Life of a Daydreamer @princesspare - Tumblr Blog

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it feels like its over

when i can look at a bottle and not wince as the taste

when i can turn the lights on and not feel like im blind

when i stop running my hands against a clasp.

but then i think about how i can skip rocks now

and how after a few jumps across the water-

they too, sink.

An excerpt from my journal aka the book I’ll never publish but am too proud of: part 2

It seems like every so often life takes a tumble and I find myself so painfully and unbelievably sad. Maybe I have a small predisposition to it. Maybe it's just a product of brokenness. Regardless, It seems as though I’m spending every season of the year teaching myself to be happy again. Teaching myself to let go, to learn, to understand that sometimes in order to keep growing we need to get cut down. Teaching myself that there is a reason. So here's to summer, where I get yet another chance to learn what is important and what isn't, to walk away from insecurities and to walk towards things like water and campfires.

i know i made a post about yoga like 3 posts back

but seriously it is changing my life

sweeterthananywine

aw that sucks :(

me as a professional therapist (via spankmehardbarry)

#actually though

Don't you for a second think that there is ever a day I don't think about how Mitchell shaped my adolescent and teen years. Literally been living 12-20 thinking about how much of my love for certain things came from his mind. Death cab for fucks sake was because of him.

An excerpt from my journal aka the book I'll never publish but am too proud of.

I read more of Lauren Graham's autobiography this morning because I kept having nightmares and I couldn't fall back asleep. She talks about "making it" as an actor, and how most actors don't ever feel like they've "made it." And I'm reading this, thinking to myself, "actors never knowing when they've 'made it'... see also: adults." Because I keep forgetting to email a few teachers, I get caught up in my own feelings, my room was a mess, I had to stop in the middle of a workout because I was in so much pain, my car was on E (note to self: it still is), and I felt like I was drowning in class work that I didn't understand. But today I promised myself I would clean my entire room. Made a plan for how to learn things, and thought about how I'm still working on not putting everything in my life under a microscope ((including myself)) and overthinking everything. And because of this, It's been an "am I making it? I think I'm making it!" kind of day. So I guess my question is, is there even a "made it"? Do we ever really make it, whatever it is. Or, where ever it is? Or are those all just moments, to give us something to hold onto when we're questioning our footing? Tomorrow my room will get messy again, Tomorrow I'll likely forget my car is still on E, and I'll be running late to work. But that just makes me the kind of person//adult who feels like I'm making it in this moment, and who will feel that way again. Lauren also wrote about meeting the author James Patterson. When she asked him "so, how do you do it?" he answered her with "keep going, keep going, keep going."

yall i just had the most revitalizing yoga experience

Lenin: "There are decades where nothing happens; and there are weeks where decades happen."

I used to think that my passion in life was change. For years, near the end of high school and for a little while after - you know, the time in your life when *everyone* is asking what you want to do with in life and "well, what's your passion?"? Yeah, that's where I would literally just think to myself “change”.

As I've “aged”, I've learned the value in staying still. In building a sort of home, and becoming a regular, and having some sort of reliable structure in my life. I've gotten a little farther away from that person who was constantly running towards the next big change, but she's still very much a part of me. And shes still looking for more and for change. Except, again "as I get older", the change I'm passionate about becomes less about the walls I'm surrounded by, and more about what's going on inside of me.

virtual lobotomy,

everybody is trying to save their heads.

funmomenergy-deactivated2020052

i made a college vine compilation b/c Suffering™️

(warning for loud noise in some of them)

also can i just say shout out to my parents for not allowing me to get tattoos till i was 18 because good lord 14 year old me wanted frank ieros face fucking tattooed on my calf and a huge ass treble clef sign on my arm.

good lord what a waste of ink that would have been...

Yo im bouta spit some new years resolutions

UNO! drink some more fuckin water you know its the only thing that keeps your skin clear stop complaining about how much you have to pee and keep up with your skin regimen you better keep that smooth baby face all throughout the year ho

TWO! it has been some tryin times my friend and you are emotionally everywhere so chill the fuck out for at least two seconds a day! take a damn breather and stop stressin every little thing. you can not have complete control of everything and what you have learned most from the last year is to just go with the flow. stop over thinking all the things everyone does and sayzz because youre driving yourself insANe which is a no no because you gotta keep yourself happy!!!!

TROIS! DO NOT! let go of your damn goals!! you hate what youre doing and where you are right now but you gotta power through and do it well!! keep doin random side shit! its what makes you happy and keeps you sane! but think of the future and where you want to end up homie it will be worth it if you reach the finish line that you set and then set some more goals because never stop!!!!!

CHAHAR! you better fucking wake up every day and move your body. stop being lazy, stop staying up too late to be able to move in the mornings. you have goals to reach and health to achieve so wiggle that butt of yours and get a damn work out in. no better time than the morning plus you can forget about it for the rest of the day!! and eat some fucking kale!!

KHAMSE! you are not skipping more than 5 classes this semester you are not allowed im pretty sure you went to one of your classes 6 times the entirety of last semester. none of that shit is allowed anymore it is a new year and you are allowed to “new year new me” this hoe go to your damn classes and make friends with your teachers you need them to like you

SHISH! fall in love!!!! with everything!!!!!! it is so much fun to love everything and you know what even though you were told you care too much it is so much better to care too much than to not care at all. listen to more good music! find a new hobby!! just create a life of love and jam pack it full of emotion better go all out youll end up crying i already know but hey it might be happy tears!!!

HAFT! go somewhere youve never been before. i dont care if its just down the street and to the left instead of the right. go. and go alone if you have to! you love that shit! you love the time you spend with yourself stop feeling like you have to have someone with you in order to make an experience matter. you matter too. and take pictures - god never stop taking pictures you used to love that shit. find your passions again i swear theyre still there even though theyre a little dusty. just get out there its very possible

YEDI! keep writing. you know how much you love it. why do you keep putting it off? dont procrastinate your own hobbies you dumbfuck why would you do that. and write about everything. things you enjoy and the ones you dont and the people around you and just literally everything that pops into your brain just write it i swear it makes you feel so much better

SEKIZ! speak up. i know youre supposed to go with the flow but also fight against the current if its pulling you down. recognize the difference between a small wave and a riptide.

10. know that youll be fine and nothing is the end of the world. and everything happens for a reason.

Not to be Overly Emotional™ online but I didn't actually think it was possible to miss a human this much lol bye

what do you think would happen if i took 5 classes over the summer

i wonder

yo you know when you fail a class and fuck up your gpa lol good

Yo I'm needy and things just arnt fair at times. SADS 4 lyfe tho

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