My grandma said "Nothing real can be threatened." True love brought salvation back into me. With every tear came redemption and my torturers became my remedy. So we're gonna heal. We're gonna start again. You've brought the orchestra, synchronized swimmers.
You're the magician. Pull me back together again, the way you cut me in half. Make the woman in doubt disappear. Pull the sorrow from between my legs like silk. Knot after knot after knot. The audience applauds ... but we can't hear them.
It’s been over five years
since I’ve known you
about as long as I’ve loved you
every part, every piece, every moment, every word
Five years. It’s about 1/4 of my short life
and yet, it somehow it feels even longer than that.
We all live a million lives and I know I’ve spent one with you.
But it’s time to bid one another farewell.
It was god, bad, joyful, painful, embarrassing and everything in between
We’ll find new lives from the ones we once shared.
The grief at what we shared ending feels overwhelmingly powerful, exuberantly distressing.
Because I swear, we were always supposed to have so much more, and it wold have never been enough.
To experience love is to set yourself on fire and come put the other side brand new, sparkling.
I’ve finally realized that I cannot it. Love isn’t mine to hold or manipulate it. I cannot bend it to my will. I can only observe it. Bask in its presence. Thank it for coming and ask it to return soon. It cannot, will not, be unnaturally prolonged.
We had a home for it once. Built brick by brick, cobbled together through promises and smiles, lingering looks and tentative touches.
I have nothing now. There have been enough mistakes, hurt feelings, hurled words in suspended humiliation for a lifetime. They’ve torn open my chest, emptied me from the inside and left my skin scorching.
I still believe we lived a million lives together.
We were stardust floating in the primordial ether, waves together crashing into one ocean, the clear, smooth surface of the water rippling in the breeze, blades of grass bursting forth from the same soil, gusts of wind blowing together in the same direction, rays of sunshine traveling down to kiss the leaves of trees growing side by side.
There I know our love still lives.
