Byleth flopped down on her bed with a huff. She had spent the better part of two hours just pacing. She had worn an obvious path in the dirt floor of her tent. But she hadn’t been able to sit still. And she couldn’t just go out and punch something, despite how much she wanted to. Witnessing a top commander beating the shit out of a tree was the last thing the beleaguered troops needed to see.
She lay there for a few minutes. She pulled her hands up over her face and let out a deep, frustrated sigh. If only she could do more. She had gotten a heart - she should be better at being comforting but she still felt so inept at it.
She wasn’t sure how long she spent like that, stewing in her own discontent. She could hear the camp quieting down as the night tracked on, and figured it was likely late.
A mouse could have spoken louder, yet suddenly Byleth was on her feet, hastily fumbling to light the lamp on her bedside table. Once light filled her tent, she turned, meeting the dull, teary violet eyes of her beloved.
“El, I...” she greeted, tentative and careful as if she was speaking to a timid deer, “Y...you’re up!”
El sniffled and nodded wearily. “May I come in?” she asked, her voice so frail it felt unfamiliar. Byleth realized that she was just barely peeking into the tent, and without another word, beckoned her in.
“So...” Byleth began somewhat awkwardly, “Are you...ok?”
Edelgard didn’t respond, instead heading over to sit on the edge of the bed. A flash of terror surged through Byleth that she might just collapse onto this bed and remain there for a few more days. But she shook the thought away.
El fiddled with her hands, not wishing for eye contact. Byleth noticed she was staring at the silver ring on her left hand. “I...I’m sorry, Byleth,” she uttered after a long pause, “I haven’t been...” Deep breath. “I’m sorry.”
“El, it’s ok,” Byleth assured her, moving to sit down beside her, “The things Cornelia said... They were awful and I don’t blame you for-”
“No, I... I’m sorry that...” She struggled, grappling with the words. “I’m not meant to have a family.”
For a brief second, Byleth felt her heart stop. “El...” she began.
“I...I had a family, once. It was big, and wonderful, and happy. We were all so happy and we loved each other but... Everyone’s gone.” She drew a deep, shuddering breath. “And then the people I didn’t know, the people who were family but weren’t... They...they left before I could love them, before they could love me, and... Now there’s no way to fix things.”
She looked up, then, meeting Byleth’s worried gaze. “Those monsters have taken every shred of my family and thrown them all into the void,” she stated, her voice trembling with unrestrained emotion, “Some of them they literally tore apart and others they just... If...if they realize I have more...” With a sudden, jolting motion, she reached forward and grabbed Byleth’s hands in hers. “I can’t lose you, too, Byleth,” she confessed, tears forming in her eyes, “If they take you, too...”
Byleth didn’t need her to finish that sentence. One look at her and she believed every word El said.
“El,” she began carefully, reworking their hands so she could rub her thumb gently across El’s knuckles, “I promise you, I won’t let anything happen to either one of us. If those bastards think they can take me down easily then they’ll receive a brutal lesson in hubris.”
“And I know you’ll keep me safe, too. You’ll keep all of us safe,” Byleth told her warmly, “El, when they did all those things to you... You were just a kid. No one would have blamed you for not stopping it. But now: you’re the furthest thing from helpless now, El. I’ve seen you take down whole battalions by yourself. You and I brought down a dragon, for goddess’ sake!” She released one hand, and gently reached up to brush away some of the tears on El’s cheek. “You are the strongest person I know.”
El sniffled before throwing her arms around Byleth, hugging her like her life depended on it. Quiet sobs wracked her body, so Byleth merely held her tight in return, once again rubbing those soothing circles until the sobs subsided.
“If you want me to be...”
“I do. More than anything.”
She couldn’t explain it, but the surge of joy those words caused in Byleth nearly caused her to blackout. But El wasn’t done.
“Any...any expansion to our family, be it children or more friends-”
“Yes. Like them... I won’t lose them this time. I swear.”
Byleth placed a gentle kiss to the top of El’s head. “I know you won’t, El.”
‘She would be proud of you,’ Byleth thought, ‘Your whole family would be.’
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