when i saw you the first time, my heart skipped a beat
you were right next to me, it was hard to breathe
we had small conversations, i could hardly speak
but there was something about you that made me want you
every time that i saw you, my eyes used to sneak glances at you
words can't explain what is it about you that draws me to you
though you were not mine, i wanted you even when i knew its wrong
i still remember the very first time we spoke alone, felt too good to be true
yet i never let my attraction towards you affect my thoughts
just starting out a friendship with you, was enough for me then
though sadly, you came like a strong wind into my life then left
i used to be right there, but you stopped looking at me
the hurt i felt when you ignored me, was liked being stabbed with a knife
then just like how you left you suddenly came back
i heard everything that you were going through and put everything aside to be there for you while you healed
i continued to have my guards up for i know if you walked away again i would never let you back in
but the more time i spent with you i started to let my heart do the thinking
not sure if it was the right thing but i could see the happiness on your face
told myself its okay to let my emotions flow for you and started to revolve my life around you
however one day i was told you were changing your relationship status and that is when i asked myself what had i got myself into
was thrown off guard for i would never have gotten emotionally involved with you if i had known
since then i have been questioning myself and blaming myself for being so weak
i know if i tell you i want to stop, you will be hurt and i don't want to hurt you but i am killing myself everyday
you have no idea how much i cry thinking of this as i don't know what to do
telling myself to be emotionally stronger and that one day be able to tell you this
and who knew that day will be today