Rule 1: Fuck The Rules. Literally.

<20m pan introvert> make money, do life, stay thicc of ass and high on spite

[calliope-13]

soooooo how do gays just like meet irl???? asking for a friend.

me. i’m the friend.

[probably-an-android]

Pretty sure it’s a myth

[probably-an-android]

[probably-an-android]

[probably-an-android]

Teachers be acting like you should be spending all your time on their class and the other classes are just hoes but they all think that

[probably-an-android]

This isn’t the sign for help, by the way

[probably-an-android]

Don’t know who made this but I read the beginning as “I’m creaming” and

[probably-an-android]

If you asked me to sum up my 8-year best friend’s relationship with me

[probably-an-android]

[probably-an-android]

Overheard part of a conversation from a table a ways away from me:

With slight disdain: “There’s no pussy on this grilled cheese...”

[probably-an-android]

Copy/Paste #1

Me and my high school friend group (in a very christian private school) had a game where any time someone said something, you could say “copy” and then the next time you say “paste” they have to say it again word for word without context. So senior year we’re hanging out doing whatever and two of the people in this group are girls and they do a standard *we’re friends and we’re being fun and cute* bit. After years of being shit at this game, my time has come. I turn to my buddy Will and say “paste”. And without skipping a beat he says:

“See this is the problem with lesbians. It’s two hot girls that I can’t date.”

[probably-an-android]

Airsoft has taught me that if you shoot enough plastic at random strangers, you start to legitimately gain confidence in yourself in general. Just me?

[probably-an-android]

[probably-an-android]

Happy thanksgiving eve y’all

[probably-an-android]

I’ll never truly be an adult as long as lego exists

[probably-an-android]

circa 2018

[probably-an-android]

[slime-crafters]

I wish birds spawned in more biomes than the jungle. Like, lil black birds in vast flowered land, and blue jays in soft forests and snow banks.

That would be so cool, and I think it would very much increase the serotonin levels that we experience.

[probably-an-android]

I was scrolling and thought you were talking about real life and I was like, do you not have birds. There are 58 birds in my yard at all times