Phasmatis @phasmatis - Tumblr Blog

nightblood-deactivated20200815

I forgot how much I loved the morbid humor of a series of unfortunate events

hekacute-deactivated20141230

I went to high school with a kid who would only drink out of a baby bottle. He brought a large baby bottle to school every day. At first, we thought that he was using it to sneak alcohol or something, but he wasn’t. He would bring it filled with chocolate milk and then fill it up with Coca-Cola and Sprite during lunch. He’d buy a can of each and mix them together. Like I said, it was a large bottle.

I didn’t know the kid that well and I didn’t have any classes with him so I never really talked to him that much. I knew his name. His name was Kevin. Sometimes I’d see him at parties on the weekends. He still had his baby bottle. He would fill it with beer and rum.

He dated my sister’s friend, Emily, for a little while. I had known Emily for a long time. She had been a friend of my sister’s since they were five or six. They were really good friends. She spent a lot of time at our house for sleepovers and stuff. Sometimes she would pee the bed, but I never made fun of her for it. I think most older brothers would have loved the opportunity to make fun of their sister’s friend for peeing the bed and I think she really appreciated that I never mentioned it even though I definitely knew about it because after the sixth or seventh time, my parents started paying me to clean everything up instead of having to do it themselves.

I asked Emily why Kevin only ever drank out of a baby bottle and she said that she didn’t know. They had only been dating for a very short time at that point and she didn’t want to bring it up and offend him or anything. I asked her to tell me if she ever found out. They broke up right after that and I kind of forgot about it because Kevin stopped going to school. I don’t know if he transferred or dropped out, but I never saw him at lunch or any parties after that.

I hadn’t thought about him in a long time, but Emily happened to mention him while she was over at our house recently and I immediately remembered the baby bottle thing.

“Did you ever find out why he drank out of that bottle?” I asked.

“Oh yeah, he told me why,” Emily said. “He used it because he heard that babies that drink out of bottles for too long or drink sweet drinks out of them get really bad teeth problems. He wanted all of his teeth to go bad so that they would fall out and he would be able to fit a softball in his mouth. He said that he wanted to have the world record for being the first person to be able to put a whole softball in his mouth and he wouldn’t be able to do that with all of those teeth in the way.”

pluginduck

What the fuck did I just read

hethunders

i thought it was an emotional story

stepbaby

sweetpeete

me: *holds doggy* doggy: *is hold*

bopeep

i feel calm and at peace w the world

passingpleasantries

remember in 2006 when you accidentally hit the internet button on your flip phone and then you had to press end 40 times to keep your parents from paying for such a luxury

babypaintbrush

my mom just sent me this

babypaintbrush

he’s famous

pumpkinpiepuppy

Now this is quality entertainment

5-seconds-of-awkward-teenhood

Morgan and Garcia (part 2)

Rant Time:

Sometimes I get really frustrated because I agree with feminist ideals, but all the feminists I know post things I disagree with. Like yes, men and women should be held to the same standards with regard to what is deemed as “appropriate” clothing. But in my mind, that means everyone should be expected to keep their chests and reproductive areas covered no matter what their biological or identified gender is (with the exception being for breast feeding, obviously). And it’s not a matter of me sexualizing people, but from the fact that I’ve learned since I was a little girl where people aren’t supposed to touch you, and where it is inappropriate to touch others. So I’ve always assumed those places were taboo in general.

So basically, I’m hella prudish regardless of someone’s gender. It’s not a religious thing or something from a traumatic event, it’s just an association I made a long time ago: chest and underwear parts are taboo. I respect the opinions of others though, and I do think that if men are allowed to expose their nipples to the world, women should be allowed to as well. I just think everybody should keep all their parts wrapped up n’ cozy.

I don’t know how many other feminists have these ideals, but I figure it would be best to point out that there are many ways to aim for equality. You CAN be a feminist and still have conservative views on clothing, as long as your views are the same for all genders/sexualities/etc.

#feminism #really passive rant #it's ok to be a prude if you're not a jerk