There is so much to write here... I really want men like my dad in the world. He cries because he is proud of me or sad that I’m sad. He expresses his love for one of my ex-boyfriends every time he sees him because my dad knows my ex doesn’t have his father anymore/a functional family life at all. Where are those men?
Thankfully, several of my best friends are cis men, some of whom are straight. I have a supportive brother. I have multiple ex boyfriends that I try to keep in contact with because I still care about their lives. Two of my male English profs from high school and a smattering of male science teachers through the years (and a bunch of female science teachers too!) have strongly shaped my heart and mind and confidence. Clearly I would not be where I am today without the men in my life.
There are also men in this world swept up and socialized in ways that are a detriment to everyone. Violence, hiding of emotions, stigma against men seeking therapy, expectations of being the breadwinner or the person to initiate interaction (especially sexually), being able to drink the most, etc. All of these things contribute to pretty negative side effects of masculinity. This is a huge reason, I think, that there is so much violence from men against women or men against men (yes, women can assault men too, though it is proportionally a much much smaller problem).
In an attempt to engage my campus about negative ideals of masculinity in the US, I decided to do a screening of “The Mask You Live In” a new documentary directed by Jennifer Siebel Newsom. I invited people from our “male” student government contacted the “men’s” dean in Richmond College, a called FAME who go into high schools to mentor young men, and even contacted the frats indirectly. I wanted men to come watch this movie with female students. Alas, one male student and the male dean were 2 out of 15-20 people who came to the viewing.
Why are men not as engaged on the topic of healthy masculinity? What tactics would be best in engaging them on this topic? I really want to get to the bottom of this and start fixing this on our campus. One of the ways I want to start with that is by establishing connections between the aforementioned male-dominated groups and WILL* the “feminist” group I’m a part of (which sadly/understandably does not allow cis men yet).
Men, I care about you. Do you care about me? Do you care about you?
jacobvanloon
germansingergirl
kianamaiart
snowghoul
kaledo-art
gummygunk
titsay
andulkaphoto
vaporwave
