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Kingsman and more

Kingsman Although this was an enjoyable move, I still can't figure out why Samuel L. Jackson decided to play his villain with a lisp. Yes, a lisp. Its kinda dumb but I guess if Jackson says he wants to play the guy with a lisp, you just let him. But did he have to keep wearing his baseball cap all sideways, I thought that went out in the 90's. With a huge homage to the James Bond movies of the 60's with the dangerous evil sidekick, a super secret headquarter, cool gadgets (no car) and a far fetch plan, the movie is fun and bouncy. Did I like this movie: Yes

Blackhat I hate stereotypes as much as anyone but sometimes, you just gotta go with it. In other words, sorry I just don't buy Chris Hemsworth, aka Thor to be this hacker who's trying to figure out who's chipping into the security stock exchange. C'mon man, the guy is huge and he's got his shirt unbuttoned half way down his chest while pounding on the keyboards. And just because he was in jail doesn't explain his physique. This was a horrible movie for other reasons and I don't think Matthew Broderick or Angelina Jolie could have saved it. Did I like this movie: No

Casablanca Yes, 73 years later I end up seeing this classic film. It took me this long because I was just never interested in seeing a movie about a old guy wearing a beige raincoat but a friend asked me to go see it on Valentine's Day so shit, why not. At first Humphrey Bogart is this whiny bitch who can't get over his ex girlfriend and than pouts like a sad sad man when she shows up again. I guess everything resolves itself at the end but Ingrid Bergman is the complex character that makes this movie sing. Did I like this movie: Yes

Hey poon I feel like any girl who actively listens to dvdasa eventually becomes open to most kinds of sex, but not many girls listen in the first place... Do you think Dvdasa can be used as a tool to make girls more sexually openminded?

You mean like you and your friend is hanging out in your bedroom on a warm summer day, you in your favorite worn in jeans, she in a spaghetti string sundress when you decide to nonchalantly put on the dvdasa podcast and than 3 hours later, you guys are making out and doing wheel barrel sex? Is that what you mean? I think what little women who listen to the show probably are already somewhat sexual explorers but if they're conservative prudes, I don't think David's voice or Asa's ass is going to change them. Sorry man, I wish it was the case.

Eating with Bobby

Since I'm not in the room when Bobby and Quiet C are having sex, I'd just assume everything is alright but yet she's always on him about his diet. I understand Bobby not wanting to lose weight because he just has to lay there while she's doing the cowboy position yelling "yippee kai yay mother fucker". But Quiet C is doing all the work but conversely Bobby loves to eat. Sometimes he calls me late out at night and I do enjoy watching him chomp down his food. There's a quiet serenity and happiness as he takes bite after bite into whatever unhealthy item he's ordered. Tonight, it was 2 slices of pizza - bbq chicken and pineapple ham. That guy just chows down his food but he's not completely unaware of his diet. He'll add a salad and pour a gripload of ranch dressing. Man, he's just so happy eating. But we're not even finished yet because we stop over at the ice creme store for a scoop of pralines n creme. I hope he keeps gaining weight, its going to be like watching an epic life experience in slow motion.

Hey Bill, were you at Lolicup tonight? I'm pretty sure that was you. I was too star struck to say anything.

LOL...yea I was. I'm always playing cards in the SGV but move from place to place. Lollicup was cool until the remodeled it and we overheard the manager say they don't like people playing games so they took away some of the tables. But really the worse is that short chubby girl behind the counter. She's always a bitch and her customer service sucks. Next time say hi man, its cool, I'll buy you a drink!

Taken 3

What? Taken 3 is still in the theater? Damn movie is still playing because the summer blockbusters haven't been released yet and places are rerunning the academy award nominees. Of course the first one was great with Liam Neeson being Liam Neeson and the memorable speech ("I don't know who you are, I don't know what you want...") but like movies, you have to stop at the third one. See Die Hard 3 (sorry Samuel L. Jackson), Aliens 3 (sorry Charles Dutton), Transformers 3 (not sorry Michael Bay). You can get away with one decent sequel but after that, it gets badly repetitive and the only way you can escape your third movie curse is to reboot it, Fantastic 4, take it in another direction, Fast & Furious 3: Tokyo Drift or end the story arc, Star Wars: Return of the Jedi. Actually, no one really gets "taken" in this movie but Liam Neeson, is framed for murder and is being chased by the police while looking for the real perpetrator - yea, this is pretty much the same movie as The Fugitive or The Gauntlet or The Green Hornet. Basically, people, particularly Black Actors, should just avoid movies with the number 3 in it. Sorry Forest Whitaker.

Fucking love the BBC Show. The quick upload time is so good, just wandering if you will be recording any more episodes soon? Thanks Bill

Thanks man and I have no idea if we're recording anytime soon. Everyone is doing shit that in the grand scheme of things, isn't gonna be memorable. Bobby is busy eating food in the San Gabriel Valley trying to appease his wife and Critter is still crying over the fact that beloved Raiders finished with a mighty 3-13 record (His Warriors look good though). Meanwhile I'm trying to figure out why my roommate likes to put corn and peas in her tunafish salad sandwich.

Eating in LA

The Asian American Journalist, Los Angeles put on an event featuring four Los Angeles Chefs consisting of Perry Cheung (Phorage), Roy Choi (Kogi Truck, A-Frame, Pot), Vivian Ku (Pine & Crane) and Tin Vuong (Little Sister). But since they're great cooks and not great speakers, they start sounding like blah blah blah after awhile but the q&a only took a quick hour. Personally I would have submitted the questions to them ahead of time so they could have some thought out answers and consequently it was like a Miss Universe contest, "ooh, I think we have done much for dreaming education and don't have maps and such as...thank you" so most of the answers were short and awkward. Actually Choi can spit words so he should just go last all the time. But here's somes question they asked and I'll just answer them.

How do you address the issues of your food being authentic? What they really want to know is not whether the food is authentic but rather if its traditional. My mom, who is Chinese and immigrated to Murrica in the 60's made egg foo yung and sweet and sour pork at her restaurant so why isn't that considered "authentic". She'd also make a steak, put some oyster sauce on it and served it to me on a bed of rice. Is that "authentic"? It was fucking good was what that was. Shiet, if you want something authentic, than have a Chinaman in China cook some stuff that smells up the kitchen and I can guarantee you it'll take years to appreciate that fine cuisine. Foodies need to get off their high horse and just enjoy people's cooking and not worry about their credibility.

Are Asian chefs expected to cook Asian food? Probably but look in the kitchen man. Its not science and more like labor camp which is why you see so many hard working Hispanics back there. If you want Asian people cooking Asian, try home cooking. That's where its at.

Would you eat Korean food made by a white guy? Of course. Why would you ask this question when these guys received their culinary skills in America and not necessarily in Asian cuisine. Are you trying to set them up?

Should food journalist be digging deeper? Obviously. If they're "journalist", than their paid job is to figure out what the hell is going on with the cooking. But most of the stuff you read are bloggers doing yelp reviews and its free so you get what you paid for. Mostly one star writing for one star criticism.

The event only cost $6.00 to non members of the AAJ-LA but got invited by my friend Andrew since he couldn't find a date. But what the hell, more free food in a cardboard box for me.

dude, you are the best. don't ever change

Thanks Billy Joel. I'll do my best.

Tina what? Tinashe

Mya, Pebbles, Ashanti, Christina Milan, young r&b singers that have a couple of break out singles and than become Christians or end up on Dancing with the Stars. I guess better than Indie bands who break up and return to their jobs as librarians or heavy metal bass players who go back to being a teachers assistant. But its always fun to support young musicians because the music is still good and the price to get in much cheaper and there's always a chance to catch them selling their ten dollar cd and button set at the merchandise table. Tinashe (Teen aah shay) is a little bigger than that since she already has a number one hit, 2 on, and was in a girl pop band (Stunner) that opened for Justin Bieber. Of course I never heard of her since I'm not young or urban but when my cousin asked me to go since his high maintenance girl friend ain't gonna stand for some show amid a bunch of obnoxious teenagers, I got the call. Kid behind me offered me ten bucks to switch places with him but shit, ten pieces of cheese isn't enough to spend five minutes listening to some girl talk dirty to me so I'm not moving.

Tinashe sings, dances and interacts with the audience who seem to know the lyrics to all her songs. I wonder if she's bummed that I'm not screaming or holding out my hands as she walks by. One of the dancers grab my hand and say's "hey, how come you're not jumping". Because I'm a fucking 54 year old overweight lover and you're not daddy mac so I'm not going to jump jump that's why. I also don't wave my hand up in the air like I just don't care, I'm more the nod my head to the beat type of concert goer. Its a short 45 minute set void of any soft sappy songs. Manchi does the same with their first few shows, much to my disappointment but I understand the need to keep the energy level high. I mean, she's sponsored by X-out acne for god's sake.

My cousin actually got us tickets for a meet and greet so we went early to basically get a photo with her. I guess you could take a few minutes to chat with her but really, what the hell do you talk about - like "hey, I know martial arts too". But its cool, Like how often do I get to stand next to a young r&b singer without getting kicked out by the school police. Never so yea, pretty cool.

"Bill, you are a fucking pudgy little midget that wears women's underwear to get off. You're damn near retirement age living off of your parent's properties and you permanently reside in the friend zone with every chick, paid or not. You have ZERO room to act superior to anyone, ever. You don't even have a personality or comedic value offset your flawed life."----Someone said this after Chapter 22. Can you respond to the haters who accuse you of attacking B'Lee and feeling superior?

LoL, what a bunch of morons, I had no idea my appearance on DVDASA would elicit such a response but you know, those people (or person) are the type that write letters to the network hoping to keep Mixology on tv while still upset that Asian chicks date White guys - Who really cares?Sounds like they need to eat some fiber cuz they seem to have a thick hard log of shit stuck up their hole but stuck on the seat afraid to use his one ply toilet paper to wipe it clean. But you seem like a nice person so I'll address some of the issues...

- living off my parent's properties. Actually just my mom. My dad passed away when I was 2 so my mom worked hard as a restaurant cook and bought herself a small apt. building. She passed away and left me the property. Its in a lower middle income area where the windows have bars over em and there's rent control so its not like I'm living a life of luxury. I've also worked corporate jobs prior to being an escort driver but they're not that interesting to talk about on the show.

- friend zone with every chick. Well first of all, not "every chick", I occasionally get lucky and have had girlfriends in the past but more importantly, why is it written like that's a bad thing? I actually like the company of women regardless if I'm fucking them or not.

- flawed life - yea I guess, I mean, we all have flawed lives don't we?

- attacking Bobby Lee and feeling superior. I was just calling Bobby out for some lack of etiquette more so than feeling superior. I do think Bobby is one of the funnier comedians out there and watch his routines over and over on youtube. Personally I like hisThe Kims of Comedy routine.

Inherent Vice

Inherent Vice is kinda like a cross between the movie Chinatown and Pulp Fiction, with its Los Angeles setting, snappy dialog, interesting characters and intertwining story lines but its not as great or entertaining as either of them but does make a good attempt. Set in the 1970's, "Doc" is a detective who see things through weed induced blood shot eyes and gets a visit from a bygone ex girlfriend who still stands close to his heart. What starts off as a simple routine investigation turns into a complex mystery involving a rich real estate tycoon, the police department, Asian hookers, nazi's, bodyguards, the FBI, underground informants, ties and dentists. And like Doc, you feel like you're missing something very obvious. But you're not. The cast is great with Joaquin Phoenix, Josh Brolin, Reese Witherspoon, Maya Rudolph and Benicio Del Toro but the movie is sabotaged by its own convoluted 2.5 hour story line that could have been trim down for more focus and clarity. Its like running on acid for hours but realizing that you've only gone 2 steps after a long night out.

Did I like this movie: Yes What I learned: Drugs bad, week not that bad.

Hey Poon, Have you ever considered or been offered working with other pornstars other than Asa Akira(If you still do) as a body guard, whore transporter, etc.

Not sure if you've seen DVDASA on youtube but I'm like a 5'4 chubby Asian dude with glasses that doesn't really have an intimidating face or physique. People are more inclined to ask me for directions or help answer trivia questions than be intimidated by my presence. I wouldn't mind transporting other porn stars but the 12 to 14 hour unknown wait time sucks donkey balls. Asa is very good about working our time out whereas I don't know about other girls.

bill, have you ever thought of just running an escort service or managing a couple escorts? you're already driving them, it shouldn't be too hard to just start arranging dates for them and taking a cut.

Its a pain in the ass. I've seen hookers and know how unreliable, lazy and dumb they can be. Of course I could really do a good job of screening and get some smart and responsible girls but guess what, if they were that, they would just be independent and keep all the money they deserve. And girls are never that busy, they need to hire a "booker" to keep their tab of their appointments. They just need to hike up their price a little, work less and make the same amount without increasing their administration issues. But thanks for looking out man.

Dear Client

Dear Client,

Normally I stay out of your business because...well, its your business and not mine. Some of you have pimps, some of you don't, I don't really care because I'm making mine. Now I understand that some of you need pimps because you have poor management skills or just too lazy to do simple administration work. But maybe you're tired of the verbal abuse and hitting so here's a few tips for going independent.

1. Gather some self esteem and fall out of love with your pimp. Sorry honey but just because he feeds you that booshit about being part of a "family" and buys you a Louie Vuitton bag don't mean he loves you back. Well he loves your money for sure which is why you give him everything, well except maybe the chump change for me to drive you to your next bed.

2. Get a PO Box. I'm assuming you don't have your own place of residency so you'll have to have a place for your mail to go to. What mail? Trust me, you'll need a place for mail.

3. Get your own credit card. Not the one he's sharing with you otherwise when he realizes you left, the next time you try using it, the person behind the counter will snip snip that shit in front of you. And you're left standing like a tardass in the hotel lobby. Because oh yea, hotel rooms require a piece of plastic to leave for a deposit and many of them won't take cash anymore. You can also use greendot Visa's from your local CVS or Rite Aid to help expedite the solution

4. Get your own phone. If he provided you the phone, he's probably paying for it too (with the money you made) so you know he's going to cut off one of your lines of communication. Go to Target or Walmart and get a cheap throwaway phone.

5. Create your own email address, one where the pimp doesn't have the password since Its not like he's going pass on your messages.

6. You might have to start your own escort site account. You don't need to make up some wacky story of how your account got "hacked". First of all, it really is hard to hack into someone's account unless you're like Sony Pictures. Just set up a new account where the password has nothing do with your old one.

That's just the start and hang in there. It'll be tough in the beginning but your new found independence is definitely worth the trouble. Good luck!

OG Poon! Respect for the Saelee interview. Crit is crazy for not being into her evil flirtation haha BBC!

Thanks byrdgangocho. Saelee is great and she's inspiring me to get back into my art that I abandoned decades ago. Her art is beautiful and I wish she would paint a mural on the side of some 40 story building in downtown so everyone could see her work.

A Girl Walks HOme Alone at Night - movie review

If you're a fan of Robert Smith, Bela Lagosi or a new take on old spaghetti westerns, you might like this black and white vampire movie. Written and directed by Iranian director Ana Lily Amapour, don't look for any socio- political themes in this simple black and white stylistic looking and off kilter movie about a lonesome vampire looking for her next meal and hopefully her next boyfriend. Like Tim Burton, the film is all in the art direction but Amapour does more with less and knows the importance of a streamlined story and minimal conversation. People keep calling this an "Iranian" film and sure, they speak in Farsi and the director is Iranian, but I'm not sure it makes the film "Iranian". I think they just say that to appeal to the hip indie crowd so that people can feel important and cool that they saw this film at the local art house theater. My mom use to cook a nice T-bone steak for dinner and added some rice. Did that make it a Chinese meal. No.

Did I like this film: No What I learned: Even vampires like to skate.

Hey pooner...what do you think of the new DVDASA site? you like what they posted about you?

People shouldn't take themselves so serious and just enjoyed the fact that someone took the time to write about them. That's how I feel about the new site. Hell, I said shit on the show and fans ran with it. I'm honored.

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