I wonder what's everyone first impression of their f/o was. It's just fascinating to me, because you generally don't get into something knowing one of the character is gonna change your life. It comes out of nowhere and I think that's beautiful.
I remember the first time I watched Sing 2. In an almost empty movie theater. I thought it was a beautiful film. I laughed, I cried, I loved every character. I missed Eddie, of course, but I adored the journey.
Darius was a character I barely noticed at that moment. He made me laugh, I thought he was cute… but that was it. I saw the movie with my sister and my mom in the theater, and then we watched it many more times at home.
One night, I watched it alone—because by then, I already loved that movie with all my heart. And I saw Darius… something in my mind made me want to look him up. I searched him on Google. Downloaded an image. Watched a clip from the movie. Then another. And another.
And something… happened.
He caught me.
It was November 13th, 2024—the day I accidentally realized I truly liked him. I laughed a lot at his character. I thought, “There’s no way I like him this much…”
But I did.
Something clicked in my heart. I realized that, as our dear Bella Swan once said:
“I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.”
I loved his attitude, his energy, how ridiculous and magnetic he is. The way he gives everything, feels everything… how he can be so intense, so sensitive, so insecure, so selfish all at once.
And so charming.
I spent the whole night watching him. Interviews with the voice actors, the movie’s social media, images on Pinterest, Tumblr, DeviantArt... And from that moment on, there was no going back.
Because, as always, I can’t truly enjoy something unless it consumes my soul completely.
Today, 200 days later, I’m just as in love. And with every passing day, I love him more.
He gives me something I can’t fully describe. He makes me happy. He calms me.
And he inspires me.
Thanks to him, I started drawing again after a long time.
Thanks to him, I wrote things I thought I’d never write again.
Thanks to him, I sang songs I hadn’t dared to listen to.
Thanks to him, I met wonderful people.
Thanks to him, Louisa was born.
And Louisa is, in many ways, a way of loving Darius from within his world.
(She’s not perfect, and she’s not meant to be, but I created her to be by his side—to love him the way he deserves.)
She taught me how to tell stories again. How to look with tenderness. How to create with joy.
I want to thank everyone who has supported me during these 200 days. To those who let themselves be touched by this affection, even just a little.
Thank you to my husband, who gave me his time, who supports me even while teasing me about my love for this yak.
Thank you to my friend, who gave me a plush yak for my birthday.
Thank you to my mom, who gave me another plush yak and a little sheep, and who always says yes when I want to rewatch the movie for the millionth time.
Thank you to my friend who printed a 3D figure of Darius for me.
Thank you to the artists I’ve commissioned and to those who gifted me little drawings of him, or captured him so beautifully with their art. It fills me with love to see Darius through their eyes.
Thank you to everyone who loves Darius and shares fanart of him. I wish I had found this fandom sooner so I could talk with all of you.
Thank you to everyone who reads my blog ✨ or my Facebook posts, and who are part of this journey of delulus and ugly drawings… but made with so much love.
Thank you to my friends who listen, who give me ideas, and encourage me to keep going. I love you.
Thank you to those fictional loves that were left behind, that couldn’t withstand the weight of the world or my lack of courage; thank you for preparing me for him.
Thank you to God for allowing me to feel this love.
Today, I just want to leave this here—as a reminder of what these 200 days have meant to me.
Because they weren’t empty. They weren’t foolish.
They were days full of art, music, inspiration, affection, and tenderness.
Today, I want to celebrate, because these have been 200 wonderful days.
If you were standing in front of me, I could tell you that...
I love you with all my heart.
Thank you for existing.
Thank you for arriving in my life so unexpectedly. You gave me back something I didn’t even know I was missing.
Thank you for every laugh you give me without knowing, for every emotion you sparked in me just by appearing on screen.
For being so extravagant, with such a big, fragile, intense… and beautiful heart.
I don’t know what the future holds. I hope you’ll always be in my heart.
But today, in this moment, I want you to know—as if you could read this from your universe—that you changed me.
You brought light to a part of me that needed to dream again.
And you taught me that loving is also a way of creating beauty.
Thank you, Darius, because in these 200 days you gave me an imaginary home, a beautiful illusion to return to every night, and a heart that beats stronger for you.
Thank you, because I truly feel—with all my soul—that I wasn’t the one who found you…
You were the one who found me.
🎨: @/Naibet Tsu
If I were made of ink and paper,
I could caress that cheek the light already envies.
I’d be words written upon your skin,
and every stroke, a caress the world would never understand.
What is a name, if not a shadow of what we feel?
Even if you weren’t “Darius,” I’d still love you.
What does it matter what you're called,
if my soul already answers to your voice?
Change your name if you must—
but never change that way you have of being light among ruins.
I would hide in every pause of your laughter,
in every sigh when you think no one's listening.
And if the world denied me a place by your side,
I would still seek you in dreams, in verses, in melodies.
Tell me, is it a sin to love so deeply someone who can’t hear me?
If it is, let eternity judge me—
but let it never erase this love that blooms even without solid ground.
"Terminé" este dibujo después de tres semanas, y honestamente… no porque fuera complicado, sino porque tengo la mala costumbre de saltar de un dibujo a otro. A veces me gusta una parte de uno, luego se me ocurre una idea nueva y quiero hacerla en otro, y así se me acumulan bocetos. Tengo más de 30 sketches sin terminar que nunca he publicado porque siento que se ven "feos" o incompletos.
Pero esta es mi advertencia: los voy a subir todos.
Quizá dentro de unos meses, o en un año, los vea con otros ojos. Tal vez haya mejorado un poco y me anime a terminarlos. O tal vez no. Pero están ahí, y forman parte de mi proceso. Este dibujo me hace feliz porque me recuerda cuánto amo dibujar y dibujarlo (sí, Darius, estoy hablando de ti), y aunque siento que él merece mucho más, me prometo seguir esforzándome por darle lo mejor de mí.
Gracias si llegaste hasta aquí, y gracias si ves algo especial en estos pedazos de lo que hago.
🩷✨🦬🩷✨🦬🩷✨🦬🩷✨🦬🩷
I finished this drawing after three weeks, and honestly… not because it was complicated, but because I have the bad habit of jumping from one drawing to another. Sometimes I like a part of one, then a new idea comes to mind and I want to st losart another, and so sketches keep piling up. I have over 30 unfinished sketches I’ve never posted because I feel like they look “ugly” or incomplete.
But this is my warning: I’m going to upload them all.
Maybe in a few months, or a year, I’ll see them differently. Maybe I’ll have improved a little and finally feel ready to finish them. Or maybe not. But they exist, and they’re part of my process. This drawing makes me happy because it reminds me how much I love to draw—and to draw him. (Yes, Darius, I’m talking about you.) And even if I feel like he deserves more, I promise to keep doing my best to give him the best of me.
Thank you if you made it this far, and thank you if you see something special in these little pieces of what I do.
Ah sí me inspiré con su permiso en este dibujo de Naibet Tsu 🩷
It's just a rough sketch, but I'm trying to find a style that lets me do things quickly and still look pretty. I don't know, but let's practice until we get it right, okay? Because Darius deserves more.
Es un boceto pero estoy tratando de buscar un estilo que me deje hacer cosas rápido y que se vean bonitas, no lo sé pero vamos a practicar hasta lograrlo ¿Ok? Porque Darius merece más.
I need to make this post because I feel it’s important. Especially for those in the self ship community.
I understand folks getting excited when coming across a new fictional crush and wanting to gush with others who also enjoy them as well, hell I have a few fictional characters that I’m like this with. I know it’s a thing. But in the self ship community I really need people to remember that not everyone is comfortable with folks gushing about how much they like the same character, especially on someone else’s personal posts about them or in an ask. Same thing with folks tagging others in someone else’s self ship post or even on canon x canon posts all because a f/o of theirs is there. I get wanting to make folks happy, but sometimes this will have the opposite effect.
Y'all really need to read people’s carrds/strawpages/pinned posts!!! I’ve seen multiple of other self shippers spiraling many times due to folks crossing their boundaries and not seeing if they are comfortable or not when it comes to sharing their f/os. Please ask folks before sending or doing anything. Even just dm’ing or sending a simple ask to someone will save a lot of trouble for everyone. And please PLEASE respect other people’s boundaries. Everyone in this community is trying to find comfort and get away from the stress of our daily lives outside the internet. We shouldn’t have to be stressed here too. And self shippers don’t need to give people an explanation to why they don’t share if they don’t want to, everyone has their own personal reasons. So please be respectful of others and their feelings as you would want others to be respectful of yours.
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