Angel o(^_^)o @pr0tonang3l - Tumblr Blog

uhh making a new intro because this one sucks,…

placeholder for a while because why did I keep this up for so long, the misinformation spread was NOT!!☝️ very nice so in the meantime, take this picture.

#Ooc post #Rambles

Ok…actually a bit tired..but really better….im sorry for the stressed I caused tonight….i love everyone..goodnight…^^ -💉🩸

GAH I WASNT ON TUMBLR THEN BUT!!! BAU I THINK YOURE REALLY COOL AND IM SOSO SORRY YOURE FEELING SO BAD AND IM VERY GLAD YOU DIDNT GO THROUGH WITH IT IM VERY SORRY IM NOT GOOD AT COMFORT BUT UHM I KNOW WE DONT TALK MUCH BAU BUT I THINK YOURE AWESOME AND ITS NOT YOUR FAULT YOU HOLD EMOTIONS!!!!!!!

thank youuu…^^ -💉🩸

@sweet-sacrificial-lamb holding you, we went through a pet loss too, itll be ok…um…Pat Pat. Sorry I’m not much help right now..-💉🩸

gonna listen to more music and see if I feel completely better before I sleep….maybe go downstairs for orange juice instead of pills…or our lemonade…yum.. -💉🩸

hirointheshamen

Made someone form a new girl tonight

pr0tonang3l

hmmm…who? If you don’t mind answering…. -💉🩸

listening to Astrid…her new song abt my source comes out today….im really looking forward to that…I still wanna cry a bit more but I’m just sad now, not suicidal. Which I think is good. -💉🩸

@skekthesilly @sunny-starflower-constellation I love you…goodnight…I’ll try and be here in the morning..I think I might have another breakdown but I’ll calm down.. -💉🩸

maybe I should try and sleep.. sleep sounds nice. -💉🩸

sadness is hard for people to be around a lot of people don’t know how to handle it with themselfs or others and it’s hard to sit with. if you can try to distract yourself with something fun. or something you used to love as a kid. take care of yourself it sounds stupid, but put on a nice show get some cute pjs on and cozy up :) maybe a book or draw something vent art was really helpful for me. get yourself some sleep pookie. there’s a lot of people who love all of you and all the light your bring 🫀

Thanks, -💉🩸

skekthesilly

goodnight bau. i love you. please stay

pr0tonang3l

please mean that I love you…please do…don’t get my hopes up please..I love you. -💉🩸

Bau, I dont think you understand just how integral you are to many of our lives. You've convinced yourself that we will quickly forget you despite the fact you're in our daily routine.

In just one example: I (and our system) check this blog every morning, and at least two more times after school and before bed. if some day you were gone we would grieve you for years. we would look over screenshots and old posts and wonder if we could have saved you. we would miss your words, we would miss how happy we felt talking to you. we would miss you deeply because we love you deeply.

this kind of adoration doesnt produce grief only weeks long. and I know we are not the only ones to love you so deeply. I know it does not feel that way, I am very familiar with the feeling myself, but know that we will grieve you if you died. Grieve you for years to come. anything less would be untrue.

We may pretend not to be grieving in the way we are, it may seem we are ok. but just a glace at something that reminds us of what could have been, a glance at something that was, would likely make many of us cry intensely.

We will all carry this grief with us for as long as we may live, I know we will. I am so sure we will that I promise you that fact.

We all love you so much, we care about you so much.

We love you Bau, I hope someday you come to truly believe that

-🪶

please don’t leave me either….i love you… -💉🩸

pr0tonang3l

bau don't. bau do not. bau literally do not. bau you need to stay.

skek..even if I didn’t…which I’m pretty sure I won’t anymore but still….you would probably be ok.. you have Inx and the others..sorry. I love you. I’m still here though. I know I don’t make sense, I can barely see what I’m typing because of my tears sorry -💉🩸

skekthesilly

bau. hey. firstly i'm glad you're not going through with it. i'm really really glad. because secondly even if i do have all my friends and all my partners it absolutely would not be the same if you were dead. okay. i'm so serious if you died i dont think anyone in this little group of ours would be able to function anymore. you mean so so so much to everyone even if it doesn't seem like it. even if you're shadowbanned and i can't see your pings and i miss your posts i still love you. okay. and i'm glad you're staying. because if you didn't i and everybody else would be very not okay. and no need to apologize

pr0tonang3l

yeah but wouldnt the sadness just last a month at max….then everything would go back to normal…no one cares when we’re gone anyways. And it’s taking all my willpower to not go downstairs right now..not much of a difference wouldve happened. It’s just like whenever we’re grounded..life would still be growing except I’m just gone. Sorry. Sorry skek. I don’t think angels gonna be happy in the morning after this. -💉🩸

skekthesilly

bau i can assure you it would not last a month max. and nothing would go back to normal. there'd be a gaping hole where you used to be. just stay. just stay please. you don't have to have a whole big revelation and suddenly stop being sad anymore. just stay. be sad, be upset, be apathetic, but stay please. i love you

pr0tonang3l

But people don’t like me when I’m upset, they don’t know what to do or what to say and it.makes me feel worse and then I’m left all alone and uncomfortable….skek I’m sorry I’m really sorry I never wanted to put this on you..I’m sorry..I can’t see what I’m typing either my eyes are too blurry. Are you sure you love me. Are you really sure. Please just tell me if you don’t and you’re saying it out of pity. Please don’t get our hopes up -💉🩸

I really want to. Why is no one in headspace here to take over…why am I alone…they know I’ll do something if I’m alone…sorry..sorry.sorry. -💉🩸

sweet-sacrificial-lamb

I think I'm gonna take a break for a bit. My phone is almost dead anyway

pr0tonang3l

I’ll miss you..-💉

i love you so much. I wish i could do more

I wish I wasn’t as sensitive and emotional so I wouldn’t have to worry you so much….i love you too… -💉🩸

pr0tonang3l

bau don't. bau do not. bau literally do not. bau you need to stay.

skek..even if I didn’t…which I’m pretty sure I won’t anymore but still….you would probably be ok.. you have Inx and the others..sorry. I love you. I’m still here though. I know I don’t make sense, I can barely see what I’m typing because of my tears sorry -💉🩸

skekthesilly

bau. hey. firstly i'm glad you're not going through with it. i'm really really glad. because secondly even if i do have all my friends and all my partners it absolutely would not be the same if you were dead. okay. i'm so serious if you died i dont think anyone in this little group of ours would be able to function anymore. you mean so so so much to everyone even if it doesn't seem like it. even if you're shadowbanned and i can't see your pings and i miss your posts i still love you. okay. and i'm glad you're staying. because if you didn't i and everybody else would be very not okay. and no need to apologize

pr0tonang3l

yeah but wouldnt the sadness just last a month at max….then everything would go back to normal…no one cares when we’re gone anyways. And it’s taking all my willpower to not go downstairs right now..not much of a difference wouldve happened. It’s just like whenever we’re grounded..life would still be growing except I’m just gone. Sorry. Sorry skek. I don’t think angels gonna be happy in the morning after this. -💉🩸

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