i would like to know more about the thing about illicit affairs.
like literally anything. how did u come up with the plot? are there any scenes that didn’t appear in the story? id there anything u want to change? even some fun facts!
YAYYYY thank you so much oh my goodness YES here are some Director's Commentary thoughts and rambles about my fic illicit affairs:
it started as just: we desperately need a friends with benefits verse for byler, and this was in 2022 when byler smut would basically get you crucified on main, so i knew a) i needed to make a new account for it and b) i wanted it to be so juicy, so in-character, and so GOOD that it could entice even the closet-smut enjoyers. (considering i'm approaching 40k hits on that story, i think i succeeded in that aspect)
i actually just looked back at my outline, and it's pretty much exactly what y'all ended up reading with very little changes. because i started off thinking of it just in snapshots - how could i convey the arc of their FWB vibes over a handful of sexual encounters that each feel different and unique both sexually and emotionally?
in fact, since i have it, this is the original outline i wrote for the fic! you can see that it pretty much matches up perfectly chapter-by-chapter, except for that number 2 ended up squished in with chapter 1.
if anything, i would have loved to write a little bit more between chapters 1 and 2, when they're first starting their FWB relationship and exploring sexually, before they're fully comfortable with the situation like they are in chapter 2. like, in chapter 2, mike is fully dirty talking and using pet names like baby and darling - i would have loved an in between chapter (or a few) of them experimenting and getting to that level. imagine will melting the first time mike calls him darling. swoon.
chapter 3 is my favorite because it's all about the romance that they can't acknowledge is romance. but it's objectively romantic!!! moonlit lovemaking under the stars! but then, that pesky no-kissing rule, and the pesky miscommunication, where they both think they're messing it up by how in love they are with the other. sigh.
chapter 4 is the bottom mike scene that some folks were surprised about because i tend toward bottom will; this was just because i headcanon them switching, and this fic is so about them exploring sexually that it would feel amiss not to include it and show their relationship that way as well. plus, i'm a sucker for using position switching as an emotional beat to show vulnerability, so it fit perfectly in that way too.
and of course, chapter 5, the beautiful conclusion, where they're in love and they know it, where they can kiss freely - i wanted it to be explosively amazing, but also lighthearted and funny and over the top. so naturally they had to break the d&d table. did i take liberties with the practical applications of spit as lube? yes, absolutely, but i apologize for nothing.
i'm mostly asexual, so to me, the beauty of exploring a FWB-to-lovers arc is exploring the idea that sex alone isn't enough for these characters. they want love, they want tenderness, they want each other. and playing with that was so so so fun.
thank you for the ask!!!!! and to the few others who asked as well, i appreciate each and every one of you.