Long Time Phantomart Employee

[phantomart-employee]

i hope y'all sell venison, or at least good red beef, because i cannot for the life of me find a tsuchigumo in my area and at this point i think big mammal musculature is probably the next best thing. godddddddd i need to sink my forciples into some animal protein and i already munched on my housemate last week... (he's fine don't worry i let him beat the hell out of me with a spatula after)

The urge to munch just can’t be denied, we DO have vension! In limited supply cause it is very popular.

However… my boss wants me to upsell you on human brains as we have a BOGO deal going on shortly due to our reopening

[phantomart-employee]

I just wanted to say I'm a big fan

I just use this to ramble, I completely forgot that was a thing that can occur on this site

[phantomart-employee]

High, local witch here. Can you tell your buddy's to stop shambling onto my lawn?

They keep smashing my pumpkins and every time my cat kills them its a real mess to clean up all that putrid flesh!

Witch, this is a Phantomart… I just work here, I might not even know who’s doing that

[phantomart-employee]

Many people believe zombies just straight up eat brains raw, but that’s not true! There are so many ways to prepare it, Zombie cuisine exists!

[phantomart-employee]

We missed you Phantomart employee. Glad to see you’re back to employment.

- Heartful Yo-Kai Onn-Lynne

Thank you! It’s a mix of emotions for me. I love having a job, but it’s just so diffident than it was.

[phantomart-employee]

Update on Patches:

Been spending a lot of time with him recently, got him a couple cat toys and he’s having a blast

[phantomart-employee]

Okay things are finally calming down… Is that the red kid? Nooooo I forgot about the red kid

[phantomart-employee]

His average looking bum brought ANOTHER kid, this one has orange hair and he is MUCH WORSE than the red kid

He doesn’t have a blaster but he causes a LOT of chaos I should do something about it, but he’s a friend of the red kid so I don’t know if I’m even allowed

[phantomart-employee]

Okay things are finally calming down… Is that the red kid? Nooooo I forgot about the red kid

[phantomart-employee]

This whole reopening situation is getting even more wild, KING DEADWARD just came in followed by so many reporters and paparazzi, they bought like half of our products

[phantomart-employee]

The store is soooooo different after reopening, a lot of yokai are just coming in to post it online! It’s good for business but I have to watch out for yokai just messing around the store

It’s frustrating but at least I have a job again

[phantomart-employee]

So the last months have been wild! As my fellow yokai may now, Supermanager got into heavy legal trouble for dealings with the mafia!

He was acquitted on all charges recently, but the Phantomart had to be closed for a bit while they looked for evidence… I was unemployed for a bit… But now I’m back!

[phantomart-employee]

Just to be clear: our phqntomart is not just a safe space for zombies, skeleton yokai are welcome to come whenever! This one regular introduced me to Skele-rock it’s pretty chill, a lot of rattling in it

[phantomart-employee]

Let’s go it’s SNOWING!!! I love building snowmen then chasing after them and getting to eat brainssss

So is the brains just some more snow? Yes.. but like shhhhhh don’t tell me that

[phantomart-employee]

The nerdy kid’s bunny friend would totally work for a mascot, I think I overheard him talking to Super Manager for a position working as mascot which is much better than that one chicken guy… that guy was SUPER shady

[phantomart-employee]

NEVERMIND DONT TRUST THE ASTRONAUT BUNNY, HE ALSO HAS A BLASTER

[phantomart-employee]

The nerdy kid’s bunny friend would totally work for a mascot, I think I overheard him talking to Super Manager for a position working as mascot which is much better than that one chicken guy… that guy was SUPER shady

[phantomart-employee]

Humans don’t have Zom-punk???? That’s crazy, it’s so good especially the bells in the background

[phantomart-employee]

“I asked AI”

Well I asked the creepy clown that keeps following me at midnight and he actually didn’t say anything he just kept chasing me