bigjoys and smalljoys

words that have nowhere else to go

[prickelypear]

seascape

[prickelypear]

condemned souls make for holy melodies. demons have the voices of angels, and baby are we hellbent now

[prickelypear]

its lovely to think that out there is a single star that has been called a million names. the ancients named it, the romantics named it, i named it, you named it. it has a million faces but only one. you loved it as a lovers name, i loved it as your name.

[prickelypear]

It’s crazy how wide and narrow the world is. I am thinking about an old friend while in the shower. The old friend is thinking about the homework her teacher set. The teacher is thinking about what to buy for dinner. Across the world, a girl is thinking about her destroyed home. So many people, so many thoughts, so many feelings. But all are feelings and thoughts that have been experienced before. I have never felt so alone without being lonely. Across time, across millions of years, every one of these thoughts have been had, every feeling felt. Maybe its all ok.

[prickelypear]

I hope that I can find someone who makes me feel warm. But a permanent warmth, not the turbulent, absent, overwhelming warm I am feeling now.

[prickelypear]

I think that the most human thing humans do is dance. They dance well and terribly and loudly and softly and really what better feeling is there then to let loose to all the sounds, or simply no sounds at all.

[prickelypear]

I read this quote from IT the other day about no good friends and bad friends only friends who you need. And I really liked that. It made me feel less alone, like maybe all my friendships weren’t shit or going to shit. Like I have people in the way other people have people.

[prickelypear]

I think maybe the reason I find space and the stars so intriguing is that I can really, truly get lost in them. We all can. It proves to us we don’t really matter. And while this may be upsetting to some, it is the greatest comfort the universe can spare me. It reduces my problems to nothing. My selfishness, my emptiness, my actions to nothing. Maybe I’m not the worst person in the world. Maybe I’m nothing at all.