→PIERRE HUGO BALLAND has managed to blow out NINETEEN candles to date. Pierre has traveled all the way from PARIS, FRANCE and was instantly noted as being THE PESSIMIST. Pierre has run away due to HIS ABUSIE PARTNER WHO FORCED HIM INTO UNHEALTHY DIETARY HABITS LEAVING HIM SELF-CONSIOUS WITH AN EATING DISORDER and is a carbon copy of LOUIS TOMLINSON.
"I think in the end I'm just sorry, it's all so cliche the lost teenager thrown in to a whirlwind of self loath and disappointment, constantly pestered by thoughts of my past and what I could have done to make everything better, and the guilt, oh the guilt, the wrenching pain of not being able to fulfill someone you love's needs, not being able to reach the standard they wished you were at. Leaving, guilty for leaving the people you held so close to your heart but you let slip out of your hands for another and now I'm here, and I've let both of the people who I held close to my heart drift away, or I suppose it's the other way around, this empty shell of me has drifted away, with the Pierre that everyone knows and loves locked away, chained up inside. There's always a reflection, one that feels the drawing of blood just as much as you do, when you're looking in the mirror and you're holding a gun to your head your reflection is ready for it as well, the only difference is, when you pull the trigger all that's left is you, the "you" that everyone else knows and your reflection goes away with you, although differently, it's body doesn't get buried under six feet of dirt, instead it vanishes, as if it were invisible. All I wish for is to be that relfection, the relfection that can feel the pain and heartbreak and other cliche things but not have to be burdend with the memory of your past and what you've done. So yes, I'm sorry. Sorry for this, sorry for that, sorry for the chain and the deadbolt and the lock with no key" - Pierre Grandet Balland.
We don't choose the life we live. We Hope it gets better, but it never does, we run away from the person we used to be - all we know is gone.
Meet Pierre Grandet Balland Son to Gareth and Marvella Balland. He was born in Passy A wealthy suburb found in the upper west side of Paris france. Pierre's upbringing until the age of seven was here in this residential area, thriving with old money, he was raised to be polite, well mannered and poised everything a parent could only dream of for their child. His parents were both of french decent although each could speak english fluently, this was of course helpful in both their jobs, his father; Garteh was a literature professer at St Dominque University and his mother; Marvella a renowned poet and literature reviewer. "ne pas prendre ce que aves acquis" or "don't take what you have for granted" a phrase which -while in France- Pierre had grown accustomed too. A phrase which after the first five times of hearing he decided to ignore and pity himself, He was only a child but he longed for freedom and fluidity, to not have things delivered to you but for the ability to go and get them. So when his parents had told him they were moving to London for work he was ecstatic, their backyard wasn't big and their house was incredibly shoddy but Pierre found himself having more fun riding his bike up and down his small street in this polluted city rather than the former. Although this city is where he met Nick, the man who had left him brutally scarred and with a distort self image his perspective of the place doesn't change, although paris holds an irreplacable place in his heart he likes to think of this as home too. At the age of seventeen he had began to see the negative aspects of his boyfriend of two years and tried on his own to run away, back to Passy. He was safe for a month before the whispy haired boy had found him, he didn't see the point in trying anymore, as far as he knew it; this would be his life forever.
And then the worst happens and just when you think you've hit rock bottom, you sink lower. You gnaw at the dirt and become buried in all you've become.
He remembers it clearly, it was a saturday; he was only fifteen at the time and his friends had managed to sneak him in to a club, Despite the cicrumstances with this being his first time partying he had parted from his friends and decided not to get drunk .Unlike the other rowdy teens he was more cautious and instead found himself sitting on one of the bar stools and bouncing his knee along to the pulsating music. He knew he looked slightly out of place in his white furry jumper and tight cuffed jeans; this was another reason he decided to not associate himself with his friends and the sweaty bodies on the dance floor. He had been propped up on the high seat for about twenty minutes, occasionally having a blushing girl or over-confident guy confronting him and attempting to flirt, Pierre of course wasn't interested, his mind was drifting off in to boredom as he waited until he could leave. A voice had broken him out of his daze and he looked up, a bartender with a whispy quiff slicked back stood infront of him while he held a washcloth and cup in a hand. Pierre had found himself blushing constantly as the boy flirted shamlessy and flashed a toothy grin which Pierre could only describe as bright, possibly a reletive of the sun, maybe the sun itself. Two years later the cheeky and charming bartender was his boyfriend and Pierre had run away back to France to escape the taunting and abuse, hopefully gain back his normal eating habits and try see himself in a different light. But he had failed, a month in to his attempted recovery, which wasn't exactly working, he ran in to Nick again, and he was angry. Pierre's last two years have been nothing but punishment as he received broken limbs and swolen lips from this cruel man. This was his only escape.
But sometimes you strike. You get lucky. You find a place where no one will judge you, where the monsters are outside your walls and not inside your mind.
ROSEMARY-JANE HOLLAND:Rose and Pierre bonded over unappealing circumstances, Pierre was having a particularly bad day -most days were bad days actually- and his image was almost double as distort as usual, cracked even, he was guilty and loathing and found himself leaning over a toilet and emptying his guts out in to the porcelain bowl, the girl had walked in on him in the act of it and was appalled but it led to her being an unexpecting source of comfort for the feather haired boy.
DEVYN ROBERTS:Devyn and Pierre don't share much of a strong relationship but as room-mates Pierre can not help but pity the girl after an experience where she had been crying in the middle of the night, you could say there was an 'unspoken' friendship between them although it was particularly one-sided as Pierre couldn't see himself opening up to the girl.
DAKOTA ELISE CAVELL:Dakota is one of the people Pierre knew before coming to California, well it was more complicated than that. About a year ago Pierre had began to start talking to a girl named Zoe online, they had a great relationship and he found himself confessing many of his issues with his boyfriend to her and was almost like his getaway, his life was a merry-go-round he couldn't stop and he found comfort in the words of the girl he thought he had an amazing friendship with, the friendship soon turned in to more and he began to easily see himself being in a loving relationship with the girl, despite his heart belonging to someone else. After coming to the house and having a heated discussion with Dakota he learned he had been catfished and Dakota had a heartless outlook towards his situation only laughing as his one comfort turned out to be a girl playing with his emotions. Despite the circumstances he still feels a pull towards the girl and knows he would comply to anything she suggested or asked for.
VICTOIRE FLORENCE HALLOWAY:Toire is one of the only family members Pierre still keeps in contact with. The blonde lean girl is none the other than the boys beloved cousin, the two have always been friends sharing many similarities and bonding over the knowing of both the languages french and English, he'd always enjoyed the company of the girl and her family and the unfortunate ending to her parent's lives broke Pierres heart knowing two lovely people were dead as well as the fact that one of the people he loved most was likely to be torn up about the situation. He always tries to be source of comfort for the girl knowing that it can in fact be good to have blood relatives to lean on.
→ Would you say you're happy now? Would you say you enjoy where you've ended up, as hard as it was to get here? To be safe?
"No, not at all. I mean of course I'm grateful I'm here, I'm glad to be safe and that I'll be ridded of bruises but it will never take the constant weight on my shoulders away, I hardly think a simple place can ease the unbearable pain in my chest. I can't look at myself in the mirror without choking up and crying, and I can't help but think the image of me in broken shards of glass suits much better than a flat surface because I'm just not that and I will never be happy if this is the case"
→ What are you most afraid of? Who are you most afraid of? What happens when someone finds you and all you've ever known is gone?
"I'm afraid of what I'll turn out to be, it's pathetic because without him I feel kind of purposeless, I know what I'm doing, I can starve myself and make myself throw up and I can go to infinite extents and it still might not be enough, I need him to tell me that I'm still too fat, making myself determined is getting tiring and I often find myself thinking about what it would be like to just leave, I think the thought is quite nice, peaceful."
→ PIERRE BALLAND is currently TAKEN
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