, friends, love, even amidst those who hate to see us happy. we're stronger than them, and most people would much rather us just be happy. even people who might not Get it tend to not Get blindingly intense hatred more. hate is easy and loud and makes one feel strong, but it's all empty lonely posturing. most people would rather just let us live.

[ashenmind]

truly breathtaking just how many series would be massively improved if the author gave a shit about women

[beedok]

The biggest issue I always have with the Backrooms stuff is that you never see any vending machines in there.

That's their natural habitat.

[ayellowbirds]

I remember there being a rumor at my college (which was literally across the street from PepsiCo) that there was one Coca Cola machine on campus, hidden in the basement of the Natural Sciences building. Never saw it myself, and I spent a lot of time in the underground passages....

[kayla-denker]

Hey, you, cis girl that's very (correctly) vocal about women being allowed to talk about their periods, do you include trans women in that?

I ask because every single time I've tried to talk about it to anyone that isn't a trans woman they get fucking angry. Which has caused me to have to just suffer in silence every single month. So I really relate to cis women when they talk about literally the exact same thing; being shamed by everyone around them their whole lives for talking about their periods, so they just suffer in silence every month as it negatively impacts their work and social lives. But I don't even feel like I can voice that I am literally dealing with the same exact thing because most of y'all react like you want to throw me in front of a bus for saying it, even those of you who act like your such big great transfem allies.

[kayla-denker]

I guess I'll take this opportunity to talk about trans women periods. The first thing any tme person thinks when they hear this is always "how can trans women have periods? They don't have uteruses!"

The answer is: the uterus isn't what causes your period, it is effected by your period. What causes your period and what causes trans women's periods is the same thing: the endocrine system.

HRT changes the sex of your endocrine system. Feminizing HRT makes it a female endocrine system, giving us a 28-day hormone cycle just like cis women. At the end of that cycle, the hypothalamus floods the body with prostaglandins. Those are what cause all but one of the period symptoms, because they make muscles inflame and contract. They are what make the uterus shed its lining, they are what cause intestinal cramps, they are what cause body aches, they are what cause headaches and migraines. The only period symptom not causes by the release of prostaglandins throughout the body is depression, and that is caused by your endocrine system simply not processing as much estrogen and from simply feeling like shit.

So, the only symptoms trans women don't get every 28 days is menstrual cramps, because yes we do not menstruate since we don't have uteruses. But migraines, depression, body aches, intestinal cramps, and the infamous "period shits" don't exactly add up to us having any better of a time. Except we have to pretend that we're fine and nothing is different because no one believes that we get periods, not even cis women.

"But you can't call it a period then because that refers to MENSTRUATION!" is another one I hear all the time. This is incorrect. You use the word "period" instead of just "menstruation" because it doesn't just refer to menstruation. It refers to a period at the end of the hormone cycle where we experience a host of symptoms. And not all cis women experience all of the symptoms that encompass the period. Not all cis women get migraines, or body aches, or have severe depression. If a cis woman gets a hysterectomy she doesn't menstruate either! In that instance she experiences an identical period to what trans women experience. Yet, I doubt you'd insist that cis women who've had hysterectomies don't have periods.

[nosimpincurly]

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

[catherinebunnington]

Reblog to materialize $250,000 in prev's bank account

[autogynophelia]

One of the ways transmisogyny manifests is in default-uncharitable interpretations of ambiguous meaning.

Last week I was at a meetup where I was the only transfem. I checked the groupchat when I arrived and there was a message from the organiser: "We have a newcomer called X, can you look out for him if you get there first?" I located X, introduced myself, sent a message to the chat say, "I have located X," and continued to talk to him until the organiser arrived. When the organiser arrived, she was not happy with me. It turned out my phone had autocorrected, "I have located X," to, "I had located X," which the organiser interpreted as me passive aggressively telling her that I had already done the thing she was asking about. Her conclusion: I was unreasonable and aggressive in responding to her reasonable request. My explaining what had happened didn't convince her otherwise.

A different occasion last week: in a local trans groupchat, a trans man sent a link to a drag event happening in our town. A few people said they were already going, some said they might go. Then a trans woman replied saying, "Thanks, but I don't really like drag." Her tone was immediately called into question. Her words were assumed to communicate: "I think you are a terrible person if you like drag," even though she never said that. Several non-transfems who had never even heard that drag might not be universally-beloved by everyone were upset to discover that fact. A trans woman simply saying she didn't like this thing became A Big Deal.

Meanwhile, at a different event again, a trans man told a group that he was straight and attracted to women, but he wouldn't feel comfortable bringing home an "AMAB woman" (yes he actually said that). It was quickly brushed over, and after he had left even trans women tried to defend him by saying "he probably didnt realise people would be offended" etc etc. In contrast to the examples above, he is not even aware that anyone was upset by what he said, never mind worrying about what consequences he might face.

Whenever I go to an event, I often spend the next 24-48 hours ruminating over every single thing I said to check if I did anything at any time that could even vaguely be construed as annoying to anyone. I have often put this behaviour down to severe anxiety, but I think I am realising that it is actually a rational response to a world where even the slightest social misstep could be blown way out of proportion and result in my later social exclusion. It's one of those things that existed long before I was aware of my own transness but while I was nonetheless transmisogynised by society, a crippling fear of the slightest imperfection that I assumed everyone else felt too but apparently they don't. I guess when other people go out of their way to smoothe over the damage your words or actions might cause, you don't need to stress about that damage because there are no consequences to it! It sounds very nice to be able to live like that.

[houndmother]

if you are a tme queer person holding an event, especially a dyke/sapphic one, you need to go out of your way to make sure that the trans women in your community know they are welcome. most of the girls i know assume we’re not.